[butters]

"Solid wood" laminate dining tables. Cocksuckers!
Does anyone have any advice on how to purchase a dining table made of actual wood that doesn't cost the earth?

Buy the wood you want.
Buy 6 sash clamps (or borrow them from a school; you're a teacher?)
Glue then together.
Sand it.
Oil it.
Stick it on some legs/old table/oil drums
Eat dinner/relentlessly mark exercise books to prove you're doing your job

This.

Rent a Router too.
Woodwork soothes the soul.


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Or buy something off Ebay and then do it up yourself. Bought a solid Teak table off Ebay for £11 and shrapnel a few years ago and then did it up (should note that the materials to do it up was about 4 x the price I paid for said table) but it was still nowhere near the price I would have paid for the equivalent then and 60's\70's teak furniture is the new gold.

OMM is right though about woodwork being a soother of the soul - it is an amazing experience and as long as you don't have hands of ham then it's not overly difficult, just be kind to the wood as it is far older than you. 

Feel free to PM me if you need tips on such things - I am no expert at all but have done a bit and know a few people I can ask if it is beyond me

[Oldmanmatt]

The one tip that really made a difference to this metal worker, came from Rueben's (alien rock) dad.

Work with the grain.

Seems obvious when you hear it, but harder to achieve than you think.


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[tomtom]

I'm glad you all feel relaxed and achy after rubbing your wood hard.

[dave]

Or just go an buy a table from Ikea.

[andyd]

Or just go an buy a table from Ikea.

And while you're at it one of those black and white new York long exposure pictures too because they're as good as anything you'd get off a professional photographer.

[dave]

The fuck are you on about? He asked for somewhere selling a table made from solid wood, and Ikea sells them.

[tomtom]

IKEA has self service checkouts now too...

[psychomansam]

The fuck are you on about? He asked for somewhere selling a table made from solid wood, and Ikea sells them.

Solid particle board. Their fanciest table boasts about having a layer of actual wood on top of the sawdust.

[dave]

The fuck are you on about? He asked for somewhere selling a table made from solid wood, and Ikea sells them.

Solid particle board. Their fanciest table boasts about having a layer of actual wood on top of the sawdust.

The one we have, bought a few years back (probably 2008 ish) is proper wood.

[andyd]

The fuck are you on about?

I read this...

Or just go an buy a table from Ikea.

...you meant this

Ikea sells them.

One is useful information, one suggests that you should be happy with any old shit. I drew a tongue in cheek parallel.

[tomtom]

Taxi for the IAAF please.

[mrjonathanr]

  Q: Who was Vice President of IAAF whilst this fiasco/ allegations of corrupt connivance at doping went on?

A: Lord Coe.   
'"It is a declaration of war on my sport. There is nothing in our history of competence and integrity in drug testing that warrants this kind of attack." '
(August 15 in response to Sunday Times and German broadcaster ARD/WDR)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/athletics/34765357. BBC today

Today, Dick Pound, chairman of the World Anti-Doping Agency commission investigation into doping among Russian athletes, says the findings are "worse than we thought" and calls for Russia to be banned from competition.

Wada's independent commission examined allegations of doping, cover-ups, and extortion in Russian athletics, which also implicated the IAAF, the sport's world governing body. It also wants five athletes and five coaches to get lifetime doping bans.

 The report, instigated after allegations made on German television in December 2014, also identified "systemic failures" in the IAAF that prevent an "effective" anti-doping programme.

This is the same Lord Coe who knew about the evidence presented in Dec 14, came out denying it had any basis in August and now is supposed to be the fit person to lead the IAAF back to ethically sound ways?

No, no, no.

[tomtom]

It's a steaming pile of shite...

[dave]

Sorry I can't get past "Dick Pound".

[mrjonathanr]

You've got to respect any man who can build a successful (not straight-to-video) career with such a moniker.

[dave]

Especially since his name presumably is Richard, and yet he's chosen to be known as Dick. Dick Pound. Like a secure facility where stray dicks off the street are rounded up by dickcatchers with huge nets.

Or a unit of internal currency at a pr0n casino. "I'll see your hundred dickpounds, and I'll raise you two hundred".

Or a verb, as in "to dickpound".

Or an imperial unit of measure, for weighing a phallus. Maybe the average johnson weighs one dickpound.

[Mike Tyson]

One of my personal favourites:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/olympics/2008/03/about_ben_dirs.html

(Mind, I'm hardly in a position to mock other people's names)

[mrjonathanr]

Especially since his name presumably is Richard, and yet he's chosen to be known as Dick.

He's American. if he were Charles, it would be Chip. That's how those folks roll.

Back to business. Am I alone in thinking that Seb Coe -a man I quite admired for his achievements and his apparent integrity- is now a part of the problem rather than its solution?

[dave]

Especially since his name presumably is Richard, and yet he's chosen to be known as Dick.

He's American. if he were Charles, it would be Chip. That's how those folks roll.

Canadian.

[andyd]

Especially since his name presumably is Richard, and yet he's chosen to be known as Dick.

He's American. if he were Charles, it would be Chip. That's how those folks roll.

Back to business. Am I alone in thinking that Seb Coe -a man I quite admired for his achievements and his apparent integrity- is now a part of the problem rather than its solution?

Mud sticks. Even if he is a good guy there is doubt so he's got to go eventually. Bonkers.

[Fultonius]

He apparently voted FOR cutting working tax credit so he's clearly a cvnt.

[mrjonathanr]

Mud sticks. Even if he is a good guy there is doubt so he's got to go eventually. Bonkers.

In the context of athletics I don't doubt he's a good guy. He's a party man though, votes along party lines in the Lords and defends previous IAAF regime. Massive error of judgment attacking the German evidence. Killing the messenger instead of engaging with the message. We've all made blunders, but this one disqualifies him in my view as part of the ancien régime he was defending.

[Oldmanmatt]

Mud sticks. Even if he is a good guy there is doubt so he's got to go eventually. Bonkers.

In the context of athletics I don't doubt he's a good guy. He's a party man though, votes along party lines in the Lords and defends previous IAAF regime. Massive error of judgment attacking the German evidence. Killing the messenger instead of engaging with the message. We've all made blunders, but this one disqualifies him in my view as part of the ancien régime he was defending.

Fiddling whilst Rome burns, without doubt grounds for resignation.
Having once rubbished the charges, it is unlikely that he is in a position to acknowledge the full scope now (or, at least,  he would need to be seen to reverse himself entirely and that would not be a unbiased position either); leaving him in an untenable position as both the president who presided over the debacle and it's most vocal agent of dismissal.

I suspect, as per Blatter,  he is far too arrogant to understand that point (his political life seems to suggest an ideologue, without a great deal of empathy), the matter will spiral out of control and IAAF self-destruct.


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[webbo]

There was talk on bike radars forum linking him via his coach to blood doping before it was made illegal. So he may not be the squeaky clean hero he makes out to be.
Athletics clearly has as big a drug problem as cycling but they are just better at hiding it.
Linford Christie got popped for Nandrolone, he was about 100 times over the limit, yet Roger Black, Steve Cram and Sally Gunnell were all coming out to support him.

[tommytwotone]

Sorry I can't get past "Dick Pound".

The producer / writer / director (can't remember which) of popular US cop / legal drama is called "Dick Wolf". Like a normal wolf, but a right fucking dick.