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Tarned and Feathered (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/04/tarned-and-feathered.html)
8 April 2010, 10:58 am
My god I'm busy. A long absence from posting has been because my life has contained little but work and training these past few months. The pace of writing lectures, trying to keep up with research and actually teach at the same time has been draining. Each tomorrow creeps in it's petty pace with little time to catch breath. On the days when I train I'll work until 6, go straight to the wall, go home, eat and straight to bed. The days I don't train, and most weekends I catch up with work. I know people who fit in climbing around this schedule and have time for small kids too. Frankly, I am in awe. Easter sees the students leave and gave an opportunity to prove it's not all work, work work. For once I persuaded the wife not to go to Spain, and tickets to Tarn were booked. I had pretty high expectations; after all I finished last year on a high, and had worked like a bastard to keep the training up. Plus, Tarn's all soft touches anyway, right? So now I'm back. The trip was good and bad. On one hand, I discovered that "Le Bel Ete" in Sainte Enimie serves the best crepes in the known world. On the other, my climbing was a constant source of frustration. This is a damning fact because, viewed objectively, I have to admit it was a pretty good trip. I was consistently onsighting the 7c's and 7c+'s. Hell, I even snagged an 8a flash, albeit on Moules Frites which is not the hardest 8a around, to put it delicately. (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_03VgytvReXY/S728reSto5I/AAAAAAAAAFM/1cZurDSb94Y/s320/IMG_2895.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_03VgytvReXY/S728reSto5I/AAAAAAAAAFM/1cZurDSb94Y/s1600/IMG_2895.jpg) Bruno crushing Les Ailes du Desir
So the fact that I feel bummed out about this has prompted me to take a bit of a look at my expectations and self motivation. I think my feelings have three root causes:
- My performance is a backwards step from last autumn. The 7c+'s I did were real fights, and they felt pretty casual in Rodellar.
- My expectations were too high. I thought I'd be crushing 8a onsight, and maybe even snag another 8a+ flash. In retrospect, I'm not there yet.
- (and this is the kicker) Bruno was better than me.
Bruno and I have known each other since university and I have always, always been better than him - even at long pumpy routes at which he excels and I suck. In the years we've known each other he has got steadily better and on this trip he was quite clearly better than me on those long routes. I did not deal well with this fact. (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_03VgytvReXY/S729mInjt8I/AAAAAAAAAFU/9BVq0ljN_C0/s320/IMG_2912.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_03VgytvReXY/S729mInjt8I/AAAAAAAAAFU/9BVq0ljN_C0/s1600/IMG_2912.jpg) Bruno crushing a 7b+ at Tennessee
So Tarn has reminded me that I can be too competitive. But to be aware of this fact is to be curiously liberated of it. Just by typing this post I am starting to feel better; happier with my climbing and pleased for Bruno without the complicating pangs of jealousy I felt on holiday. Freed from this jealousy I am starting to feel the psyche return, fuelled by the simple joy of climbing great routes on good rock in the company of old friends. If only I didn't have all this work to do...
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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formula weekend (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/04/formula-weekend.html)
18 April 2010, 8:18 pm
This weekend looked like it was going to be pretty miserable. Saturday dawned clear, sunny and warm. I had to work; getting Mondays lecture written so I didn't have to wing it in front of 70 students. luckily I pulled a blinder and got everything done, so I was free to climb on Sunday. And so this morning, bright and early, the missus and I bundled into our shiny red mini and trundled peak-wards. we thought we'd check out Thor's cave. ever since Spikes dad put in a mega bolting effort this has been one of the best sport crags in the peak. sadly it's wet. Hold your horses cave fans. And so it was we trundled up to the trusty old Tor. Mr Davies was present, and Stone (as always). About three years ago Ru put Seraphim up on the RHS of the crag. It's short, gnarly and hard; with one desperate move but sustained from start to finish. Strong steve repeated it this week and I thought it was about time I tore the route up and ticked one of the best short routes in the UK. Oh dear. That move hasn't got any easier, has it?Rupert was in fine form; doing the harder pinches wall problems on 2 fingers and pissing Malc's one armer. Also, he made a very casual repeat of Tumbleweed. Beast. bizarrely, the tor is still quite wet, despite it being dry for weeks. Where does it come from? (https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-5192158493985565115?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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kilnsey!! (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/04/kilnsey.html)
26 April 2010, 11:08 pm
it's not yet may and yet Kilnsey is dry which may not yet be usual. After a whole term of writing lectures I decided to drop my standards somewhat, and decided that writing Monday's lecture was monday's problem. For the first time this year that gave me two days free to climb at the weekend, and there's nothing I like better than a weekend climbing and camping at britain's premier limestone crag near a trout farm. kilnsey really does have it all; great routes, a good pub nearby, a beautiful campsite at the right price and the aforementioned trouty attraction. this weekend it had the added attraction of watching big malc on a tour de force, crushing everything beneath his mighty frame. that might be a slight exaggeration, but it was awesome to see him in action again. amongst the highlights were casual retro-flashes of biological need and zero option, and an almost-flash of massala martyr (he fell off the start, once). I missed his ascent of Indian Summer, but apparently it was sufficiently casual for onlookers to mistake it for a repeat of the ashes!amongst us lesser mortals, it was great to catch up with Rob Sutton, surely the inspiration for They Might Be Giant's "Triangle Man". picking himself up from his punishing schedule of raising two young kids and training for triathlons by cycling the 30 miles to work, he managed a good onsight of biological, and provided me with enough beta to scrape up a flash ascent by the skin of my teeth. rob obviously didn't find two days at kilnsey as tiring as his homelife, as he finished his weekend off by running to malham. he's good company, but he makes me feel very lazy...other highlights of the weekend include shunning britain's best bum doctor, starting his quest for fitness and thinness; and playing on Indian Summer. this is a great addition from steve dunning. I don't know why it isn't more popular; perhaps because it starts up sticky wicket, the world's gnarliest 7b...? anyway, I still have to work out a viable sequence on the headwall, but am looking forward to doing just that over the bank holiday. between now and then I have two whole evenings free to go to the tor! an unprecedented amount of free time for climbing. I am excited beyond belief, and especially looking forward to seeing if I can do "the" move on seraphim. hope springs eternal, after all...(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-1278348576522210417?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Shoulda, Woulda, Ondra (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/05/shoulda-woulda-ondra.html)
4 May 2010, 5:04 pm
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_03VgytvReXY/S-BT2gyXgpI/AAAAAAAAAFk/f7-JfD0nHH8/s320/IMG_3334.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_03VgytvReXY/S-BT2gyXgpI/AAAAAAAAAFk/f7-JfD0nHH8/s1600/IMG_3334.jpg) Adam Ondra onsighting Mandela - Credit: Ru Davies
“Greatness lies, not in being strong, but in the right using of strength.” - Henry Ward Beecher
This week and bank holiday weekend the British sport climbing scene was set alight by the visit of Adam Ondra to our finest two crags; Malham and Kilnsey. The internet forums are awash with rumours of his feats and claim and counter-claim are fizzing over the information superhighway. The bank holiday brought an opportunity to see the truth for ourselves and so, sure in the knowledge that Adam would be at Malham trying Overshadow, the wife and I headed to Kilnsey. Our plan for some time away from the circus was foiled though, as Adam sacked off the Malham route and headed for Kilnsey's North buttress; which has been left dry by some freak of nature which is obviously a precursor of impending apocalypse. This had one obvious drawback, as it meant no-one was interested in my paltry redpoint attempts on Massala Martyr. I am accustomed to being the main attraction at the crag, so clearly this was disgruntling. Nevertheless, for those still interested (Hi Mum!) I crushed with aplomb. A great little route this; and well worth seeking out. The top bulge seems to be shedding holds with alarming regularity though; best get in quick! Adam did nothing. Just worked the moves on some route over on the right hand side. Since Kilnsey was so cold on saturday, we headed to Malham on Sunday (are there more than two crags in Yorkshire?) The wife opened her account on Predator and I had a peek at the headwall of Victor Hugo. It's amazing to me that Jules is now working routes of the same standard that I am; even if her timescales for success might be slightly different, it's a testament to how far her climbing has progressed. More on that perhaps in another post. Victor is an extension to the standard warm-up Consenting Adults. Put up by Gaz Parry at 8b it's been repeated by Strong Steve and (as far as I know) no-one else. Rumour has it that Mick Lovatt has repeated it; can anyone confirm? The route climbs to the chains of Consenting, where a no-hands kneebar can be had for the short-legged. After that some powerful moves on large undercuts take you to a big hole full of bird-shit at the lip of the roof. Drop off here and you've enjoyed Pete Gomersall's "Thriller", 7c+. If you can crush a few more desperate moves on small crimps and cruise the easier headwall; that's Victor Hugo. I've been on it before but really struggled on the moves past the lip of the big roof, so I was really pleased to find that they now feel OK. On my first redpoint I did the hard first move and couldn't do the second. The second redpoint saw me through the hard moves by the absolute skin of my teeth as I wildly improvised through the crux, including a thumbs-only gaston move. Once on the easier headwall you shouldn't drop the route, so I was mortified when I got nervous, fumbled a clip and then grabbed the draw! I think I panicked a bit and wasn't thinking straight. That was the last go before it got dark, so at some point I've got to go and get back through the crux somehow, and then remind myself to calm down! Even the most stylishly dressed punters couldn't keep warm at Kilnsey this weekend
When Monday dawned it was one of those difficult days; too sunny for good conditions but with a stiff north wind that meant baltic conditions at the big K. Perhaps foolishly we opted for Kilnsey; maybe I was intentionally avoiding a rematch with Victor? Anyway, it was completely freezing and most people wisely opted not to climb. Rupert was there trying to warm up enough to tick Massalla Martyr; floating up to the last move and fumbling it each time. The last move is a really quick slap; perhaps it was too cold for quick movement? The Ondra machine rolled on. He'd ticked North Star (9a) on Sunday and made a quick redpoint of Northern Lights (9a) today. How did he keep warm? He even went up it in his T-shirt for photos! After ticking that, he had an onsight attempt at a dirty True North (8c) and very nearly made it. Heavily taped fingers prevented an onsight of Indian Summer but he did manage onsights of Ecstasy (which he downgraded) and Mandela, which hasn't been climbed since Kristian and Steve did it years ago and must be filthy. Apparently the holds are so big it doesn't matter; or doesn't if you are the best climber in the world, anyway. I was trying Indian Summer. Put up by one strong Steve and flashed by another, it has recently been repeated by Malcolm Smith and is a very underrated 8b+ with good climbing of increasing difficulty and some cool rests. Kind of like a harder 50 for 5... I'd had a couple of burns on it previously but was unable to work out a decent sequence for the last move from a big sidepull to a thin letterbox pocket. Thanks to the magic of facebook I am now equipped with a sequence for this section and manage to do the moves, but they feel really hard; how will I be able to do them from the ground, after 20 meters of 8a climbing? Amazingly, I nearly find out on my first redpoint of the day, cruising through the lower section and falling off with my fingers in the final letterbox slot; so close! The cold conditions really helped but it was so cold that none of my other goes came to anything and so once again no cigar. A cool weekend though; I came so close to ticking the kind of 8b's that would have been impossible for me a few years ago. It's so exciting to have made this sort of progress, and makes me hope that some of my long term goals in climbing are still possible. More importantly, it makes me think that the last six months of heavy training after work have been worthwhile after all. Can't wait for next weekend!!(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-1925739934130592564?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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The success of friends (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/05/success-of-friends.html)
9 May 2010, 7:53 pm
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_03VgytvReXY/S-cSylrwOfI/AAAAAAAAAF0/qQvAMmFBzsU/s400/IMG_3376.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_03VgytvReXY/S-cSylrwOfI/AAAAAAAAAF0/qQvAMmFBzsU/s1600/IMG_3376.jpg) 8B crusher, Ru Davies
A great weekend just gone. Given the relentless self-publicity that I seek through this blog, it will not surprise any of you that by nature I am quite a self obsessed individual. This weekend however events occurred that gave me that rare experience; genuine pleasure in the success of another. Ru Davies is one of my oldest climbing friends. We have been climbing together since my university days; long enough ago by now that I don't care to think about it. Ru is also one of the strongest climbers in Britain, surprisingly still true even though he holds down a very demanding job as a barrister. He's also one of the biggest under-acheivers on the peak scene, having never bouldered 8B; a feat achieved by many these days. Well no longer, for little Ru crushed Keen Roof at the Tor this Saturday. And crushed it with aplomb. No longer will Rupert sleep poorly at night, for he is an 8B climber, and will surely drink mead at the high table in Valhalla. I think he was a bit shocked to succeed this weekend, as he staggered about the Tor afterwards in a daze, struggling to come to terms which his awesome new found power. Anyway, it totally made my weekend to see him succeed; I hope he has similar success on some of his other yearly projects. On an unrelated note, it was heaving at the Tor this weekend. The entire length of the crag was draped with punters of various persuasions with some very strong individuals bearing down on the tiny tiny holds . More worryingly, the right-hand end of the crag was home to this dodgy young man; if you see him at the crag in future, do not approach him, but just call the relevant authorities at 1-800-DOBBIN-IS-A-FREAK... (https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-2471765451103180709?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Mandela (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/05/mandela.html)
19 May 2010, 9:43 pm
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_03VgytvReXY/S_RbfUuA1zI/AAAAAAAAAGE/DKTM5SH2ed0/s320/IMG_3443.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_03VgytvReXY/S_RbfUuA1zI/AAAAAAAAAGE/DKTM5SH2ed0/s1600/IMG_3443.jpg) Mark Leach making the first ascent of Mandela, in the days before heel hooks. Photo: Ian Horrocks
"Only a rope-length from the ground, it was like nothing one had ever experienced before." - Dave Nicol, Hard Rock.
Perched on a square foot of real estate; trying to block out both the wide plains of Wharfedale below and the oppressive heft of the roof above, the real meaning of these words hit home. And yet, this was familiar ground. There has been many times I've tentatively approached the main overhang at Kilnsey, only to lower off; shuddering and thinking of new excuses for my cowardice. The break looks wet. The in-situ gear is rotting away. In reality, they were only ever masks to hide the truth; that I was terrified by that massive, frozen bulk of limestone. I think Mandela has been one of my climbing ambitions from the day I first put toe to rock. Christmas, 1990, and I'm sat in bed wearing my brand new Joe Brown helmet (canary yellow, to match my lycra) and reading about Kilnsey Main Overhang in a pristine copy of Hard Rock. Summer, 1998, and I'm getting to grips with some of the harder sport routes at Kilnsey; glancing up at the overhang with a mixture of lust and trepidation. But mostly the latter. During the bank holiday I watched Adam Ondra onsight it with ease and realised it was time to slay the great grey whale. It was clean. It was dry. The in-situ draws were new. Time to go big, or go home. On Sunday myself, Bob Hickish and Dan Walker got to grips with Mandela. Bob equipped the roof with draws and worked a sequence. Dan went up and scrubbed the holds. Nothing left for me to do but try and flash the thing. The weight of 20 years of expectation compressed my fear until I was crouched below the roof, the panic welling in my mouth. Tense and crablike I crept up and out along the juggy break until I reached the first hard move at which point I snapped, yelled take, and sat on the bolt, whimpering. For the rest of the day I had redpoints which all failed at the crux moves; a technical rose move into a thin, back-three finger pocket halfway along the break. When Kristian Klemmow climbed Mandela he said it would be 7c+ if it were at ground level. That might not be too far wrong. Apart from these moves, and some slaps at the lip, the route climbs massive jugs and the whole roof is crossed in a surprisingly small number of moves. But the route is not at ground level and the exposure teases frayed nerves. I found it almost impossible to climb well; both the desire to achieve a childhood ambition, and the terrible position made a relaxed climbing style impossible. I wasn't going to do it that day. On Monday, I sat in my office and daydreamed about Mandela. At the end of the week I'm going to Chile. A work trip; three weeks. Would it still be dry when I returned? I couldn't leave it to chance. Bob was a student; he'd definitely be up for a mid-week raid. And so yesterday saw us back up on the roof. Up the directissima to warm up and straight into a redpoint. Relaxed now on the enormous holds; able to enjoy the situation. Watching the crows surf the updrafts below me. With a calmer mind I cruised to the crux and, feeling strong, easily reached the thin pocket. Disaster. Instead of the rose move I'd meant to do I had crossed over, and couldn't unwind. There was nothing to do but slump onto the rope. Things went from bad to worse; dogging the moves through the lip I find myself suddenly in space, watching the remains of the finishing jug plummet earthwards. A new, harder sequence has to be worked at the lip. I wonder if this will make a difference. It does. The next go I get through the crux, and find myself below the lip, a few moves from glory. Now I am at the lip, my head and torso into the vertical. Now my foot is over the lip and... No. Disaster again. I forget that both feet need to be over the lip before the finishing jug can be reached and am off again. With the rests at the top of the Directissima each redpoint is taking over an hour. I am running out of time. Third time works the charm. I am more tense than the goes before; feeling the pressure. My climbing is tight. Jerky. Still, I stagger through the crux moves, I lurch to the lip and thrutch my way over onto grassy holds and glory. The sudden change of angle is bewildering. Inspired by my success Bob nails it too, power-barking his way round the lip as the light fades over Wharfedale. I am still glowing; I have climbed Mandela. The route my gym teacher showed me, tauntingly, when I told him I was a rock climber. The reality lived up to my expectations in every way; it was intimidating and spectacular. I urge everyone to get on it, and get it done. The route is dry and clean and, though we've taken out most of the decaying fixed gear, it is easy to reverse and get your clips out once you're done. As for the grade, I think 8a+; it was surprisingly hard to link, and the lip moves are no longer as easy as they were once... It might be easier though; get on it and find out! (https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-8896395460831682157?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Living at the speed (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/07/living-at-speed.html)
7 July 2010, 1:34 pm
Forgive me Internet for I have sinned. It has been two months since my last confession. A pause in communication brought about by a month long Chile trip to use the telescopes in the Atacama desert. We had more rain than the UK did. Don't ask. Then I had exams to mark, with the pleasant surprise that the students did quite well. Must have been doing something right.
Since then it's been getting back into climbing. This is hard. I've been at this game for more than twenty years and I didn't have a clue for most of those. It's no surprise that my body is nearly 80% scar tissue. Therefore, after a long break all that scar tissue builds up and some sort of injury is totally inevitable.
No change this time either. A horribly jet-lagged session on Free Monster was enough to bring on a middle finger pulley tweak. The last few weeks have been about managing that before starting to train again. As a result I'm not ticking much, but ticking over, with an Anstey's cove trip to finish of Tuppence a particular highlight. I've nothing left to do down there but nasty link-ups, which is a relief; best mates John and Sheila are leaving Exeter for Nice, so I was hoping to replace Anstey's raids with trips to the South of France!
This week the training starts in earnest again; probably the hardest week's training I've ever done, and on the same week I turn 34. I'm not worried though; I've got a secret weapon...
Location:Brunswick St,,United Kingdom (http://maps.google.com/maps?q=Brunswick%20St,,United%20Kingdom@53.380613,-1.486512&z=10)(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-1966366612198535328?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Damages (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/07/damages.html)
13 July 2010, 12:04 am
Can't sleep tonight and I've finished watching the Green Zone and Serenity (again); so a late night post seemed apposite.
Turns out I didn't completely survive last weeks sessions, even with assistance from deep heat. On the last circuit of the last night something went crunch in my stomach and breathing, moving around and sneezing got really painful. The diagnosis is a torn/pulled intercostal muscle, but it seems to be healing quick so no worries there.
Saturday we got rained off from Chapel Head Scar. We went there 'cos the otherwise excellent northern limestone guide told us it'd be ok in heavy rain. Erm, nope. So we salvaged the afternoon by paying Ru a visit in his new house. Turns out he lives in dingly dell in a fairy tale cottage. No campus board up yet though.
On Sunday, the day of rest, we join the rest of the English speaking world at the cheedale cornice. Are climbers tribal, sheep-like or just unimaginative? Anyway, the world is there. The Hamer brothers representing the young blood and looking strong, as always, whilst the old guard is there in force. 90's legends like Seb Grieve, 7b+ Welford and Robin 'rolypoint' Barker are there lapping the 7s. Ru, Jon Fullwod and myself make up the in-betweeners. Jon is on Monumental Armblaster which seems quite hard now after hold loss. I am reminding myself that I can't climb slabs on Unleashing the Wild Physique and Ru shuffles off round the corner to onsight the Lockless Monster. He doesn't seem too happy though; I guess he thinks it's soft but the reality is probably just that he's a beast. Crap at plumbing though.
More training this week, if I'm allowed. I have a physio appointment tomorrow to see if I'm doing lasting damage to my chest by climbing. I hope not, as I need to get fit and fast. DWS season is nearly upon us...
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Dry Spell (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/07/dry-spell.html)
18 July 2010, 8:56 pm
I can't seem to climb for shit at the moment.
Since returning from Chile my climbing performance has been showing solid and steady progress. Unfortunately it's all been downhill! My body is falling apart, showing a startling amount of synchronicity with my 34th birthday. The list at time of writing consists of pulled stomach muscles, three fingers showing tweaks of various levels of seriousness and a very sore wrist which the physio thinks might need surgery.
Unsurprisingly confidence levels are dropping in step with performance levels so I was hoping for a step up this weekend to get this dry spell over and done with. No joy; the only downpours have been meteorological. On Saturday I went to the Cornice (Cheedale) and fell off Monumental. Flipping brilliant route. On Sunday I went to the Cornice (WCJ) and fell off Rumble in the Jungle (brilliant route) and Yorkshire 8b (crap route). Also, I managed to fall off Brachiation Dance during my warm down. That's a lot of falling off. By contrast I saw Neil Dyer both days, who was very impressive, crushing Monumental on Saturday and nearly flashing Unleashing the Wild Physique. He looks to be fully on a roll; I am well jealous!
If my climbing state of mind is depressed, it seems as naught compared to my general mood about the direction we are heading in. The coalition government has embraced 'austerity' with open arms and is bearing down full-bore on the budget deficit. Quite rightly in my view. However, as predicted, public spending is bearing the brunt of the load, with the balance between spending cuts and tax rises being roughly 4:1. It's hard not to feel that the coalition government is letting ideology, as opposed to sound economic reasoning, be their guide in these decisions, and I'm appalled by the prospects of what 25% cuts will do to my home turf of Universities and Science funding.
Everyone considers the Thatcher government to be a paragon of cold-hearted axe-wielding. Faced with a gently recovering economy but massive public discontent with the direction the country was heading, Thatcher too undertook a deficit reduction program. The period is remembered with some horror by many people who lived in the industrial north but even Thatcher's plans only had 2:1 ratio between spending cuts and tax rises. In fact, I don't think we've ever faced such a dramatic cut-back in the size of the state in modern history.
Still, we all know that New Labour was profligate, pouring vast unaffordable sums of money into the public sector. Worst of all, it is a standard trope that much of that money was wasted. After all, take the NHS; all that money seemed to go into cosy salaries for GPs and layers of bureaucracy. It's no surprise the public sector is so horribly inefficient, is it? Surely massive cuts to public spending could be a good thing. Won't the good old private sector handle things more efficiently and deliver some sorely-needed efficiency reforms?
Well, no, I don't think so. You think the NHS is bloated and inefficient? Not so (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/10375877): even after all that wasteful New Labour spending, the Commonwealth Fund still found it to be the most efficient Health Service out of the seven it looked at, including Germany, USA, Canada, New Zealand - all of which have a larger role played by the private sector. The idea that the Health Service (and by extension the whole public sector) is bloated by nature seems totally unproven to me, and I have a terrible depressing feeling that the coalition government is going to embark on a massive series of cuts, re-organisations and private sector initiatives only to find that in areas from health care to education we're going to get an awful lot less service, for a bit less money.
Enjoy your Monday.
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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In Brine (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/07/in-brine.html)
25 July 2010, 7:16 pm
The morose post before this one invited a certain amount of comments from my fans, for which I'm always grateful. Britain's best bum doctor suggested that trying to mix hard training and hard climbing was trying to have my cake and eat it. He should know, because he's medically trained. Nevertheless, what's the point of having cake unless you're going to eat it? Meanwhile, purely by chance, Dave Mac posted on his blog that "there's nothing worse than moaning blogs...". And he's right; I hate whiners, and happy blogs are much nicer to read. Like that nice chap Ben Morton. Over on the Blog of Dob he's got a funny post about how women really want a Gok Norris, but often get a Chuck Wang. It's better than I make it sound.
So I'm going to be more happy, which isn't hard because I've just had one of those fucking brilliant weekends that split your face from ear to ear. Anyone who knows anything knows that it's ALL just training for deep water soloing, and this weekend was a chance to put all that training into action. Great weather, great company and plenty of salty warm water to fall into; what more can anyone ask for?
Specifics are needed; this weekend I hit the south coast along with a group of reprobates from my Exeter days. Sutton and Happy have the enthusiasm (and energy) of a Labrador puppy; Fat Will isn't but is a laid back cheerful counterweight. Then there's the infinitely mellow Jules V and Theo; an incorrigible pervert with enough charisma to get away with it. Think Jerry Moffat meets the sex offenders register.
All in all the team brought more testosterone than a gender re-alignment clinic so it's little surprise that the wife sat this one out. First port of call was Lulworth, where we met South Coast legend Gav Symmonds for some briny fun. I think Lulworth is the best place on earth; nowhere else combines swinging around footless on jugs with a soft, salty landing and a nearby cafe and ice cream shop. Perfect. With such a psyched team it was all going off; Rob Sutton made the first(?) solo of Never Kneel to Skeletor, Gav did Pump up the Beast and I managed a slimy ascent of Adrenochrome. The rest of the lads provided much entertainment by hurling themselves like lemmings at the area classic 'Mark of the Beast' with varying degrees of success. Nearly everyone got wet, with some spectacular faceplants into the ocean from the top of the cliff. As good as DWS gets, I reckon. All rounded off with dinner in a beautiful old pub near Langton Matravers, which serves the best Ginger sponge pudding on the planet; or at least those bits of the planet that I have both visited, and bought Ginger sponge pudding in.
Understandably after a day like that, Sunday was a bit more mellow, and we all went to Connor Cove to bask in the sun and tick a few more classics. It wasn't all mellow though; most people managed to fall or jump from near the top, and Theo pulled out a masterful and improbable ascent of the very hard "Herman Borg's Basic Pulley Slippage" which seemed to consist of power screams and more footless moves than seems prudent for a slab climb.
That done, it was time for everyone to go their separate ways again, back to wives, kids, jobs and other things which aren't climbing above the sea. As we all make our way home, I can bet that everyone has the same thought running through their heads; how soon can I get back?
Location:Banbury,United Kingdom (http://maps.google.com/maps?q=Banbury,United%20Kingdom@52.082667,-1.347108&z=10)(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-3931839445175457379?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Germs, Grades and Shoes (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/08/germs-grades-and-shoes.html)
1 August 2010, 9:03 pm
Disclaimer: massive post this week, and with no point whatsoever. Feel free to skip to the last paragraph, where the controversy is.
I was really looking forward to this week; I was going to take a couple of days off to climb in Wales with the missus and was massively psyched to visit LPT as there's quite a few routes of (just about) onsightable standard there. I'm running out of routes around the 7c+/8a level in the UK that I haven't already blown the onsight on, so anticipation was high and I was making and re-making lists of projects to have a crack at.
Sadly, the best laid plans of mice and midgets gang aft gan agley. Agley'ing us this time was a nasty little virus. As usual this struck the wife down viciously whilst I was relatively unaffected. Neither of us were going to be tearing it up though, so we came home after a day's pootling on the boulders in the pass.
The trip wasn't a total washout, however, as I bought a pair of Sportiva Miura Velcros (http://www.v12outdoor.com/catalog/product_info.php?cPath=168&products_id=2165&oscsid=56199d0ca3d820f98e9b3f9c4b159545). I'm quite fetishistic about my climbing shoes. In fact, I'm the Imelda Marcos of climbing. I certainly own more climbing shoes than you. Probably. After all, what other piece of climbing gear can give you half a grade's performance for a week's pay packet? And these shoes are, hands-down, the best pair of climbing shoes I've ever owned. They feel foot-shaped, as opposed to my five-tens which are very much not foot-shaped, unless the foot in question belongs to a duck-billed platypus. I've put up with Five Ten's odd toe boxes because I used to think that no rubber could match stealth, especially on the horribly polished limestone of my favourite crags. How happy I am that the Miura's have proved me wrong. I think I'm a sportiva man from now on, despite the horrible, horrible £120 price tag.
This weekend I have been unleashing my fantastic new shoes on Kilnsey and the Tor. On Saturday I returned to Indian Summer, with the hope of finishing it off, but failed even to get back to the crux. I was exhausted just getting through the bottom 7b section. I'm blaming residual sickness and poor conditions, unless anyone has any better ideas? The Tor on Sunday was fun. Spent the day with Rupert, trying Ru's own Seraphim, and Revelations. Still nowhere on both routes as both feature spectacularly tough moves which I can't figure out at all. Revelations in particular must be all of font 7c+ on the crux, and there are people who insist it is only 8a+. What are they on? I have never done the crux move, but Paul Reeve has, and in fact can do it with ease. Which brings us to the controversy.
At the start of this year, Paul Reeve ticked Unjustified (8c), along with two of his foundry compatriates. This is an amazing display of determination and grit, particularly as it was done on two disintegrating elbows. Then a week ago I saw a certain someone refer to an ascent of an 8b+ at Kilnsey as the 'hardest ascent this year on Yorkshire Limestone'. This comment comes amongst the background of mutterings that the route is overgraded. I have to say, these mutterings have made me a tiny bit annoyed. Annoyed because I don't know anyone who's actually done the route and suggested a downgrade. The mutterings seem to have arisen because the route had four pretty quick ascents this year, by some dark horses (and Paul). Anyway, I just wanted to remind the mutterers that the repeaters of this route are complete beasts, who can do the crux move on Revelations, amongst other things. So repeat the route, or stop muttering. Pretty please?(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-8685985641693430604?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Disclaimer: massive post this week, and with no point whatsoever. Feel free to skip to the last paragraph, where the controversy is.
a week ago I saw a certain someone refer to an ascent of an 8b+ at Kilnsey as the 'hardest ascent this year on Yorkshire Limestone'. This comment comes amongst the background of mutterings that the route is overgraded. I have to say, these mutterings have made me a tiny bit annoyed. So repeat the route, or stop muttering. Pretty please?(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-8685985641693430604?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
I have to apologise unreservedly for that Stu. It wasn't actually a deliberately inflamatory comment, although I can now see how you could interpret it that way (thanks to the Stallion) - I had actually meant it as positive praise for what I believed to be a significant Yakshur ascent - similar to me back-slapping your ascent of Unjustified (which I, as Priscilla, correctly identified as an 8c.)
An aging has-been sport climber seems to have logged another 8c recently. 6th ascent? - After Mitchell, Malc Smith, Steve Mac, Gaz Parry and God apparently. ;D
I hadn't remembered the ascents of Unjustified as I asked:
I know this won't appeal to many, but I'm impressed by Paul Smitton repeating Dalliance at Kilnsey - I don't think it's had many ascents with the true finish, and I think he's been trying it a fair bit. Hardest ascent so far this year in Yakshir anyone? :thumbsup:
I'd love to repeat it, yet I've got a lot of easier route experience to gain first, and as a serial overgrader, I'll be taking 8c for it!
I'll not be box-hopping again anytime soon,
Apologies again,
Andy.
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Andy, thanks for the post!
I had assumed that you were being sly in your post, so cheers for the clarification. The blog post wasn't really aimed at you specifically though; I've heard a lot of people question the grade of Unjustified and it's symptomatic of a trend which I find a bit weird amongst climbers.
Most of the downgrade suggestions for Unjustified came after Paul climbed it. It seems as a group we are incredibly quick to suggest a downgrade for a route when it's climbed by a climber who raises his game significantly to make the ascent. My blog post really came about because I had a really hard time on Revelations and it reminded me what a beast Paul actually is. After all, we're talking about someone who can almost lap Mecca, and warmed down from redpoints on the power 8b's at Malham with nonchalant top-ropes of GBH. When a guy like that climbs 8c it shouldn't be such a surprise.
Anyway, cheers again for the clarification; we're all friends now. And I'm sure you could tick Unjustified. After all, it's only 8b+ :whistle:
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Germs, Grades and Shoes (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/08/germs-grades-and-shoes.html)
I was really looking forward to this week; I was going to take a couple of days off to climb in Wales with the missus and was massively psyched to visit LPT as there's quite a few routes of (just about) onsightable standard there. I'm running out of routes around the 7c+/8a level in the UK that I haven't already blown the onsight on, so anticipation was high and I was making and re-making lists of projects to have a crack at.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
Let me know if you make it back over Stu, you might find this graded list useful when planning your onsight onslaught:
Easiest First:
Martha 7c
Rompsville 7c
Bad Boy
Battle of the Parasites 7c+ (prob not a good onsight though, clips are hard to get in)
Fair Sized Fish
Mussel Beach 8a
Over the Moon Direct
Parasite
Battle of the Little Big Orme (once again nails onsight due to clips)
Statement of Youth
Over the Moon (the hardest 8a due to the top crack)
Moonwalk 8a+
Wild Understatement
Melon Beach
Pas de Deux
And don't forget its nearly Diamond time!
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Brilliant. I shall start at the top and work down!
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Tor. Huh. What is it good for? (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/08/tor-huh-what-is-it-good-for.html)
4 August 2010, 10:07 pm
It's good for just about blinking everything. Back to the best crag in the world again for another failure session on Revelations. I am convinced this is the hardest move ever climbed by humans. Am convincing myself I'm making incremental progress, but it's hard to say as it boils down to whether I manage to stay in contact with the hold for 3 or 4 microseconds. What an amazing route though.
It was a good scene at the Tor today, with Ed, Dylan, Dobbin and Nedwin van Feehally all present and correct. Dobbin is doing well on Mecca; much better than he thinks he is. His redpoints nearly take him into the groove, a point at which most aspirants start to dream of success. He needs to believe he's up to the route (which he is) and take the time to become comfortable with climbing and falling off the top groove. If he spends some time getting happy with the idea of falling, he'll do it for sure. Ned also plays on Mecca, but looks bored by the sheer number of moves; a boulderer's boulderer! Nevertheless he works out some sort of sequence. Ned - if you read this, this video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gICj6ulVs40) shows Smitton milking the kneebar! Then he gets on Hubble and looks strong; nearly busting out three of the six moves on his first go up. This is actually a fierce effort and I inform him of this, but he looks sceptical. I would love to be strong enough for Hubble, but I fear there is one move (the last) which will always elude me. Shame.
The downside of trying revelations is that falling off the second move again and again doesn't leave you feeling sated. So to get a burn at the end of the day I climb Revelations from the third move in, strip it and try Mecca without resting; desperate! The groove is in really smeggy condition and I realise what a good effort the boys have been putting in. I will consider myself fit when I can lap this route; I'm about a year off this I reckon.
Go home thinking how brilliant the Tor is. There are so many good moves here, and so much history. I just love it.
p.s my sportivas are still brilliant.
Location:Hammerton Rd,,United Kingdom (http://maps.google.com/maps?q=Hammerton%20Rd,,United%20Kingdom@53.397833,-1.498222&z=10)(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-6529016867271613299?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Most of the downgrade suggestions for Unjustified came after Paul climbed it. It seems as a group we are incredibly quick to suggest a downgrade for a route when it's climbed by a climber who raises his game significantly to make the ascent. My blog post really came about because I had a really hard time on Revelations and it reminded me what a beast Paul actually is. After all, we're talking about someone who can almost lap Mecca, and warmed down from redpoints on the power 8b's at Malham with nonchalant top-ropes of GBH. When a guy like that climbs 8c it shouldn't be such a surprise.
I think you are overstating the case. It was always mooted that Cry Freedom (graded 8b+) was a harder proposition than Unjustified. In your blog post from October last year (before Paul's ascent) even you said: " Unjustified has a reputation as being very soft for the grade, and the grade math backs this up; it's probably 7b+/c to the big undercuts underneath the roof, and maybe 8a to the top from here. That shouldn't add up to 8c, but I think it does."
The fact that Dan, Rob and Paul and Adam Jeworth? do it in fairly quickly as their first 8c's has lent further weight to the already existing impression of it being at least a soft touch if not 8b+. I don't think this is an unreasonable or unfair shift of armchair opinion on the route given a range of evidence which includes Paul but does not single him out.
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The Age of Vice (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/08/age-of-vice.html)
9 August 2010, 11:28 am
Rupert loves Cheedale. So we went there.
Saturday. Breezy, cool, humid.
Venue: Two Tier
Nearly a massive angry rant day as my trick wrist was feeling very sore and I was getting box-pumped on 6b's when warming up. Plus I couldn't do any of the moves on my route. Rupert turns up and saves the day with beta and levity. Seven years ago, Rupert crimped his way up an old Gav Ellis project to give one of the best 8b's in the peak. From time to time he reminds me that I haven't done it and I come up with a variety of excuses to mask the fact that this is because it looks too thin, and too hard. Today I run out of excuses and MTFU.
It's interesting for Ru to see what's become of his project. Intermediates have been found and brushed up. The sequence has been refined; removing five hard moves. Finally, the addition of a belay to the right has meant the hard climbing finishes a couple of moves earlier on a big jug. The modern Kali Yuga aspirant faces a much softer challenge than Rupert. Such is the lonely fate of the first ascentionist. The moves are still hard and at the limit of my crimping tolerance so Rupert's beta is essential and allows me to shake like a shitting dog to the chains. I am pleased to tick, Rupert enjoys seeing me do his route. Everyone is happy. We go back to Rupert's gaffe in dingley dell where I spend the night trying to ignore Ru's kittens, which are sat on my pillow, purring constantly and farting occasionally.
Sunday. Cool then Hot. Still.
Venue: The Nook
Rupert still loves Cheedale, so we return on Sunday, but not before Sarah fuels us up with tea, toast and apple muffins. The Davies' appear to have reached a level of domestic happiness that our household lacks. Suitably alerted to this fact, I shall attempt to persuade my wife to make muffins for me in the morning. I predict this will meet with failure. I have never climbed on the Nook, because it's too far to walk, always wet and usually has decaying animal matter underneath it. It is now dry and free from the stench of death, but I still moan to Rupert about the walk in, which has not improved, sadly. We aim to do old-skool boulder/route classic, Theoria. Theoria is a route from John Hart, who was everyone's favourite old warrior until Keith stole his crown. It is short, steep and slappy. I am very excited.
Rupert and I display all the professionalism we have learnt from 15 years sport climbing. We attempt to pre-equip the route and succeed in getting two and a half clips in, and the clipstick stuck. Some inelegant rope-work and a bit of thrutching fix this problem, with the added benefit of showering Rupert with a good covering of Cheedale dirt. Rupert and I both express relief that Adam Long wasn't here to witness all this chicanery, and agree that it's a good job we don't try many big walls in Patagonia. With the route clean and equipped I fully fail to work out any of the moves and send Rupert up to sort things out. He fares slightly better and a sequence of sorts is cobbled together. In the meantime, Gus and Sam pop over to the Nook, in a very shabby state from the night before. Banter ensues and Sam crushes Lockless in about 0.3 seconds, after which they leave us to our thoughts. Rupert wants to know why I'm not as entertaining as Sam. This makes me angry enough to tick the route. I warm down by also crushing Lockless, just to show Sam who's boss. Admittedly he'd left by then, but maybe he'll read this and gracefully accept my mastery in the comments section?
All in all, a good weekend. A bit like the good old days, but with more arthritis.(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-8655178248002528823?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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it's just banger after banger from Mr Stupert Littledavies.
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in the current state of my relationship I would like to try one day, to ask my g/f to make me muffins before I go climbing.
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Training with Fatxi (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/08/training-with-fatxi.html)
9 August 2010, 9:12 pm
(http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/10/08/09/s_1772.jpg) (http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/10/08/09/1772.jpg)
After finally ticking a few routes at the weekend, it's time to start the hard training again. Monday night is campus night so I pootled down the works to take advantage of their massive campus board.
Dobbin was in his customary position under the beastmaker board. I've taken to calling him Fatxi because he's got a Patxi-style weight vest, isn't as thin as Patxi but there is a faint resemblance there (not in climbing ability, obviously). Sadly, this appears to have gone to his head, as he is now sporting a Patxi-style haircut (see above). Since reading the bible as a child I'm a firm believer in the strength giving properties of hair. Time will tell if Fatxi's new do gives him a grade...
On the subject of campussing, Ru showed me an old Gresham article discussing the future of climbing, and the likely influence of the Nürnberg Lat Board, as people were calling it then. Gresham hinted at rumours that Wolfgang was close to a one-arm campus move. Such a feat (Gresham wrote) would surely be 9a. I reckon this is the only way I'm ever climbing 9a, so I'm taking the tick. Unfortunately, I couldn't find "pointless showboating" using 8a.nu's "search and add" feature, so I can't put it on my scorecard. Shame.
(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-8247087481466708251?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Keep it up Stu..... :thumbsup:
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Yes, what FD said. It is my impression that some people (eg stu or Dobbin or Lore) must spend hours writing these. Please don't tell me you just dash them off between reps.
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It's worse than that Grimes; I don't even get off the fingerboard. Just type with one hand man...
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You mean some people type with two?
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I monotype. Using any more than one finger dilutes training benefit.
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Injured party (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/08/injured-party.html)
19 August 2010, 9:58 pm
An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made in a very narrow field. ~Niels Bohr
People frequently ask me advice about injuries. How to treat them, what they've done to themselves. I can understand that; if you want to avoid mistakes, talk to a man who's made them all.
The best advice I ever got about injuries, I completely ignored. My first injury was an impinged shoulder, suffered whilst belaying, of all things. My guru at the time, the dark horse himself Tim Clifford, safely advised me that injury was inevitable and the only path to success was to learn how to manage them by climbing through them. I totally ignored his advice and took what I thought was the prudent action of a months rest. It was a disaster; when I came back to climbing my shoulder was no better and all my fingers hurt. They haven't stopped hurting since!
It's pretty much essential to climb as much as you can on injured tendons; scar tissue needs load to grow properly. Rest instead, and the scar tissue will build up into knotty lumps that catch and inflame. A lot of people don't believe this advice, and I always see examples of people being too careful with injuries; it never works out.
These days I try to climb as much as prudent on an injury. The catch, of course, is knowing how much is prudent. If it gets better, you did it right. If it gets worse, try again!
One injury that's been worrying me a lot this year is my right wrist, which became sore after a layoff over Christmas. Pretty sure it was the usual problem of scar tissue build up I've continued climbing and done plenty of massage, ice and stretching, but the wrist has not improved. Last month my physio suggested it could be cartilage damage, and my only options were to live with it, or risky surgery. I didn't like the sound of that, so I sought a second opinion. The second physio agrees with me; a loss of movement caused by scar tissue buildup, and has begun a campaign of brutalising my wrist until it starts moving properly again. I like that diagnosis better, and hope to see improvement over the next few weeks.
If it clears up, the first thing on my hitlist is Sean's Roof; this video of it on the beastmaker blog makes it look absolutely brilliant (and has cemented Leo Moger's reputation as the strongest beast in beaston).
Location:Hammerton Rd,,United Kingdom (http://ukbouldering.com/board/'http://maps.google.com/maps?qHammerton%20Rd,,United%20Kingdom%4053.398029%2C-1.498280&z10')(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-2828717870722649561?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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(I do like) Mondays (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/08/i-do-like-mondays.html)
23 August 2010, 10:17 pm
Monday night is campus night! Which means it's off to the works to use the "biggest campus board in the world". Fatxi is back after a week off to go surfing - his shoulders look huge and he is crushing the motherboard. All that paddling must be good for you. Monday is also gun-day, which means team bicep, Sam and Gus are in the middle of their campus board-based endurance workout from Hades. Think over 500 moves squeezed into around half an hour with some deadhanging and pull ups thrown in after for good measure. At the end of it, Sam's forearms look like the Hindenberg, and are actually bigger than his considerable biceps. Savage.
I had a great campus session, and an even better day at Kilnsey on Sunday. I was trying Ecstasy, which is steep and brilliant, but felt very hard to me. I couldn't get through the crux from the ground, which is a big throw to a jug off a poor undercut and bad feet. Adam '8c' Jeeworth (sp?) was there, and crushed it first go of the day; is he the most cheerful 8c climber in Britain? Certainly, a breath of fresh air and a nice guy to share a route with. Now the sad news for Kilnsey fans; lots of rain has meant that the big umbrella has started to leak a bit. The start of ecstasy and the bulge was nigh on unclimbable by the time we left, and the North Buttress looked in a bit of a state. Hopefully, things will clear up again by the weekend, and I can sort my ecstasy problem out once and for all...
Location:Hammerton Rd,,United Kingdom (http://maps.google.com/maps?q=Hammerton%20Rd,,United%20Kingdom@53.397834,-1.498156&z=10)(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-1008344454384218354?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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And, we're back (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/12/and-were-back.html)
14 December 2010, 10:09 pm
Thank god that's over with. Like most people, I had a little chuckle when the queen described her annus horribilis (http://www.blogger.com/post-edit.g?blogID=7729231372129649725&postID=9091159534839347936). Not any more. Suffice it to say that I've been far too busy writing lectures, giving lectures, fixing telescopes, training and trying to climb to keep you entertained with my erudite outpourings of wit. I'm sure you've coped, somehow.
One of the things I've been mulling over whilst I've been incommunicado is an issue of self-awareness. I'm sure we all meet dicks from time to time. However, I assume that most dicks don't know they're dicks. Which raises the interesting question of how to tell if you're a dick. Is there some objective test of dick-ness? Some set of hard criteria against which you can measure how much of a dick you are, so to speak.
One trait all dicks seem to have in common is that they don't seem to think other people matter as much as they do. If you think that you're more important than the people around you, it's hard to understand why you shouldn't get special treatment. That guy who thinks he should get to the front of a traffic jam by caning it down the outside lane. He's a dick.
Also, dicks seem to think that everyone else is an idiot. The spuming, ranting fool on the Internet who can't accept you have a different point of view. He's a dick, because he assumes you're stupid, just because you don't have the good sense to agree with him entirely about absolutely everything.
So dicks think they're more important than the people around them, and everyone else is a moron. There's only two problems with that. The first is that, based on those criteria, I don't come out half as well as I'd like. The second is that what if, objectively you are more important and more intelligent than people around you. Does that make you a dick?
One person who is definitely not a dick is Ned Feehally. Lovely chap, total beast. Here he is introducing me to the genius idea of warming up on a fingerboard.
Brilliant idea; the same warm up every time and without trashing your skin! One of the reasons Jerry Moffatt is such a legend is his professionalism. WWJD is a great mantra for the aspiring hero. Jerry would never go on a Spanish sport climbing trip without training stamina. Jerry would make sure he had great skin to try his project. The only problem is that, since Jerry stopped climbing, we can add no more top tips from the tip-top to our list. Perhaps it's time to find a new paragon of professionalism? If so, I suggest Ned.
WWND? He'd probably have stopped writing pages ago.
Location:Hammerton Rd,,United Kingdom (http://maps.google.com/maps?q=Hammerton%20Rd,,United%20Kingdom@53.397832,-1.498282&z=10)(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-9091159534839347936?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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I'm a right dick.
Team America Dicks pussys and assholes throwing up bit (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6jHIT88IbE&feature=related#ws)
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Dick
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I'm gonna add childish amusement about saying 'dick', to the list of dick characteristics.
You dicks
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An Xmas break in pictures (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/01/xmas-break-in-pictures.html)
6 January 2011, 11:23 pm
Ahh, Christmas. The joy of giving, the winter sun holiday and the relentless tide of marketing.
(http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/s_3206.jpg) (http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/3206.jpg)
There was plenty of the latter at the "winter experience"; a park just outside Wetherby where we took my nephew Alex just before Xmas. Ice skating, big wheel, snowflake maze and cafe/shop. The winter experience has it all, and for the pittance of £15 a head you can enjoy all the above, plus the Nordic ski trail around the Enchanted Forest. Here you'll find animatronic raindeer, lit by fairy lights, stooping to drink from a frozen lake. I loved it!
(http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/s_3209.jpg) (http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/3209.jpg)
Christmas was spent at home, opening presents and getting fat. This year was a little sad, as my sister couldn't make it back from her home in Mexico. Still, it was lovely to spend time with the family and see them enjoying their gifts. My Dad got particularly lucky this year, as Santa brought him a Canon 400mm lens. I couldn't resist borrowing it for a few shots, and now have serious lens envy!
(http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/s_3210.jpg) (http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/3210.jpg)
(http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/s_3211.jpg) (http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/3211.jpg)
Usually I weigh myself before and after Xmas dinner each year; after a heavy meal the difference can be nearly a stone! This year I refrained from the scales. I took it pretty easy at dinner though, probably because I was psyched for the winter break...
This year, we're splitting our trip between Barcelona and Siurana. The Barcelona part was a treat for surviving a difficult year; we stayed in a posh hotel in the city centre and combined rest days sightseeing with days climbing at Monserrat. The climbing was a bit of a disaster as I pulled a tendon on my second day, so am now in full rehab mode. The sightseeing was more successful though. Barcelona is my favourite city and is lovely now as they are gearing up for their big Xmas festival, the day of the Kings, on the 6th Jan. Here are some shots of the city.
(http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/s_3213.jpg) (http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/3213.jpg)
(http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/s_3215.jpg) (http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/3215.jpg)
(http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/s_3217.jpg) (http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/3217.jpg)
(http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/s_3218.jpg) (http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/3218.jpg)
Finally, we have come to Siurana, for Jules to crush and me to take it easy. Taking a tip from Dave McCleod, I've been climbing as hard as my finger will take; taking care to stay open handed at all times. Thankfully the finger can take a lot of strain in that position, although it's very sore in a half-crimp. The steep pockets at Margalef are just what the doctor ordered, thank god.
We are staying at Cal Giral 2 in Cornudella; a good option for those with cash to splash. Friendly, comfortable and a nice breakfast of fresh pastries each morning. Heartily recommended; and the view from our balcony is stunning...
(http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/s_3220.jpg) (http://blogpress.w18.net/photos/11/01/06/3220.jpg)
(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-2972362859999174622?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Back at the saddle (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/01/back-at-saddle.html)
10 January 2011, 3:09 am
It's a clever pun, see. The title. I'm back at La Silla, the observatory in Chile where I've been doing most of my research over the last few years. La Silla means 'The Saddle'. Back at the saddle. See what I did? Never mind.
At this time of year, La Silla is a beautiful place to be. The weather is still and warm enough for shorts and a t-shirt and I spend my afternoons sat in the courtyard outside the dining hall watching the birds and listening to the quiet burble of the fountain. And eating ice cream. The nights are short, the days are long and leisurely, the view stunning. Basically, it's a bit of a joy, especially compared to winter, when there's no time to do anything other than work, and sleep.
That chap above is the NTT; the anachronously named New Technology Telescope, commissioned in 1989, and my own personal toy for the next few weeks. I'm actually out doing the donkey work (arf!) for other people's research projects, so I'm doing a pretty wide range of science out here. We're trying an ambitious project to try and tell the difference in brightness between the day and night side of a planet around a distant star. Pretty cool, but I think we've two chances of success, Jack and Shit. And Jack's left town. Meanwhile, I've been using the dark nights to try my hand at astrophotography again. The first image below is the nearby galaxy the Small Magellanic Cloud (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Small_Magellanic_Cloud). You can see the globular cluster (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Globular_cluster) 47 Tuc below it, too. The bottom image is the Coal Sack (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coal_Sack); a cloud of dust and gas which appears dark as it blocks the background light from stars in our own galaxy....
It's good to have some work to do, 'cos it is distracting me from being upset about my injured finger. The last few days of our spanish holiday were dominated by me nursing the finger on the juggy pockets at Margalef. As is often the case with injuries, it could withstand quite a lot of load fully open handed and I had a nice few days ticking some nice 8a's at Cova Soleida, which I think is less frequented than other Margalef crags, but has some stunning routes following leaning cracklines. In fact, the finger dealt with Margalef so well, I was beginning to forget it was injured, but a day on the crimpfests at Siurana soon reminded me that it's going to take a lot of rehab when I get back to the UK. Never mind, I'll just keep looking at the pretty pictures...(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-2430705266805250169?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Double Bum (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/01/double-bum.html)
11 January 2011, 1:14 am
You'd better like that photo, because it involved a lot of pain to take. That's a Vizcacha (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viscacha) right there, a relative of the Chinchilla and native to South America. They look a bit like a cross between a rabbit and a squirrel who's had too many nuts.
See that rock it's stood on; looks unstable doesn't it? Looks like the sort of treacherous rock that might shift under an unsuspecting chap, pitching him headlong down the slope, his expensive camera and lens banging along behind him like an over-enthusiastic puppy. Well, if that's what you're thinking, then you'd be right, except it wasn't that particular rock, but one much like it. Miraculously my camera and lens survived with only (fairly major) cosmetic damage. If only I could say the same for me; my legs are pretty bashed up and my finger is the size of a watermelon. I think I bent my finger back trying to stop my fall, and it got crushed under the rocks that were pitching down the slope with me. It hurts a lot. If I had to guess, I'd say I've sprained the collateral ligaments pretty badly. Hurts more than any climbing injury I've ever had and I've almost totally lost mobility in it. At least it's on the same hand as my other injured finger.
Something tells me this years season is going to have a pretty slow start....(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-8435933273011460864?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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A slow start (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/05/slow-start.html)
17 May 2011, 1:57 pm
Told you so.
That last blog post was months and months ago now, and very little of significance has occurred since then. I did a lot of physio to heal my wounds and a lot of work to heal my publication record. Success on both counts.
I had a fortnight in France. The Cote D'Azur in Nice, where there are a lot of very nice crags which are mostly wet. It was here that I came to realise how stressed the last two years of work have made me, when my head collapsed in spectacular fashion, leaving me unable to toprope 6c's without a hissy fit. Fortunately, two weeks in the sun was exactly what I needed.
Now I feel like I'm back, in more ways than one. I'm back to training; the injuries clear enough to try hard and want to try harder. I'm back ticking, with success on a whole route at Malham this weekend. The blog is back. My psyche is back. Oh yes, the last one gives me the most pleasure. If I'm honest, there have been times when all climbing has felt like a chore over the last few months. Today I find myself surfing the internet for climbing news. Googling for pictures of potential projects. Watching movies on Vimeo and You Tube. In short, doing many things which are not work.
I am psyched out of my tiny little mind.
(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-8447767345044986497?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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YHM
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Fuck yeah! :bounce:
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:2thumbsup:
Its good to hear its come back. This year I've barely done any climbing and my head has suffered from the stress of work. As of the 26th I'm hoping to be less highly strung all the time and am so psyched to get back on the rope.
:bounce:
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Well Dunne!
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Rodellar (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/06/rodellar.html)
1 June 2011, 12:48 pm
Public Safety Notice: This post contains bad language. Sorry Mum.
I am still psyched out of my tiny little mind. It's like being 18 again. Most of my waking thoughts are about climbing. I try to be productive and get work done, but with the students gone, there are no immediate demands on my time and it's easy to let things slide and burn time on the internet cycle. I start with UKB, then make sure UKC is still talking about biscuits, and whether forearm strength is important for climbing (http://www.ukclimbing.com/forums/t.php?n=461282). Then onto facebook, and the climbing blogs (who's done what, where, how quick?). After that, it's time to start on UKB again...
This bank holiday was the first one I haven't worked for as long as I can remember. So I risked the wrath of Varian and bought a couple of flights to Spain for me and the wife. The plan; fly to Barcelona and go climbing somewhere every day until dark. On leaving the UK it was 30 degrees so we needed somewhere cool. My spies inform me Rodellar is looking good. Crush mode engaged.
Jules narrowly missing the flash on Sopa de Ajo, 7b+
We arrive in Rodellar at 3am on Saturday morning. After a boatload of faff with the hire car and refugio I am tired and snappy. But the next morning we awake to birdsong, blue skies and vultures circling above the beautiful Mascun gorge. The late night has dulled my psyche a little and it's not until noon we reach the Gran Boveda and get in touch with our spies; Dan and Tom. Warming up in the sun convinces me that the shade is the place to be. The heat of the last few days has eased and a gentle breeze means it's comfortable to sit at the bottom of the crag in shorts and t-shirt.
Dan belaying
So, what to do? The whole crag is dry, which is a first for me, and I'm like a kid in a sweetshop. But before we came out we'd been discussing the curse of the "first day on". Made famous in Stone Love (http://www.slackjaw.co.uk/climbingfilms/stonelove.html), this is when you arrive at a climbing area and run around like a dog with nine cocks, trying everything in sight. Next morning you wake up trashed; you've done too much, much too soon. Like the seasoned pro I am, I was very keen to avoid the first day curse and thought I'd restrict myself to a few nice 7s. Sopa de Ajo was the perfect choice; a wonderful continuous drainpipe tufa, technical and rounded. I'd wanted to do it for ages, but it was always wet. The route passed in a delightful blur of total absorption; palming and twisting my way from kneebar to jug to kneebar. So good.
Dan was trying a great looking 8a called Les Cadres Regeneren in the middle of the wall. Might as well have a look, eh? After all, the clips were in and a quick 8a redpoint would start the trip nicely. It didn't quite go to plan; legs trembling an uncomfortable distance above the last bolt I'm switching quickly from hand to hand, desperately trying to get some strength back in my arms. I don't know whether I'm fighting to keep the onsight dream alive, or whether I don't want to take the fall. I claw my way a couple of moves higher and into a poor rest and realise the chains are one move away. I remember a hard slap to a poor sidepull and some desperate re-arranging of feet and then a jug you could hang a cruise liner off. Words fail me; I'm back in the saddle baby. Fuck Yeah!
Tom redpointing the rude route in style
Since I'm on fire I might as well keep going. Tom has the draws in a mega (and mega-long) 7b+ called Commando Coño. I won't translate it, but it's not a polite route name. Jules has a flash go, and gets achingly, ludicrously close as she falls off the last hard move, failing to spot another of those titanic jugs that Rodellar has all over it. She doesn't make it look too bad; plenty of good rests, so I hop on, engage crush mode and immediately hit a massive wall, creaking like a lorry dragging its roof on a low bridge. I keep getting to the good rests only to find slopey tufas and awful feet; how did Jules rest here? So I push on to the next rest, getting more pumped, more stressed and more crab-like in my movements. Somehow I manage to fall into the finishing jugs and wobble up the slab to the chain, but I can tell my day is over. Except it isn't; one more duty as ropegun getting the clips in a short 7a and then it's beer, bed and sleep. Ready for the next day
Which, unsurprisingly, does not go well. I get a raging, full-bore flash pump on my 6b warm up and nearly fall off. Once again I fall victim to the first-day curse! What a punter! Today is never going to go well and so I resign myself to having a rest day, except that I simply must try Sayonara Baby; a long 7b+/c on Surgencia up massive flowstone jugs to a tough little sting in the tail. Should be an easy onsight. Oops, perhaps not. Ok then, at least an easy redpoint. Wrong again; I get to the top, but not without dropping the clutch, and a healthy dose of luck! I spend the rest of the day being more sensible, putting the draws in easy 7's for Jules to flash, which she does like the pro she is.
Unknown chappie on Maroskum, 7c+, Gran Boveda
Last day, last chance. We wake to stormy skies and leaden humidity. We're straight up and out, trying to make the most of the day and warm up in the hammering rain. Jules has her eye on an ascent of a mega-classic 7c up tree-trunk tufas on the right of Boveda, and I fancy a day onsighting, hoping to re-capture the form of the first day. It quickly becomes obvious that this isn't going to happen as I fall low down whilst putting the clips in for Jules; and on a route I've previously onsighted. Oh dear. Dripping with sweat I work out a better sequence, and it becomes clear I missed about six no-hands rests. Good onsighting form then... The day doesn't improve much, either. I completely fail on a vertical 8a in the middle of the wall having totally failed to realise that 30 degree heat and 100% humidity do not play well with sloping tufa crimps. Still, I can recover the day with a nice onsight of the classic Argo, can't I? Well, no. Nor can I redpoint straight off either. I use quite impolite language at this. By now it's 8pm, we've been going all day and neither of us have ticked our routes.
And this is what really pleases me. In the past I've been pretty morose about failure. If I'm honest, it's made climbing quite a lot less fun for me at times. I looked back at posts on this blog, written when I was in my best ever form and having great success on the crag, and it's a ceaseless tide of whinging crap. Now, here I am on a short trip having completely muffed up my strategy and failing to redpoint a route that I should be walking up, and I'm having a fucking great time! The route is, quite simply, amazing. I'm quite happy to fail as long as I can keep trying and, for once, I'm happy to just to be where I am, and not beating myself up and wishing I was climbing better. It feels like such a breakthrough. At last, climbing is fun again.
Still, it's cool now. The wind has picked up and heavy thunder is rolling down from the Pyrenees. The rain is blowing into the crag and run-off is creeping steadily down the route. I've got one last chance to go big, or go home so I lace up my shoes, strap on the knee-pads and tear the route apart, grinning like an idiot the whole way. Jules is similarly inspired and pulls out a last-ditch, last gasp redpoint on the 7c, skipping clips and somehow catching wild slaps at the edge of her strength. It's past nine now, and very dark, but I'm too psyched to go home yet so we rush off to the Ali-Baba cave and I hurl myself at an onsight of the short 7c+/8a on the right hand-side. No-chance; it's pitch black, and I'm knackered. Hanging off the rope and peering through the gloom I spot a crucial foot-hold and lower-off, re-tie and shake wildly to the chains. I run up a 7a to the right whilst I've still got my shoes on and finally admit defeat as the last of the light vanishes.
Today, I'm back on the internet cycle. I must need a holiday...
(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-3207624295759863589?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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there are no immediate demands on my time and it's easy to let things slide and burn time on the internet cycle. I start with UKB, then make sure UKC is still talking about biscuits, and whether forearm strength is important for climbing (http://www.ukclimbing.com/forums/t.php?n=461282). Then onto facebook, and the climbing blogs (who's done what, where, how quick?). After that, it's time to start on UKB again...
Sounds like my day, ad infinitum.
Good work on psyche from both of you.
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:agree:
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If I could re-run any two months of my life, I'd go for the two months I had Rodellar. So fucking good!
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Bat route (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/06/bat-route.html)
6 June 2011, 2:03 pm
On UKC at the moment are some videos (http://www.ukclimbing.com/articles/page.php?id=3790) of Adam Ondra at Malham, including one of his onsight of Bat Route. Obviously I watched it intently, hoping to pick up some beta, and watching the world's best climber attempt a route I have spent (to date) seven days on.
Once I'd picked myself off the floor, I watched it again, and gleaned some useful and interesting ideas for the section through the roof above Seventh Ardvaark. This section has some tough and beefy moves on undercuts, and was punishing me out of all proportion to it's difficulty. Sam can cruise it. Mawson cruises it. Obviously Steve cruises it. I don't so much cruise it as crash heavily into the pier. In the UKC video, Adam uses a brute force and ignorance method which had obvious appeal...
So on Saturday we head off to Malham. It is hotter than the Sun, so a late start is in order, and when we arrive (at about 3pm) conditions are only absolutely awful. The perfect opportunity to train with a weighted bat (http://baseballtips.com/training-aids/hitting/bratts-bats.html), so to speak. So I bust up to the roof and try Adam's sequence and, whaddya know, it works! It has the slight disadvantage of occasionally sending me towards the Seventh Aardvaark belay at high speed and head first, but I can live with that. It looks like we are game on apart from a) a bird has made its nest in a 'crucial' heel hook and b) there's still a desperate move on the headwall that I'm worried about. I work out a sequence ignoring the heel hook, but the headwall move remains stubborn. Adam is no help as he lanked past it. Cheat.
After camping at the crag overnight, we climb at Kilnsey on Sunday. It is colder than Hell; the delights of climbing in the UK. At one point Jules flakes out completely and runs away to the trout farm for nourishing sustenance and hot beverages, leaving me huddled in my sleeping bag, sat on my camping chair. I am the only one rocking the sleeping bag/chair combo, and it attracts lots of sarcastic comments. I am warm for my redpoints though, so the last laugh is on me. Anyway, I hear that big issue chic is making a comeback this year. It is of no help on Indian Summer; two redpoints see me falling off the last move. Again. Frustrating route this; it feels well within my abilities, but obviously isn't, or I'd have done it. Maybe next week?
I have an exciting week this week; I am engaging Tom Randall (http://www.wildcountry.co.uk/community/sponsored-climbers/uk-sponsored-climbers/tom-randall-uk/) as a coach, and this week is my assessment session. I imagine I'll get told off a lot, and he'll laugh at my hip flexibility. I just hope there's some front levers on the exam, to reclaim some ego...(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-4153152445110927059?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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I could read this shit all day long.
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I could read this shit all day long.
Yup - its superb :)
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I could read this shit all day long.
You're a fucking slow reader then. But thanks.
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I really hope the spanish "bring a deckchair to the crag" thing doesn't catch on here (almost as much as the shitting at the crag thing).
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I really hope the spanish "bring a deckchair to the crag" thing doesn't catch on here (almost as much as the shitting at the crag thing).
Is that because you're going in front of the dragons next week to get funding for your crag deckchair rental service?
Don't reckon you'll ever see chairs at Tunnel Wall or Yew Cogar, for the same reason you'll never see me at Tunnel Wall or Yew Cogar...
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sharp
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And shit
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we climb at Kilnsey on Sunday. It is colder than Hell;
Now i know you're a boffin rather than a god-botherer, but colder than hell could be quite warm. It covers a fair range, anything from say just cooler than a raging inferno which burns for eternity, right through to absolute zero.
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so... in the true spirit of WWJD, are you going to lose the deckchair, and break out the One Summer era purple lycra hot pants for sending glory? You know it makes sense.
I could read this shit all day long.
agreed.
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I love chairs at the crag. The Spaniards have got it right on chairs, high quality climbing and shouting at you whilst you're trying hard. So everything except for the shit.
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Glad to here deck chairs are coming back. They were all the rage in the early nineties at kilnsey my personal favorite was a proper striped beach type chair that was angled perfectly to avoid kilnsey neck.
They also pre dated the gri gri but worked just as well by winding the rope round the leg a few times whilst the climber rested on the rope.
The BMC should stump up for some nice reclining benches below the best routes, outside climbing seems stuck in the dark ages compare to the luxury's you now get at the wall.
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I love chairs at the crag. The Spaniards have got it right on chairs, high quality climbing and shouting at you whilst you're trying hard. So everything except for the shit.
And Mullets.
Bonjoy, In Dante's Inferno, the ninth circle of Hell contains Satan frozen in ice. Brrr.
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I love chairs at the crag. The Spaniards have got it right on chairs, high quality climbing and shouting at you whilst you're trying hard. So everything except for the shit.
And Mullets.
Dreaded Mullets. Obviously.
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Ah well now, if you'd said "Colder than Dante's ninth circle of hell" in the first place.....
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We can rebuild him... (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/06/we-can-rebuild-him.html)
9 June 2011, 12:30 pm
Well, as i mentioned, I decided it was time to get a coach. Everyone who's everyone has their own coach these days. Last night I went for my assessment session with Tom Randall, all round nice guy and wide crack fetishist. It was good of Tom to squeeze me in, as his little girl Hannah is only a few weeks old, so he can't be getting much sleep. Hannah was very cute, and impeccably behaved whilst I was there, by which I mean she was unconscious.
The assessment session is meant to assess my strengths and weaknesses, so that Tom can tailor my training plan for maximum effect. To this end, Tom has built an impressive array of torture devices designed to narrowly focus on one particular kind of strength. His "crack cellar" is infamous, but pales in comparison to the horrors of the lattice board; a diagonal grid of identical edges designed to test strength, endurance and recovery to the max. No subtleties or places to hide here, just an endless series of good edges on a steep board, circling and circling until you drown in your own lactate.
It was interesting to see how accurate the lattice board was as a predictor of climbing ability. I exploded off the board after 68 moves. Apparently, 70 moves is the standard target for those wishing to onsight 8a; therefore the board neatly agrees with my own idea if where my climbing is right now.
After the board we tested some core strength and did some routes down the wall to assess technical ability and my climbing style. It mostly flagged up that I can't see a hold in front of my face. We also did some front levers to make me happy, and some flexibility tests to make me sad.
I await Tom's assessment with bated bated breath...
(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-7773156850465781150?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Dead shit birds who stop climbing (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/06/dead-shit-birds-who-stop-climbing.html)
13 June 2011, 3:29 pm
Got the Randall assessment thru the mail last night. Not too much controversy there; I was pretty amazed to hear him praise my above average technique and footwork, and totally unshocked to find that I'm a bit stronger than I am fit. Other than that, the take home message seemed to be that I'm reasonably well rounded, but with some weaknesses we can work on. He reckons with a couple of weeks work I can be onsighting 8b+. Well, maybe not, but there are things to work on at least...
This weekend we were full-bore, all guns blazing up to Malham so Jules could put some more time in on the proj. My goals were less clear; the hurty elbow is still quite hurty, and I've received some conflicting advice about cause and treatment. I think this means I must exercise some caution and restraint with the hurty elbow. Still, after warming up it seems to hurt a bit less, so I figured I'd put in some big links on Bat Route. After many, many days struggling with the crux on this, it is starting to come together, thanks to slightly larger biceps, and a radically different sequence. In fact, in the back of my mind is a little feeling that the route might actually go sometime soon. This feeling is elusive, and scurries away every time I notice it. To be honest, I'm trying not to pay it too much attention. If I ignore it completely, there's every chance I'll tick the route before I've had a chance to stress out about it. This is going to take some mental fortitude, and a bit of luck on the route itself...
Unfortunately, mother nature has failed to bend meekly to my will. A swift has made its home in just about the only hold you can't climb round. Damn birds. I hang on the rope looking bemused at this turn of events and debate in my head whether the route is worth becoming an evil bird-murderer for. My better angels win out, eventually. I need another project for the nesting season.
Idefix won't do. It's quite horrible and sharp. I make sure I tick it quickly, so I never have to go on it again. Urgh. On Sunday I have a quick look at Cry Freedom. My previous on this route involves yarding past most of the climbing to get to the top crux and completely failing on it for a best part of an hour. I've always felt a bit disappointed in this route. The climbing to get to the crux is fabulous and really involved; it really makes me want to climb it. Unfortunately the great climbing only takes you as far as the decidedly reachy and totally un-great crux. I can just about span between the two holds, but only with a couple of fingers, and only with very high and burly feet. With an extra inch it would be much easier, and that's not a very satisfying kind of move to spend your days falling off.
This time up things go a bit better and I actually manage to do the moves about one go in three from hanging on the rope. Bizarrely, this makes be even more ambivalent about the route. At least when I simply couldn't do the moves, it was a clean cut not-project. Now it occupies the hazy nether world of the possible project, which makes the prospect of repeated reachy failure high up both more realistic, and more intimidating. One to leave until I've ticked Rainshadow, or grown a bit, whichever comes first.
Still, Jules doesn't tick, which means I'm still in need of a Malham proj; Totally Free II? Hmmm..(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-6581047561392934072?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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From the post title I thought this was about Magpie for a mo :lol: ;) :-*
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In search of the perfect rock shoe (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/07/in-search-of-perfect-rock-shoe.html)
27 July 2011, 7:17 pm
Well, where are we? Last time I wrote Jules was working predator, and looking good for a quick ascent. My elbow was sore and giving me considerable worry. I was keen to start red pointing on Bat Route, but nesting birds had postponed plans. That was over a month ago now. Such is the breakneck pace of my life that as of today, we're pretty much in the same place.
The birds have hatched on Bat Route, and the peregrine has totally failed to do my dirty work for me. The Internet doesn't know much about how long swifts take to nest, but I'm guessing I'm gonna be in business in a month or so. I've done the links to and from the nest without much rest, so if the birds leave and it stays dry, we're game on. That's if hurty elbow allows; he's still a lot hurty.
Jules still hasn't done predator, but is ridiculously close. Her Spanish coach/Torquemada (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Torquemada) has her training harder than anything I've ever seen. Watch this space.
The only news of any note is that the quest for perfect climbing shoes continues. Why am I so obsessed with shoes? It's probably because for a (not so) modest outlay of cash, you can improve your climbing. It's an instant hit! Previously my heart has gone out to the Sportiva Miura VSs; they're just so precise. But they're not green. The new 5.10 Hornets are the coolest looking boots I've ever seen. That counts for something. Sheffield coffee shop impresario and one-time training guru Matt Smythe used to recommend wearing a baggy harness; it makes you feel thin, and if you feel thin, you feel good. Stu feels good, Stu climbs good! So I quite fancied a pair of green shoes and the fit in the shop felt amazing. £110 duly parted with.
The shoes are also quite a break from the norm; there's no midsole and the rubber is only 2mm thick. They're so soft you can crush them in the palm of your hand. Sadly that means that they're too soft for me, at least on British limestone. The quest continues. I wonder if these (http://fiveten.com/products/footwear-detail/10094-anasazi-high-top) are any good?
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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hurty elbows and shoe fetish?
seems like we share a lot!!!
ps. how do the Hornets feel like? I am very tempted to get a pair, I only have one pair of Dragons still in the box, don't want to run out of shoes all of a sudden.
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If you mostly climb on steep rock, the hornets could be amazing! They feel like hyper-sensitive dragons, and are actually kind-of OK for edging, given their softness.
I'm struggling to get on with them for two reasons.
1) They're a bit soft for UK rock, and you can't put a lot of weight on really tiny edges in them.
2) The rubber is so thin you can feel the rock through them, and I think I "back off" and put less force through the rock than I otherwise would. Presumably you'd get over this in time; I remember thinking dragons were shit the first time I put them on, too...
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I can't help but think that the latest range from 5.10 would be the bees knees if they just had a little bit of backbone to them, Quantums especially so.
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If you mostly climb on steep rock, the hornets could be amazing!
IF?
thanks Stu!!!
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Coach's orders... (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/08/coach-orders.html)
2 August 2011, 11:39 pm
I'm quite a few weeks into coach Randall's plan now. It's quite a break from what I've been used too. Out go the endless circuits on the foundry bouldering wall (to the delight of the regulars). In comes 4x4s on the lead wall and 'continuity' sessions where I try and climb an "easy" route as many times as I can in 10 minutes. Then do it again. And again. And again, until my eyes bleed.
This weekend I ended up doing 50 for 5 at Kilnsey about 15 times in under an hour. It's surprisingly invigorating and aerobic as you're moving fast enough to get your heart pumping and a proper sweat on. The 4x4s have been the real killer. Initially I was making them a bit too easy, but some stern words from Tom, and a bit of competition to keep up with my training partner (the awesome Emma Twyford) means I've racheted up the intensity, with routes between 7a+ and 7c being lapped in short order. Brutal, but the missus says she can see the difference already, so by the time the nests are vacated (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/06/dead-shit-birds-who-stop-climbing.html), I'll be in crushing form!
The new regime has one slight problem. Tom is a wide crack fetishist (http://wideboyz.blogspot.com/), who thinks that real climbing consists of doing a thousand sit ups with your body contorted like a car crash victim. Since I don't routinely climb routes with my legs, he thinks my core strength is lacking. Once a week he's got me doing the core endurance session from hell. A million crunches, side crunches, dishes, leg raises. By the end of it I can only curl up on my bed and whimper. I think he hates me. But you've got to have dedication, and keep your eye on the prize. As Jules' coach wrote to her in an email; NON STOP, NON STOP A MUERTE!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Drudgery (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/08/drudgery.html)
20 August 2011, 2:12 am
My job is a privilege. I get to travel to exotic locations and do anything my curiosity drives me to do, provided I can justify it to the taxpayer. The observatories where I work are breathtaking locations. The night sky contains views like these:
So I love my job. But sometimes, just occasionally, it's a pain in the ass. As part of my job, I help operate a special camera for astronomy. I wrote about it here (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2010/01/night-watch.html). I'm out supporting other astronomers who want to use that camera, and it's been a total bitch. We've had loads of technical trouble, which means I'm up all day fixing things and up all night operating the camera for other people. I've been averaging about 4 hours sleep a day. It's all a bit like hard work.
On top of that, I'm trying to keep training whilst I'm out here. I've still got a set plan from Coach Randall, so I'm trying to do all of that all my portable fingerboard that the nice boys at Beastmaker (http://beastmaker.co.uk/) made for me. This I have achieved with a clever combination of bungee cord, pulleys, weights and a harness. There's even a winch in the optics lab where I can train with the lights on, and not worry about disturbing the telescope. It's a weird place to train, amongst the lab equipment, and I can tell you now that stamina training on a fingerboard is pretty damn boring. So work feels like work, and even climbing feels like work.
But I don't care. I've got my eye on the prize, 'cos I'm coming home to September; the month of crush. I've got two weeks at Malham and a 10-day climbing holiday to look forward to and I'm going to be in the best goddam shape of my life, because nothing prepares you for heroics like sleep deprivation and hanging from planks of wood. Plus, I've got the Patxi training bit from Progression playing on a permanent loop on my laptop. So that's nice (https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-1827169760216272227?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Tangible (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/08/tangible.html)
23 August 2011, 3:35 am
I've been an astronomer now for over 13 years. One thing that surprises many people is that professional astronomers don't have much of a visceral connection with the night sky. When I'm operating my telescope for work I sit in an air-conditioned control room with fluorescent lighting. Images come from the telescope to my PC where they're often analysed automatically by software written for the purpose. Most of of the time I interact with a stream of numbers, and never even see the pictures.
I don't even need to know my way around the constellations. The telescope's computer-controlled mount takes care of finding my targets for me. I just type in the co-ordinates and off we go. There was a time when I'd been a professional astronomer for nearly 5 years, and didn't know more constellations than Orion and Cassiopeia!
My relationship with the night sky changed a few years ago, when I started to use my spare time at observatories to take pictures of pretty parts of the sky. No telescopes here, just a camera, some lenses and a mount that will track the rotation of the stars in the sky. I've had to actually learn where things are in the night sky. And then there's something truly amazing about pointing a camera at a patch of sky, opening the shutter for a couple of minutes and seeing a beautiful picture of some galaxy or cluster appear on the CCD screen. Suddenly those objects I've known from catalogs and papers seem incredibly real. Tangible. One photo and I know, with a certainty I've never had before, that the Andromeda galaxy is there, hanging in the patch of sky near Cassiopeia.
So tonight I have one of those rare things at an observatory; a night off. Actually, I'm supposed to be working, but the telescope is broken so I've got some spare time, and having worked the previous 11 nights straight, I don't feel like trying to write papers, or analyse data. So I've spent the night outside, under the Milky Way. I set up my camera and my fingerboard, put the Smashing Pumpkins on my iPod at full volume, and hung under the stars whilst my shutter clicked repeatedly. During rest periods I watched for shooting stars. I could get all hippy on you at this stage, but suffice it to say it's been a pretty fucking amazing night. And now, at the end of it, I'm 0.005% stronger, and have this picture to show for it....
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Quality musings Stu, and a cracking music choice as well :great:
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The Circle of Life (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/09/circle-of-life.html)
5 September 2011, 3:12 pm
The death of the humblest creature may provide sustenance for the King of Beasts. And so we mourn not the passing of any creature, because all creatures are connected by the great Circle of Life (apart from Jellyfish (http://deepseanews.com/2011/06/the-circle-of-life-and-how-jellyfish-screw-it-up/)).
As with nature, so it is with climbing. I have returned from my self-imposed exile in the Canary Islands, and am eager to begin battle proper with the mighty Bat Route, which soars imposingly up the centre of Malham Cove. Regular readers of this blog will note that I was having a little trouble with squatters (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/06/dead-shit-birds-who-stop-climbing.html) on this route. I was sure that with the onset of Sendtember, the nesting birds would have begun their flight to Africa, and I could destroy their home whilst they weren't looking. I was a little sad to see that the Peregrine had beaten me too it; the nest was in turmoil, and a suspicious looking hole had appeared in the front of the outer wall. Sad news for the swifts, good news for me!
And so the siege begins! Bat Route consists of a short 7b into a orgy of thuggy undercut moves through the main overhang. These bring you, panting, to a perfect double knee-bar rest. Whilst hanging upside down in the middle of the cove you can wave to the tourists and contemplate the next section, a bouldery runout on terrible smears. If you have recovered enough, then a tenuous layback move, miles above a pathetic rust-stain pretending to be a bolt will bring you to another great rest, this time on enormous jugs with poor feet. From here you have only the final 7c/+ section on smee smears and tiny crimps between you and the top. It's just that this last section is about a million moves long.
Day 1 sees me get much higher than I thought I would; through the pant-filling runout and into the good rest. From here you can kid yourself that you're going to crush the headwall but most goes see me fade out by a hard move halfway up the headwall. This is a move that tall people (http://www.ukclimbing.com/videos/play.php?i=629) can lank past, but most will have to pull on a despicable side pull, rendered useful by dint of a tiny tiny thumb-catch. When I get here I feel as if all strength has been sucked form my arms, and I can't even crimp up. I leave the crag psyched to get this high, but wondering if I'll ever have the stamina to pull through this move.
Day 2, Go 1 answers that question with a resounding yes! Everything goes wrong on this go; the holds have filled with mud and water, and I have to clean them off after each jug. Worse yet, my feet pop on the runout, draining my bowels along with my reserves of stamina. Nevertheless I manage to shake out a little before the hard headwall move and cruise through it. Suddenly there are only three moves between me and glory! Move one, piss. Move two is piss. I feel strong, quite fresh and the sound of angels singing Glory! fills my mind. I get so excited I miss out the little intermediate crimp I always use, which turns out to be an appalling mistake. Disaster! My left brain is pleased to reach this highpoint, and cooly logs it to feed future optimism. My right brain has a proper paddy and spends ten minutes shouting and cursing, before sloping off to its room for a sulk. From this point on, things go from bad to worse. The sun comes out, instantly turning the cove from a piece of rock into a creeping wave of slime. Worse still, I am struck low by the worst migraine known to man. Instead of dusting myself off and finishing the route I am left to lie on the catwalk and gently whimper.
So now the wait begins. Will it stay dry for a whole five days? Who knows - the forecast is for rain and I may yet see my victory snatched from my grasp....
And what about Jules, I hear you ask? Well, Jules is still trying Predator. Despite having made it through the hard climbing about a month ago, wet rock and life have got in the way and she had yet to regain that highpoint. On Sunday, despite poor conditions she was determined she would at least make it through the crux again. Four red points later and she had failed at the last move each time. At this point other people would see sense and give up. Indeed, everyone else had gone home and dusk was falling as Jules tied in for an epic fifth go. Obviously tired, she fought her way to the last hard move and strained through it, finding herself on the easier headwall for a second time. Cool and collected she cruised through her previous highpoint and was looking good for the tick when a flash pump threw her confidence and her right foot slipped! She was robbed!
In fact, we were both robbed and on the same day. Climbing can be a cruel mistress sometimes; run a good time in a 100m race and you go home feeling happy. Yesterday Jules and I were a whisker away from our best climbing performances ever, and we go home totally empty handed and with 'what-if' ringing in our ears...(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-3639376335761436533?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Operation Grade Chase (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/10/operation-grade-chase.html)
2 October 2011, 9:43 pm
8a. It's a grade. It's the grade, if we're honest. It's not 7b.nu is it? I've been slogging up the steep hill of progress for many years now. A few years back I reached a bright and sunny plateau, where on sighting 8a felt like the kind of thing I could do pretty regularly. I've never reached that beautiful spot since. But I've been slogging around the hillside some more since then and I reckoned I was ready to try again. So. 6 days. South of France. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to onsight every 8a you can find in the guidebook. This blog post will self-destruct in five seconds...
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-dEekRQXohgg/TojXV6fhr-I/AAAAAAAAAAQ/VGjoSp9YZoI/s320/IMG_6023.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-dEekRQXohgg/TojXV6fhr-I/AAAAAAAAAAQ/VGjoSp9YZoI/s1600/IMG_6023.jpg)Day 1Jurassic Park. Grade chase status: total failure.
Our ex-pat hosts take us to meet other ex-pats Mike and Elaine Owen at their favourite crag. Everyone is english, just like the costa del sol. Don't even get on an 8a, but do fail to redpoint 8a+. Chapeau Monsieur Littlefair.
Day 2Jurassic/Cayenne. Grade chase status: dismal failure.
More classic tufa action. I don't understand tufa. There seems to be jugs everywhere but I just end up getting massively pumped and baffled. More brits at the crag today, including Al Cassidy, who floats up Diplodocus (8a). He makes it look so easy I get on after him and totally balls it up. Redpoint yesterday's 8a+ to make me feel better. Go to nearby Cayenne; looks awesome. Fail to get on an 8a.
Day 3Deverse. Grade chase status: almost successful (i.e failed again)(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-jXkDC0SWf0w/TojY4QwB63I/AAAAAAAAAAU/nPxIXReEjRc/s320/IMG_6030.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-jXkDC0SWf0w/TojY4QwB63I/AAAAAAAAAAU/nPxIXReEjRc/s1600/IMG_6030.jpg)Really psyched. Today is the big one. Deverse Satanique; the best 8a since they were invented. Snaky tufas snaking up a big overhanging wall. I'm so psyched for this one I watch videos of it all night, and bring them to the crag. Nothing's gonna stop me here. I pull on, cruise through the bottom and balls up the first hard move. I see a theme developing here. Balls up another 8a on the RHS, even though it would get VS in Cheedale. Not a happy bunny.
Day 4St Martin Vesubie. Grade chase status: are you still even asking?
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-28stwgTJ9iM/TojZd3RN8sI/AAAAAAAAAAY/9fR9Qbz-RF4/s320/IMG_6058.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-28stwgTJ9iM/TojZd3RN8sI/AAAAAAAAAAY/9fR9Qbz-RF4/s1600/IMG_6058.jpg)
What an amazing crag. Really; it's completely incredible. Cool features. Enormous routes. Beautiful locations. There aren't any 8a's here. I don't even know why we came.
Day 5Jurassic/Cayenne. Grade chase status: I'm so depressed.
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-LgvG1feoGLQ/TojZ3ZGVzsI/AAAAAAAAAAc/AJBd782tilc/s320/IMG_6105.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-LgvG1feoGLQ/TojZ3ZGVzsI/AAAAAAAAAAc/AJBd782tilc/s1600/IMG_6105.jpg)
Actually tried an 8a today. Fell off it.
Day 6 St Cezaire. Grade chase status: YYFY!
This crag is British. It's got crimps and everything. Finally, finally I onsight an 8a. I think it's soft. It gets 7c+ in one guide. I'm taking the tick though. In fact, you couldn't prise the tick from my cold dead fingers.
All in all a great trip. Thoroughly recommend the area to all looking to fall off 8as. One thing puzzles me. Every day we drove past the "Easy Love, Love shop". Looks like a classy establishment, but can any of my worldy wise readers tell me what the duck is all about?
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-tghMl1LmEWs/Toja2i02G5I/AAAAAAAAAAg/HlhPHPjQzEY/s320/IMG_6035.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-tghMl1LmEWs/Toja2i02G5I/AAAAAAAAAAg/HlhPHPjQzEY/s1600/IMG_6035.jpg)
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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but can any of my worldy wise readers tell me what the duck is all about?
Have you dared looking on their etherweb site?
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I think Jules and Sheila looked, but they were sn**gering so much I didn't dare ask them :worms:
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What an amazing crag. Really; it's completely incredible. Cool features. Enormous routes. Beautiful locations. There aren't any 8a's here. I don't even know why we came.
:lol:
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Problem > Solved.
(http://www.easy-love.fr/wp-content/gallery/sextoys/sextoys_02.jpg)
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I feel unclean.
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I feel unclean.
That'll be the water off a duck's back....
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A new level of wrong has just been reached, especially the botom left one.
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Zed: Bring out the Duckie.
Maynard: Duckie's sleeping.
Zed: Well, I guess you're gonna have to go wake him up now, won't you?
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Double Crush! (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/10/double-crush.html)
3 October 2011, 2:06 pm
One of the great things about epic sieges is that you never have to ask "where shall we climb today?". Back from France, back to Malham. The unseasonal weather had worked its charm and the cove, which we left sulking under a coat of black is pristine again.
Plans to climb on saturday are quickly shelved. The mercury rises to record heights, and paint peels from fences. This is not the day to be sat at the focus of an 80-m wide reflector. Instead we visit Jenny and Bruno and their new arrival Sam, who is the definition of adorable; lively and with a wide range of interesting facial expressions. Cafes and gentle walks are a perfect match for the 30-degree heat. In the evening we drive to Malham and have dinner in the Listers, where we encounter some fools who tried to climb, sitting in the shade and peeling their blistered skin.
Sunday brings rain, warm air and cloying humidity. Not perfect sending temps. On my first dog up Bat Route it is quite obvious that things are against me: conditions are gash; my new shoes feel clumpy and don't work in the crucial heel-hook. Worst of all, my hurty elbow has acquired a new trick, and my left bicep appears to have gone to sleep. It simply won't recruit, and seems to have no power. This is disappointing because if there's one thing you want on a roof full of undercuts, it's some guns to brag about.
Jules is looking in better shape on Predator. In fact I've never seen her so strong on it. It's still a bit wet, and she's carrying a towel up with her to dry footholds on redpoint, but it's game on I'd say. And so we start.
Round 1I fall off the roof; something I haven't done for ages. Jules cruises to the crux, but fails to get through it.
Round 2I fall off the roof again. Biceps would clearly be of some use here. Jules gets through crux but then gets muddled up and falls getting her feet up.
Round 3I'm through the roof! God knows how, but still. My mum-made kneepads work like a dream and I get loads back in the knee bars. Which is a good job, because the runout above is horrendous; I smear and stab and grease my way through the pinches; I've never come so close to taking the lob. This is proving to be a massive fight; obviously I've got no chance. But here's something funny; I'm not pumped. All that French grade chasing must have done something for my fitness and I leave the rest feeling good. In fact, I fully crush my way through the crispy headwall and onto the French 6b finish. It's in the bag! Except....
On the walk in, Jules asked me if my route stayed dry in the rain. "Of course", I answered. I should have thought about that a bit more. The top wall is soaked. Naturally, I keep my cool, which is to say I wobble and scream my way to the ledge. My screams of "Oh christ! It's so wet!" cause much mirth around the cove but it's done. Finis. Nothing to do but lower off and enjoy the exposure one last time.
Back down to earth and I am ecstatic. But, poor Jules. How many more people must she see complete their projects before she nails hers? She congratulates me, of course, but the disappointment and sadness shows through, and I feel crushed. She deserves it so much more; why did it have to be me to tick today?
She still has a chance though; her third red point sees her through the crux again, and in cruise control this time. She looks strong and composed and she falls from the moves at the first chain again. No! How can she do this? No-one falls there. Certainly not twice. Certainly not three times! How can she be so cheated? Obviously, at this point Jules is pretty angry. It's not helped by the fact that the damp is coming through; holds on the start are wet. The top tufas are slimy. Will she get another chance this year? Amid all this pressure, she dusts herself down, and sets off for
Round 4Shaky and wheel-spinning through the start. A bad sign. Leaving the half-height rest she looks good but stalls on the traverse; feet shaky and a few wild slaps. I hold my breath. She makes it, and powers through the crux and onto the easier headwall. Surely this time? You can't drop it from here four times, can you? I hold my breath. She does not; aggression and power screams pouring down the wall. She's there! Across from the first belay and into a monster rest; one bolt from the chains. The cove is crushed into silence. I glance across at Keefe and raise my hands in silent prayer. Aeons pass. She sets off and cruises to the chain. Clip. Silence. I think she's a bit confused by what just happened. Then it hits, and her face is split by a grin of pure joy.
Double Crush! Chapeau Team Littlefair! It goes without saying that we celebrate with a massive McDonald's blowout. Today I feel a little queasy. But dead chuffed.(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-755230334153412973?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Good crushing scene! :icon_beerchug:
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Excellent, great siege action!
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What a great read! Congrats on the ticking.
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Whe-hey, well deserved, those must have been among the worst conditions up there all year! Congratulations
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Nice one team LF.
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Luvvverly jubbberly :great:
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I'm happy you're both happy. SYKE me!!
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But, poor Jules. How many more people must she see complete their projects before she nails hers? She congratulates me, of course, but the disappointment and sadness shows through, and I feel crushed.
That's the downside with being focused on getting the tick, isn't it.
Well done though, good entertaining post.
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great last two posts stu. being in Chironico with 34 degrees gives time to think and i really found myself in your lines, crushing aside. thank you.
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:beer2: Splendid efforts
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Coach Randall done good! (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/10/coach-randall-done-good.html)
9 October 2011, 9:39 pm
I'm not going to write much about my weekend, because it was wet and fairly unimpressive on the climbing front. On saturday I went to the Works with the two mini-Ruperts (age 33 and <1year, respectively). On Sunday Jules and I went back to Malham to get some pics. It was horrid, so we drove from there to the Tor, which was also horrid, so we drove to the Foundry. Which was dry, at least.
Much more exciting though, is that Coach Randall destroyed his U.S project, the only off-width visible from space! The ascent has made a bit of a splash in the news, with UKC articles (http://www.ukclimbing.com/news/item.php?id=64429), a great blog post from Alex Ekins (http://alexekins.co.uk/the-hardest-offwidth-in-the-world/), and some grumbling from Stevie Haston (http://steviehaston.blogspot.com/2011/10/century-crack-2-by-stevie-good-job.html), one of the great heroes, who's lost a project to a younger man.
What I like about this news story is the backdrop of obsession and quirkiness that lies behind it. Developing an unhealthy attraction to off-widths is pretty rare behaviour for anyone, but is right out of left-field in the UK, where we don't have much of this particular type of climbing. It's so impressive that Tom and Pete buried themselves in their cellar, burdened themselves with huge weights and hung from parallel joints of wood until their eyes bled, their muscles burst and their sanity cracked. There's something oddly British about emerging from a small cellar as two of the best crack climbers in the world. As someone posted on supertopo.com - "this is the attitude that built the British Empire". What a pair of legends!(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-7591815874431139280?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Wall (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/10/wall.html)
26 October 2011, 9:13 pm
You can't climb every weekend. This weekend the wife and I went up to the quiet county to walk sections of Hadrian's Wall with my mother-in-law. We stayed in the excellent beggar bog (http://www.bandb-on-hadrianswall.co.uk/) B&B which is o'er the wall from Queen's Crag, run by a climber and does really excellent cooked breakfasts. Heartily recommended for those looking for a luxury bouldering break.
I found the days walking along the wall fascinating. Mind-boggling to think a centurion could stand on that wall looking south, let his minds eye roam over thousands of miles to the edge of the Sahara and know it was all one single Roman empire. It struck me how much the pace of life has changed out of all recognition. The wall was built over a ten year period, by two teams starting from either end of the country. That's an average of 16 metres a day, though they would have to have gone a bit faster than that since they also built forts and milecastles in those ten years. How could they stand it? There are sections on the wall where you can see to the end of the earth, and they would have inched along those hillsides at a measly 16 metres every day. It must have felt like their entire lives would be spend placing bricks in a line.
Was this as unbearable as I think it must be, or has our modern pace of life changed our sense of time forever? If something takes me ten days I begin to think of it as a ceaseless task. On our way along the wall we met a man who was walking the route from coast to coast with two fell-ponies, descendants of the original ponies who helped build the wall. He was doing it to draw attention to the plight of the ponies (http://www.shadow-of-the-wall.co.uk/) who, apparently, are endangered. The ponies make slow progress on the rough terrain and he was moving at around five miles a day. We met him on Saturday and again on Sunday, barely any further on. It will take him over two weeks to complete the walk, at which point he'll turn round and start walking back...
Some shots below.
| (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Xodt5JZh3HA/TqborFaJRPI/AAAAAAAAAA8/kJKotVA05C4/s200/IMG_6209.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Xodt5JZh3HA/TqborFaJRPI/AAAAAAAAAA8/kJKotVA05C4/s1600/IMG_6209.jpg) | (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-0oPRcm_8l_U/Tqboo4fx5iI/AAAAAAAAAAs/BKZhUC7-VUw/s200/IMG_6199.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-0oPRcm_8l_U/Tqboo4fx5iI/AAAAAAAAAAs/BKZhUC7-VUw/s1600/IMG_6199.jpg) |
| (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EbU6fX_3tzU/Tqbot8C8cNI/AAAAAAAAABM/kOO-0-Kmesg/s200/IMG_6220.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EbU6fX_3tzU/Tqbot8C8cNI/AAAAAAAAABM/kOO-0-Kmesg/s1600/IMG_6220.jpg) | (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-g4Ory-mXrq8/Tqbosz47h7I/AAAAAAAAABE/VoVzTH7co_8/s200/IMG_6216.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-g4Ory-mXrq8/Tqbosz47h7I/AAAAAAAAABE/VoVzTH7co_8/s1600/IMG_6216.jpg) |
| (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-92kqwQbnKFQ/TqbonkqxbCI/AAAAAAAAAAk/DRLbidjg-_k/s200/IMG_6194.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-92kqwQbnKFQ/TqbonkqxbCI/AAAAAAAAAAk/DRLbidjg-_k/s1600/IMG_6194.jpg) | (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-sbTekhpHQCI/TqboqM7E2BI/AAAAAAAAAA0/p66O2w3s_Yo/s200/IMG_6203.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-sbTekhpHQCI/TqboqM7E2BI/AAAAAAAAAA0/p66O2w3s_Yo/s1600/IMG_6203.jpg) |
| (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-klDE3VXKFfQ/Tqboujdc4DI/AAAAAAAAABU/9-Kj2qFlxvU/s200/IMG_6227.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-klDE3VXKFfQ/Tqboujdc4DI/AAAAAAAAABU/9-Kj2qFlxvU/s1600/IMG_6227.jpg) | (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-sBUIl1oWXDY/TqbowML5j6I/AAAAAAAAABc/dw8K1aCLGmI/s200/IMG_6232.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-sBUIl1oWXDY/TqbowML5j6I/AAAAAAAAABc/dw8K1aCLGmI/s1600/IMG_6232.jpg) |
| (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-MosOOOV-r-Y/TqboxZh0GlI/AAAAAAAAABk/KrQP1IIqKrc/s200/IMG_6236.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-MosOOOV-r-Y/TqboxZh0GlI/AAAAAAAAABk/KrQP1IIqKrc/s1600/IMG_6236.jpg) |
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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If something takes me ten days I begin to think of it as a ceaseless task.
Like redpointing a project?? ;)
Nice post.
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really nice. AVE CAESAR STU.
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I once read a short story called, I think, Great Wall of China, by, I think, Franz Kafka. It was unsurprisingly about the building of said edifice although there was probably a metaphor in there that passed me by.
It talked about that crushing psychology of just adding bricks to the end of a wall with no end in sight, so each village or community was give a one mile section at random along the length of the line of the wall. This community was then given a generation to build its mile. That way there was always something for it to be aiming for, a target, and not just a process.
I always remember that story. Although I may have forgotten most of it.
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If you're interested
http://www.kafka-online.info/the-great-wall-of-china.html (http://www.kafka-online.info/the-great-wall-of-china.html)
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sometimes the process is the target.
nice one Grimer.
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Having done a bit of work in construction 16 metres a day seems astonishingly fast, really impressive. I have to wonder at the numbers of men involved - never mind building the thing, who was getting that amount of stone from quarry to wall every day, and how? And who did the catering?
In my experience straightforward manual labour is actually very satisfying as long as you can see the job progress. Which these guys would have done. Though most of them were probably slaves, which would make 'job satisfaction' a rather facile term.
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Great post Stu, although I agree with JB, 16 m a day seems fast! I guess manpower was pretty cheap back then...
Also I reckon looking south from Hadrian's wall would have been a bad idea for a centurion, unless he had a homie watching his back!
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Over the heather the wet wind blows,
I've lice in my tunic and a cold in my nose.
The rain comes pattering out of the sky,
I'm a Wall soldier, I don't know why.
The mist creeps over the hard grey stone,
My girl's in Tungria; I sleep alone.
Aulus goes hanging around her place,
I don't like his manners, I don't like his face.
Piso's a Christian, he worships a fish;
There'd be no kissing if he had his wish.
She gave me a ring but I diced it away;
I want my girl and I want my pay.
When I'm a veteran with only one eye
I shall do nothing but look at the sky.
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Damn You Evolution! (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/10/damn-you-evolution.html)
31 October 2011, 1:29 pm
No, this isn't some anti-Darwin rant, just an outpouring of frustration about the difficulty of Jerry Moffat's Raven Tor "creation" (ahem).
I've had a hate-hate relationship with this route in the past, largely born out of not being able to do the moves, or in many cases hang the holds. Over the years I've been making creeping progress. Each year I inch a move or two closer - a reminder that I am still getting stronger, if only in certain styles and at a pace that would make a sloth blush.
This year I have returned for a dabble, making good use of the freakishly good October weather. I have reduced the "moves I cannot do" count to one, although the "moves I can barely do" count is still pretty high. Perhaps a winter's training will improve my crimp strength and hip flexibility enough to start red pointing?
When I did Make it Funky, back in the year 2007 AD, I couldn't do any of the moves at all on the crimpy headwall. By contrast, pocket power midget Ru Davies was enjoying a career break. Between law school and donning a silly wig Ru took time off to write THE peak bouldering guide, go climbing a lot and get freakishly, stupidly strong. His levels of crimp strength reached McClure-esque heights, and it is amazing (and a great shame) that he didn't tick Evolution back then. Here he is, captured in all his glory, by ace cameraman Rich Heap. Watch it and weep....
Evolution (http://vimeo.com/31369791) from Rich Heap (http://www.slackjaw.co.uk/about/about.html).(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-2277104602309159444?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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In my experience straightforward manual labour is actually very satisfying as long as you can see the job progress. Which these guys would have done. Though most of them were probably slaves, which would make 'job satisfaction' a rather facile term.
The wall was built using centurions, not slave labour, apparently. Although that's the wall building, so I guess it leaves scope for enforced labour in the nearby sandstone quarries.
Some great responses to that post; Grimer the Kafka link is awesome, though I had to read it more than twice to get my head round some of it.
16m a day is incredibly fast, but also incredibly slow compared to the size of the job. There's a new bridge over the Colorado above the Hoover dam which took a decade to build, so it's not like we've stopped building projects on this scale, but somehow it doesn't seem quite as awe-inspiring...
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A decade to cross the Colorado you say? I guess that puts the Qingdao bridge in perspective....42.4km in 4 years! I bet the working conditions were better back in 122 AD working on Hadrians wall....
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-13976281 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-13976281)
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The Games (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2011/11/games.html)
8 November 2011, 11:43 am
"It's really great if you do hard outdoor climbing, but you cannot say you're the best. The only way you can say you're the best is if you compete with the best and show the best - I'm the best" - Reindert Lenselink (World Cup Official)
Last night was the start of the Foundry Bouldering League (http://www.foundryclimbing.com/). I used to love bouldering comps; I went to them religiously, got a spot on the GB team, had some mediocre international results. Hard to believe that was back in 2001. Back then Tony Blair was PM, and still the apple of the nation's eye. Many of the events that shaped the modern world were still to come - 9/11, the invasion of Iraq, the launch of Facebook. But last night there was a funny wind in the air, and for the first time in ten years I really felt like going to a comp again. I felt youthful and strong, so I went along to show them all who's best.
Well, the best stayed away (they'd probably heard I was coming), but there was a really good scene down there. Rob Napier had done a great job with a brand new set of Core (http://www.coreclimbing.co.uk/) holds and there was 25 problems to have a crack at and a lot of keen folk around to have some banter with. The Foundry guys had also come up with a new twist on the comp format; as well as the standard problems there was also a "Flash Problem", which gave everyone who flashed it the chance to win a cash prize in a raffle.
The best bouldering comps are the ones where you can drop the 'easy' problems. It keeps the nerves jangling. Last night was a great example of this. Many of the 'hard' problems were fine, but the easy probs were also easy to drop, with some awkward lurches, some technical grooves and some graunchy traverses thrown in to mix things up. I was quite pleased with the way I climbed. Only two problems gave me any real trouble - a desperate slopey yellow and a huge dyno to a large red ball. Both succumbed in the end, but I had to get really angry on the dyno and embarrassed myself with a bit of a roar when I caught it.
It was great to watch the other climbers, too. There were some really cool displays of technique, especially from the females. Leah Crane, Emma Twyford and some young blond lass I don't know climbed really well. These girls have really precise, and very different ways of moving on the rock; I think I could learn a lot from them, if I could get my hips to actually move more than 5 degrees in any direction. There were some great displays of tenacity too; one tiny pre-teen girl kept setting up for the dyno, even though it was much further than her body length. She never got close, but optimism like that is gonna get you up something well hard someday...
There was good cake as well. Basically I had a ball, and I won the aforementioned raffle, so went home with enough cash to take Jules out for dinner. Heartily recommended.(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-8759663355277230150?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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You heartily recommend taking your wife out for dinner? :)
Good work Stu, reminds me of the bristol bouldering comps - you flashing everything, me not doing any of them.
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Just seen the Evolution video, how did Ru not tick it? He was absolutely pathing the fucker! :strongbench:
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Frightening isn't it? I asked him about this vid at the weekend, because he does some of the moves differently to me. He said that he's a bit shaky on the video because he didn't feel very strong that day :jaw:
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that is a ridiculous video.
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Just seen the Evolution video, how did Ru not tick it? He was absolutely pathing the fucker! :strongbench:
I went on holiday the week after I dropped the last move and it was wet when I got back. Then it was summer and I went to europe, then I became a barrister, then I had a kid. :shrug:
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unlucky Ru!
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He wouldn't swap.
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Just seen the Evolution video, how did Ru not tick it? He was absolutely pathing the fucker! :strongbench:
I went on holiday the week after I dropped the last move and it was wet when I got back. Then it was summer and I went to europe, then I became a barrister, then I had a kid. :shrug:
Excuses excuses. :boohoo: ;)
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He wouldn't swap.
He evolved
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Lessons from the CWIF (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2012/03/lessons-from-cwif.html)
11 March 2012, 10:50 pm
I was really excited about taking part in the CWIF this weekend. And I man really excited, like can't sleep, Disneyland excited. It would be my first international comp for nearly 10 years, And I was feeling quite strong, so hoped I might do OK. This is what I leant...
1) It's OK to tank
And I really tanked. To say I wasn't close to qualifying is a minor understatement. Qualifying and I weren't even on speaking terms. Still, I had a brilliant time, questing round with a great team, and today I got to go to the plantation and climb in the sun with a great group of people (and Will).
(http://photo.blogpressapp.com/photos/12/03/11/s_2882.jpg) (http://photo.blogpressapp.com/show_photo.php?p=12/03/11/2882.jpg)
2) Never give up.
(http://photo.blogpressapp.com/photos/12/03/11/s_2883.jpg) (http://photo.blogpressapp.com/show_photo.php?p=12/03/11/2883.jpg)
Part of the reason for the aforementioned tanking is that I threw in the towel far too early. Almost straight away I had a shocker on two reachy problems which totally shut me down. Two fat zeros, lurking on my scoresheet like toads. After that, I thought I had no chance, and lost my focus and aggression. I started having lots of fun, but making tons of mistakes and not trying nearly as hard as I should have. In fact, looking back, if I'd kept my shit together I'd still not have qualified. But, if I'd kept my shit together and been less short, inflexible and technically inept I probably would have.
3) We are so lucky in the UK...
(http://photo.blogpressapp.com/photos/12/03/11/s_2884.jpg) (http://photo.blogpressapp.com/show_photo.php?p=12/03/11/2884.jpg)
...to have some of the best routesetters in the world. The qualifiers consisted of thirty problems which had to provide enough fun for those who came down for a laugh, and challenge some of the best in the world. They are set on the main circuit section of the Works, so the potential for disgusting "dirt vert" is high. All 30 problems were great, requiring a potent mix of brains and brawn for success. I don't think I've ever competed on problems of such consistently high quality. Chapeau, route setting team!
4) Legs.
Strong legs are useful, as are butt-cheeks, shoulders and (a distant fourth) fingers. As I write this my legs are in agony, and don't even ask about my backside.
5) What good climbers look like...
The display of bendiness, determination and strength I saw from Ned and Barrans today was awe-inspiring. Watching those guys contort their way up the groove of despair in the finals, all I could think was how good they must be in the sack...
6) The Brits are "quite good"
Finally - the Brits won the CWIF! An inspiring effort from Shauna, who dominated the women's field, and brute strength on a stick from Dave Barrans, who squeeked it in the men's. It all came down to the final problem; Dave had climbed three problems, and Guilliane Glarion-Mondet, the French Sideshow Bob lookalike, had to top out on the final problem to win it. It was one of those situations where you're screaming support, but at the same time praying he won't make it. Guillane fought his way to the last move of the last problem, but could only wave at the finishing hold as he flew past it. Barrans Wins!!!
(http://photo.blogpressapp.com/photos/12/03/11/s_2885.jpg) (http://photo.blogpressapp.com/show_photo.php?p=12/03/11/2885.jpg)
(http://photo.blogpressapp.com/photos/12/03/11/s_2886.jpg) (http://photo.blogpressapp.com/show_photo.php?p=12/03/11/2886.jpg)
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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The risk business (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2012/04/risk-business.html)
3 April 2012, 10:03 pm
Those of you who take four hour lunch breaks to surf the web have probably wondered why this blog has had so few posts in recent months? I've heard a few rumours; perhaps I'm working on something big, and have gone dark so it'll be big news when it breaks. More likely; in recent months my life has been boring even to me, so I'm not going to lumber you lot with it. Train, work, sleep. Work, train, sleep. 3! = 6, but even that's an exaggeration; not every way of arranging sleep, train, work is practical.
However, something has cropped up, so I'll share it with the world. Either because I'm a sharing kind of guy, or because I'm an egomaniac whose voice needs to be heard. Your choice - you get the info all the same.
This weekend I've ended up watching two films on a similar theme; the deadly side of motorsport. One was "Madness on Wheels: Rallying's Crazy Years" by none other than climbing's own Rich Heap. You can catch it here (http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b01fcncc/Madness_on_Wheels_Rallyings_Craziest_Years/) for the next few days, at least. It's a great film; by rarely showing the accidents it avoids the uncomfortable rubber-necking feeling it might produce. But there are plenty of accidents here, under the surface. In a few years when several rally drivers, and more spectators were killed, it's hard not to accept that rallying got out of hand. And yet; at the end of the film the drivers involved look back on it like it was some golden age.
All of this pales in comparison with TT: Closer to the Edge, which follows several rider's quests to win the 2010 TT races in the Isle of Man. The TT is quite simply insane. Between 1907 and 2009 there were 237 deaths. Two hundred. And thirty seven. 2.32 deaths per TT. The attrition rate is mind-blowing. We like to think climbing can be a risky business, and yet if there was a similar fatality rate in climbing it would shock and appall us there.
And that got me thinking about how different cultures shape our approach to risk. Two things struck me about the TT. One was that really serious accidents (and I'm talking about the bike exploding at 180mph kind of serious) didn't put racers off. From their hospital beds they vowed to be fit enough to race next year. Since the accidents didn't affect their attitude, I can only assume they've made their peace with death before they race. TT riders have accepted there's a good chance they'll die, and decided to do that anyway. Climbers don't do that. I think it's because climbing is just safe enough that we can avoid it. We can pretend instead that accidents won't happen to us, and the deception works because accidents are (thankfully) rare.
The other thing I noticed was how old some of the TT riders are. Joey Dunlop won 26 TT races, including his last in 2000. He was 48. Shortly afterwards he was killed in a race in Estonia. This didn't seem to be a rare example either; plenty of the top riders were in their 30s or 40s. As climbers, it's rare to see anyone pushing it outside their twenties. There are old climbers, and bold climbers, but there are no old, bold climbers. I used to think this had two causes; that people mellowed with age and found risk unjustifiable, and that the boldest climbers kicked the bucket before they got old. Thinking about the TT, maybe it's because our climbing culture actually discourages risk; sooner or later the young tigers get the message, chill out and start warning the next generation to be careful.
Either way; I also just watched the excellent life on hold (http://outcropfilms.co.uk/), and was impressed by the boldness of the under 30s on their campaign to highball everything they can put a mat under. I just hope they're being careful...
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Wise words Stu. I have often found myself thinking the same as of late, especially when receiving Michele's news.
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Life on Hold (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2012/04/life-on-hold.html)
5 April 2012, 12:54 pm
Two years in the making, the british bouldering film Life on Hold, from Outcrop Films (Nick Brown and Richard Sharpe) is finally available (http://www.outcropfilms.com/shop-2). Obviously I downloaded it straight away. When I went to the shop I got a pleasant surprise. The 720p download available for only £10, which is a bargain price, cheaper than almost any comparable climbing film I can think of.
The film itself starts with a beautifully shot and edited sequence of Ned Feehally on Careless Torque; the tone of which is judged perfectly, with a quiet background of strings and piano accompanying the action. The film then embarks on a tour of Yorkshire, the Peak and Northumberland. For the most part, Ned, Dan Varian and Mickey Page are the stars, but there are cameo appearances from a whole host of world-class boulderers, and Dave Mason.
The filming is beautifully done. Some shots are breathtaking, and Outcrop's now-hallmark time lapses are interspersed between the climbing sequences. This is actually done to great effect, and really fits well in a movie about UK bouldering, where the changeable weather and frustrating conditions are such a big part of any climber's life.
The structure of the film itself is very much "all thriller, no filler"; there's very few interviews and almost no exposition. Generally, this works well, letting the problems be the stars and allowing the climber's personalities to reveal themselves through the action. It's also a good call since some of the people in the film (no names, Ned) are best described as reluctant interviewees. At times, however, it works to the film's detriment. In particular, the film follows a non-linear narrative, cutting away from attempts on, and returning to ascents of, key problems. Without any narration to put this in context it's a little jarring, and hard to follow. Where the narrative works best is where interview audio is overlaid over climbing action - for example Ned expounding his highball philosophy whilst soloing The Pride in the Churnet.
In fact, it's the highballing that is the real draw of this film. Dan and Ned have gained a reputation for bringing a new approach to grit climbing, with increasing higher and higher routes falling to a ground up, above pads approach. Most of the time this is a natural application of modern technology, whilst at times it seems to descend into madness, with crazily high and committing routes being highballed above tiny pieces of foam. Sometimes the film does a great job of capturing the gripping nature of this style; watching Ryan Pasquill and Dan on the Return of the Jedi the tension mounts slowly until Ryan takes a nasty looking fall onto distant pads stacked over jumbled boulders. Watching Ned on the Promise is another occasion. His pads seem impossibly distant and, for once, Ned actually looks scared. Then he falls off and the lob is almost anti-climactic. In fact, this is the biggest problem with the highballs in the film; sometimes the falls look suprisingly tame!
In summary, I really loved this film. It is gorgeous, well-paced and features some truly inspiring ascents of world-class problems. Recommendation: download ASAP.(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-4956126827523935068?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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"and Dave Mason" I just lolled sat outside The Sheaf. Stop looking at me.
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How now round cow?
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One funny turn deserves another (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2012/05/one-funny-turn-deserves-another.html)
7 May 2012, 8:02 pm
Six or seven years ago I returned from a work trip, severely sleep deprived, and crashed out in our Exeter bedsit. A few hours later my wife came into the room to find me awake, and talking nonsense. In hindsight, my unconscious brain was clearly concerned with the inner workings of astronomical cameras, but as I ranted about rows and columns not being properly aligned I became increasingly angry at my wife's refusal to understand me, whilst she became increasingly concerned at my unhinged state of mind. Just before she decided to take me to hospital, something more like conscious thought returned and I slowly began to realise that my mutterings were somewhat deranged.
A few similar attacks occurred over the years, always following heavy work trips in which long series of consecutive night shifts left me floundering when I returned to the UK. Thankfully they are now much less common than they were. The most recent was last year, when on holiday in France I found myself in the bizarre position of completely freaking out at the crag. The sloping ledges beneath Castillon are not a comfortable place to have a picnic, but for experienced rock-cats like myself, they are a pretty tame environment to hang out in. And yet, roping up I felt a growing unease. Alarming thoughts would swim up, unbidden, and I'd shudder as a vision of the knot untying fizzled across my brain. Ten minutes later things came to a head with me hanging on the fifth bolt of my warm-up, sobbing uncontrollably and begging to come down. Thankfully, this has never repeated itself, although this weekend I got a little reminder of this unpleasant occurrence.
Having come home from back-to-back work trips to Hawaii (poor me) and La Palma (I know!) I was feeling pretty drained and jet-lagged. Rather than bang on with the hard limestone we thought a change was in order and this saturday we drove over to N Wales for a day on the slate. To be honest, I thought we'd just pootle about on mid-grade sport routes, and that's what we started out doing, but the great grey bulk of the rainbow slab was like a siren call and we headed down and launched up Pull My Daisy. I had such a great time that it makes me wonder what I've been doing on sport routes all these years! The route is famous for a monster run out in the upper reaches and, to be honest, I only just about held it together. Still, I gave myself a good talking to halfway up and climbed well, even though my head was raging. After that we did another few routes and I drove home feeling really content and relaxed. On Sunday we drive up to Malham - the first time we've been back since the mega-day when Jules ticked Predator and I fluked my way up Bat Route.
Walking into the cove I felt a familiar feeling creeping up on me, along with a growing feeling of unease. It is really upsetting to find yourself in a totally familiar situation having to try really hard to keep your head screwed on. It's a bit like how I imagine the tourists, gingerly stepping their way around the catwalk, must feel. Warming up on the catwalk almost everything would make me flinch - heart-stopping jabs of adrenalin from ropes pulling through the chains, or the sound of laughter. In a bid not to be beaten by this mood we head 'upstairs' and I tie onto the most exposed route at Malham. At 7c, "Free and Easy" takes a slabby line perched in the middle of the cove. Gained by an exposed traverse to the belay of the groove, the route is perched high above the beck, with it's gaggle of neck-craning tourists. Out here I pretty much freaked out totally. Muscles locked taught, only a constant internal litany of swearwords allowed me to bolt-to-bolt the route. Back on the half-height ledge I lay down with my eyes closed and tried and find some equilibrium. It worked enough to allow me to have another go, but I fell off anyway! The unsettling feeling never quite went away, and after Jules had crushed her route (Obsession), we went back down to the Catwalk. By comparison the situation felt quite relaxed, so I was able to climb again, and feel the pressure release with every lap of the familiar routes.
Today I feel back to normal - a long lie in, and a relaxed day of reading, eating and doing chores has let my head settle. Still - a nasty warning of how fragile the mind can be, and a reminder to make sure I rest properly the next time I return from a trip abroad!(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-3110071023875960472?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Very excellent Mr. Stu. Welcome to my world.
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Amen.
And you're not alone.
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hanging on the fifth bolt of my warm-up, sobbing uncontrollably and begging to come down.
Sounds like me on a good day.
I think everyone gets them now and again, I have had them surfing solo before; just an overwhelming feeling that all of a sudden all the unlikely odds of something going wrong were stacking up heavily against me.
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Really interesting stuff, especially since you're a pretty beastly climber. Thanks for sharing.
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It's happened to me on the rock, on the Mountain and deep underwater (and you run out of gas pretty quick when you panic underwater).
Fear is a pretty logical response. What is amazing is that any of us manage to suppress it so well, so often...
Secondly, people with responsible jobs, tend to be people who take responsibility seriously and probably have difficulty switching that "caring" off.
I do.
Intense work, coupled with traveling, especially when two or more different jobs are strung together in one trip, often leave me waking up confused about where I am and unable to relax easily.
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Fascinating to hear that other people get this too. I agree Matt, it's more of a mystery how we manage to block this out most of the time, as it's a perfectly rational response to being high up (or deep down) with so many single points of failure it's not funny.
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Really good post thanks.
It's made me feel a bit better about my last 'moment' halfway up Boulder Ruckle where I needed Mrs Arms to get me out of trouble, (Stop laughing, it could have happened to anyone. It doesn't make me less of a man).
So it seems even really good climbers have bad days, maybe there is hope for me!
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I have had them surfing solo before; just an overwhelming feeling that all of a sudden all the unlikely odds of something going wrong were stacking up heavily against me.
been there, done that!
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Stu,
Great post. Reading again it sounds like you may be suffering from the occaisional Anxiety/Panic attack, especially if it's stress/tiredness related. Cortisol levels high, dopamine and seratonin low.... triggers the fight/flight response and is pretty overwhelming and downright unpleasant.
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Fascinating to hear that other people get this too. I agree Matt, it's more of a mystery how we manage to block this out most of the time, as it's a perfectly rational response to being high up (or deep down) with so many single points of failure it's not funny.
I agree Stu, and am really interested in this ability to cope with fear and danger through a rational / non-rational response (and have been writing an article about it as it happens). My method of dealing with my considerable natural aversion to falling off on the lead, and being high up in general, has always revolved around rational process as much as i can, as I've always felt that the self deception route, although effective in the short term leads to distressing situations (materially and psychologically).
Ultimately though, is this lurking fear at the heart of why committing climbing and adventure in general are so satisfying and fulfilling? It seems to tally well with the concept of percieved risk out of all proportion with the tanglble reward (deep play) - the occasional mega wibble is possibly the price that most of us pay for the 90% of the time we enjoy it?
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For Bennett (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2012/10/for-bennett.html)
3 October 2012, 1:00 pm
I'll bet you've noticed. I've not written anything here. Admit it, you've missed me. The thing is there's only so many tall tales I can spin out of a yarn of "got up, went to work, went training, ate cornflakes". In recent months my life has bored even me, so I figured I'd spare you the same fate. I wasn't even going to write this, but Bennett wanted to see the pictures.
Eventually the training has to be for something - and it was for this.
That's White Zombie in Baltzola there folks. The first 8c to be 'onsighted (http://www.8a.nu/forum/ViewForumThread.aspx?ObjectId=23093&ObjectClass=CLS_UserNewsComment&CountryCode=GLOBAL)'. 78 horizontal moves of pure juggy pleasure. Tell me that's not worth a few hours of endurance training a night? Jules and I were both mega-psyched to have a redpointing holiday, so we preselected our routes. I chose the Zombie, naturellement, whilst Jules picked a nice 8a right in the bowels of the cave. And when I say the bowels of the cave, you know I'm serious. Baltzola is a proper cave. If it's cloudy you need a head torch for the routes in the back. It's dark, steep and full of goat shit. Parisella's devotees - book your tickets today.
Turns out we chose badly - Jules' route had a massive ledge fall off it, removing a rest and replacing it with two hard moves. This bumped the difficulty up a notch. My route had two flaws. Flaw one was that the local climbers were debating if it was 8b+ - a problem they neatly solved by sika'ing over a natural pocket on the crux! Ergo, my route was also a bit harder. Flaw two was more serious - from a cave full of dark shady roof climbs, I chose the only one with a crux in full sun. Muppet.
Still, we both battled valiantly on and suffered through the hot and sticky conditions until the very last day of the trip. With no ticks to show for our week, we were a bit nervous and got to the crag pre-dawn to maximise the number of goes we had before catching our flight. Good call. Whilst I killed the Zombie in the dawn light, Jules had literally minutes to spare, ticking her route on her 6th go up of the day. Hurray for us!
Anyway - all that dull pre-amble is an excuse to post the pictures below. Suffice it to say that Baltzola is amazing and if you like steep climbing and goats (and don't mind the odd bit of sika) you should go there tomorrow.
More pictures here (http://www.flickr.com/photos/stulittle/sets/72157627355361161/).
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rc56Mfq7Bqs/UGw19QzfmiI/AAAAAAAAAFI/T9Kx1D-YhF8/s320/baltzola-1.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rc56Mfq7Bqs/UGw19QzfmiI/AAAAAAAAAFI/T9Kx1D-YhF8/s1600/baltzola-1.jpg)
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-K32slKMhNLQ/UGw1-L1CfOI/AAAAAAAAAFM/NYxYdJdWJiM/s320/baltzola-2.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-K32slKMhNLQ/UGw1-L1CfOI/AAAAAAAAAFM/NYxYdJdWJiM/s1600/baltzola-2.jpg)
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-VK0qEsdC6u0/UGw1-6eAmHI/AAAAAAAAAFY/Hkpwly6BM7U/s320/baltzola-4.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-VK0qEsdC6u0/UGw1-6eAmHI/AAAAAAAAAFY/Hkpwly6BM7U/s1600/baltzola-4.jpg)
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-i2tY3nUtZWI/UGw2AaPfzTI/AAAAAAAAAFc/VQ5bwd4PaLE/s320/baltzola-7.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-i2tY3nUtZWI/UGw2AaPfzTI/AAAAAAAAAFc/VQ5bwd4PaLE/s1600/baltzola-7.jpg)
(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-8092062681041006852?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Great effort!
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Cor, that place looks incredible!
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Effort beast.
I don't think I've done 78 moves in all past week's training.
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Generic blog post title (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2012/10/generic-blog-post-title.html)
13 October 2012, 12:40 pm
I really, really wanted this to be one of those bragging blog posts. You know the type. I'd have started out with lashings of faux-modesty - talked about how my project is nothing special in absolute terms, but its a personal progression for me, etc. Then I'd have a short description of the moves on the project. I'd make it sound really hard, so you knew just how good I was. And then I'd spin my yarn. Add some tension - the "will he, won't he" stuff. Finally, the blog post would finish with my glorious success, no doubt in the face of massively over-hyped difficulties, like a head cold, or bad conditions.
You'll have to wait for that post, but I promise you now that it's coming, because yesterday I fell off the last move of Evolution at Raven Tor. Evolution! When Jerry was working the route, legend holds he told the thronging crowds "there's only three people who can do that move - me, myself and I". Evolution! Home of the tiniest holds on Raven Tor, the crag of tiny tiny holds. And I fell off the goddam last move. Admittedly, Rupert did this about 80 times, but I'm a lot angrier than Rupert, so I'm sure I'll get it soon.
Unfortunately I have to go away for a while. I'm in Manchester airport, waiting for a flight to Chile, where I'll spend a few nights looking for weather outside our solar system, then I'll fly back and crush the shit out of Evolution*. God I love my life.
*please stay dry, please stay dry, please stay dry
Location:Domestic Approach,,United Kingdom (http://maps.google.com/maps?q=Domestic%20Approach,,United%20Kingdom@53.360333,-2.269963&z=10)(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-4368267215396714418?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Hope it stays dry for ya!
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Yeah fuck weather outside our solar system worry about the watcher in Yorkshire. May te weather gods bestow you with a few days of cool mint conditions when you get back
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Good post Stu, I enjoyed that. It sounds a little like some of Andy Kirkpatrick's writing, (which I mean as a compliment).
Yeah fuck weather outside our solar system ... cool mint conditions when you get back
Amen, especially if that coincides with my right foot accepting a rock shoe again.
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Generic blog post title (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2012/10/generic-blog-post-title.html)
13 October 2012, 12:40 pm
I'll spend a few nights looking for weather outside our solar system, then I'll fly back and crush the shit out of Evolution*. God I love my life.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
Read all about it, Read all about it.
FUTURE FORECASTING STAR-GAZER THANKS GOD FOR EVOLUTION
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Astrophysicist claims he can crush the shit out of Evolution!
I'm grassing you up to Dawkins....
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The unbearable dullness of failing (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2012/11/the-unbearable-dullness-of-failing.html)
11 November 2012, 5:05 pm
If the last blog post was a triumphant roar, this is a never-ending scream of agony. It's all gone horribly wrong.
Since my return from Chile I've had five sessions on Evolution, three in the best conditions I've ever had on the route. When I left it felt like a sure thing. Now, every session on it makes it feel further and further away. The problem is the first crux move - an awkward, painful rockover off a high right foot and a dreadful razors edge for the left hand. Even back in September I could do this move in isolation every go. On my last day before going away I climbed through this move from the ground five times in one day. Since my return I have got through it once. Even pulling straight on at the move I can only do it about one in three goes.
What has gone wrong? I don't feel weaker on the holds. If anything I'm stronger than before. But some block - physical or mental - has developed. The move is the first hard move from the floor, so each attempt goes womble, womble, slump. Womble, womble slump. Redpointing on the route now feels like banging my head against a brick wall. Luckily, I've got a pretty solid head from years of sieging - and I'm pretty sure the wall will break first.
Right now I'm trying everything I can to break down the block. I'm stretching out my hips and shoulders, trying different foot positions, getting myself angry on the move. Something will work eventually and I'll get up on the headwall once more. I can still do the route. But it's not the dead cert it once was and success relies on a triptych of good weather, the right training and a bit of luck. Which will make it all the sweeter when it comes...(https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/7729231372129649725-3257696152566702073?l=thesphericalcow.blogspot.com)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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We've all been there... Just gotta keep going!
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I know exactly how you feel.
It will be the best feeling in the world when it all comes together!, stay strong!!
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Stick at it, keep the fucking faith.
Oh, and pull harder!
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Yeah it's the most frustrating thing when a move suddenly gets harder for no apparent reason. :furious:
Good luck Stu.
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Cheers Guys!
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The comeback kid (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2013/09/the-comeback-kid.html)
27 September 2013, 3:17 pm
Where'd he go? Where'd who go? (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0092099/quotes?item=qt0447387)
This blog disappeared because so did my climbing. I think you know the score by now - my finger broke - taking with it my dignity, my will to live and my sense of perspective. Not necessarily in that order.
However, since my finger has started to improve so has my general mood, and my appetite for blogging. I was going to write a big moany blog post about my injury, and how it was all Ben Moon's fault, but I thought you should all read this (http://eveningsends.com/2013/09/hurt-locker/) instead.
Actually being injured was sort of a blessing. Let's play a game where we divide myself into two people. We'll call them 'Ego' and 'The tiny part of me remaining', or 'Bob' - because it's shorter. Ego hated being injured. He kept reading about other people crushing hard routes, or getting stuck into epic seiges and Ego was just as childishly pissed about this as you might imagine. Meanwhile, Bob was having a whale of a time: climbing 5.9s in the desert sun in California, using massive jugs with two fingers in Riglos and remembering how good easy trad climbing is.
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-mF8RQoI2ICE/UkWge3uwnyI/AAAAAAAAAQA/_TIooLEYD9Q/s320/P1000723.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-mF8RQoI2ICE/UkWge3uwnyI/AAAAAAAAAQA/_TIooLEYD9Q/s1600/P1000723.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Bob having a good old time in Riglos[/td][/tr]
[/table]It's been great going tradding again, and it's massively re-inforced my respect for heros like Bransby and McHaffie who are good at it. I have a head made of jelly, which doesn't help. However I am also old and cunning, and this has got me up some classics that I've wanted to do for a long time. For example - check out the gear I found on Ninth Life below - a setup that makes it better protected than the 7b to the right...
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-yIG3R2w1qac/UkWgZZ4MLSI/AAAAAAAAAP4/GeLGfeuvQiM/s320/ninth_life.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-yIG3R2w1qac/UkWgZZ4MLSI/AAAAAAAAAP4/GeLGfeuvQiM/s1600/ninth_life.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Upside down pecker (with nose moulded with Sugru) and some tied together nut keys. Bomber![/td][/tr]
[/table]However, now the finger is getting better and it's time to put fun behind me for a little while and get back to being savage. I'm so excited! My level is truly shocking, but improving fast. In the space of a few weeks I've gone from failing on 8a's to being as strong as Alex Barrows (i.e failing on 8a+'s). The best bit is getting to try really hard again. It sounds stupid but I've missed being pumped so much.
I don't know how to end this blog post, so I'm just going to stop. Hello again.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Good to have you both back, Ego and Bob.
I didn't know about the injury, so, sorry to know and glad to know it's passing.
Keep blogging.
Oh, and you should have called me, I'd have reassured that during your injury I wasn't crushing absolutely anything!
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Do keep writing Stuart. The Bisharat article was interesting and entertaining but your thoughts on injury would be too.
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Do keep writing Stuart. The Bisharat article was interesting and entertaining but your thoughts on injury would be too.
+1
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I thought that Bisherat blog was hilarious. Loving all these blogs about people being injured :
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Were you feeling left out so decided to join the club by smashing your heel up?
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Best Forgotten Crags (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2013/09/best-forgotten-crags.html)
30 September 2013, 8:48 pm
When I was a teenager growing up in Wetherby I used to climb at Almscliffe obsessively. I'd cycle there after school and at weekends and would regularly warm up by climbing the classic HVS Great Western. Being a nerd I used to keep a tally chart of Great Western ascents in the back of my guide. I stopped when I ran out of space, after around 500 ascents. All this is so you know that I am as guilty as anyone of visiting the same old crags and doing the same old routes. What follows is by no means a lecture...
The comeback trail hit two neglected but great crags this weekend. Saturday saw us wading the bracing river which guards Chee Tor, these days best known as the Cornice's recluse neighbour. Chee Tor is a brilliant crag which is actually quite popular, but which seems to revert almost instantly to a dust covered, cobwebby heap of vegetable matter when no-ones looking. Mortlock's Arête is a case in point. With the Chris Craggs seal of approval - "one of the best E4s on limestone in the country" - it is deservedly popular. I know of several ascents in 2012 and probably many this year as well. Nevertheless on Saturday, the Arête looked more like a project for a Sarah Beeny makeover than a 3 star route. After several hours shuffling and brushing and sweeping Jules and I topped out with massive grins. A great route! Thanks to the spring clean I gave it on the way down it's also in pretty good nick now. The same goes for Absent Friends, which I gave a good ground up brushing for Jules, who lead it on my gear.
[tr][td](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7YsUPaqitVs/Ukniu4A7wxI/AAAAAAAAAQQ/SyC6fcdI-Kg/s320/photo+1.JPG) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7YsUPaqitVs/Ukniu4A7wxI/AAAAAAAAAQQ/SyC6fcdI-Kg/s1600/photo+1.JPG)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Thor's Cave. Tourist (and death) trap.[/td][/tr]
[/table]To be honest, we both felt a bit burnt out after our Chee Tor day, so a relaxing Sunday bolt-clipping was in order. We tried to get a posse together for a day at Thor's Cave but no-one was biting. Everyone was certain it would be wet. To be honest, based on the descriptions in the Rockfax I don't blame them. The classic 8a, Thormen's Moth is "almost always wet". What bollocks. Thor's doesn't actually seep that badly. Although it can be condensed out on the hottest of summer days, those who visit after a week or two of dry weather will find a smattering of very special routes which will all be dry.
I had my eye on two John Fullwood nuevo-classics from 2006 - Midgard Serpent and Spear of Odin. Midgard is only 7b+ but actually took me a few efforts, one to work out all the kneebars and upside down leg bar trickery and a couple to actually remember it all ground up. The ascent also had a bit of spice when I broke a fragile crimp on the initial wall and hit the starting ledge with some force. Ouchy. Naturally for Spear of Odin I learnt my lesson and stick clipped the first bolt.
I don't know if Spear has had many ascents, but it is hands down one of the best 7c+s in the country. Athletic climbing up the leaning gray prow lead to a tenuous swing out to a small crimp round the corner and a chunky cross through which brings you to an upside down no-hander on a kneebar/toe hook combination. From the no-hander you can hang bat-like and admire the pillar you've just climbed. Once you've finished posing, some big butch pulls bring you to a cubby-hole in the roof where you can sit and admire your efforts. It's like a bit of Spain brought over to the peak for your climbing pleasure.
Unfortunately it's out of action for a short while. I was wasted from my Midgard efforts and pretty skeptical about my chances so i was chuffed and surprised to find myself in the rest with a full tank of gas. Over-excited, I muffed the sequence out of the rest and fell onto the bolt - which promptly ripped out. Screaming like a hormone-fuelled One Direction fan I swooped towards the shocked tourists and came to a halt, swinging gently about ten feet above their anxious upturned faces. I tried to regain some dignity by acting all casual but I could tell from the look on the two teenage girl's faces that I wasn't fooling anyone.
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/--viTgoI6fBE/UknjIlBcBEI/AAAAAAAAAQg/u76d2lPgGzE/s320/photo+3.JPG) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/--viTgoI6fBE/UknjIlBcBEI/AAAAAAAAAQg/u76d2lPgGzE/s1600/photo+3.JPG)[/td][/tr][tr][td]The offending article[/td][/tr]
[/table]I'll try and get a bolt back in as soon as possible. Until then, there are still plenty of great dry routes at both venues to get stuck into. As for me, I'll see you at the Tor. I've had quite enough of neglected crags for now...
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Yep, pretty sure that's one of the aid bolts.
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Flow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2013/10/flow.html)
7 October 2013, 8:58 pm
Choosing venues at the weekend can be a thorny issue. This saturday looked beautiful on paper, but a quick skim of facebook from the comfort of my bed revealed that those unhinged enough to rise with the dawn had seen a deep inversion layer and valleys thick with cloud. Yet the warm sunshine meant a grit hit was premature. In an attempt to balance choosing the right venue with a desire to go somewhere new we got it half wrong and went to Nudas Tartan.
[tr][td](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-F8VzkTge5hY/UlMaTMaT_7I/AAAAAAAAARM/qIErTrxFkuM/s400/IMG_1499.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-F8VzkTge5hY/UlMaTMaT_7I/AAAAAAAAARM/qIErTrxFkuM/s1600/IMG_1499.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Nudas Tartan - Tarantula[/td][/tr]
[/table]
Nudas Tartan is, it turns out, a great little venue, but not one that is dry in high humidity. We managed to towel off a couple of problems which kept us busy for a little while. I worked out a cunning sequence on Tarantula (above) which turned out not to work, so I took my feet off and campussed it instead. Jules spent some time working out a sequence on the 7b lip traverse Meltdown and then crushed it first try. A good tick for her, since she's not much of a boulderiser.
On Sunday we faced the same conditions dilemma, but I had to go down to Two Tier in Cheedale to try and repeat Rupert's new 8a+, Flow. Opinions on the name vary from "I like it" to "It reminds me of tampons", but everyone is in agreement about the 3* nature of the route. The climbing is a mixture of Rupert's trademark mono-packed gnarl-fest and chunky pulls on big sidepulls before a wildly optimistic lunge brings the climbing to an end.
[tr][td](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-f1EP7ng16co/UlMbNUaBPgI/AAAAAAAAARU/IrexrB5G-hg/s400/Flow2.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-f1EP7ng16co/UlMbNUaBPgI/AAAAAAAAARU/IrexrB5G-hg/s1600/Flow2.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]One the 'wildly optimistic lunge' at the end of Flow, 8a+. Photo: Keith Sharples (http://www.keithsharplesphotography.co.uk/)[/td][/tr]
[/table]When Rupert was working the route I would highlight his inadequacy by comfortably lapping the route from the second bolt, and exhorting him to get it next go, because I wouldn't wait forever. I like to feel that my unique brand of support contributed to the multi-day siege that saw Ru repeatedly falling from the last move. Since he climbed it, the route has seen fast repeats from Dave McLaughlin and James Noble but (as yet), not by me. Given my previous performance I was confident of doing the route first go.
Ah. Mark Twain said: "All you need is ignorance and confidence and success is sure". After two goes falling from the last move I no longer had either. Two more goes falling lower down and failure was damn near assured. I thought of the pressure I'd put on Rupert and tried to feel guilty, but I'm out of practice. Instead I recruited my secret weapon, and got Keith to get his big lens out. With my ego properly motivated, a successful redpoint was a mere formality. Everyone said how great I was* and then it was back to my place for a dinner of fish finger sandwiches and baked beans. Fun times.
*this may have happened only in my head
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Were the fish finger sandwiches real though??
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Brilliant, brilliant stuff.
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Yeah yeah. I could lap it from half way up too.
I'm starting to get worried by my route names. This is the second route that has had menstrual undertones. I renamed Full Bleed (now Seraphim) for the same reason.
Anyway Flow is supposed to be named after a) the river, and b) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flow_(psychology) (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flow_(psychology))
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Were the fish finger sandwiches real though??
Real, but ephemeral.
I'd forgotten the original name for Seraphim. Maybe you should go and see someone?
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That has rather spoiled it. Again.
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Sorry Ru,
Bollinger still thinks it's the hardest 8b in the world, if that cheers you up?
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good work to both the above, watched James climb the route on saturday and it looks brilliant
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I'm starting to get worried by my route names. This is the second route that has had menstrual undertones.
Maybe you're turning into Jon Redhead.
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I'm starting to get worried by my route names. This is the second route that has had menstrual undertones.
Maybe you're turning into Jon Redhead.
Still better than turning into Jon Redflow.
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I like Flow in an Ondra-style monosyllabic kind of way. Like his new 9b in Norway is called 'Move' and the 9b+ 'Change', why waste words?
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The Sean Myles Appreciation Society (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2013/11/the-sean-myles-appreciation-society.html)
20 November 2013, 10:20 pm
One thing I hate is asymmetry in language. You can be underwhelmed, and you can be overwhelmed, so why has no-one been whelmed since the mid 1850s? Similarly, why is no-one ever vincible? I'm mulling this over because of the spectacular grit season so far. It's been an astonishing month, with testpieces like Meshuga getting multiple ascents, and people like Nathan Lee and Ethan Walker climbing a grit E8 or E9 every other day. As if that wasn't enough, Ben Bransby has resurrected Parthian Shot (http://dmmclimbing.com/news/2013/11/parthian-shot-lives-on/). In typical fashion, he's playing it down, but make no mistake - this is a big fucking deal. I can't imagine what it would feel like to be climbing solid 8b above the single remaining RP3. Perhaps the only other route on grit with similarly hard climbing is Captain Invincible, which brings us back to the waffling about language at the start of this post.
[tr][td](http://farm2.staticflickr.com/1309/1469454050_40eb28ceb3.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/12190053@N04/1469454050/)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Captain Invincible - climbs up the middle of this big lump of grit[/td][/tr]
[/table]CI was first climbed by Sean Myles back in 1991. Largely forgotten by today's climbers since he moved to California to go surfing, Sean was one of the strongest climbers in the country back in the early 90s. Anyone who doubts that should go and look at the photo of Sean's back rippling it's way across the Powerband in The Power of Climbing. CI has only seen one repeat, by that other 90's legend Robin 'Tubby' Barker. Tubby is my wife's favourite climber, ever since he turned up at Raven Tor one morning, clearly out of shape and not having climbed for several months. After a desultory warm up, he strolled up Revelations - by far the easiest ascent I've ever seen - warmed down by lapping the Powerband a few times, and then spent the rest of the morning cheerfully taking the piss out of everyone else for being so weak. Unfortunately, in recent years Robin has begun disintegrating, and has snapped several tendons - ouch!
I've always wanted to do CI, and have never tried. This is partly due to the awe I hold the two ascensionists in, and partly because it looks so flipping hard! However, the recent spate of grit sends got me inspired, and so this weekend I trudged over the moor to the Cioch block and threw a rope down, to see what I could see. I think it would be fair to say that things did not go well. In retrospect I had at least hoped to be able to pull off the floor! Pulling past the first few moves I worked out a sequence up the half-height roof, where I found more moves which are apparently impossible. Ignoring these I started working the traverse left into the obvious break. This went more easily - until it didn't - leaving me several moved from the top and with no clue as to how to proceed.
Hmm. I don't think I've ever been on a grit route with such physical difficulty! The gear is not bad, particularly if it's fair game to replace the many pegs in the route. On the other hand I have absolutely no idea how to climb it. On the off chance that Robin reads this blog I'd appreciate any beta (and sorry for the 'tubby' thing)! Or, if any of the keen youths ticking everything in sight fancy joining me for a real challenge, then let's get it done!
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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The Sean Myles Appreciation Society (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2013/11/the-sean-myles-appreciation-society.html)
20 November 2013, 10:20 pm
Or, if any of the keen youths ticking everything in sight fancy joining me for a real challenge, then let's get it done!
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
:lol:
Rally the troops! Sound the bugles! Will the yoofs triumph or will hard grit get hard again?
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I hear (from twitter) some crack addict has been on it recently.
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Really really hard grit
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Great post, be good to see it done.
On the language thing inflammable and flammable really get to me, as they are both the same thing.
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Ah yes, that bugs me as well. Why isn't language logically structured? :whistle:
Grubes - I believe that is true, yes. I will be hitting him up for beta...
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IIRC Sean Myles also have the first flash of Midnight Lightning. I read it somewhere.
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Hey Stu,
I had a few sessions in 2008 trying to ground up this. It isn't a route for winter really as it's effectively a sport route so you need a warm body as due to it being quarried there's not loads to gain from cooler temps, that was mainly my mistake. The bottom boulder problem is fine but committing, monkey up the prow then, get to the off kilter ledges, there's a knacky shoulder move off those to get the big ledge and peg nest. The physical crux i think is leaving the peg nest. Big fat pinch on the arete with LH, drop knee between a footer on the arete/scoop area and other foot on the ledge (might have heel hooked it in the end). roll over and get back 3 in the first slot, then roll out of that, match and head leftwards (pretty basic crimping) upon getting the good pocket at the end (good wires 1 & 2) stick a heel on, lock upto a RH side pull (and if you are me bump LH up the crack then lay one on for the break and take some huge wangers) Pete W has better beta which involves rolling out the pocket into a fingerlock RH, then getting LH higher up the crack in an undercut and walking feet round so you can get the break on offspring static. Brilliant route, super varied and cruxy with rests.
Good luck, would be amazing to see it come into vogue. Ben doing parthian is possibly the only route on eastern grit to surpass it when it comes to difficulty. Fagus Sylvatica close call too maybe but never got on that. You forgot Welford and his Mother of Pearl too for the nails old farts grit club. How about Barker doing Transcendance super fast and downgrading it! only repeat still... Brilliant stuff
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Cheers Dan.
Barker was and still is a legend. Good call about Mother of Pearl too - I'd forgotten that!
Nice beta by the way. Sadly, that's pretty much what I'd worked out. On the crux by the peg nest I can climb it with a heel on the ledge pretty easily, but can't climb into that position. Will take a look at the drop knee. Nice to know that Pete is going further left on the traverse - I was trying it your way and I'm about a foot short of being able to span between the undercut and the offspring break! No wonder you were taking so many lobs.
What do you think about replacing the pegs BTW? I think they're OK at the moment, but replacing would ensure lots of attempts, if not repeats!
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Cheers Dan.
Good call about Mother of Pearl too - I'd forgotten that!
Starts with a dyno, don't do it to yourself, Stu
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A walk on the wild side (groan) (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/01/a-walk-on-wild-side-groan.html)
30 January 2014, 7:32 pm
Ok, this looks bad. Don't you think I know that? No blog for ages and then the minute I tick something - Oh look! It's worse than face bragging (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Facebrag). I don't care, I'm doing it anyway.
So, the Costa Blanca. My perception is that it's something of a faded glory, somewhere old-hat that no-one really goes to any more. Turns out, of course, that my perception is totally wrong. It's still just as busy and popular as ever - and justifiably so, since it offers more high-quality low-grade climbing than almost every other Spanish venue. I'd spent a while here back at the turn of the century, but never really got to climb at the area show-piece, sector Wild Side, since it was banned at the time. Jules and I booked a fortnight's holiday, staying at the Orange House. A fortnight! I can't remember the last time I had two whole weeks just to go climbing...
The Orange House was a great base. At first, I was a bit miffed to be surrounded by English speakers; english at the crag, english at the house. In the end though, the friendliness of the 'oranges' who run the house and the other guests more than made up for it, and I'm glad we chose it. The view was pretty nice too.
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-X-sHDiWTOYU/UuqbnHja-5I/AAAAAAAAAUU/wicUxAmUBi8/s1600/IMG_1780.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-X-sHDiWTOYU/UuqbnHja-5I/AAAAAAAAAUU/wicUxAmUBi8/s1600/IMG_1780.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Finestrat, from the Orange House[/td][/tr]
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Wild Side did not disappoint either. Its a great crag. People had described it as 'British', so I was expecting something crimpy, but really it's got a very slopey right-hand-side and a left hand side that offers tufa-style climbing. It's British only in the sense that many of the routes are not that long (think left-hand side of Malham) and are quite punchy, with distinct cruxes. Oh, and of course it's British in the sense that it's packed with Brits. We had a lot of familiar faces to climb with, and the days Seb was at the crag were particular highlights. The spanish love his dog impressions.
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-1ICd63DFoL0/UuqoCQYhY2I/AAAAAAAAAU8/GNEPKTdpyX4/s1600/IMG_1783.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-1ICd63DFoL0/UuqoCQYhY2I/AAAAAAAAAU8/GNEPKTdpyX4/s1600/IMG_1783.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Seb, showing the rest of us how to warm-up[/td][/tr]
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This was the first climbing trip I'd had since recovering from my injury at the end of 2013. Before we came out I'd had a fitness assessment at Coach Randall's, and I'd been surprised to see that despite a relative lack of training my level was pretty solid. Since then I'd managed to get a month of serious hard work in, so I was really keen to push it this trip and not coast along on low-grade 8's like I usually do. With that in mind I set out to try some of the harder routes at the crag.
[tr][td](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-lDUCKE-08Uc/Uuqhgn-0rxI/AAAAAAAAAUg/w2p-KNxYb-Q/s1600/IMG_1843.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-lDUCKE-08Uc/Uuqhgn-0rxI/AAAAAAAAAUg/w2p-KNxYb-Q/s1600/IMG_1843.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]On the upper crux of Pintoreta[/td][/tr]
[/table]Much to Jules' disgust this resulted in a fair amount of ticking. This is how it would usually go. I try a route, and spend a day moaning about how it was impossible; the moves were too hard, the climbing didn't suit, I wasn't recovering enough. Jules of course would try to be encouraging and reassure me I'd be OK. This made me angry. Jules and I have a brief barney and then make up. Good nights sleep. Route ticked next day.
In the end it turned out to be my most productive climbing trip by a country mile. I did a couple of 8c's quite quick - Espacio Tiempo and Pintoreta. Both were excellent, if a little manufactured. Oddly I thought I'd walk up Pintoreta, but despite getting through the bottom 'crux' first go, I had immense trouble with the '8a' upper section, which featured massive spans between invisible wide pinches. By contrast I thought I wouldn't get up Espacio at all, as I was getting shut down by a hard move at the very top, but I surprised myself by doing the route on my second day, crushing the "impossible" move the first time I reached it.
As well as a bit of easier climbing and some 8a and 8a+ onsights, the highlight/low-point of the trip occurred on an 8b+ called Septiembre. Interestingly, Rockfax have this in their guide as 8b+ and a "Top 50" route, despite the fact that it's very soft at the grade, and the upper wall is climbed entirely on holds which are both grim, and artificial.
[tr][td](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-7JNEtlQEkxY/UuqjkfmNwlI/AAAAAAAAAUo/N1aPNfb3sQQ/s1600/IMG_1766.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-7JNEtlQEkxY/UuqjkfmNwlI/AAAAAAAAAUo/N1aPNfb3sQQ/s1600/IMG_1766.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]A local chap pretending he's Steve Mac on Septiembre[/td][/tr]
[/table]Anyway, after doing Pintoreta I was keen for another project, but didn't fancy something quite as hard so I thought I'd put the draws in Septiembre. I bimbled up until I got to a hard move, grabbed the draw and sat down. Then I looked at the climbing above and realised that the hard move was basically the last on the route. Pulling immediately back on, I climbed to the top. I felt a bit in shock. I think it was 50/50 whether I'd have done the move on the onsight, but I'm pretty sure I would have, and sure I'd have got to the top after that. To be honest, I tried to be angry at myself for blowing the onsight, but it was a level of performance so far above what I expect of myself that I was just really pleased it was even a possibility. It was a bit of an eye-opener, and I'm certainly not going to make the same mistake again. I even had an onsight go on Espacio as a result. It went terribly, but it seems you never know...
In the meantime, Jules was having one of those unfortunate trips where everything seems to go wrong. I think her level has shot up massively, and had things gone just a little differently she would have come home with quick ticks of at least three 8th grade routes. Sadly, though she'll have to wait for the next trip to see all her hard work bear fruit.
Now it's a break from climbing for a little while, as a work trip beckons. After that it's the return of top-flight competition to the Foundry, with the mighty F-BO (http://www.foundryclimbing.com/2013/11/21/f-bo14-open-for-entries/). It should be an exciting comp - after all the title of King of the Wave is up for grabs...
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-yNpb5bU6Sxo/UuqnhYkNR6I/AAAAAAAAAU0/meu-te0xzac/s1600/IMG_1857.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-yNpb5bU6Sxo/UuqnhYkNR6I/AAAAAAAAAU0/meu-te0xzac/s1600/IMG_1857.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Hasta La Vista, Sella[/td][/tr]
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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The jet-set lifestyle (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/01/the-jet-set-lifestyle.html)
30 January 2014, 8:53 pm
I will be in the UK in January for exactly 3 days. Before the Sella holiday I was observing at my favourite telescopes on La Palma, in the Canary Islands. Since then I've been at another observatory, but in a slightly more exotic location - Doi Inthanon, in Northern Thailand.
Doi Inthanon is the highest point in Thailand, and it's where the Thai's have chosen to build their first professional observatory. Building an observatory like this allows the Thai's to strengthen their technological industries, and to improve collaborations with international scientists. Which is where I come in. I'm lucky enough to work with Prof Vik Dhillon in Sheffield, who's a bit of a top boffin when it comes to designing cameras for astronomy. We've entered into an agreement with the Thais, in which we provide them with a state-of-the-art camera, and they provide us with 30 nights of observing time each year.
[tr][td](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kh5KpIhOMX8/Uuq2UZqbkdI/AAAAAAAAAVM/23I-FqXCJDc/s1600/P1010049.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kh5KpIhOMX8/Uuq2UZqbkdI/AAAAAAAAAVM/23I-FqXCJDc/s1600/P1010049.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]The 2.4m Thai National Telescope[/td][/tr]
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The telescope is certainly in a very nice place - Doi Inthanon is a national park, home of the Karen hill tribe and site of many waterfalls and protected "cloud forest". And therein lies the snag. If you know anything about astronomy you'll know that clouds are not good news. And Doi Inthanon is not entirely un-cloudy or wet. In fact, wikipedia tells us
"The summit experiences average year-round temperatures in the low to mid teens (Celsius) and high humidity...flora includes evergreen cloud forest, sphagnum bog, and deciduous dipterocarp forest."
I'll be honest, all that cloud and humidity does hamper the observatory somewhat. Frustratingly the sky is often perfectly clear, but the telescope cannot observe due to high humidity. This is what is going on tonight, giving me the time to write this blog.
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-GHKQS2vr4jU/Uuq2WmDJ5UI/AAAAAAAAAV4/HTXdbGMhSIQ/s1600/stupa.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-GHKQS2vr4jU/Uuq2WmDJ5UI/AAAAAAAAAV4/HTXdbGMhSIQ/s1600/stupa.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]The twin Chedis, Naphamethinidon and Naphaphonphumisiri. Also - note clouds.[/td][/tr]
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[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-KSuX9qIfnGg/Uuq2VOBh6yI/AAAAAAAAAVo/KLWfe8ttD7w/s1600/P1010081.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-KSuX9qIfnGg/Uuq2VOBh6yI/AAAAAAAAAVo/KLWfe8ttD7w/s1600/P1010081.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]A bit 'o' scenery for you[/td][/tr]
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Apart from the trees and clouds, and the excitement of eating spicy noodle soup for breakfast, life at Doi Inthanon is much like life at any other observatory. The long shifts give me just enough time to get six or seven hours of sleep, eat breakfast and then put in another long shift. It's a shame there's no time to explore, or visit some of the local villages. It's even more of a shame because Doi Inthanon is a massive lump of granite, and there's some pretty decent looking cliffs scattered about, clean and unclimbed. I'm not sure whether they're accessible, or if I'll get chased off the land by farmers with machetes but I do intend at some point to recruit some local climbers and head off for a look.
[tr][td](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-3-K1iFHGEcw/Uuq2VSj4LQI/AAAAAAAAAVs/Raf4ZRLiCW4/s1600/P1010110.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-3-K1iFHGEcw/Uuq2VSj4LQI/AAAAAAAAAVs/Raf4ZRLiCW4/s1600/P1010110.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Yes, it's a telescope. And some astronomers[/td][/tr]
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[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Iid5gszeEuk/Uuq2USRxuHI/AAAAAAAAAVc/6Bo9tW7AEXQ/s1600/P1010060.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Iid5gszeEuk/Uuq2USRxuHI/AAAAAAAAAVc/6Bo9tW7AEXQ/s1600/P1010060.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Forests and waterfalls - not the first thing you look for in an observatory site.[/td][/tr]
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And speaking of climbing, I haven't forgotten F-BO. I know Will Atkinson will be thinking he's in with a chance, but I have my portable fingerboard that Ned made me, and a whole load of creative ways of using it to simulate "real" training. So I'm keeping in pretty good shape and, what with the spicy noodles for breakfast, losing a few pounds too. F-BO, here we come...
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ARfyx9tuEos/Uuq2Vw_A_dI/AAAAAAAAAVw/-MttKosh-wk/s1600/fingerboard.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ARfyx9tuEos/Uuq2Vw_A_dI/AAAAAAAAAVw/-MttKosh-wk/s1600/fingerboard.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]All I need is a fingerboard, and a beam to hang her off[/td][/tr]
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Educate a luddite, what is F-BO?
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The Foundry Bouldering open comp taking place this weekend in Sheffield:
http://www.foundryclimbing.com/ (http://www.foundryclimbing.com/)
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Thanks Tom. I guess I'm not in the "in crowd". Might stick to doing the TEBL :)
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Educate a luddite, what is F-BO?
is this testament to what advertising in the sponsors forum (http://ukbouldering.com/board/index.php/topic,23616.0.html) achieves? :-[
Thanks Tom. I guess I'm not in the "in crowd". Might stick to doing the TEBL :)
You can be in the 'in crowd' if you pay £10 and turn up on Sat, now that's value.
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Educate a luddite, what is F-BO?
is this testament to what advertising in the sponsors forum (http://ukbouldering.com/board/index.php/topic,23616.0.html) achieves? :-[
:lol: @ the power of advertising.
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You can be in the 'in crowd' if you pay £10 and turn up on Sat, now that's value.
Thanks, I'll pass. I'm washing my hair.
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Ok, you can just pay and not turn up, how does that sound?
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Ideal! Submit a blank scorecard, or turn up and fail on everything - end result is the same. It's not the winning it's the not taking part that counts.
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F-BO14 (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/02/f-bo14.html)
7 February 2014, 4:07 pm
(http://www.foundryclimbing.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/Facebook_banner.jpg) (http://www.foundryclimbing.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/Facebook_banner.jpg)
Tomorrow is the long awaited F-BO 14 competition (http://www.foundryclimbing.com/fbo14/), when the strongest boys and girls will compete to see who will be crowned King and Queen of the Wave. There was a time once when that crown really meant something - a time when the best climber in the Foundry could lay claim to being the best climber in the world. A time of Hard Plastic (http://www.slackjaw.co.uk/climbingfilms/hardplastic.html).
In those heady days, a big foundry comp would see angry young men with big purple heads go up against the best climbers in the world. Pedro Pons, prehensile and powerful; Chris Sharma, fresh faced and stoned; Arnaud Petit, weak and drop-kneed (the Alex Barrows of his day) - all would turn up to the Foundry and see if they could beat Neil Travers and his lucky pants. Something tells me tomorrow won't be as big a deal as the fabled FIBOs, but I hope the big guns turn up nonetheless. King of the wave is still a prize to be lusted after, and Rich Heap will be there filming the hard plastic sequel. Plus, rumour has it that Barrows will be judging a problem, so there's an opportunity to kick him in the teeth if you cut loose hard enough. On the other hand, I will be there, so you'll have to give up on the idea of actually winning...
Entries on the day are possible, and we needn't mention that the weather will be amenable to indoor bouldering. Plus, the are stuffed Mammoth's available as spot prizes. So get a good night's sleep (you'll need it) and I'll see you at the Foundry.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Nice to see The Pons getting a name check.
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Everyone's favourite action man lookalike
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One of my few "rockstars I have met" claims. He was pulling so hard I'm sure he made the crag steeper that day. Nice guy.
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F-BO! (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/02/f-bo.html)
17 February 2014, 9:57 pm
After all the excitement, did F-BO14 live up to the hype? Is that even possible? The original FIBO international comps at the Foundry were the reason I got into competing in the first place, and led to a brief and ignominious career at the world cups. With the title of King of the Wave once more up for grabs I was desperate to put a good showing in. For the first time in a while I actually didn't sleep well before a comp, such was my excitement level!
The day itself was fantastic. The routesetting team of Napier, Bishton and Feehally had done themselves proud and the qualifying problems were butch and bizarre in equal measure. Other people have blogged about the comp in detail including the Foundry (http://www.foundryclimbing.com/2014/02/12/foundry-bouldering-open-2014/)themselves, and competitors Ethan Walker (http://ethanwalkerclimbing.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/the-competition-game.html) and Gracie Martin (http://graciemartinclimber.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/retro-comp.html), and there's an excellent set of photos on the Foundry's Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.612131882193700.1073741834.204281569645402&type=1). Slackjaw Films even revisited their seminal Hard Plastic, and made a short film (http://youtu.be/AufZzqExCaY) of the event. In the end I was extremely lucky to get to climb in the final. Not only did Ben Moon retire after crushing qualification, but I scraped my way up the harder problems in qualifying by the skin of my teeth.
[tr][td](https://scontent-a-lhr.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/t1/995887_612133302193558_1329288637_n.jpg) (https://scontent-a-lhr.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/t1/995887_612133302193558_1329288637_n.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]90's legend Richie "fragile" Patterson holding it together in qualifying. Credit: Paul Bennett[/td][/tr]
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In the final it was a similar story. The strength wasn't there to enable me to do well and other climbers were definitely stronger. At the end of the first two boulders I'd barely managed to get off the floor and was feeling well and truly beaten.
[tr][td](https://scontent-a-lhr.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/t1/1017565_612134218860133_1136047050_n.jpg) (https://scontent-a-lhr.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/t1/1017565_612134218860133_1136047050_n.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Shut down on P1. Credit: Paul Bennett[/td][/tr]
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In the end, however, I had some luck on the last two problems and managed to scrape my way up them. This was good enough for third place and a generous prize, thanks to the Foundry. Martin Smith and Ethan, in first and second respectively, were much much better than me on the day but let's not dwell on that. Instead, I want to talk a little bit about what changed after the first two problems to allow me to get up anything at all.
[tr][td](https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/t1/14835_612139455526276_1837622960_n.jpg) (https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/t1/14835_612139455526276_1837622960_n.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Getting angry on P3. Credit: Paul Bennett[/td][/tr]
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The change can be summed up with three little words. A-ggre-ssion. I went back into isolation after the second problem and gave myself a bloody good talking to. And I came out and tried the third problem a different climber. It's so important in comps to come out and really want it, but how can you do that when things aren't going your way? Everyone has their tricks (I got Graeme Alderson to give me a punch in the chest), but I reckon the U.S ski team are on to a bit of a winner.
Until Dec 2013, Pete Lavin (aka 'Baby Huey') was employed by the US ski team to stand behind skiers at the start gate, and shout at them. Loud. Don't believe me? - check out Bode Miller on the receiving end...
With the CWIF just around the corner, it's worth pointing out that Huey is probably available for hire, since he left the team following the appointment of a new austrian coach (http://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/olympics/2012/12/31/austrian-coach-andreas-evers-usa-ski-team/1801457/). Failing that I'm sure I could hire Grimer to stand on the edge of the mats shouting encouragement. I'm going to be unstoppable...
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Does he shout at them in Austrian instead?
Great effort finishing 3rd. I was really impressed by Ethan, very lean and looking strong (and not someone I'd have put money on placing so highly in a comp such as that)!
It's funny what you say about anger; I watched anger/frustration/aggression absolutely devastate another persons performance tonight at the last comp in the bouldering league. It must be hard to 'perform' (ooh err) in modern day comp finals with all of the commotion that now goes with it?
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You on Problem 4 is the best bit of that video - how the hell did you get in that position in the first place?! :2thumbsup:
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You on Problem 4 is the best bit of that video - how the hell did you get in that position in the first place?! :2thumbsup:
The problem is still up. It seems getting out of it is the harder part (although most people I've seen try it have a few inches in stature on Stu to aid getting into that position in the first place).
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They're also using features that were out of bounds in the comp :worms:
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Yeah, extricating yourself from that mess is the hard part and I still have the strained buttocks to prove it.
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Yeah, extricating yourself from that mess is the hard part and I still have the stained buttocks to prove it.
fixed
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Do you CWIF? (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/03/do-you-cwif.html)
20 March 2014, 2:11 pm
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Tw9MvR7pUJE/Uyrw4K44sZI/AAAAAAAAAYk/sIyXvVoUJnw/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-03-20+at+13.44.31.png) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Tw9MvR7pUJE/Uyrw4K44sZI/AAAAAAAAAYk/sIyXvVoUJnw/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-03-20+at+13.44.31.png)
In 2011, buoyed by a run of great results in the Foundry winter bouldering I entered the CWIF. My first international comp since the early 00's. I tanked hugely.
In 2012 the same thing happened. After a winter of handing Will Atkinson's ass to him on a silver plate I entered the CWIF (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.co.uk/2012/03/lessons-from-cwif.html) once more. Will scored 221 and narrowly missed the final. I scored 198 and narrowly missed every hold I jumped for.
In 2013 I was injured.
In 2014, following a great result in the F-BO bouldering comp I entered the CWIF once more. You can see where this is going, can't you?
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-DxWd5cDAdFI/Uyrw4FDOqlI/AAAAAAAAAY0/vqoFgACt60k/s1600/IMG_0005_2.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-DxWd5cDAdFI/Uyrw4FDOqlI/AAAAAAAAAY0/vqoFgACt60k/s1600/IMG_0005_2.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]CWIF problems need technique, balance and nonchalance. And a cuppa. Nick Brown shows how it's done.[/td][/tr]
[/table]Every year I expect something different, and every year I go home surprised by how much of climbing doesn't depend upon campus strength at all. On Thursday before this year's competition such was my prowess on the Foundry campus board that the locals were awed - I genuinely thought Mark Tomlinson was going to make me a marriage proposal. And then on Saturday I watched climbers who couldn't 1-4-7 to escape a sleuth of angry bears, smoothly negotiate volumes and rock overs that spat me off repeatedly. In the end I finished with 205 points - my best CWIF performance to date, and enough for a mighty 66th place.
You'd think that I'd be crushed and dispirited. Then again, you'd think that after three years I'd have learned to expect it. The truth is that the weekend has got me completely psyched for competitions again! Performance aside I had such a great time on Saturday. There was a great and friendly scene and the problems were excellent. Really and truly amazing - if those problems were outside on a single font circuit it would be the best circuit in font. As usual they required gymnastic strength, subtle footwork and impeccable route reading skills in equal measure. Of these attributes I possess none, but determination I possess in spades. So I'm going to stretch a bit, do a lot of push ups and enter the British Bouldering Championships for the first time in over 10 years. With a bit of luck I might not even come last...
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-4Dms4KEGe9M/Uyrw4HUPnBI/AAAAAAAAAY4/tqrkpmXdsvc/s1600/IMG_0004.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-4Dms4KEGe9M/Uyrw4HUPnBI/AAAAAAAAAY4/tqrkpmXdsvc/s1600/IMG_0004.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Team Midget Gems at the CWIF: L-R Mrs Littlefair, Mr Littlefair, a pack of midget gems, Ella Russel, John Dudley[/td][/tr]
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Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Weather on other worlds (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/03/weather-on-other-worlds.html)
25 March 2014, 12:43 pm
It's not all climbing you know. The last 40 hours I've been travelling to Sydney to do some observing on an old favourite telescope of mine. Over the last few years, various astronomers across the globe have been working hard to directly measure the brightness of planets orbiting other stars - so called exoplanets. This is relatively 'easy' at infrared wavelengths but is incredibly difficult in optical light, where the planet is much, much, much fainter than the star it orbits. This matters because the best way of measuring the planet's brightness is to look for the minuscule dip in brightness of the combined light from the star and planet, when the planet disappears behind the star.
The dip in brightness is so small because the planet is so faint - the often used analogy is that it's like trying to see the change in overall brightness when a firefly disappears behind a searchlight. Nevertheless, over the last few years we have honed our techniques and we are starting to routinely measure the brightness of exoplanets in optical light - like the example below.
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-dlRkHgOtG5k/UzF3v_RJSqI/AAAAAAAAAZU/HeEEtFvgg0U/s3200/F1.large.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-dlRkHgOtG5k/UzF3v_RJSqI/AAAAAAAAAZU/HeEEtFvgg0U/s3200/F1.large.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Light vs time for the exoplanet system WASP-12. The dip (a fraction of one percent) is caused by the planet disappearing behind the star.[/td][/tr]
[/table]The thing is, as we have more and more measurements like this, a puzzle is starting to emerge. It's becoming quite common for different groups to disagree on the brightnesses of exoplanets. An example is shown below - look at the furthest left datapoint. There's two measurements of brightnesses for the same planet by different groups, and they don't agree.
[tr][td](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xhG_eI5LA1c/UzF3v5aUaQI/AAAAAAAAAZY/-OgOEuCQjdM/s3200/F4.large.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xhG_eI5LA1c/UzF3v5aUaQI/AAAAAAAAAZY/-OgOEuCQjdM/s3200/F4.large.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Brightness of planet as a function of wavelength. The furthest left points are two measurements of the optical brightness[/td][/tr]
[/table]There are only really two possibilities here. The first is that we are not as good at measuring the brightness of exoplanets as we think we are. The apparent disagreement in this case is caused by us overstating how confident we are in our measurements. The second possibility is that the planets really are changing in brightness over time - or, to put it another way - we could be seeing weather on the surface of planets around other stars. My money is on the first explanation - but there's a really obvious way to check. That's to measure the same event from many different telescopes. Since it's the same event all the different telescopes should give the same answer, and if they don't then our techniques are not as good as they thought they were.
That's what I should have been doing tomorrow night, but looking at the weather it looks like I might be watching movies on iTunes instead. Now, Sydney is a long way to come to work one night and find it is cloudy, but I'm not too depressed because I'm taking a two week climbing holiday afterwards, so if the science doesn't play ball I've got this to look forward to...
(http://www.planetmountain.com/Rock/falesie/103/103.jpg) (http://www.planetmountain.com/Rock/falesie/103/103.jpg)
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Things I Will Remember About Oz (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/04/things-i-will-remember-about-oz.html)
17 April 2014, 5:32 pm
Gritstone is nearly perfect isn't it? All that friction, the fluid motion. A shame it's so small. Wouldn't it be amazing if there was somewhere with massive grit crags. Somewhere with a bit more variety; multi-pitch grit, steep grit, sport grit. A place like that would be all the rage, wouldn't it?
I've just returned from a two week climbing trip in the Blue Mountains. Alright, it's not Stanage, but the rock is as close to quarried grit as makes no difference. I'm sure geologists would quibble, but this is grit in all but name. Originally I had planned to write a few blogs whilst I was there but it turns out Australia isn't a civilised country and it's really hard to find coffee and wifi after 5pm, so I didn't bother. Instead I am blessing you with this summary of things I remember about the trip, in a handy list format.
[tr][td](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-FvTjZQNsmVM/U1AFpWbbxjI/AAAAAAAAAbI/pwq0LHxKQTE/s1600/OZ16.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-FvTjZQNsmVM/U1AFpWbbxjI/AAAAAAAAAbI/pwq0LHxKQTE/s1600/OZ16.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]The Blueys. Great rock, lots of trees. And a whole heap of rain.[/td][/tr]
[/table][li]The Weather
Hmm. Less enamoured here. For the two weeks we were there we had two days without rain. And we had all sorts of rain. We had drizzle. We had bowel-shaking thunderstorms, which we got to watch from an enjoyable distance and a disconcerting proximity. We had monotonous downpours, sudden squalls and even one very isolated shower, when it rained from a 100ft patch of cloud drifting past us in an otherwise perfect cobalt sky. When it wasn't raining, we were treated to gritstone climbing in 20 degree heat and 100% humidity.
[tr][td](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7D8-rTIST4o/U1AFnR1cWWI/AAAAAAAAAa0/01hwLyaFzRo/s1600/OZ04.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7D8-rTIST4o/U1AFnR1cWWI/AAAAAAAAAa0/01hwLyaFzRo/s1600/OZ04.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Lovely.[/td][/tr]
[/table]Still, thanks to the impermeability of the rock and general steepness we still got to climb every day we wanted. Which brings me to number[/li]
[li]The Climbing
It was steep, it was rough, it was tough. There were rock overs, massive sideways dynos, the crimpiest crimps that ever crumped. I absolutely loved it. I also got completely and utterly shut down. I didn't climb anything harder than 29 (8a), didn't onsight anything harder than 27, fell off a few 24s. Worst performance ever, but some stellar routes made it a great trip. My favourite was probably Super Duper Goo - the route in the previous blog post. I didn't quite get the beautiful light that Steve Mac is enjoying in that photo, instead I swung through the roof in zero visibility and a raging thunderstorm, but it was epic and memorable nonetheless. Other favourites were the mega-steep The Way of All Flesh and Don't Believe the Tripe, and everything on the gorgeous and subtle vertical walls of Porter's Pass.
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-rkwYL8g5raQ/U1ANuYCNS1I/AAAAAAAAAbs/Bwc1rGmEsgU/s1600/OZ30.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-rkwYL8g5raQ/U1ANuYCNS1I/AAAAAAAAAbs/Bwc1rGmEsgU/s1600/OZ30.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]One taped finger for each day on.[/td][/tr]
[/table]
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-IK4-G-CzArs/U1AMG87Y1UI/AAAAAAAAAbg/87TbhGL-EUA/s1600/IMG_2231.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-IK4-G-CzArs/U1AMG87Y1UI/AAAAAAAAAbg/87TbhGL-EUA/s1600/IMG_2231.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]The Tube, Centennial Glen - 24[/td][/tr]
[/table][/li]
[li]Sydney
Probably one of the only cities I could imagine living in. We had some lovely days out in Sydney, with the only downside being the assault we received at the hands of the Seagulls in Manly. [/li]
[/list]So - that was Oz. I'll definitely go back as soon as I can afford it, and just hope that I won't get such a spanking next time!
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-oxQQlH4XGv8/U1AFp7emxsI/AAAAAAAAAbQ/aJ3nnUJv3Zg/s1600/OZ28.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-oxQQlH4XGv8/U1AFp7emxsI/AAAAAAAAAbQ/aJ3nnUJv3Zg/s1600/OZ28.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]The morning view from our tent. It rained 10 minutes later.[/td][/tr]
[/table]
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Puk4idRkW_c/U1AFnyfJbHI/AAAAAAAAAa8/qGtWZZAi47M/s1600/OZ10.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Puk4idRkW_c/U1AFnyfJbHI/AAAAAAAAAa8/qGtWZZAi47M/s1600/OZ10.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Classic connies at Diamond Falls[/td][/tr]
[/table]
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4ARuOmqgXF8/U1AFoKVKPQI/AAAAAAAAAaw/th1XFV5yRYg/s1600/OZ06.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4ARuOmqgXF8/U1AFoKVKPQI/AAAAAAAAAaw/th1XFV5yRYg/s1600/OZ06.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]The in-aptly named 'log of death' at the Freezer[/td][/tr]
[/table]
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Opening the account (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/04/opening-account.html)
22 April 2014, 9:59 am
For about three years now I've had one particular route in the back of my mind. That's because it's the best hard sport route on UK limestone, bar none. To be honest, many of the hard sport routes in the UK are minging - the holds are too small and nasty, or the rock is a bit poor. Some of the best climbing are on traverses (like Dog's Dinner) or arbitrary link ups in Parisella's Cave or the Tor, but it's hard to get psyched for them, unless you are Alex Barrows (http://alexbarrowsclimbing.blogspot.co.uk/2014/04/stamina-boys.html).
The exception that proves the rule is Rainshadow. Steve Mac put up this masterpiece in 2003, and it's seen two repeats since then. It is flipping amazing. The rock is damn near perfect and the moves are funky. Most importantly all of the holds are nice - no grim crimps here!
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-x7vWH3OayZc/U1Y6KhyN-2I/AAAAAAAAAb8/kruVE65l_DE/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-04-22+at+10.36.18.png) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-x7vWH3OayZc/U1Y6KhyN-2I/AAAAAAAAAb8/kruVE65l_DE/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-04-22+at+10.36.18.png)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Steve Mac on Rainshadow. Screenshot from Gresham's Training DVD.[/td][/tr]
[/table]The route climbs Raindogs (best 8a at Malham) to a poor shake below a Font 7c+ boulder problem through the roof, with burly 8a/8a+ climbing to get to the belay above. It's a BIG step up from anything I've done to-date. Together with Tom Randall I've been basing my training over the last three years around getting into good enough shape to do this route. To be honest, a lot has gone wrong over that time period, and I had to sit out almost all of last year, and a few months of this one, due to finger injuries. Maybe that will prevent me from realising my goal this year, but the time has finally come to start trying, and see how close I can get.
This weekend I spent three days on the route. It's amazing, but so, so hard. The roof boulder problem is so beta intensive, it took me the whole weekend to work out a sequence. I'm using Steve's heel-toe sequence, which no-one else uses, but after trying several different pairs of Sportiva shoes I've got the knack and think it's the way forward. Raindogs at least is easy, but there's a heartbreaker move at the very top that's got me really worried. The whole deal may be too hard, and perhaps my ego has written a cheque my body can't cash. Too bad. I'm supposed to be back at work, but I can't think of anything else. I see Rainshadow holds in my cup of tea. I load google to search for work papers and somehow find myself watching Rainshadow videos. For better or worse I'm committed to this project! See you at Malham...
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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They shoot horses, don't they? (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/05/they-shoot-horses-dont-they.html)
5 May 2014, 6:07 pm
My connective tissue is rotting. I think it's a standing joke amongst other climbers that I'm always injured. Certainly when I meet people I haven't seen for a while, the first question they ask is 'are you injured?'. Currently I am nursing: one finger injury, occurring on the day after F-BO; torn knee ligaments, occurring on the day after the CWIF; and a sprained ankle, which came on during a gentle walk. All this makes me feel pretty decrepit. There's nothing like being old to make you feel old.
The *good* news is that all my aches and pains are manageable enough to begin training once again, so with a Coach-Randall-Approved Rehab™ plan I'm hitting the campus board again (don't worry Mum - feet on and open handed) to get fit and get awesome. By Saturday I even managed to reduce the swelling in my ankle enough to get a rock shoe, so I hobbled into Malham for a session on Rainshadow.
There was a good scene at Malham on Saturday, by which I mean that the entire sodding world was on the catwalk, strutting around as if they had as much right to be there as I did. Rainshadow is going well, although progress is incremental. I'm getting more solid on the crux moves, and got some good beta from Ryan P, who is looking very tidy on it. Probably because he climbs the crux bulge in seven moves, where I take twelve. For me I still need to take it easy and not try big links, in case they break me.
On Sunday the wife and I went to the Barn, for their amusingly-named 'Barn Wars'. Because it was May the 4th. Ha ha. Jules wants to get in as much comp practice before the British championships as possible so local comps like this are an excellent chance to refine strategy and learn to work sequences etc. Obviously I would have won, had people who were better than me not turned up. Nathan Phillips won, who is injured - though clearly not as injured as I am. Dave Barrans didn't win. I hope this makes him angry enough to try hard at next weeks World Cup in Grindlewald... Jules won the ladies comp despite being tired from a load phase of her training, and won a very generous £200 prize which she spent on shoes. Typical girl.
Then, since it was a bank holiday we spent monday shopping in Sheffield and doing a bit of gardening, and then had a nice evening watching the World Cup on YouTube and making Ravioli. Which was nice. And that's about it. Stayed tuned for more blog posts, in which I sustain more injuries and not much gets climbed.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Very nice.
How did you make ravioli?
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Apply can opener to Heinz, turn at least 20 times and microwave in separate bowl. Right?
We are British you know ;)
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Naw, them Littlefairs are dead sophisticated like, they buy it in a bag. From Aldi n'all.
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Flour, eggs and a rolling pin. With bolognese in them. You pricks.
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:dance1:
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Next time you can try and put ricotta and boiled spinach, mashed togeter, inside the ravioli; and the ragù (sorry but my DNA does not allow me to call it Bolognese) as the dressing.
If some of the ricotta and spinach mash is left over, simply make balls with it, roll them in flour, add some oil and throw them in the oven. Then add tomato sauce, or ragù, or butter and sage, or parmesan, and thank me.
'kinell I'm hungry now.
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good bitterness coming out of this Stu, keep it up
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Nibs, you should do a series of 'Cooking with Lorenzo' videos!
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Nibs - thanks for the tips. They sound amazing. Sadly I can't bring myself to call anything ragu since in the UK it's the name of a horrible pre-made pasta sauce.
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good bitterness coming out of this Stu, keep it up
Cheers guy, but if you think that's bitter, wait till I get started on Barrows onsighting 8b
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In Praise of Alex Barrows (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/05/in-praise-of-alex-barrows.html)
9 May 2014, 8:51 am
I think we've known each other long enough to be honest. I'm Alex Barrows' biggest fan. Ok, he's a ridiculous looking, freak of a human being. And admittedly he has ruined climbing in Parisella's Cave forever. And, since you bring it up, the "Climbers Against Barrows" T-shirt was rather funny. And his little poodle is quite annoying, but there's more to Alex Barrows than this.
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/--3z20DTe8vA/U2yXBGXij7I/AAAAAAAAAck/ZvXA98S1Aog/s1600/climbersagainstbarrows+copy.png) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/--3z20DTe8vA/U2yXBGXij7I/AAAAAAAAAck/ZvXA98S1Aog/s1600/climbersagainstbarrows+copy.png)
I think it's time to acknowledge that Alex is a nice guy. He's cheerful and friendly and doesn't have a bad word to say about anyone. Reading for a PhD in Physics suggests he's at least moderately bright. Unlike me, when confronted with a different opinion he genuinely tries to understand why it might be right. He's helpful to other people at the crag and has a infectious, bounding enthusiasm more climbing. I genuinely struggle to think of someone I'd rather go climbing with than Mr Alex Barrows.
More than this however, it's time I admitted that he's actually quite good at climbing. Having now climbed 3 8c+'s his sport climbing track record is pretty much as good as it gets in the UK. Alright, two of them were boulder-problem traverses of dubious worth but we have to respect difficulty wherever we find it. Moreover, word on the street is that he has just onsighted not one, but two, 8b's in Rodellar. In typical modest fashion he didn't let anyone know about this (apart from posting on Facebook and updating his 8a.poo scorecard from the crag), so I'm telling you now. In short, Mr Alex Barrows is one hell of a climber.
In summary I'd like to take this opportunity to publicly apologise to Britain's hardest climbing Will Ferrel look-a-like and say - Alex Barrows, we salute you.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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what the fuck Stu, what the fuck
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Account hacked?
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Crikey! :o
How big is his head going to get after all that back slapping?
And I quote "Arms like lead balloons, kneepads like swimming pools and an ego like you wouldn't believe. Climbed like shit on the bottom part but thankfully got it together on the upper bit. Stamina cave climbing - just my bag. Fought like a mutha fucka and screamed like a little girl taking the victory jump! Made up."
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A poodle? A fucking poodle? Jesus fucking Christ.
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A poodle? A fucking poodle? Jesus fucking Christ.
I'm sure the attack poodle will be along soon...
;)
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what the fuck Stu, what the fuck
I couldn't live the lie any more.
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A poodle? A fucking poodle? Jesus fucking Christ.
This is an oblique reference to three-nine, Alex's constant companion and 'attack poodle'.
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what the fuck Stu, what the fuck
I couldn't live the lie any more.
we all like him, but we all made that pact in the damp S6 cellar for a reason, to save him from himself. You'll be the upfall of him, mark my words. Stickers on his trousers by the end of May.
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we all like him, but we all made that pact in the damp S6 cellar for a reason, to save him from himself. You'll be the upfall of him, mark my words. Stickers on his trousers by the end of May.
maybe i've bought Alex Barrows shares, and I'm just hyping the brand before releasing the Alex Barrows(TM) signature range of kneepads?
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A poodle? A fucking poodle? Jesus fucking Christ.
This is an oblique reference to three-nine, Alex's constant companion and 'attack poodle'.
Sorry, I hadn't gotten it. The idea of Alex's frame walking a poodle was just too much. Feeling (slightly) better now.
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we all like him, but we all made that pact in the damp S6 cellar for a reason, to save him from himself. You'll be the upfall of him, mark my words. Stickers on his trousers by the end of May.
maybe i've bought Alex Barrows shares, and I'm just hyping the brand before releasing the Alex Barrows(TM) signature range of kneepads?
sell out, I'm changing my display pic.
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The fact that you made a post about me just ruined marks day.
3 8c+s? Who the fuck do you think you're talking to punk. 4 including both the trav things.
I hope I don't lose your respect and adoration when I tell you that today I fell off an 8a+ when I kneebared on my hand and got stuck...
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The fact that you made a post about me just ruined marks day.
I was reading. I was confused. Now I understand...
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Genius. An attack on the attack poodle done via slightly unlikely praise (which nobody now knows is sincere or not). It's like Shakespeare round here these days.
I can't work out if I wish the internet had been usable/invented when I was involved in the scene or if it would have just meant I'd have got my head kicked in on a regular basis.
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I kneebared on my hand and got stuck...
Please tell me this is on video.
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I'm afraid not. It has happened before too.. Need to work on my hand extraction technique. That sounds wrong.
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we all like him, but we all made that pact in the damp S6 cellar for a reason, to save him from himself. You'll be the upfall of him, mark my words. Stickers on his trousers by the end of May.
maybe i've bought Alex Barrows shares, and I'm just hyping the brand before releasing the Alex Barrows(TM) signature range of kneepads?
I'd buy one. Couldn't be worse than the wretched 5.10 kneepit slashers. Do they come with complimentary gaffer tape and disposable razor?
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TBH I'd buy one too after trying on Stu's spare, much better than the FiveTen pads and if he (or his Mum more likely) can crack the straps (neoprene seems a too stretchy for this part IMO) then it'll be 'Da Bomb' Kneepads from Barrows.
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I can see a cottage(ing) industry growing here.
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Just goes to show there is a demand for some decent kneepads out there.
I am currently designing a Mk II version of the one I lent Paul, which will fix the straps along with some other tweaks to improve longevity. I've only got enough rubber to make about 4 though, and two of those will obviously be for me... If people are interested, and my mum is keen I suppose we could make a larger batch. However, my current design is pretty much a rip-off of the Send Downgrader strap and I'd feel uncomfortable making a Send clone in any quantity. Plus I'd have to source the rubber, which isn't easy...
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Just goes to show there is a demand for some decent kneepads out there.
Demand can't be that high given I left it in the middle of the Foundry floor and nobody knicked it :-[
Joking aside, what modifications do you intend to make beyond the stretchy straps? Did you glue the rubber to the neoprene as well as stitching it?
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The main changes would be to avoid sharp edges on the rubber and to score a groove in the rubber so the stitching doesn't rub on the rock. The rubber isn't glued on, just stitched.
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Nobody nicked it Paul since the only other guy who could get his leg into it is getting his mum to make them all !!!
Knee pads! I remember you refusing to drop knee at the school after working on whatever it was for months and months then having the audacity in one of the other threads to say you don't work things. Beautiful ;)
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Boat People (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/08/boat-people.html)
26 August 2014, 5:58 pm
My new best friend Alex Barrows mentioned during an otherwise interminable car journey that he liked my blog, and was sad I didn't write any more. So I'm going to make an effort to post something up here every now and again.
I don't usually like Bank Holidays. Maybe because the Spaghetti Monster in the Sky hates me, and arranges for me to be away on work trips, whiling away the tedium by flicking through Farcebook and seeing what a great time everyone else is having. Not this time however; this time I had the full three days free. Moreover it is looking as if my rotting connective tissue (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.co.uk/2014/05/they-shoot-horses-dont-they.html) may be starting to re-knit, allowing me to start doing some actual climbing, as opposed to belaying and offering helpful abuse to fellow crag-dwellers.
[tr][td](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-EzB6PDV973A/U_zHPmJfWTI/AAAAAAAAAe0/MedVfzH42-4/s1600/P1010192.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-EzB6PDV973A/U_zHPmJfWTI/AAAAAAAAAe0/MedVfzH42-4/s1600/P1010192.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]HMS Marjory[/td][/tr]
[/table]The Diamond is a crag I've wanted to go to for ever and ever and ever. We tried a few years back, but my nameless partner refused to descend the sliding staircase gully to the handline. This time, inspired by Gus and his continuing adventures in HMS Smash!, I bought myself a dinghy and the wife and I launched boldly crag-wards. And what salty mariners we are! Admittedly, there were a few wrinkles; such as when we cocked up the launch and filled the boat and our rucksacks with brine. And when Jules angrily insisted my rowing instructions made no sense, so that we spent a good few minutes rowing in opposite directions and spinning like a top. Once these minor wrinkles were ironed out, however, we proceeded to the base of the crag at warp-speed, arriving half an hour after high tide. As the photo shows above, half an hour after a high tide of around 7.5m is a perfect time to access the base of any route - although you may be lowering off into the sea!
On the way home, Jules and I passed our time by pleasantly arguing about whether the Diamond qualifies as Britain's #3 sport crag (after Malham and Kilnsey, natch). Suffice to say we had a very good time. Conditions were OK, with a small amount of spooge which burnt off over the day. I would have loved to be on top form and get involved with some of the big rigs (that's what the kids say these days, isn't it?). Unfortunately, neither fitness nor injury allowed it. I did have a play on the Brute, which is very very good, but still too tweaky. However, the finger did allow me to nip up The Sting and Boat People, appropriately. This was enough to reveal that all my hard won fitness has completely vanished. Lots of hard work ahead, methinks!
[tr][td](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-f0q01GOx0TQ/U_zKF2ww1VI/AAAAAAAAAfY/YMfwlVMRp_c/s1600/P1010195.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-f0q01GOx0TQ/U_zKF2ww1VI/AAAAAAAAAfY/YMfwlVMRp_c/s1600/P1010195.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Rhoslyn on Boat People. Seriously good thugging.[/td][/tr]
[/table]On Monday we went to Malham, which hasn't changed. A shout out to Ted for topping out Totally Free during what seemed at the time to be the coming of the apocalypse. And for working out how to get back down on a 70m rope. We're all chuffed he didn't die.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Nice one Stu. Barrows is right, great blog.
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What they said
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One of the few I look forward to reading. Generally fairly positive, well written and usually amusing.
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The two finest crags in the world (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/09/the-two-finest-crags-in-world.html)
1 September 2014, 10:10 pm
I really love getting to climb with Rupert. Our schedules don't mesh as often as they should. Ru has the excellent reason of having a young and adorable family to raise. I'm not sure what my excuse is. On Saturday Ru organised a full-day pass and we met up to head up climbing somewhere. Given that we didn't think about it too hard, and that we were chatting most of the way out to the peak, it seemed inevitable that my autopilot would kick in and we'd end up at Raven Tor.
After the usual pseudo-competitive warm up (a tie - honest), it became clear that neither of us were firing on all cylinders and so we ditched our plan A's and switched to plan B. Except we didn't have a plan B, so we shuffled back and forwards along the crag looking for a route that wasn't too hard, that we hadn't done, and which was short. There weren't many options. We ended up trying 'The Brazilian' - a non-existent ex-project which Steve Mac hoovered up, adding a proper finish to give 'Rooster Crossing', and 8c which goes to the top of the crag. The original project took in a hard boulder problem to reach the breathtakingly perfect line of Rooster Booster, and finishes along that. Way back in the day, Ru nearly ticked it in an afternoon, so we figured it would be easy pickings, now that we're older, stronger and wiser. Oh the arrogance of old age. We licked our wounds by doing some stamina training - nothing like getting a stopwatch out at the crag to make you feel like a hero.
On Sunday I once again fell foul of my ambitions, and made the questionable decision to visit Malham in the baking sunshine. We arrived after noon, to find an almost empty crag shimmering in the heat. Warming up in the centre of the crag, I felt like Laurence of Arabia, squinting longingly through the heat haze to the shade on the right hand side. Slowly but surely the shade crept round until, just seconds before it got dark, conditions finally became good enough to get off the floor. Jules put a sterling effort in on Thriller, but my own performance is best left undocumented to spare my blushes.
Next weekend I have one day to climb, and then will be forced to stay in a five star hotel in Scotland, eating fine food and talking nonsense for a living.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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The life you live! Furryboots* are you going to be?
*(local dialect / venacular for whereabouts, just to get you into it in case you are anywhere near here)
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I shall be in Pitlochry. I'm looking at the conference schedule now and wondering how many afternoons off I can take...
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Weem and Dunkeld.
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Dear Diary (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/09/dear-diary.html)
15 September 2014, 2:09 pm
Weight: 9st 10lbs (stubborn)
Cans of Coke: 6
Middle Finger Tendon Integrity (MFTI): 0.73
I'd spent the week holed up in a posh hotel in Pitlochry, discussing Electrification in Dusty Atmospheres. It did nothing for the waistline, and Pitlochry appears to be a Highlands Theme Park so horrid it has driven out all the local Scots. However, I did get to watch super-slo-mo videos of people re-creating volcanic explosions in the lab. Those guys are in the right job.
I returned Sheff-side exhausted, hung over and desperate to go climbing. Toby has a well-earned reputation for climbing without undue haste. It's ok though, because he rectifies this by starting early. So he picked me up from my house at half-past-early and we drove, bleary-eyed to Long Wall. I don't want to say bad things about Long Wall, so I'd best not say anything at all. It's long in one direction at least, I guess. Nevertheless I did manage to have an enjoyable day here. Toby dispatched Atlantic Realm, which is apparently 7c+ now half of it has fallen down. Toby did it with great ease, or at least very statically. It can be hard to tell which. Then I managed to comfortably flash the hard climbing and embarrass myself horribly on the easy top slab. Note to self: power screaming on 6b slab climbing is never acceptable.
On Sunday I returned to Malham to continue what is definitely going to be a long term affair with Rainshadow. I also cleaned out some bird's nests from Thriller/Victor Hugo so you really have no excuse now, do you? Once again I was struck by just how strong everyone is these days. Apart from myself there was one other 9a aspirant there that day, four people trying 8c's and teenage girls getting close to 8a's. It's a far cry from ten years ago, where you could climb an 8b and spend the rest of the day basking in the admiration of your peers. This makes me sad.
I'm sadder still by progress on Rainshadow. I firmly believe that I am capable of getting through the crux roof from the ground, but there is a long move on the headwall that I fear is just too hard. I can't do this move reliably off the rope, and you've already done at least 8c+'s worth of climbing by the time you get there. I remain hopeful, but not optimistic. The only thing that makes me feel better is how bad Alex Barrows is on this route. During his epic dogging sessions which seemed to last a day each, I estimate he spent 0.34 microseconds actually holding his own weight. I can only assume his belayer has very bruised hips this morning.
Still, no amount of failure on Alex's part will constitute success on mine, so I'd better do something about this headwall move soon. Stay tuned for more on that, and an upcoming blog post in which I alienate the entire female climbing community, shortly before the women's climbing symposium (http://www.womensclimbingsymposium.com/) kicks off.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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I did try and make you feel better by flailing around on 7b+
yours,
Bruised hips of Hebden Bridge
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... and teenage girls getting close to 8a's. It's a far cry from ten years ago, where you could climb an 8b and spend the rest of the day basking in the admiration of your peers. This makes me sad.
I likewise sincerely apologise that my efforts to fly the flag for weakness and failure were not enough! Whilst I cannot fall more often or more pathetically, would failure whilst wearing a silly hat better serve to ameliorate your sadness?
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I likewise sincerely apologise that my efforts to fly the flag for weakness and failure were not enough! Whilst I cannot fall more often or more pathetically, would failure whilst wearing a silly hat better serve to ameliorate your sadness?
Did someone abuse you with a thesaurus when you were little, or have you recently eaten one?
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Dear Diary (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/09/dear-diary.html)
Note to self: power screaming on 6b slab climbing is never acceptable.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
But always very funny. Slow, weak and sh*t i may be, able to stand on ledges on an off vertical wall without throwing the toys out of the pram, I can manage. Just. ;)
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Did someone abuse you with a thesaurus when you were little, or have you recently eaten one?
I deeply regret any discomfiture my sesquipedalian, nay logorrheic, ways may have caused you. Next time we meet, I will strive to express myself in a more laconic, monosyllabic if you prefer, manner. Ugg?!
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I do thank you all for your efforts on Sunday. Moose - maybe the hat would help, if it had jangly bells on.
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Anything for the birds'-nest excavator-in-chief. I'll make doubly sure by getting a hat with both jangly bells AND a propeller on top - no sense in taking any silly chances (though it might be a struggle to find one in the office Arco catalogue).
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Dear Diary (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/09/dear-diary.html)
15 September 2014, 2:09 pm
However, I did get to watch super-slo-mo videos of people re-creating volcanic explosions in the lab. Those guys are in the right job.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
Something like this? My dream job as a 13 year old. It's a shame I was too thick to stay with physics.
http://youtu.be/PaLNrA9vYgc (http://youtu.be/PaLNrA9vYgc)
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That's exactly the stuff Duncan. Such a cool thing to work on...
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Unsolicited thoughts on women in climbing - part I (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/09/unsolicited-thoughts-on-women-in.html)
17 September 2014, 5:27 pm
So, on September the 27th, the women's climbing symposium (http://www.womensclimbingsymposium.com/) will be held in Glasgow. Let me be frank. When I first heard about the women's climbing symposium I thought it was a really bad idea. Nowadays I'm not so sure. It's certainly true that women climbers face different issues to men, and this is an oft-used justification for women-only events. The issue I have with this is that too often this makes assumptions about whose fault it is that women face those issues. In a recent, and very inspiring blog post (http://eveningsends.com/climbing/day-sent-golden-gate/), Hazel Findlay puts it better than I can, discussing a time she let a male climber dissuade her from an onsight attempt:
"Although I was psyched to send my hardest route, I was annoyed that I had been discouraged from trying to flash it. Of course, it wasn’t Sean’s fault; it was my fault.
The reason this send was so important to me wasn’t because I don’t believe in rehearsing routes first. It isn’t even to do with what male climbers expect from the average girl at the crag. It has to do with self-belief. I know how well I can climb a lot better than a random guy I met two days ago. So why did I trust his judgment and not my own?"
Let's call this point of view the deficit model. In the deficit model, the issues women face when they climb is their own fault. Find all-male groups intimidating? Have a male partner who assumes you won't want to lead? Then man the fuck up and do something about it.
The phrase in italics highlights the problem with the deficit model. It views male behaviour as the norm, and forcefully suggests that women alter their behaviour to be more like men. Obviously, there are alternative points of view. One point of view is that if you do have a male partner who doesn't let you lead, then that guy is a dick, and he needs his world view adjusting. Preferably with a swift kick in the balls.
I believe that, for most situations, the issues women climbers face lie somewhere in between the two extremes. My issue with most discussions of women in climbing is not that the issues aren't genuine, or that the deficit model is entirely correct. It's that the deficit model is under discussed, and anyone suggesting that women share responsibility for solving their problems can be met with strong opposition.
Hey - here's an example. Women quite often shy away from power training, because they are afraid of getting arms like Sam Whittaker. Once again, the deficit model says the answer is to man the fuck up. Get over it. After all, it's not impossible to love a climber's physique. In a great blog post on the WCS, Michaela Tracy says:
"I remember hearing about a talk about body image amongst female climbers. This was something I just couldn’t understand at all. I love having big arms and broad shoulders, really I do. For me, having the build of a climber means that I can do what I love - and I get a lot more joy out of that than finding a dress that fits me."
But of course, it's not that easy. Because women face a lot of pressure from society about how they are supposed to look. It's hammered home from a young age. Their Barbie dolls are so ridiculous, if they were real they'd have to walk on all fours (http://www.rehabs.com/explore/dying-to-be-barbie/). The images they see in magazines are all airbrushed to present impossible ideals of femininity. It takes tremendous self confidence to ignore all this and be proud of your amazing body, and the training that got it that way.
When I first heard about the WCS, I assumed the deficit model would be totally undiscussed. To my mind that would make it actively dangerous - it would promote the idea that women faced special issues for which they shared no responsibility. For example, it would indulge women who found all-male groups to be intimidating, and suggest they climb in all-female groups instead. On the flip-side, a WCS that discussed the deficit model might suggest trying to overcome these fears, which would lead to a more positive, and less self-limiting result.
Of course, I've never been to the WCS, and so it is totally wrong of me to make this assumption. And no-one can deny that there are many many women who face issues that men will never encounter - and these women are whom the WCS is aimed at, and who give it overwhelmingly positive feedback every year. I'm sure that once again it will be a tremendous success, and I wish it all the best. Maybe those of them who I will force to read this blog might like to discuss the issues raised? Oh, and while I'm at it I have something else on my mind, which I'll harp on about in part II (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.co.uk/2014/09/unsolicited-thoughts-on-women-in_17.html)...
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Unsolicited thoughts on women in climbing - part II (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/09/unsolicited-thoughts-on-women-in_17.html)
17 September 2014, 5:55 pm
In the previous post (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.co.uk/2014/09/unsolicited-thoughts-on-women-in.html), I annoyed almost everyone for explaining why I thought the women's climbing symposium was a waste of time, and why I think I'm wrong about that. One of the examples I used in that blog post was body image in climbing. It goes without saying that I've been thinking a lot about women's bodies recently, and something struck my mind.
This image is the #1 google hit I get for "professional women surfers". It's from an article about why, to be a top women surfer, you've got to be sexy (http://www.goldcoastbulletin.com.au/sport/quiksilver-pro/sex-sells-for-female-pro-surfers-chasing-sponsorship-and-success/story-fnlkiai5-1226849871503). Go ahead, spend your lunch break finding pictures of the top 10 women surfers in the world. I promise you won't regret it. They are all hot. And these are the top surfers based on ranking, and not hot-or-not ranking either. What is going on here? And what the hell does it have to do with climbing?
[tr][td](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-56TpnM1OB-s/VBnFZkwIFaI/AAAAAAAAAgQ/ePi3HO2gAnE/s1600/871996-43022f2a-a752-11e3-ba3c-257e5cae2633.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-56TpnM1OB-s/VBnFZkwIFaI/AAAAAAAAAgQ/ePi3HO2gAnE/s1600/871996-43022f2a-a752-11e3-ba3c-257e5cae2633.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Sisters Ellie-Jean, 18, front, and Holly-Sue Coffey, 16, are both vying for the same spot in the Roxy Pro. Pic by Luke Marsden.[/td][/tr]
[/table]Admit it. At least half of you were betting the next paragraph would mention Sierra Blair-Coyle. Well it does, so give yourself a pat on the back and keep reading. This year I have been watching the IFSC climbing world cup avidly. It's great. The streaming is usually good and the competition has been incredibly impressive. But there are always some duller moments in any competition, and in one of this duller moments the wife and I were having one of those horrifically shallow conversations about who you fancy. It rapidly became apparent that whilst the male competitors were typically attractive (there were maybe two or three that Jules thought passable), that a very large number of the women climbers were blond and really very pretty.
So - I know what you're thinking. This result merely reflects the fact that I am a pervert and a lech. But no! It turns out that Jules also shares my opinion on the attractiveness of top women climbers, and so do the small sample of friends I have dared raise the topic with. "OK", you respond, "it is just that these are young, athletic women with fine bodies. Isn't it natural that they'll be attractive?". So I spent some time comparing my results with the attractiveness of women in other sports, for example athletics. I did this purely in the interests of scientific rigour, you understand. It turns out that, whilst women athletes are all young, and are obviously in peak physical form, they are just as pretty as the general population. Some are, some aren't.
So climbing, like surfing, seems to have found itself in a situation where most of the top women climbers are quite attractive. How did it get here? In surfing, you could argue that you have to follow the money. Sponsorship money flows easily to those who can sell product, and in the awful male dominated society we have, that means the pretty girls. This doesn't take away from the awesome talent of those at the top, it's just that you have to be an incredible athlete and pretty, which is not something the men have to put up with. Is this happening in climbing? I don't know. I get the impression that sponsorship money is pretty meagre, so maybe it's something more subtle? How would you feel entering your first competition, and all the girls around you were tall and pretty? What if you felt pretty self conscious about your appearance to start with? Would you feel at home? Would you climb your best? Maybe we're caught in a vicious circle, where potential top climbers don't feel at home unless they fit the profile? It's the same argument that's been made many times, in all walks of life to explain why we do not see diversity, even though we arguably have equality. It has been used to explain everything from the glass ceiling, to the lack of women on University Challenge (http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/sep/15/gutted-university-challenge-paxman-diversity):"Diversity is looking at outcomes. If there weren’t any women at the Ritz, you might ask whether you were making them feel welcome, as well as whether they had the price of admission."
I don't know the answers to any of these questions. I don't know if most will agree with the basic premise of this post. However I do know that I don't want climbing to go the same way as surfing, where a young girl with tremendous talent will choose another sport, because she feels shy competing in her underwear.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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I don't know the answers to any of these questions. I don't know if most will agree with the basic premise of this post. However I do know that I don't want climbing to go the same way as surfing, where a young girl with tremendous talent will choose another sport, because she feels shy competing in her underwear.
Right on
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Roundabout way to say you want to see more girls in their underwear, but you got there in the end.
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Personally, I'm yet to hear a good argument of what issues women face in climbing that don't apply to men. The one that applies only to women (in my mind) is the 'masuclisation' of their body i.e. becoming athletic and being embarrassed/judged about it. I've spent a lot of time climbing with Nat and having posed the question to her, we both agree that there isn't a single example we can identify of something or someone being different to her due to gender.
I expressed this after being asked to like the WCS page and had a significant debate with a few of the people involved which went precisely nowhere.
The main arguments in retort were:
1) well what's the harm? - none that I can see bar splitting an event purely on gender which seems somewhat contradictory but hey ho.
2) some women struggle to be involved with a 'masculine' sport - I couldn't understand or empathise with this at all.
It didn't get much past this.
Fair enough if there are certain aspects of climbing (physiologically speaking) which women differ from men and would benefit from a gender-based approach to this then crack on, but this isn't how it's presented.
If you think men don't get judged on body image (or that they aren't exposed to the same imagery) then you're on crack. I walked into town with two women from my office during the summer who spent the entire time telling me how 'ridiculous' the guy in front of us wearing a vest looked as he had large shoulders (muscular), I have other examples of this .
BTW why does Sean Mccol have a rope draped around his torso in those Mammut adverts?
I'm not sure I believe in what Stu has written above. Perhaps it could be seen to be going that way but I remain unconvinced (I'm more convinced it's a reaction to any heat he's been getting on the topic).
From my memory banks, the people who used to routinely beat me at comps and who have progressed to do many impressive things (from both sexes) are doing equally well. Maybe the women seem to be doing a tad better, but isn't that because they're a tad closer to the world-level they're engaging in (I'm thinking Shauna / Hazel here in this last statement)?
Right, where's the 'burned at the stake' smiley? Good job I'm fleeing to France shortly and won't have time to revisit this thread.
:tumble:
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Burn the witch.. err I mean wizard. No that sounds stupid. Witch. See even cliches are sexist.
Couple of thoughts. Where are the female voices on here? It's interesting hearing smart blokes' views on female climbers but I'd like to hear views from the horses's mouth - no no no, shit! - I mean I'd welcome it if more female climbers opined and generally talked shit on here as do us men.
My other thought - WCS, good thing?: tick. Marketing angle: possibly.
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It's an interesting question, why the low female climber participation in online discussions, of any sort. Female climbers online presence (with exceptions of course) seems to be confined largely to facebook and a bit of twitter and this is often in some sort of 'official' context, e.g. media items for sponsors. There are no doubt various reasons why this is the case, it would be interesting to know what reasons women gave.
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Personally, I'm yet to hear a good argument of what issues women face in climbing that don't apply to men. The one that applies only to women (in my mind) is the 'masuclisation' of their body i.e. becoming athletic and being embarrassed/judged about it.
I would put height in there. Problems at indoor walls are still set mostly by men and flat panels + blobs does mean you are at a disadvantage if you're 5'3. Outside, I remember Lucy Creamer saying years ago that she didn't really get on with grit as so often she was shut down by reach. Generally speaking, being tall in climbing helps. More women than men are short. It's an 'issue' for a lot of women.
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An "issue" i hear about quite a lot when my partner (in both senses of the word) Is 5ft 2 and I'm 6ft 2.
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Ramon is ex world champ and Napier sets the foundry.. No excuses there.
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I'm 6'2, my wife is 5'3 and to be fair, she's not really one to moan about it (she's pretty strong and has very strong fingers). But I climb with her enough and other women where it's obvious that the hold are just too far apart!
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Dawes, Bransby, McHaffie, McClure etc. all lead me to think height is less of an issue than skill. Or maybe power/weight.
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This is all really interesting (worth a thread split mods?) and I wish we had female contributors to this discussion...
I find the idea of 'masculinisation' interesting - but is there also a 'feminisation' of male climbers? E.G. Lithe frames and skinny legs are seen as good physical atrributes for climbers (sometimes enviously looked upon), leggings/lycra (OK that was back in the 80's) and a widespread obsession with weight and diet? (edit - sorry that last point shouldn't really be gender specific.. but it is funny how climbers are obsessed with diet!)
Maybe its just more of an androgyny thing?
Sorry if this is OT or daft - just some thoughts..
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Dawes, Bransby, McHaffie, McClure etc. all lead me to think height is less of an issue than skill. Or maybe power/weight.
I think its really only an issue with indoor wall setting... where the holds are where they are placed etc.. outdoors theres normally more than one way to do something etc...
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There's a big difference between being 5'8 and 5'3. Like, er, 5 inches. Apart from the Dawes and Ramon, not many men are 5'3. Whereas a lot of women climbers are around 5'3 with 5'8 actually being quite tall for a woman.
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Dawes, Bransby, McHaffie, McClure etc. all lead me to think height is less of an issue than skill. Or maybe power/weight.
I think its really only an issue with indoor wall setting... where the holds are where they are placed etc.. outdoors theres normally more than one way to do something etc...
Yeah, says a bloke! Let's hear from the women :shrug:
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Woman. I think we only have one on UKB.
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There's a big difference between being 5'8 and 5'3. Like, er, 5 inches.
I guess we midgets all look the same from up there Tom. I'm 5'8". I look down on the aforementioned, who are all 5'6" or less. So 3", not 5". Which is less of a difference than the everyman and the giant, or just me and you. You can argue it's somehow an exponential effect below 5'8", but I think you'd be clutching at straws.
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So you're citing 4 of the very best male climbers the UK has ever seen to argue that being short isn't an issue for a lot of short women climbers. Sorry, not convinced! There are always exceptions. Of course, I also buy into the other end of the argument that being tall is a distinct advantage most of the time. Or do you also disagree with that?
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Sorry - I'm having difficulty in hearing you from up here ;)
Point me at some sit starts and laugh at me fail... I'm happy to humiliate myself to make the undersized feel better ;)
Anyway - what about Ashmina?
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being tall is a distinct advantage most of the time. Or do you also disagree with that?
If this were true all the best climbers would be tall, and short people would never reach the elite. Like basketball. And yet I can name brilliant midgets more easily than tall ones. Top ten tall climbers: ?
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More sherioushly...
Being tall may mean you can tick some wall/crag problems more easily than you 'should' but really you're only cheating yourself - and often you can miss out on why a problem is so good by lanking through a good move...
5-11 with a +6 ape has to be the ultimate size IMHO.
I can think of several problems (not all sit starts) where lank has counted against me... That having to fold all those arms and legs into a small space feeling...
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Weight scales with volume but strength with cross section (roughly), so if you're tall you can expect to be weak - it will make some moves significantly easier, but when you can't use the height the moves will be marginally harder. Not that any of this matters, since it's all just making excuses.
IIRC someone did the stats a few years ago on the top 8a.nu rankings and found, fairly unsurprisingly, that the average height of the top 20 or whatever ranked climbers was very similar to the average height for European men.
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being tall is a distinct advantage most of the time. Or do you also disagree with that?
If this were true all the best climbers would be tall, and short people would never reach the elite. Like basketball. And yet I can name brilliant midgets more easily than tall ones. Top ten tall climbers: ?
No, that doesn't follow. T_B said "most of the time" - he's talking about average climbers. For most average climbers a tiny little bit of height is much more useful than a tiny little bit more skill. It's quite easy to imagine that non average climbers might have non average physiques.
Basketball is a bad analogy. It's the other players make it so size-ist, not the arena itself. And yet there are still shorties who excel at the top level.
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Is there really actually much to say about height?
Women are certainly on average smaller than men. It makes a lot of climbs harder, has virtually no effect on a few (eg a parallel crack) and is very occasionally an advantage. I don’t think any of that is a matter of debate, is it? It’s not correct to say that it doesn’t apply to men, just that it applies less on average. As far as outdoor climbing goes I don’t think it is particularly fertile ground for debate. It is a real effect but what’s to do about it? Short of chipping holds climbs are what they are, so no room there. It’s a fool’s game making grades specific to groups/individuals, so I doubt anyone of sound mind would give that more than the briefest consideration. All that’s left is acknowledging that the world isn't fair, dealing with the rock and your body as it is. Where's the debate?
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Weight scales with volume but strength with cross section (roughly), so if you're
IIRC someone did the stats a few years ago on the top 8a.nu rankings and found, fairly unsurprisingly, that the average height of the top 20 or whatever ranked climbers was very similar to the average height for European men.
I think it's a fair assumption that 8a.nu's largest demographic is european males, if that is the case then you would pretty much expect that result even if height had zero effect surely?
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Height schmeight. I was more interested by the idea of using the example of elite climbers to say something about everyone else.
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Is there really actually much to say about height?
Women are certainly on average smaller than men. It makes a lot of climbs harder, has virtually no effect on a few (eg a parallel crack) and is very occasionally an advantage. I don’t think any of that is a matter of debate, is it? It’s not correct to say that it doesn’t apply to men, just that it applies less on average. As far as outdoor climbing goes I don’t think it is particularly fertile ground for debate. It is a real effect but what’s to do about it? Short of chipping holds climbs are what they are, so no room there. It’s a fool’s game making grades specific to groups/individuals, so I doubt anyone of sound mind would give that more than the briefest consideration. All that’s left is acknowledging that the world isn't fair, dealing with the rock and your body as it is. Where's the debate?
But climbs are ostensibly graded for the average climber - and currently, that means one that's 5'10" ish.
Whilst it's true that "It’s a fool’s game making grades specific to groups/individuals" I guess it might have a non trivial effect on the motivation/participation of a group whose average height means a large proportion of climbs are harder for them than the grade suggests? Obviously if this can be overcome then the "average climber" would change, and so (should) grades to reflect this, but in the interim I suspect this might be considered a barrier?
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Is there really actually much to say about height?
Certainly not a symposium's worth.
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Weight scales with volume but strength with cross section (roughly), so if you're
IIRC someone did the stats a few years ago on the top 8a.nu rankings and found, fairly unsurprisingly, that the average height of the top 20 or whatever ranked climbers was very similar to the average height for European men.
I think it's a fair assumption that 8a.nu's largest demographic is european males, if that is the case then you would pretty much expect that result even if height had zero effect surely?
Since this is for the top 20 climbers you'd expect this result ONLY if height doesn't have any correlation to climbing abilitity. As opposed to say tennis where in the current top 10, 8 are 6 foot or taller and the shortest is 5'9". As far as I can see there is absolutely no evidence that being tall is in any way confers a significant advantage in climbing beyond a possible initial period when starting out on easy/non steep routes.
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Is there really actually much to say about height?
Certainly not a symposium's worth.
Damn right... we need a series of symposia! ;)
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Is there really actually much to say about height?
Women are certainly on average smaller than men. It makes a lot of climbs harder, has virtually no effect on a few (eg a parallel crack) and is very occasionally an advantage. I don’t think any of that is a matter of debate, is it? It’s not correct to say that it doesn’t apply to men, just that it applies less on average. As far as outdoor climbing goes I don’t think it is particularly fertile ground for debate. It is a real effect but what’s to do about it? Short of chipping holds climbs are what they are, so no room there. It’s a fool’s game making grades specific to groups/individuals, so I doubt anyone of sound mind would give that more than the briefest consideration. All that’s left is acknowledging that the world isn't fair, dealing with the rock and your body as it is. Where's the debate?
But climbs are ostensibly graded for the average climber - and currently, that means one that's 5'10" ish.
Whilst it's true that "It’s a fool’s game making grades specific to groups/individuals" I guess it might have a non trivial effect on the motivation/participation of a group whose average height means a large proportion of climbs are harder for them than the grade suggests? Obviously if this can be overcome then the "average climber" would change, and so (should) grades to reflect this, but in the interim I suspect this might be considered a barrier?
Until such time as all guides are digital it's a non starter trying to simultaneously re-grade the world. But what is more important, such a regrade in seeking to cater for the short (in practice this would mean upgrading a lot of reachy things) you would just succeed in making tall climbers CV's look more impressive.
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I'll give you the same question I gave my niece when watching some people climb, no overhangs were involved in any way. "Do you think he'll climb this" "yes he's taller than the other man" "does that matter?" "Of course it does he can reach the holds easier. I'm 11 I'm not an idiot"
The innocence of youth
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And bonjoys talking sense.
To be fair, and no offence stu, I thought stu's posts on the symposium were rambling and didn't seem to have a point. Unluckily for you I normally like your blogs so will keep reading
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No, that doesn't follow. T_B said "most of the time" - he's talking about average climbers. For most average climbers a tiny little bit of height is much more useful than a tiny little bit more skill.
Nonsense. If height was such an advantage, the best climbers would all be tall, whether we mean the best of all climbers or the best of you and your mates. But they aren't. In fact, our best male sport climber is a midget, our best male trad climber is a midget, our best female trad climber is a proper midget. That our best knee-bar cheat is tall only goes to prove the point further. I regularly get burnt off by the short, but I've rarely been burnt off by taller folk, even on dynos - because they are all heavy and malcoordinated.
Just because it is obvious when a move is easier if you are simply tall, doesn't mean all climbing is therefore easier for the tall. To me it suggests that the moves which are not easier for the tall are just less obvious.
Getting back to the more controversial point, I agree our top female climbers are currently unusually attractive. I think that's a coincidence. I don't agree British climbing has an organised or powerful enough sponsorship structure (yet) to favour the more attractive. Neither am I convinced that less obvious forces are holding back the less attractive.
It's interesting that men are more active on forums but women organise events for themselves. I suspect the up-and-coming young female climbers are far better informed about sponsorship and the reality of 'professional' climbing as a result though.
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As far as I can see there is absolutely no evidence that being tall is in any way confers a significant advantage in climbing beyond a possible initial period when starting out on easy/non steep routes.
And the respective backlash when the routes get harder, as shorter climbers have already developed some skills where the tall ones have been relying on lank.
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I think it's a fair assumption that 8a.nu's largest demographic is european males, if that is the case then you would pretty much expect that result even if height had zero effect surely?
That was exactly my point - height has, IMO, pretty much zero effect. In some cases (moves/routes/problems) it is clearly a huge advantage; whenever it's not an advantage it's a disadvantage (see my first post with respect to strength to weight). Overall, for most routes, it will even out (less so for boulders, but who cares about them anyway).
As JB says, if a body type were particularly advantageous I think it would be evident anecdotally and statistically - like that most top climbers are distinctly not fat. I have no idea quite what r-man is getting at that would mean that wouldn't be the case?
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Where the hell is all this the top female climbers are unusually attractive from? Forgive me for being no oil painting but what...? Now I think people are starting to tread into very murky waters indeed.
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Is there really actually much to say about height?
Women are certainly on average smaller than men. It makes a lot of climbs harder, has virtually no effect on a few (eg a parallel crack) and is very occasionally an advantage. I don’t think any of that is a matter of debate, is it? It’s not correct to say that it doesn’t apply to men, just that it applies less on average. As far as outdoor climbing goes I don’t think it is particularly fertile ground for debate. It is a real effect but what’s to do about it? Short of chipping holds climbs are what they are, so no room there. It’s a fool’s game making grades specific to groups/individuals, so I doubt anyone of sound mind would give that more than the briefest consideration. All that’s left is acknowledging that the world isn't fair, dealing with the rock and your body as it is. Where's the debate?
But climbs are ostensibly graded for the average climber - and currently, that means one that's 5'10" ish.
Whilst it's true that "It’s a fool’s game making grades specific to groups/individuals" I guess it might have a non trivial effect on the motivation/participation of a group whose average height means a large proportion of climbs are harder for them than the grade suggests? Obviously if this can be overcome then the "average climber" would change, and so (should) grades to reflect this, but in the interim I suspect this might be considered a barrier?
Until such time as all guides are digital it's a non starter trying to simultaneously re-grade the world. But what is more important, such a regrade in seeking to cater for the short (in practice this would mean upgrading a lot of reachy things) you would just succeed in making tall climbers CV's look more impressive.
I'm not really arguing for a mass regrade for the short, I think if necessary it'll just (very) gradually happen as the height of the average climber changes. My point was that if grades are largely tougher for a group (women) than for the rest of climbers, it might discourage some and thus be a barrier (obviously not because nobody cares about grades do they...)
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Where the hell is all this the top female climbers are unusually attractive from? Forgive me for being no oil painting but what...? Now I think people are starting to tread into very murky waters indeed.
Unusual as in 'than would be expected by chance', not as in 'extremely'. And no one said 'all'. In the interests of equality I should point out I have had this debate in the past about male climbers - would Sharma have been as successful if he'd looked like you?
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I am mildly disgusted by this thread. It seems that everybody, short arses and streaks-of-piss alike, can agree that being slightly taller than somebody is no distinct advantage.
Yet whenever I have ever burnt off somebody else, the same excuse gets trotted out.
"Ooo you properly lanked that", they quaver.
Never has anybody had the good grace to say "Gosh, you're climbing better than me today".
It's a fuggin' diz grace.
http://ukbouldering.com/board/index.php?topic=10347.0 (http://ukbouldering.com/board/index.php?topic=10347.0)
:rtfm:
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Weighing fuck all is more of an advantage than being tall (unless you're talking proper midget). McClure having the strongest fingers in the UK and weighing 8 stone is not a coincidence!
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Sharma possibly not, but the guy who apparently mostly resembles me has never been seen doing anything and has also become a legend
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Where the hell is all this the top female climbers are unusually attractive from? Forgive me for being no oil painting but what...? Now I think people are starting to tread into very murky waters indeed.
Unusual as in 'than would be expected by chance', not as in 'extremely'. And no one said 'all'. In the interests of equality I should point out I have had this debate in the past about male climbers - would Sharma have been as successful if he'd looked like you?
Surely Sharma got successful by being better than everyone else. His looks obviously haven't done him any harm from a sponsorship point of view but Ondra looks like Su Pollard / an ostrich / Screech off Saved By The Bell and it's not done him any harm, because he's better than everyone else.
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It's pointless making a special version of a guidebook for the short - when you just need to put the original guide on a lower shelf!
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but the guy who apparently mostly resembles me has never been seen doing anything and has also become a legend
Yul Brynner? :)
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Ondra looks like Su Pollard / an ostrich / Screech off Saved By The Bell and it's not done him any harm
Yeah, I agree. If a certain woman was similarly good I don't think it'd hold them back either. Which is why I'm not sure Stu has a point about hot women and surfing. And exhibit B - I'm gorgeous and yet no one ever sponsored me. :'(
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And exhibit B - I'm gorgeous and yet no one ever sponsored me. :'(
There's only so many front covers of Brad Pit and West Side Story that people can take ;)
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Which is why i said I'm not sure Stu had a point it was like reading something from fear and loathing. All we can get from this debate is everybody hates Barrows cos he's too tall, Steve Mc has the strongest fingers cos he's the lightest, and not a lot of women talk utter tripe on ukb like we do to pass the time when we can't go climbing.
Johnny you were, still are?, one of the Blox team are you not? Judging from the amount of vids, 8a etc, I've seen with everyones sponsorship claims i'd say you were on good money from it. Maybe time to ask Aidy for a rise ;)
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Ha. Blox!
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:lol:
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I am mildly disgusted by this thread. It seems that everybody, short arses and streaks-of-piss alike, can agree that being slightly taller than somebody is no distinct advantage.
Yet whenever I have ever burnt off somebody else, the same excuse gets trotted out.
"Ooo you properly lanked that", they quaver.
Never has anybody had the good grace to say "Gosh, you're climbing better than me today".
It's a fuggin' diz grace.
http://ukbouldering.com/board/index.php?topic=10347.0 (http://ukbouldering.com/board/index.php?topic=10347.0)
:rtfm:
What about that time you did pistol whip and I didn't, using the exact same beta... you lanky piece of piss :tease:
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I've looked into the WCS before but it's never taken my fancy. I don't feel like I'm the target audience. As a female climber, I can't say that I've ever felt like I was being held back by my gender. I'm not sure what issues women face in climbing that men don't - to me it seems like a particularly equal opportunities sport with a more level playing field between the genders than many other sports I've done. I mean, I've had the odd patronising remark or the unspoken '...for a girl' after a comment that I'm climbing well but they've been few and far between.
That said, I think women can find getting into climbing (or any sport) more difficult than their male counterparts initially as they will often have done less sport when they're growing up. We have a culture that largely encourages girls to be good and pretty, to avoid rough play and where it's acceptable to aspire to be a princess or a WAG when they grow up. When sport is encouraged it's usually as a way to get the bikini body you always dreamed of or to make the guy you fancy notice you. So it's no wonder that it feels tough to start out. Those aren't issues that are specific to climbing or in any way the fault of the climbing community, they're things that women need to work through themselves but if a women's climbing symposium helps then I have no problem with it.
The height thing is a funny one and I often change my mind on this (usually dependent on how well I'm climbing). As a particularly stumpy (5'2"ish) climber I find that indoor climbing is generally harder for the short but outdoors is much more of a mixed bag. Deviation from the norm means that grades are sometimes going to be wonky (and I'm sure this applies as much to the tall as the short) but obviously I only ever notice the moves which I find reachy and completely forget about the hideously bunched up ones.
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One other thought on the height thing. There's a lot you can do if you're short but also strong and flexible. If you're short AND weak it could be pretty demoralising!
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I am mildly disgusted by this thread. It seems that everybody, short arses and streaks-of-piss alike, can agree that being slightly taller than somebody is no distinct advantage.
Yet whenever I have ever burnt off somebody else, the same excuse gets trotted out.
"Ooo you properly lanked that", they quaver.
Never has anybody had the good grace to say "Gosh, you're climbing better than me today".
It's a fuggin' diz grace.
http://ukbouldering.com/board/index.php?topic=10347.0 (http://ukbouldering.com/board/index.php?topic=10347.0)
:rtfm:
What about that time you did pistol whip and I didn't, using the exact same beta... you lanky piece of piss :tease:
I can't help you being a woeful climber, Ben. Get some tekkers in your feet
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Incidentally that should have come with this:
:tease:
But I know you know that.
:kiss2:
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Those aren't issues that are specific to climbing or in any way the fault of the climbing community, they're things that women need to work through themselves but if a women's climbing symposium helps then I have no problem with it.
Crikey. I had a shocking day at work today, so only just managed to read these replies.
Thanks, Julie, for being about the only woman bothered to reply. The quote above says in about twenty words what I tried to say in my whole blog post.
I guess in more detail I'm only about 80% sure that women need to "work through themselves". Take body image, for example. I know a few women who have felt very self conscious follow remarks by men on their muscular appearance. It's not unreasonable to ask for a bit more tact from men in this regard. But in many respects I agree.
In response to Dense and JB:
Dense, I'm not at all offended you though these posts were nonsense. From you that's almost high praise.
JB - I'm surprised you don't think there are problems with women's surfing. I'd have thought it would be obvious to even a blind visitor from another planet, with limited access to the Internet.
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Sorry, I didn't mean to say that, I see it reads a bit like that. I meant to say I didn't think you had a point comparing surfing to climbing.
In the last few weeks I've learnt that S B-C is a better climber than I'd assumed, and if looks helped men Pasquill would be drinking champagne on his yacht right now...
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The surf girl issue has actually improved of late, since the Biarittz fiasco a few years ago when the promo video for a womens world cup event didnt actually show any surfing, and is a bit of a weird one due to the fact that they do actually dress like like to surf so pretty much every picture you get of them is like the one you used in your post. Also like the top female climbers you see many of the top female surfers are not skinny little things when you see them in the flesh, in fact i would suggest they are pretty solid looking and athletic so a good role model for other females. I would suggest that a lot of the skinnier looking girls are models more than surfers and are using the surf image to sell stuff rather than the fact the person is a great surfer, a bit like SBC in climbing. There are obvious exceptions like Alana blanchard, but most of the top 20 are not model like.
I do feel however that this is not just a women thing. Men are portrayed in the media in just the same fashion, every male used in adverts gives out the same notion of perfection that you get with the women, but i just think we get over it. I know i dont look like david gandy or beckham but i dont loose any sleep over it, maybe the girls need to just get over the whole thing, does anyone in climbing really criticise them for having muscles, if so just tell them to fuck off. Outside of climbing or sport they might get a few comments but i would put money on it the person making the comment wouldnt be happy stood naked in front of a mirror.
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Yeah. I'm sure in any sport if you want to get rich you need to be really good at the sport AND a nice/ interesting person AND great looking AND commercially astute. You can get by with one or two but all four is obviously the whole package. Often very best are that bit better because they haven't got room in their lives for anything else - and so they might not make as much money as the person at #3.
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I guess in more detail I'm only about 80% sure that women need to "work through themselves". Take body image, for example. I know a few women who have felt very self conscious follow remarks by men on their muscular appearance. It's not unreasonable to ask for a bit more tact from men in this regard. But in many respects I agree.
I take your point about body image. It's one of the reasons I'm glad they got rid of the DFBWGC thread - yes, you got a lot of pictures of strong women crushing and looking good but I remember seeing a few comments on there about certain women looking too beefy. It's disappointing to hear comments like that from climbers, people who you'd expect to understand the hard work and effort involved in getting strong and appreciate it.
For me, one of the great things about getting involved in sport was moving from thinking of my body as a collection of bits, more or less valuable based on their perceived attractiveness to the opposite sex, to considering my body as a wonderful amazing thing that lets me ride my bike for a hundred miles, walk up mountains and crank hard (well, hard for me!). With that mindset, hearing the odd comment about being beefy or looking scary just makes me think the person making it is a small minded dickhead, but without that confidence I'm sure it would bother me a lot more.
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I do feel however that this is not just a women thing. Men are portrayed in the media in just the same fashion, every male used in adverts gives out the same notion of perfection that you get with the women, but i just think we get over it.
I don't agree with this. Women are clearly far more heavily scrutinised on their appearance, including sportswomen. Just look at the Beth Tweddle Twitter Q&A debacle, John Inverdale's comments on Marion Bartoli and the amount of abuse that Rebecca Adlington has faced. Women in the public eye are expected to be young, groomed and attractive and older or ugly women to either botox/facelift themselves into submission or retire gracefully and stop making everyone else feel uncomfortable.
I'm not saying that this is the fault of men, in fact the worst culprits for making women feel shit about themselves are the women's magazines, but the focus on women's appearance in the media is overwhelming and it's fucking depressing.
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In my limited experience, negative comments about muscles have come from older non-climbing female family members.
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but I remember seeing a few comments on there about certain women looking too beefy. It's disappointing to hear comments like that from climbers, people who you'd expect to understand the hard work and effort involved in getting strong and appreciate it.
For me, one of the great things about getting involved in sport was moving from thinking of my body as a collection of bits, more or less valuable based on their perceived attractiveness to the opposite sex, to considering my body as a wonderful amazing thing that lets me ride my bike for a hundred miles, walk up mountains and crank hard (well, hard for me!). With that mindset, hearing the odd comment about being beefy or looking scary just makes me think the person making it is a small minded dickhead, but without that confidence I'm sure it would bother me a lot more.
I'd like to think that comments from climbers about how muscly a woman looks are not intended pejoratively, maybe just badly worded? I don't know a climber who isn't impressed by a big set of guns and shoulders whether they be on a man or a woman. I can't think of any female athlete (body builders aside) who's physiques are that far outside the norm of an 'average' healthy woman.
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I'd like to think that comments from climbers about how muscly a woman looks are not intended pejoratively, maybe just badly worded? I don't know a climber who isn't impressed by a big set of guns and shoulders whether they be on a man or a woman.
They might not be meant pejoratively but if you're already a bit self-conscious then it would be easy to take it the wrong way.
I can't think of any female athlete (body builders aside) who's physiques are that far outside the norm of an 'average' healthy woman.
Thus speaks someone who's never got stuck in a tight dress in Primark's changing rooms!
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I do feel however that this is not just a women thing. Men are portrayed in the media in just the same fashion, every male used in adverts gives out the same notion of perfection that you get with the women, but i just think we get over it.
I don't agree with this. Women are clearly far more heavily scrutinised on their appearance, including sportswomen.
I agree, does any sensible person really believe tha sportsmen are judged by appearance to the same extent as sportswomen? The fact that men are judged at times does not mean that this is not a more significant issue for women's sport
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Yeah. I'm sure in any sport if you want to get rich you need to be really good at the sport AND a nice/ interesting person AND great looking AND commercially astute.
I don't agree with this at all, I'm afraid. We're not talking about getting rich, we're talking about reaching the highest level athletically (many athletes reach the top of their game without being a commercial success). In many sports reaching an elite level has nothing to do with appearance. It obviously does in surfing. I think climbing may be going that way, but I'm happy for people to disagree.
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I'd like to think that comments from climbers about how muscly a woman looks are not intended pejoratively
I think they almost never are. They may indeed be intended as a complement. It's just a bit insensitive not to realise that most women won't take it that way...
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Yeah. I'm sure in any sport if you want to get rich you need to be really good at the sport AND a nice/ interesting person AND great looking AND commercially astute.
I don't agree with this at all, I'm afraid. We're not talking about getting rich, we're talking about reaching the highest level athletically (many athletes reach the top of their game without being a commercial success). In many sports reaching an elite level has nothing to do with appearance. It obviously does in surfing. I think climbing may be going that way, but I'm happy for people to disagree.
It isnt like that in surfing either. Take the commercial side of it away and those reaching the top of the sport get there because they are the best not what they look like.
However, to chuck a spanner in the works, the use of images of beautiful girls in bikinis makes it marketable to the masses and now means that there is more money to be had for the top athletes. What SBC has done might do the same for climbing.
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Sorry Gav, that's just nonsense.
Take a look at the top 18 athletes on the women's world championship tour (http://www.aspworldtour.com/athletes/tour/wct (http://www.aspworldtour.com/athletes/tour/wct)) and tell me with your hand on your heart that that's an average cross section of sporty women.
Nonsense.
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I'd like to think that comments from climbers about how muscly a woman looks are not intended pejoratively
I think they almost never are. They may indeed be intended as a complement. It's just a bit insensitive not to realise that most women won't take it that way...
I had this discussion with a female foundry regular after I said she was looking 'quite strong', meaning in the shoulders and as a definite compliment. It took some persuading that his was how it was intended and wasn't a bad thing.
Doesn't this just go back to your summary of Julie's post though?
I'd also say with the rise of cross-fit amongst other things, body image, and what people may try to attain (i.e. that of healthier role models) is changing.
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Stu - those head shots look like they're done pretty pro, so probably so make up peeps, hair peeps, best shot of many, bit of post-processing etc... You'd really need to spend the afternoon googling far more photos of them all to get a more representative idea ;) Even then, photos that you choose to put on the internet - as publicity for a pro athlete - are always going to be the ones you think make you look good.
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And yet I have never seen you manage it.
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tell me with your hand on your heart that that's an average cross section of sporty women.
No, but a cross-section of surfy women? Maybe. It's not caving. And as Alex points out, there's a lot you can do with long hair, a tan and a tiny headshot.
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And yet I have never seen you manage it.
There's only so much the camera can do..
I think one of those photos you took on LA makes me look good, I just need to do the damn thing now! And you never even offered to touch up my makeup.
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No, but a cross-section of surfy women? Maybe. It's not caving.
thank you, for making my point for me.
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Stu its not nonsense at all.
I have seen them at comps in the flesh and i can assure you a majority of them are athleticly built to a point where i would guess the normal womens mags would not put them into print.
All of the top ten other than Sally fitz and perhaps Laura enever would look pretty big next to a majority of girl climbers, built very much in the Jess Ennis mould that was championed by so many. All of them are there because they are the best athletes, yes you can make money from the sport by being a pretty surfer but non of them fall into that category.
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One of the surfers is called Coco Ho.
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One of the surfers is called Coco Ho.
She's the one who was filmed surfing in the nud.
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Stu its not nonsense at all.
I have seen them at comps in the flesh and i can assure you a majority of them are athleticly built to a point where i would guess the normal womens mags would not put them into print.
All of the top ten other than Sally fitz and perhaps Laura enever would look pretty big next to a majority of girl climbers, built very much in the Jess Ennis mould that was championed by so many. All of them are there because they are the best athletes, yes you can make money from the sport by being a pretty surfer but non of them fall into that category.
Gav - maybe we're at cross purposes here. I'm not bothered about their build. They're top athletes, of course they're going to have athletic builds. I'm talking about the fact that they're all pretty. If getting to the top of the women's rankings is all about talent, where are the ugly surfers? There are *plenty* of not terrible attractive female athletes, or tennis players, or gymnasts, or bike riders etc etc. Not so much for surfers.
Then look at surfing's image. Read the quotes in the article I linked. I can tell you with 100% confidence that if, hypothetically, my wife was an enormously talented surfer she would never have competed because of the sport's image.
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Bit harsh on the wife there Stu. With the same makeover etc she wouldn't look out of place. Photography innit.
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Exactly. They've all had the same makeover to try to create the same image. I would in no way agree that they are all pretty (which is subjective anyway) I'd agree that they've all been made to look as similar as possible in those particular photos.
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What a random set of dogs
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Bonjoy? Never mind, it's gone now. Didn't get that at all...
I've been corrected by Jules anyway. She says she would compete, but wouldn't seek sponsorship. I still count this as a win since she wouldn't be able to surf full time, so she'd be shit.
And JB, you fart-knobbler, I'm not suggesting Jules isn't pretty enough! Just that she wouldn't be comfortable in that scene.
High-standards dense. I'm surprised a man with your face can afford them.
I guess you just don't see what I see in surfing. Why not ask your female friends what they think?
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Hah! The sponsors would seek her out anyway, you really should give her a bit more credit.
As Gav keeps pointing out, they might not look so amazing in reality. Stick them in PVC overalls, smear some mud on their faces and they might pass for a caver.
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Bonjoy? Never mind, it's gone now. Didn't get that at all...
It was Greg Mitchell the sandy coloured labrador off one of the old Vic Reeves things. He had a certain catchphrase. Watch one on youtube you'll get what I was saying. Deleted it as I thought it might be misunderstood.
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Greg Mitchell (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1yMrYke5v0#)
;D
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Thanks Bonjoy. :guilty:
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Stu I've inferred from that that you think I'm ugly? How could you I'm shattered. I can't believe five ten dropped Ryan in their cull, he's so much fitter than the others.
Obviously nonsense aside I really don't see your point at all tho stu. Are you saying to me that all the sponsored women in climbing are more attractive than their peers / underlings? If so what utter rot. On top of which you're doing them a disservice by asking people to judge them on looks, which is exactly what you seem to be doing.
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Stu I've inferred from that that you think I'm ugly? How could you I'm shattered. I can't believe five ten dropped Ryan in their cull, he's so much fitter than the others.
Obviously nonsense aside I really don't see your point at all tho stu. Are you saying to me that all the sponsored women in climbing are more attractive than their peers / underlings? If so what utter rot. On top of which you're doing them a disservice by asking people to judge them on looks, which is exactly what you seem to be doing.
Not quite - I'm suggesting that the best female climbers are more attractive *on average* than their peers. This doesn't mean that they're all stunners, and I'm not explicitly linking it to sponsorship. I thought long and hard about posting, and checked my opinions out with other people, who agreed. I expected people to disagree, but I'm pretty stunned that some people don't see this effect even in surfing, where to me it seems blatant.
I don't think I'm doing anyone a disservice BTW, and I certainly don't intend this. I'm not implying that the best female climbers got there because of their looks. They got there on merit. What I'm saying is that there may be women who aren't making it, despite their talent.
Five minutes googling revealed a couple of 'pro surfer quits because of sexism' articles. It seems like this is, or has been, a problem in surfing. Maybe it isn't in climbing. It's obviously a contentious and arguable point.
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What I'm saying is that there may be women who aren't making it, despite their talent.
Define making it.
I can name you any number of male climbers who haven't 'made it' in any financial/ sponsorship sense despite being brilliant, and some gorgeous to boot. You have to be commercially minded and you have to be prepared to promote yourself, which most climbers aren't.
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What I'm saying is that there may be women who aren't making it, despite their talent.
Define making it.
I can name you any number of male climbers who haven't 'made it' in any financial/ sponsorship sense despite being brilliant, and some gorgeous to boot. You have to be commercially minded and you have to be prepared to promote yourself, which most climbers aren't.
I'm not talking about sponsorship. I'm talking about getting to the top of your sport. Didn't I already say this in a reply to you earlier? I thought I did anyway.
IF you agree with the observation that top women surfers and/or climbers are more attractive than the average*, there are only two possibilities
1) being good at climbing and/or surfing somehow makes you prettier
1a) prettier women are naturally better at climbing and/or surfing
2) some effect is making it harder for less pretty women to reach the peak of their sport.
I don't buy (1), and I don't think much of 1a either, since it doesn't seem to apply to other sports.
*and I do accept that some will disagree. For climbing at least.
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C'mon Stu, point 1 is clear cut - I thought women (and men) get an extra 2 marks on the out-of-10 system for partaking in the same activity of the observer.
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"I'm not talking about sponsorship I'm talking about getting to the top of their sport" you're making no sense at all Stu. Are you saying the best women climbers, ie the women that are best at climbing, are prettier *on average* than normal women climbers?
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there are only two possibilities
Or, as I said at the start:
3) It's a coincidence.
Unless you (of all people) are suggesting that correlation must imply causation?
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Surfers seem a bad example. Tanned, mainly blonde haired and athletic, spending their time in bikinis is a fairly mainstream definition of pretty/fit (http://dqndusk8a84ol.cloudfront.net/image/b90a0f5e964bf4a96932f744616c6530.jpg?&x=980&y=582&icq=75&sig=68fb70398f6d59440491286e036043db). It might be worth arguing that if you had a poor body image/was aware you weren't hit with the pretty stick that you may not start or spend enough time practicing a sport where you spend most of the day in a bikini surrounded by good looking people. - not saying this is how it should be, but it sounds logical.
On a similar note women's beach volley ball seems to have a higher than average attractiveness - despite it being an Olympic sport where looks should make no difference.
Wouldn't have thought that climbing was subject to the same selecting issues as either of those sports.
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C'mon Stu, point 1 is clear cut - I thought women (and men) get an extra 2 marks on the out-of-10 system for partaking in the same activity of the observer.
I don't surf.
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"I'm not talking about sponsorship I'm talking about getting to the top of their sport" you're making no sense at all Stu. Are you saying the best women climbers, ie the women that are best at climbing, are prettier *on average* than normal women climbers?
Oh my holy fucking christ. YES. THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING. THAT'S WHY I WROTE EXACTLY THAT.
Are you doing this on purpose, just to fuck with me?
OK. Deep breath. Sorry about that dense. Just got off the phone having made an idiot of myself and your were first in line for the vent.
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I didn't know Katie Holmes was a pro-surfer. It does seem that Stu is massively attracted to surf girls though.
I dunno about the same factors not applying to climbing, given the predominance of the indoors scene nowadays. They might not be in bikinis but it's a fairly crowded sweaty environment, and a more hanging around socialising than in other sports. Still not sure over-representation in the media equals over-representation in reality though.
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there are only two possibilities
Or, as I said at the start:
3) It's a coincidence.
Unless you (of all people) are suggesting that correlation must imply causation?
It may well be. That's fair. Time will tell I guess, since coincidences aren't sustained.
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It might be worth arguing that if you had a poor body image/was aware you weren't hit with the pretty stick that you may not start or spend enough time practicing a sport where you spend most of the day in a bikini surrounded by good looking people.
That's exactly what I thought I was saying. Although given how hard it is for dense to understand, I might have started speaking in latin without noticing.
I couldn't prove to you that climbing isn't going the same way, but I have my suspicions. These are based largely on my observations of the current female elite climbing population, not on any evidence I have that some women find climbing or comps unpleasant environments.
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BTW - I'm off home now. Talk amongst yourselves for a while
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Time will tell I guess, since coincidences aren't sustained.
You can look backwards in time too. Which is what suggests to me that this is a coincidence.
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You can, but you're assuming the pressures and culture was the same in the past as it has been the last few years. I think that's demonstrably false.
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You can, but you're assuming the pressures and culture was the same in the past as it has been the last few years. I think that's demonstrably false.
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Are the women at the top of climbing really all super attractive as you describe them. I personally dont think so and also they all seam to have different body types, within reason.
Again, just like surfing some are attractive, some not.
Sorry but I really dont get what you are trying to say.
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I am saying that on average, they are more attractive than you'd expect if you took a sample of young athletic women.
I really can't say it any clearer than that, and I've explicitly said above that obviously this doesn't mean they're all supermodels. Why is this so hard to understand?
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Since everyone is getting massively confused about this (and without offering an opinion either way) here is what Stu is trying to say:
Thesis: Physical attractiveness seems to be a feature that pre-selects which female athletes apply themselves to certain sports and become leaders. This seems to be the case with surfing (based on looking at some pictures of the highly ranked athletes) and also seems to be the case with climbing (also based on looking at some pictures of the highly ranked athletes), but does not seem to be the case with sports such as athletics (again based on looking at some pictures of the highly ranked athletes).
Stu is not sure why this is the case, but notes that perhaps its to do with some overt or not so overt pressure to look good whilst being on display in those sports. He thinks that, if this is the case, it is an unfortunate state of affairs for the sport of climbing to find its self in and he would wish that talent, and not physical attractiveness was the primary driver for female success.
Carry on arguing.
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And, once again. It's not entirely about body types. It's more about prettiness.
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God bless you rupert. Can I employ you as a translator. What are your rates?
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Interesting stuff. Stu, I like reading your blog - keep it up.
I have nothing of note to add to the discussion, other than to say that (I'm sure I'm half-quoting, can't remember who) climbing broadly suits all body types apart from fat (i.e. heavy) and weak. For this reason, most of the better taller climbers are streaks of piss, whilst amongst the better shorties there's a bit more diversity.
Well done to Jan Hojer for demonstrating that it's possible to combine lank with proper power, to some degree.
As far as the women stuff goes, with reference to their absence on these forums, this is perhaps worth a listen:
http://freakonomics.com/2013/02/24/women-are-not-men-a-new-freakonomics-radio-podcast/ (http://freakonomics.com/2013/02/24/women-are-not-men-a-new-freakonomics-radio-podcast/)
Women fall way behind men when it comes editing Wikipedia articles, and in essence this is because women are less inclined to be self-assured literal and metaphorical wankers. Online and in the real world. Its all about appetite for conflict, or lack thereof.
Not saying UKB is an overly tumultuous place, mind, just throwing it out there as an interesting observation.
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I just spent a whole boring talk's worth of time pondering the attractiveness of top climbers. I'm currently not convinced that average attractiveness is higher, once favourable body shape is accounted for..
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Josune
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Great post Danny. For what it's worth I think appetite for a conflict is a large part of why more women don't post in general, and haven't posted here specifically.
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Alex - you may be right. What convinced me I was onto something initially is that I once spent an evening discussing this with a mixed sex group of folk on a spanish trip. We all agreed that most of the women comp climbers were pretty, and we all agreed that the same thing was not true for the men.
This is a rough control for body type, although it's far from perfect.
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Since half the top girls go out with the top guys, clearly those being compared don't always agree with your survey!
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.02$
Perhaps its more to do with mentality while developing as youth. more "attractive" children receive greater praise than less "attractive" children leading to higher levels of self confidence-on average. They also tend to receive more 1-on-1 attention and do better in school. This has long been one of the possible explanations for why successful people in general are also more attractive than the general population. Knowing the importance of self belief and confidence in improving as a climber, or athletes in general, this could help to explain the change in averages...
No idea in reality though.
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This has long been one of the possible explanations for why successful people in general are also more attractive than the general population.
Interesting theory but how does this fit with most successful politicians?
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This has long been one of the possible explanations for why successful people in general are also more attractive than the general population.
Interesting theory but how does this fit with most successful politicians?
C'mon Sas, I know it's Friday night but that's so lazy.
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This has long been one of the possible explanations for why successful people in general are also more attractive than the general population.
I was going to say this but Sasquatch beat me to it - there's plenty of theories and studies around with the premise that good-looking people are more successful in life overall.
If the above theory is true, you could then bolt on a specific 'what defines success in climbing' theory to the 'good-looking people are more successful in life, overall' theory. Mine would be along the lines of:
'good-looking people have been shown to be more successful on average, and the parameters for 'success' in climbing are more nebulous than in a sport with stricter parameters of success - such as athletics (where you either are or aren't the fastest runner), therefore good-looking people should be expected to be more 'successful' in climbing.'
If you were to take out climbing's poorly-defined parameters of success: soft-grades and unverified grades, in the UK trad v sport, self-reportage so that media report what they're told and miss out a lot of other stuff, grey areas around 'style', unverified ascents, etc. etc.... then you turn it into something where being good-looking 'should' be less important than pure performance.
(edit) - Tennis is an interesting example where looks and a degree of ability can only take somebody so far - Anna Kournikova being the obvious example of a hottie getting loads of media attention but in the end it didn't matter - we all know she achieved very little of real significance performance-wise. I'd say surfing has a similarly nebulous definition of what constitutes a successful performance as climbing (but needn't if we adopted the Jens approach), thus the 'Kournikova's' of surfing can thrive... perhaps...
Of course, if the 'looks' theory is bollocks than so is the above.
Apols if that's a bit of a tangent.
Oh... and I once told an ex who climbed and who had lovely muscly shoulders that she was 'chunky' - I meant it affectionately - and she took it really badly, she was well upset! So from my sample size of one I think there exists a higher sensitivity to body image in women than exists in men.
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I always get in trouble by saying i like bigger women....
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On the attractiveness concept, it's a difficult chicken and egg argument.
This has long been one of the possible explanations for why successful people in general are also more attractive than the general population.
Interesting theory but how does this fit with most successful politicians?
C'mon Sas, I know it's Friday night but that's so lazy.
Never said I agree with it, and lord knows it's a chicken and egg argument? i.e. which comes first? Attractiveness or success?
I just thought it worth tossing in the ring, as it could fit the profile here, and is an opposite thesis for why the correlation seems to be there between attractiveness and success.
Thesis: Physical attractiveness seems to be a feature that pre-selects which female athletes apply themselves to certain sports and become leaders. This seems to be the case with surfing (based on looking at some pictures of the highly ranked athletes) and also seems to be the case with climbing (also based on looking at some pictures of the highly ranked athletes), but does not seem to be the case with sports such as athletics (again based on looking at some pictures of the highly ranked athletes).
I mean if you really want to take and run with it, it would explain why there are so many top english female climbers, but there are no top male english climbers cuz you "guys" all ugly gits :tease:
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Im in no doubt that a combination of empathy, charm, a nice smile and above average (but not too pretty - a threat ?!?) looks works wonders in the workplace and life in general for both sexes.
It's evolutionary biology innit?
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Oh... and I once told an ex who climbed and who had lovely muscly shoulders that she was 'chunky' - I meant it affectionately - and she took it really badly, she was well upset! So from my sample size of one I think there exists a higher sensitivity to body image in women than exists in men.
Rather interesting/amusing thread...
Petejh...dictionary definition of 'chunky': short and broad, or thick and heavy... not the word a lot of people would choose if they were trying to flatter someone! ...if you thought that she had 'lovely muscly shoulders', then say that. Simple. From your perspective it may seem that there is a higher sensitivity but from mine it just looks like poor communication skills on your part! (it did make me laugh when I read it which has prompted a rare comment from me!)
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I did say that after it was made clear that the 'chunky' description wasn't appreciated... And it does sound worse when you've got quick access to goggling the definition of 'chunky' - lucky for me she didn't have iGlass! That's going to bring a whole new level of anxiety around choosing words carefully.. perhaps for the betterment of human relations.
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I mean if you really want to take and run with it, it would explain why there are so many top english female climbers, ...
There aren't are there? There are only two 'top' british female climbers where 'top' means global rather than national context: Hazel Findlay and Shauna. Shauna's one of only 3(?) in the world to have reached that performance level. Hazel F. sort of highlights my point above about how poorly-defined what constitutes a high-end performance is in climbing: Hazel's climbed one - allegedly soft - 8c. I wouldn't have thought this qualifies as a 'top' performance in the context of women's climbing standards internationally, where multiple women have climbed 9a and one possibly 9a+, but she is a leading trad wad (best female big wall trad climber in the world?). If that sounds harsh it isn't meant to, I'm not judging, but arguing how difficult it is in climbing to define 'successful', away from sport-routes with well-established grades.
edit - of course any attempt to define success inevitably leads to pigeon-holing.
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i'd argue Mina's there as well.
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I know I shouldn't talk to people on the 'net on Friday nights...
But
What do you mean by successful, attractive, people?
Too many subjective terms.
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(http://eveningsends.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/ondra2.jpg)
Enough said
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In my mind:
Successful - someone who achieves what they aspire to.
Attractive - someone who appeals to a broad range of interested parties.
Although I've read surveys of women which seem to indicate that they find success attractive, so maybe the two are to intertwined to be considered separate variables.
If that sounds harsh it isn't meant to, I'm not judging, but arguing how difficult it is in climbing to define 'successful', away from sport-routes with well-established grades.
edit - of course any attempt to define success inevitably leads to pigeon-holing.
I'd definitely agree with this.
Honestly, I've not really thought this through though, so whatever I'm spewing is likely complete BS with a side helping of insanity.
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If that sounds harsh it isn't meant to, I'm not judgin.
Did the 'chunky' incident teach you nothing? ;D
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Not sure if this is entirely relevant (a thread that's focussed on height, weight, unattractiveness, and shittness at climbing, funnily enough I've kept away) but it strikes me as oddly apposite, almost inspiring
http://grantland.com/the-triangle/katie-ledecky-athlete-best-swimmer (http://grantland.com/the-triangle/katie-ledecky-athlete-best-swimmer)
An account of a young sports woman's career so far, no mention of her appearance, or comparisons with men. Set in a sport I'm uninterested in, yet I ended up avidly watching YouTube clips and determined to remember her name until Rio 2016.
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An account of a young sports woman's career so far, no mention of her appearance, or comparisons with men.
cough
Her time in the Pan Pac final would have been good for a top-20 finish at the U.S. National Championships … on the men’s side.
why am I being pedantic?
because I'm an arse, that's why
why am I being an arse?
because I'm a full-on fanny-magnet and no fucker ever offered me a decent sponsorship deal
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(but not too pretty - a threat ?!?)
Haters gonna hate Lagers.
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I guess what we really need is a thread with lots of pics of women climbing - I'm sure that would help Pete with his definition of chunky for a start.
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Thing is (love that phrase) - would a guy get upset if their girlfriend said they looked 'chunky', or 'skinny', or podgy, or stumpy, or that their legs were like two drawcord strings dangling from their waist?
I believe the majority of guys would laugh it off.
I realise calling a girlfriend 'chunky' was a bit dumb of me but I still think females are more touchy - unnecessarily so - than males over their appearance. The reasons why this is so (if it is so) are worth thinking about.
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I'm with you Pete. Asked a girl on a first date once how she'd broken her nose, she replied she hadn't. I said she must have as it was rather roman looking and she said, no, not ever. My finishing comment was she must have broken it on the way out of her mother.
Saw her for the next two and a half years. Mention cellulite however...
I was pondering on this over breakfast, thinking back to all the people who've I've took down the wall for their first climbing experience. Loads of male mates obviously and their looks varied dramatically as did body shapes but as far as women go, it's a different story. My daughter came once. The rest have all been young, pretty and fairly fit in the scheme of things despite me being old and fat - maybe this plays a big part in the high standard of climbing women? It may just say I'm shallow but I don't think that's it, so much as the women who ask to come and try climbing are the ones I've taken to the wall. I don't tend to hang around with biffers in general anyway I guess.
Interesting.
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Has anyone else read the article entitled "uncovered" in Summit magazine (the one with Sir Bonners on the cover)?
I only ask as I was quite enjoying reading the magazine (the alpine article made me chuckle a lot) when the aforementioned article took a leap from Stone Nudes etc. to "Rendering women objects of art and of the male gaze in this way does, and I'm sorry about this too, contribute further down the line to ongoing sexism and violence committed against women".
Had I been drinking coffee I would've spat it out.
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Progress? (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2014/10/progress.html)
23 October 2014, 7:26 pm
There's a tendency for, ahem, older sport climbers to reach a point where they feel they've got one last hurrah left in them. At this point, the Last Big Siege begins. If they're lucky, the last big siege only lasts a couple of years but for a few it becomes a true epic. Those hardy few who make it successfully to the other side of the Last Big Siege become part of folklore and legends. Those for whom the Last Big Siege is a breaking point face a different fate. They become folk stories of a different kind. Bogeymen with which to frighten young redpointers. "Finish your project, young lad, or you'll end up like...". No names - you know who you are.
I often wondered how you ended up getting sucked into the Last Big Siege, but now I realise how frighteningly easy it really is. In the last few weeks I've become increasingly worried that I was on my way to becoming the next Malham bogeyman. A fixed point to write route descriptions around: "Ten feet to the left of the short old man falling off the crux of Rainshadow, is a classic short route...". However, in the last few weeks I've found a few, tiny, reasons to be optimistic.
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VSr55bRxJTI/VElVBdxj_YI/AAAAAAAAAhg/hjlz3kins-M/s1600/FullSizeRender.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VSr55bRxJTI/VElVBdxj_YI/AAAAAAAAAhg/hjlz3kins-M/s1600/FullSizeRender.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Gurning through the crux. Credit: Adam Jeeworth.[/td][/tr]
[/table]I set myself a goal for this year of linking from the rest on Raindogs to the top of the route. I figured if I could do that whilst injured and unable to train I could probably do the route after a winter's training. Last weekend I made some serious progress towards that goal, linking from a few moves into the roof to the top. I can't over-emphasise how far this is off doing the whole route; the link I've managed is probably 8b+ or so. However, it's the biggest link I've managed by far, and the first time I've linked any number of moves into my bogey move on the headwall. The full link from the back of the roof might be on this year after all. However, even that link is probably only hard 8c, and it's a big step up from there to the full route. Maybe I am kidding myself after all. All I ask is that if I'm still on the route in three years, someone takes me aside and has a gentle word.
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-wkcgQHajwgI/VElWRnYQJEI/AAAAAAAAAhs/wi-Gz2CFol0/s1600/FullSizeRender+2.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-wkcgQHajwgI/VElWRnYQJEI/AAAAAAAAAhs/wi-Gz2CFol0/s1600/FullSizeRender+2.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]The hardest part of the crux roof. Credit: Adam Jeeworth[/td][/tr]
[/table]
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Both Keith and Simon Reeve were at the Tor on Monday, an omen of some kind?
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How do you plan to change your right boot mid-route?
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I've asked barrows to find me a kneebar so I can swap. He says he'll chip one if he can't.
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Friends don't let friends kneebar-deprived.
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In which I get comprehensively pumped and scared (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2015/01/in-which-i-get-comprehensively-pumped.html)
3 January 2015, 6:22 pm
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-9Wldp09Z5-w/VKguEhd7glI/AAAAAAAAAjY/uZRM2qSwRaA/s1600/IMG_1412.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-9Wldp09Z5-w/VKguEhd7glI/AAAAAAAAAjY/uZRM2qSwRaA/s1600/IMG_1412.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Chulilla - New Year’s Eve[/td][/tr]
[/table]
Let’s clear one thing up once and for all. I am not world renowned for my delicate footwork, flexibility, stamina or cool head. It is therefore with a certain sense of dread that I booked a two week holiday in Chulilla - a venue that seems to consist almost entirely of 30+ m routes on vertical tufa, crimps and flowstone. I am pleased to announce that my fears were entirely justified! It’s almost as if someone purposefully designed Chulilla to frustrate and confound me. It’s flipping brilliant.
Every route is a similar experience for me. I begin with cat-like precision and focus, stepping from flowstone smear to small edge on the tippiest tip of my toes and breathing smoothly. At bolt one we can detect a certain tension in the legs and a smidgin of irregular breathing. By bolt two the wheels are visibly coming off. By bolt five my legs are vibrating visibly. Bolt ten sees me as a gibbering, violently shaking lunatic; feet spasming in the direction of footholds, forearms like balloons. By bolt eleven I’m silently muttering “Oh god, oh god” under my breath. At bolt twelve, if things are going really poorly I might let out a high pitched whimper. By bolt thirteen I am pretty much always hanging on the rope, unless by some chance the climbing eases before then.
I can see why this place has become so popular. The routes are extremely good. Sure, there’s some dodgy rock, but there’s so much of the stuff here there are plenty of absolute pearlers. The routes are loooong, which works well with the angle, as shorter vertical routes can often be insecure nightmares. Here the routes are technical, but not desperately thin. They are surprisingly continuous - rests either have poor hands, or poor feet. Basically, it’s sport climbing for trad climbers.
Which explains why I am rubbish. The game plan was to start on some 7c’s and 7c+’s, and get my eye in before moving onto harder fare. Sadly, my eyes have been so far out on stalks on these easier routes there’s little hope of moving onto anything harder in the near future. But I don’t think I’ve ever had as much fun getting shut down on a daily basis. Basically, Chulilla is brilliant.
Which explains why the whole world is here. I must remember not to grumble about this, as I am as much a part of the problem as every other climber here. However, I would strongly recommend coming slightly out of season. At the crag yesterday every single route had a queue on it, with the exception of a desperate 7c that only Ted Kingsnorth could love. It does make climbing a very sociable experience...
As a result it was nice to get out of Chulilla today and explore the countryside a bit, and feel like we were in Spain again. We visited a quality roman aqueduct (http://www.romanaqueducts.info/aquasite/chelva/index.html) just outside Chelva, with impressive tunnels cut through the limestone, and ate Serrano Ham sandwiches by the river. Tomorrow, we return to do battle with more sketchy 7c+’s. At least the bolts are close together...
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-J2k6qE565bk/VKgyzNJjseI/AAAAAAAAAjk/PpYoR-NURbE/s1600/IMG_1422.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-J2k6qE565bk/VKgyzNJjseI/AAAAAAAAAjk/PpYoR-NURbE/s1600/IMG_1422.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Jules in the tunnels, proving the Sun really does shine out of her arse.[/td][/tr]
[/table]
[tr][td](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-j1wzdOuq754/VKgy9ecSZrI/AAAAAAAAAjs/-A9aGqlxFOA/s1600/IMG_1425.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-j1wzdOuq754/VKgy9ecSZrI/AAAAAAAAAjs/-A9aGqlxFOA/s1600/IMG_1425.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]The Peña Cortada Aqueduct, near Chelva[/td][/tr]
[/table]
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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| (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-J2k6qE565bk/VKgyzNJjseI/AAAAAAAAAjk/PpYoR-NURbE/s1600/IMG_1422.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-J2k6qE565bk/VKgyzNJjseI/AAAAAAAAAjk/PpYoR-NURbE/s1600/IMG_1422.jpg) | | Jules in the tunnels, proving the Sun really does shine out of her arse. |
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You really know the art of seduction my friend.
;D[/td][/tr][/table]
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BIFF! (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2015/02/biff.html)
2 February 2015, 10:09 am
It's clear to even the most casual observer of our sport that footwork ruins climbing.
Whatever type of climbing you do, from alpine gnarl fests to Lancashire lowball grovel-problems, we're all just big kids farting about. With that in mind, go watch kids at play; swinging about on the monkey bars, signalling their glee with that mixture of laughter and high pitch shrieking unique to the under nines. You see how much fun they're having? You see them using their feet? Exactly.
Those nice chaps at beastmaker (http://www.beastmaker.co.uk/) understand this. Which is why they organised the BIFF; the beastmaker international footless festival. The strongest climbers from all around were invited to take part in an evening devoted to the subtle art of campusing. With the climbing works (http://www.climbingworks.com/) playing hosts and the money raised being donated to CAC (http://www.climbersagainstcancer.org/) it was always going to be the comp event of the year.
As one of the elder statesmen of footless showboating I was both flattered and pleased to receive my invite, and immediately undertook a gruelling training schedule of 50m vertical Spanish stamina plods as preparation. All of which prepared me perfectly for last night's mayhem.
The format was thus; there were 15 footless problems to sink your teeth into, and you scored 30 points for a clean ascent, regardless of how many goes you took. For the true thugs, who were overwhelmed by the technical nature of actual climbing, there were also a series of foot-free challenges, including a pull up contest, a dead hanging sufferfest and a baggy hand crack. Quite rightly, success on these pure feats of strength could win you quite a few points. I fared poorly on the powerful problems (see below), but my honour was saved by the crack, which allowed me to put my fleshy spade-hands to good use. I was less impressive on the minuscule slopey dead hang edge; collapsing after 30s in awe of the steel fingered mutants (Davies and Barrans) who stayed on for around a minute!
What a night! Everyone was there: we had the original pocket power midgets Roddy Mackenzie and Ru Davies, and their modern equivalent Dave Barrans. Sam Whitaker had chosen a tasteful yellow vest to properly display the biggest guns in showbiz. Dave Mason was not to be outdone with his shiny gold pants - a look that Jerry would have been proud of. Pleasingly, there were plenty of women present too; notably including world champion Jule Wurm and Michaela "strong as fuck" Tracy. The evening also introduced me to Louis Parkinson - eventual winner and genuine mutant. I have seen the future, and it has no feet.
Throughout the night there was plenty of liquid refreshment to be had, and the commentary/barracking from Percy Bishton and Martin "king of the wave" Smith kept anyone from taking things too seriously. The anarchic atmosphere was helped by the fact that bonus points (in the form of colorful stickers) were being handed out by the judges for any reason that took their fancy. This was a brilliant idea, though I was not really helped by the two stickers that ended up covering both lenses of my glasses.
The end of the night saw the grand finale, with the best deadhangers invited to take part in a highball deadhang duel to the death. This was a contest which saw some astonishing displays of savagery from people I'd previously considered to be fine, upstanding citizens. The event was "won" by Dave and Michaela, but also notable was Tom Newman's brutal roundhouse kick to the chest of a barely prepared Ru Davies. Expect a court summons in the post soon, Tom.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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:2thumbsup:
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:dance1:
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BIFF! (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2015/02/biff.html)
pocket power midgets
:lol:
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I have seen the future, and it has no feet.
Genius :lol:
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Best fun I've had at a comp that, but "climbing problems footless" is another thing to add to the list of stuff that i am bad at. As usual a poor performance has made me really keen to train :weakbench:
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It was ace, wasn't it Roddie?
BTW - the videos embedded in the post don't seem to show on UKB, so click through if you want to see Ru get what's coming to him
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It was ace, wasn't it Roddie?
Did you survive uninjured Stu?
I've got some great footage from way back when (April the 5th some year) when BoulderUK opened of Roddy locking his way up what were then quite new French Rock blobs, not only holding a conversation but chewing gum simultaneously. Also in this video is Malc getting somewhat confused by a problem that Pete Hurley cruises and Gaz grunting his way up a problem facing outwards...
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It might have actually helped clear some minor gripes up.
Be good to see that video. There's not enough footage of Roddie in his prime and in full flow...
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It was ace, wasn't it Roddie?
BTW - the videos embedded in the post don't seem to show on UKB, so click through if you want to see Ru get what's coming to him
also fun to find out that you had a heavier paper round than i had imagined ;) :sorry:
i just clicked through to see the videos. i think the one of you swinging off the balls is better :lol:
i am only just starting to hurt today, expecting full DOMS tomorrow.
I've got some great footage from way back when (April the 5th some year) when BoulderUK opened of Roddy locking his way up what were then quite new French Rock blobs, not only holding a conversation but chewing gum simultaneously. Also in this video is Malc getting somewhat confused by a problem that Pete Hurley cruises and Gaz grunting his way up a problem facing outwards...
sounds like solid gold that footage :clap2:
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Post it!
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I would also like to know the specs of the slopey edge used for the deadhang comp, in order to replicate it.
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LOL, classic Nibble there :)
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Ru's lack of street fighting apprenticeship certainly showed there.
I would also like to know the specs of the slopey edge used for the deadhang comp, in order to replicate it.
I'm surprised at you being so slap dash about this Nibile, surely you also need relative humidity and temp reports as well in order to compare?
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My friend. I do have a thermometer AND a hygrometer in the room where I train. The question is: did The Works monitor temp and humidity? I bet they didn't.
It's just like asking a lady her age. The safest option is not asking.
;)
Well put, by the way, made me LOL.
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I would also like to know the specs of the slopey edge used for the deadhang comp, in order to replicate it.
I think (someone check please) it was approx 6mm thick strip of wood which had a 6mm radius on it, so had no horizontal surface on the top at all. it was really long though, so you could have your hands wide enough apart that your thumbs were on top whilst crimping. thumbs underneath were not allowed. it was purchased from BandQ
it was really ayah and quite ouchy to try and hold. i was rubbish on it. :chair:
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Resting jug!
Sounds errrr.....I can't wait for the Nibile video, do they have B&Q in Italy?
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Thumbs on top? Disgusting.
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Your Dad isn't swiss is he Nibs?
(http://annied.blog.com/files/2012/10/Swiss-Toni-570x300.jpg)
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Thumbs on top? Disgusting.
Maybe that's where I went wrong.
My index finger didn't like my thumb riding on it, so I put my tomb on the wood instead. I'm not really a crimper.
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Thumbs on top? Disgusting.
Maybe that's where I went wrong.
My index finger didn't like my thumb riding on it, so I put my tomb on the wood instead. I'm not really a crimper.
That sounds a bit grave.
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Bleedin' bivy ledges!
Hmmm... That sounds a bit tricky to be honest... The slopey edge seems very challenging.
Will figure out something anyway, although I have no idea about how to carve a 6 mm radius on the edge.
Maybe filling in the lower rungs of a BM with some cardboard to make them 6 mm deep? :-\
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That sounds a bit grave.
I'm not that old :(
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Bleedin' bivy ledges!
Hmmm... That sounds a bit tricky to be honest... The slopey edge seems very challenging.
Will figure out something anyway, although I have no idea about how to carve a 6 mm radius on the edge.
Maybe filling in the lower rungs of a BM with some cardboard to make them 6 mm deep? :-\
Maybe you could ask Ned or Dan (or graeme of there's still a bit at the works ) to post you an offcut :D
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No way. I'm still waiting for my replica of hold n.9 of Pinches Wall.
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Be good to see that video. There's not enough footage of Roddie in his prime and in full flow...
I'll need to borrow a HV-series camera or suchlike as it's on MiniDV... Lagers? I'd give you my tapes but god knows what you might see :shag:
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It was like this stuff Nibs, but I've no idea if it was 5mm or 6mm - around that though. For the purposes of your re-creation, conditions were ok, it was quite cold.
(http://media.builderdepot.co.uk/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/j/0/j001977_b-01.jpg)
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Be good to see that video. There's not enough footage of Roddie in his prime and in full flow...
I'll need to borrow a HV-series camera or suchlike as it's on MiniDV... Lagers? I'd give you my tapes but god knows what you might see :shag:
If its a vid of Nat by herself, could I have a copy? If its starring you as well then please destroy for the good of humanity.
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I do have some trim like that I could send over, but I checked and it's only just 5mm, sorry Nibs.
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Cheers everyone.
Thanks for finding me a new way to spend the rest of the Winter!
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CWIF 2015 (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2015/03/cwif-2015.html)
9 March 2015, 11:09 am
Weight: 9st 10lbs (ground zero)
Bottles of Pepsi Max: 1
Finger Tendon Integrity (FTI): 0.78
Every year I write an entry about the CWIF. I don't really know why I bother, since you could basically cut and paste the one from the previous year. Great problems, blah, blah, cool atmosphere blah, blah, insert excuses, very psyched, watch out for me in the BBCs, etc, etc. I always have a great time at the comp, and always do terribly due to a lack of flexibility/talent/skin, but never actually enter the BBCs because I always go climbing the Sunday after the CWIF and get horribly injured.
I don't know what to write this year.
For a start, I'm not sure I did that terribly. Yes, I came way down the rankings, and Vladimir Putin has as much chance of winning the Nobel Peace Prize as I did of getting to the semi-finals, but for once I didn't fall off all the easy problems. Even my flexibility didn't let me down too badly, since I have discovered the miracle of squats (http://ukbouldering.com/board/index.php?topic=19061.0). In all honesty I wasn't fit enough for 30 problems in an afternoon, and I did about as well as I could have hoped. I even achieved my lifetime's dream of beating Southern England's Nicest Climber, Gavin Symmonds - a pyrrhic victory given the amount he's been climbing this year, but I'll take it!
Also, since my wife insisted on a strict "no climbing after comps" rule, my battered old frame is moderately intact, although the RH middle finger which gave me so much trouble last year is grumbling ominously today. Thankfully I had scheduled in a couple of easy weeks before Rainshadow training starts in earnest. With a following wind, and a bit of sense, I might get to enter the BBCs this July after all...
And so the comp season is over. The endurance training is about to start, and today I begin the unpleasant and unwelcome campaign to get down to fighting weight. Let's see what the spring brings!
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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CWIF 2015 (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2015/03/cwif-2015.html)
Weight: 9st 10lbs (ground zero)
... and today I begin the unpleasant and unwelcome campaign to get down to fighting weight.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
Ha! I'm imagining office-bound 12 stone sport climbers all over the land reading this and raging!
'Hate the game not the playa'
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Not 5'6" ones I imagkne
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Not 5'6" ones I imagkne
that'll be me then
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I'm 172 cm tall so 5'6", but I'm quite heavier than you Stu!
65 kg should be 10,3 stones. How much weight are you going to drop?
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172cm = 6'8" lore...
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6'6" is ~2m... 172 cm is 5'7.7".
Edit: guessing Duma mistyped. Sorry for the dimensional pendantry!
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172cm = 6'8" lore...
5'8".
But ditch the imperial units.
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I just used an online converter...
:shrug:
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You've got a bit of muscle nibs, stu was mostly fat on Saturday. Lot of weight to lose there I reckon
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Not to mention a sizeable Italian sausage.
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Stu's a fatty, he's got loads to lose
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So I'm 167cm and 62.5 kg for you metric heads out there. I figure it's got to be jelly, because jam just don't shake like that.
I'm only looking to lose about 1-1.5 kg, which takes me nowhere near Megos territory who is 173cm and 57kg. :sick:
I know from experience that losing any more weight makes me too unhappy to climb; most of the time I'm pretty happy in my current slightly podgy form but Rainshadow is going to require a bit of sacrifice, sadly.
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I'd keep it on until you've tried it a bit (slight short term misery perhaps). Then drop and boom the route will feel easier ;). That's my strategy this year anyway, got to save up the impact.
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I like your style, but I'm camping up there in a few weeks for some early season sessions on the route, and I want to get a fairly accurate gauge for how much work needs doing. Hence I want to be in decent shape for that week. After that I'll pile it back on until the autumn. I hate being light.
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Furry muff.
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I'm only looking to lose about 1-1.5 kg, which takes me nowhere near Megos territory who is 173cm and 57kg. :sick:
Christ, that's borderline cheating.
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Yeah, he's quite skinny. I think my legs weigh as much as his whole body. I need helium filled tights.
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I'm only looking to lose about 1-1.5 kg, which takes me nowhere near Megos territory who is 173cm and 57kg. :sick:
My weight varies by that throughout the week (always measured first thing every morning, before any eating / drinking). So you've no need for any dieting - just try to co-ordinate your bowels with red-pointing sessions - I bet there's an app for it somewhere!
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You're a bunch of funny mofos, both in Imperial and metric units.
;D
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I'm only looking to lose about 1-1.5 kg, which takes me nowhere near Megos territory who is 173cm and 57kg. :sick:
That amazes me i would have put him down as a good 10kg more than you. Not that he is big just thought you were in the proper pre pubescent category not just the teenage one.
Bens lighter than you mind by a good few pounds and 5`10"
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Moony and Mcclure have the best strength to weight ratio in the country.
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Combined, still.
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I've always thought skinny wee Ondra was 58kg and 180cm (5'11"). He was. Now the heavy fucker is 68kg! How can I only be 4kg heavier than Ondra and still be so shit hahaa. :popcorn:
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I've always thought skinny wee Ondra was 58kg and 180cm (5'11"). He was. Now the heavy fucker is 68kg! How can I only be 4kg heavier than Ondra and still be so shit hahaa. :popcorn:
68? Surely, that's including a rope, a rack, the shirt on his back, and the alpine boots?
(1.795 m, 70 kg. Two kg less would not take me up a 9b+)
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That's what he said in the recent interview. It could all be lies!
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Staycation (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2015/04/staycation.html)
14 April 2015, 2:57 pm
Weight: 61.5 kg (for you euros out there)Bottles of Pepsi Max: 56Finger Tendon Integrity (FTI): 0.72
This was a mistake.
Jules and I huddled together in our tent for warmth as the gales drilled the rain sideways. Earlier still we had gazed into the hollow eyes of the only other team fool enough to stick it out on the Catwalk. And, before that, a text from Toby - "If you're heading to Malham, turn round now". Not an auspicious start to our 2 weeks holiday in the Dales. The following morning revealed the full extent of the damage; Malham had soaked up the rain like a sponge and sulked with a black face at the head of the dale. In the pub we checked flight prices, EU breakdown cover. Too expensive. Time for plan C. We packed the sodden tent and went home.
Take 2: LPT. Different crag, same scenes. We try to press ourselves into the cliff face to escape the showers and icy wind that is howling round the bay. If we could summon the energy to look up it would be clear that Welsh climbers are a hardier lot than their Yorkshire counterparts. Every dry route is adorned with a suffering climber. It's too much for us, so we head back upstairs to the relative shelter of Parisella's Cave. Between the wet streaks are some damp holds, and we manage to warm up for the first time in several days. I get some nice ticks by performing extended hikes from one random point to another. Apparently, this passes for a boulder problem in the cave*. It's clear that my strength and fitness is on the up! Later on, Caff emerges from LPT to show us what real men are capable of - quietly confirming he despatched his 8c+ project despite the damp holds and arctic weather. We head to the Bangor Travelodge for some sleep, then bang out another Parisella's session the next day. It is wetter. We go home again.
This holiday is becoming a farce. It's clear that something radical needs to be done. But what? We look at buying a house in Spain, or giving up climbing, but in the end we decide to go Trad climbing. Once we've managed to find our rack we drive down to Pembroke and our punt pays off - we pass the Gower to emerge blinking into the Sunlight. The strange warmth of the Sun on our faces is like the best food or drink I've ever had - enthusiasm and energy floods back into me as we sit in the tent, waiting to go climbing.
However.
I'd forgotten I'm the worse trad climber in Britain. I kick off the weekend with an attempt to romp up the classic "Get Some In". My body doesn't quite know how to behave. I try to dance lightly up the rock but my arms are locked rigid and my hips are fused by nervous tension. If this is dancing, I'm listening to Kraftwerk. In the mistaken belief that I can banish my fear by sacrificing my wires to the crag, I empty my rack into the cliff. Nut after nut vanishes into the depths. Unsurprisingly I become pumped, and climb down to the ground to stare meaningfully out to sea until the pain subsides. Then I repeat the whole shameful exercise, only to run out of wires entirely shortly before the crux. Any resolve I have disappears with my last wire, and I lower to the ground.
[tr][td](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-SZLMcUt_vjI/VS0cHKELm-I/AAAAAAAAAoM/4h2-J2sj8gU/s1600/IMG_1520.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-SZLMcUt_vjI/VS0cHKELm-I/AAAAAAAAAoM/4h2-J2sj8gU/s1600/IMG_1520.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Jules staring meaningfully out to sea. This is what Pembroke is all about.[/td][/tr]
[/table]
Thankfully, the brilliant thing about trad climbing is that it's brilliant. So I spend the next few days climbing classic E1s and E2s in the sun, and remembering how gear works, and what ice cream tastes like. Jules outdoes herself. She used to have the worst trad-sport differential imaginable; failing on VS in the same month as climbing 8b. This weekend she takes it all in her stride and leads her hardest trad routes in all environments, multi-pitch, tidal - you name it. By the end of the weekend we are emptying our racks into routes of the same difficulty, so she's officially better than me now, since my sport onsight grade is higher. It's the best bank holiday weekend in ages, and ages and ages. But you can't just spend all your time having fun, can you? And Malham must be dry by now. So we drive north with tanned faces and smiles that run deep.
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-00QL9m35oqU/VS0cHC_rhsI/AAAAAAAAAoQ/EsG0V6-MBIQ/s1600/IMG_1523.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-00QL9m35oqU/VS0cHC_rhsI/AAAAAAAAAoQ/EsG0V6-MBIQ/s1600/IMG_1523.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Enjoying the Malham sun in our massive tent[/td][/tr]
[/table]
Malham is dry. And hotter than Venus. A cruel twist of fate - the heat we prayed for a week ago has undone us. But heat at Malham is only an issue for those without patience. We drink coffee and lie in; waiting for the sun to drift away from our projects. Some mornings we enjoy our newly discovered love of trad by sampling the crusty classics on the right wing. The evenings are reserved for Rainshadow efforts. It is going well; I feel strong on the crux, and easily better my best links from last year.
[tr][td](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-KTTOlrllSMM/VS0cHKLlmCI/AAAAAAAAAoc/C_sF2M_eC2k/s1600/IMG_1524.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-KTTOlrllSMM/VS0cHKLlmCI/AAAAAAAAAoc/C_sF2M_eC2k/s1600/IMG_1524.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Malham in the evening sun. Ellis-Butler Barker finds out that Bat Route is longer than Anstey's Cove[/td][/tr]
[/table]
When we were living through the ice-age at LPT, Caff and I had been chatting about Rainshadow. He said he'd be red-pointing if he'd done the links I had. The thought squatted in my mind like a toad. So when Saturday came and the mercury dropped I squeaked my boots and set off from the ground for the first time...
...and promptly fell off.
Actually, I did alright. There are two really hard moves on the crux - an optimistic lunge for a tiny RH pinch on the lip of the roof, and the following snatch to a much wider pinch above. I managed the first hard move, and fell of the second. In theory only one hard move lies between me and a chance to break onto the easier upper wall. However, progress towards that move can be measured in a million tiny increments. On my first RP I had about 500,000 tiny increments to make up. My second and third RPs were much worse - I barely managed the first hard move at all.
But we're away! I am officially on RP. I'm also starting to lose finger tendon integrity (FTI) on the crucial finger, so attempts are going to have to be few and far between, and I'll try and make them count. Because if that lanky clown Barrows can climb 9a (http://www.ukclimbing.com/news/item.php?id=69634), then anyone can...
*only kidding Parisella's. I love you really.
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Great stuff Stu.
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Yep nice ramblings there ;D
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Cheers guys. A compliment from dense. I just fell in my soup.
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Great writing Stu.. UK Climbing at its worst and best.
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I didn't expect to be taken seriously ;)
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;D
Good stuff Stu!
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I like it!
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Hilarious. I guess cos you're trying Rainshadow you thought you'd piss Get some in, eh?
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No. I thought I'd piss it because I usually piss Pembroke E5s.
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OOOooh! Except when you don't.
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Great blog as usual! Cheers :) :great:
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Should've done more deadlifting probably.
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Stu I think your blog is brilliant.
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Great stuff as usual.
Begs the question, which Pembroke E5s should I be aiming for? I've been spanked on Sunlover wall and done the usual suspects in The Leap other than Darkness at Noon. The latter is screamingly obviously My Sort Of Route that I would have just answered my question except it is hard to get tides, conditions and fitness to coincide.
Climbing was slightly frustrating given the great conditions, several of my long-term targets were well-chalked.
Get Some In is/was a target since I attempted it onsight in 1980, before the first ascent. I got about 3/4 way up before running out of gas. I abbed for the gear and and checked the moves but unfortunately it pissed down all day the following day and we had to go back to Sheffield. It would be good to go back and finish the job.
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Easiest two I've done are Ships that Pass in the Night and Headhunter.
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From what I remember Get some in wasn't too bad but offers a perfect scenario for a flash pump. Nasty landing, undercut start, comes at you straight away, fiddly gear whilst you're low enough to need to keep placing it.
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Easiest two I've done are Ships that Pass in the Night and Headhunter.
:agree:
If you like susatined, well- protected, bridging then Beat Surrender at Lydstep is another option.
Dogs of Hoare was tough at E4 but I didn't question the grade at the time and is now given E5 so must be bottom end. Great route but funny glassy rock
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I've done Headhunter.
Ships... is on the list. I'm generally OK with routes where the gear is spaced but these days I need to know I'm definitely not going to hit anything. I presume something in that gear cluster before the jug is A1.
I can see Get Some In requiring some creative down-climbing. I'm OK with that.
Beat Surrender is an interesting suggestion. I have particularly inflexible hips but I'm usually fairly good in corners if the bridging is not too wide.
My forte is routes that are a bit run out, requiring commitment but not seriously dangerous. Endurance rather than bouldering. 3D weirdness like chimneys is also good. Keep them coming!
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I don't remember Beat Surrender being bridging particularly, certainly not wide bridging. More like techy laybacking. Agree it is sustained though.
Get some in should be fine if you warm up, both on the day and in trad generally. I think it's the downclimbing that gets you, the rests aren't great and you'd be better going up.
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If you're not a midget then Minotaur down the Leap is an obvious candidate
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:off:
If you're not a midget then Minotaur down the Leap is an obvious candidate
me and my chipont'shoulder would love to hear stories of midgets slaying the minotaur, anyone?
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My forte is routes that are a bit run out, requiring commitment but not seriously dangerous.
John Wayne at St Govans should be on your list.
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me and my chipont'shoulder would love to hear stories of midgets slaying the minotaur, anyone?
I've watched Bransby piss it a couple of times. And Caff. I doubt Steve Mac struggles either. I bet Hazel has done it. And of course Midgets himself usually pisses Pembroke E5s. Does that help?
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Barbarella is good, well protected crux start loads of gear to the break and a crimpy head wall, very exciting climbing!
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:off:
If you're not a midget then Minotaur down the Leap is an obvious candidate
me and my chipont'shoulder would love to hear stories of midgets slaying the minotaur, anyone?
Minotaur I thought was very steady. It's a tricky move if you're short but it's more about pulling harder rather than some reach moves which are about being taller.
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This is good to hear as I've always wanted to do it. I can remember Unclesomebody being rather unimpressed with the size of the hold for that move though?
T_B was telling me this had gone down to E4 the other night which I'm glad to hear is wrong :P
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My forte is routes that are a bit run out, requiring commitment but not seriously dangerous. Endurance rather than bouldering. 3D weirdness like chimneys is also good. Keep them coming!
Begs the question, which Pembroke E5s should I be aiming for? I've been spanked on Sunlover wall and done the usual suspects in The Leap other than Darkness at Noon. The latter is screamingly obviously My Sort Of Route that I would have just answered my question except it is hard to get tides, conditions and fitness to coincide.
Duncan
As I'm sure you realise, your description of your forte routes above, is actually a perfect description of excactly what Darkness at Noon involves! If it isn't top of your wishlist for Pembroke E5s then it probably should be.
As for conditions, I had never seen Darkness dry in my many visits to the Leap. But after doing Orange Robe Burning on a perfect day a few years ago, I decided that Darkness simply had to in nick, and so we abbed into the Leap. Walking down the beach, I was gutted to find the Darkness wall glinting with moisture, just as it always had been. But something told me to have a closer look, despite appearances being wholly offputting. I got on it, and discovered that it was actually snuff dry, and the glinting surface was just some weird optical illusion. I haven't a clue whether it had actually been wet on the previous occasions, but I know definitively that the day I did it, the route looked soaking and was actually bone.
So, remember to have a closer look, particularly if there is a bit of a drying breeze blowing through the Leap.
Darkness at Noon (along with Woeful) is the best route I've done in done in the Leap. In fact it is one of the best E5s I've done anywhere.
Neil
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Ye Minotaur is a lock off so as long as you're not short and weak...
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Ye Minotaur is a lock off so as long as you're not short and weak...
fuck.
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Neil - what's the second pitch of Darkness like? Are they both E5?
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The second pitch involves tunnelling through a hole or something daft. It's well good. E3 or E4 5c.
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I think the tunnelling is optional Tom you bloody sandbagger
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Yeah can't really remember tbh, just remember my mate leading that pitch and getting in a bit of a tangle
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My forte is routes that are a bit run out, requiring commitment but not seriously dangerous.
John Wayne at St Govans should be on your list.
That's interesting. I'd sort of dismissed it as being basically a sport-route. I'll take a closer look.
:off:
If you're not a midget then Minotaur down the Leap is an obvious candidate
me and my chipont'shoulder would love to hear stories of midgets slaying the minotaur, anyone?
Minotaur I thought was very steady. It's a tricky move if you're short but it's more about pulling harder rather than some reach moves which are about being taller.
I've done Minotaur. I'm very average height and it seemed OK. More to the point, my 5'5" mate lead it. He's a 7c rather than 8c leader. He might have had a little pop on the long move.
Barbarella is good, well protected crux start loads of gear to the break and a crimpy head wall, very exciting climbing!
I've been spanked on Sunlover wall.
Barbarella administered the spanking. I was going quite well at the time too. Well-protected but seemed extremely pumpy. Perhaps I wasn't warmed up properly or something.
As for conditions, I had never seen Darkness dry in my many visits to the Leap. But after doing Orange Robe Burning on a perfect day a few years ago, I decided that Darkness simply had to in nick, and so we abbed into the Leap. Walking down the beach, I was gutted to find the Darkness wall glinting with moisture, just as it always had been. But something told me to have a closer look, despite appearances being wholly offputting. I got on it, and discovered that it was actually snuff dry, and the glinting surface was just some weird optical illusion. I haven't a clue whether it had actually been wet on the previous occasions, but I know definitively that the day I did it, the route looked soaking and was actually bone.
So, remember to have a closer look, particularly if there is a bit of a drying breeze blowing through the Leap.
Darkness at Noon (along with Woeful) is the best route I've done in done in the Leap. In fact it is one of the best E5s I've done anywhere.
That's excellent beta, without being beta. Just the sort of thing I was hoping to get. Darkness is clearly the right answer but, like you, I'd dismissed it as looking wringing wet every time I'd ever had a look at it.
Thanks everyone!
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Isn't Barberella supposed to be French 7b or so. More physical than the other suggestions...
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I doubt it's 7b, but Orange Robe Burning to the right might feel easier if you're better on your feet/don't mind a bit of bold.
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I thought ORB felt pretty tough - not E6 but certainly towards the top-end of E5.
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I can remember Unclesomebody being rather unimpressed with the size of the hold for that move though?
IIRC there is an intermediate which you get at more or less full reach. The trick is to bump again to a jug (easier for the tall obvs), Keith probably pulled through.
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Neil - what's the second pitch of Darkness like? Are they both E5?
I don't think it's much more than E3, Stu. It's just a short lived layback, which I can't imagine causing any trouble to an 8b leader, whatever their gender... ;)
I think the first person I heard had gone tunnelling was Sophie W. I was amazed, as it had never occurred to me when I had done it a few years before. But I do remember standing on the shelf after the layback and suddenly realising I was looking straight down at my belayer through a tube in the rock that I'd scarcely noticed as I'd climbed past its lower end.
The potential for 'substantial' threads in Huntsman's Leap is really quite impressive!
Neil
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[emoji3] fantastic. That's gone straight up to number 1 on the list. Just got to get up it now, or Johnny will never let me forget it.
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I read your blog and then I had a dream about Jules that night, which would have been awesome except you were in it as well. We were at a theme park and you and Jules jumped the queue and I was really pissed off a) because Jules was married to you and not me, and b) because you jumped the queue.
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me and my chipont'shoulder would love to hear stories of midgets slaying the minotaur, anyone?
I've watched Bransby piss it a couple of times. And Caff. I doubt Steve Mac struggles either. I bet Hazel has done it. And of course Midgets himself usually pisses Pembroke E5s. Does that help?
:lol: classic. Alarmingly some people actually think this is answering the question. Oh well Hazel doesn't climb 9a so it must be fine for the E4/5 midget.
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Fiend bloody right it answers the question. Doesn't matter if they all climb 9c, they also all*reached the holds* therefore reach is *not* an excuse.
That's one thing I like about alpine climbing - height is pretty much irrelevant you short arsed fuckers ;-)
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Yes, cos like Ben everyone can easily lock off below their waist.
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Fiend bloody right it answers the question. Doesn't matter if they all climb 9c, they also all*reached the holds* therefore reach is *not* an excuse.
That's one thing I like about alpine climbing - height is pretty much irrelevant you short arsed fuckers ;-)
I made sure to count when I did it, and the Frendo took me 1806 more steps than my lanky companion. No wonder I was so tired.
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Things which are dull (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2015/04/things-which-are-dull.html)
21 April 2015, 11:45 pm
I read Moby Dick once. The whole thing from cover to cover. It's supposed to be a classic, but I'm too lowbrow to get it, I suppose. It was quite the dullest thing I've ever read. At one point, Melville abandons all pretence of keeping the narrative going, and spends a few pages simply listing things which are white.
I mention this because about the only thing I know which is duller than those pages is ballooning around on jugs endlessly, hoping to get fit. This evening was gorgeous; one of those pure azure skies that stretches forever. I left the office in a t-shirt and cycled to the wall with a heavy heart. Sometimes it sucks to go indoors. It helps to be honest with ourselves. It would be more fun to go out, and bathe the soul in sunshine. But something compels me not too. I am sacrificing my happiness for the sake of my ambition.
I know it's worth it.
Today's training session was brutal. Hours of fingerboarding leaves the fingers screaming. Endless reps on two fingers, massive iron plates dangling from my harness. Joints, skin and muscles all scream alike. At least the core exercises give my fingers a rest.
And then comes the real drudgery. Half an hour on the wall. There's barely anyone else here of course, so I can climb where I please. Nevertheless, I loop round the same overhanging section; a hamster in a wheel. When the timer beeps I allow myself five minutes rest and then it's back on. Another half an hour.
A list of things that are white. John Major. Grocery shopping. Endless bloody stamina training. The only thing not dull is the pain. Weakness leaving the body. I hope so. Barrows had a poster on his fridge. "Nothing tastes as good as 9a feels". He's an idiot. But this is my sacrifice. This drudgery. I pray it will pay off. But (whisper it), even if it doesn't I won't be too sad. I'm kind of having fun...
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Ha, great post! Going through the same experience except much reduced volume and aiming 4 grades lower - last night was beautiful and I was in the mill doing the final campus session while the rest of north wales (in my imagination) was in the pass, on gogarth or down the orme. After a great sesh it felt satisfying being a contrarian.
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It looked like you were having a blast to me. There's something distinctly satisfying about 'suffering productively'.
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Great post Stu. Sounds like an excerpt of Jerry's book.
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*squeaky voice* "This one's for you Didier!"
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Stu, will you adopt me?
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I'd lv to see nibs calling stu dad :ohmy:
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Stu, will you adopt me?
will you make fresh pasta?
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Yes. And I'll make you a proud dad by beating the shit out of those who annoy you at the crag, or at the gym.
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Feel the same about Moby Dick, most over rated book of all time*.
*Not including any religious texts.
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Moby Dick is class you heathens
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Feel the same about Moby Dick, most over rated book of all time*.
*Not including any religious texts.
more than the great gatsby? pfffftttt
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And that crap that guy had when he shot John Lennon, catcher in the wank.
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Bored of the rings.
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Punishment and Punishment
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>>>>>>>>>>> Book Thread
(I love Moby Dick, Lord of the Rings and Great Gatsby)
More about the problems of training when the weather is nice!
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You didn't mention marking...
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Yes. And I'll make you a proud dad by beating the shit out of those who annoy you at the crag, or at the gym.
Why did this come to mind?
(http://www.gorbould.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/master_blaster.jpg)
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I've received nicer compliments over time...
;D
I like the mask though. And of course I would totally crush Mad Max.
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I think you get off lightly compared to Stu :)
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Wait, where am I in that picture?
Oh, hang on...
I see him now - the tiny one, yes?
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Yarp.
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Nevermind dad, I still love you and consider you my role model.
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Is it possible to be a decent climber and NOT have to do all this type of boring stuff that involves not being outside on rock?
I know I should probably be training indoors but I'm looking for genuine reasons not to. Does the feeling of climbing something really hard make up for spending half your time climbing time (or more) training?
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Is it possible to be a decent climber and NOT have to do all this type of boring stuff that involves not being outside on rock?
Yes, but unfortunately it seems you have to be naturally gifted. Back around, genes.
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Does the feeling of climbing something really hard make up for spending half your time climbing time (or more) training?
As Stu said, its quite fun.
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Yeh, figured as much.
Think I'm a naturally talented athlete in general (find most sports easy to get good at) but have naturally shit finger pulleys! I guess I'm only going to improve their strength via boring training.
I was thinking of people like Haydn who seem to only climb but 'crush' stuff. Bastard (no offence Haydn).
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it's defo possible to train stuff like that on rock - go do loads of laps on an appropriate route instead of doing it at the wall. Go bouldering on lime instead of fingerboarding or going on a board indoors. It just takes a more time than going inside so you'll struggle unless you've got a lot of spare time or can trade off talent. Stu went and did his ancap at the tor the other night - stopwatch geekery and glorious outdoors all rolled into 1
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From what I gather Hayden climbs more than any other person I know, combine that with a psyche so strong Cuadrilla are looking at fracking it and he probably doesn't need the wall that much.
I often feel guilty about not going to the wall this time of year but then I remember that i'm a) hairy and b) have no attention span
look, a squirrel
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Bloody keen people polishing up our rock to do their ancap training!
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Inside or out, training is boring.
I tried to find the video of Homer chasing a squirrel on youtube but only found one of him chasing Uter, then got bored and gave up.
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Inside or out, training is awesome.
I tried to find the video of Homer chasing a squirrel on youtube but only found one of him chasing Uter, then got bored and gave up.
Fixed that for you.
You can be great and never train. You can train and never be great.
You'll never be great without focus, and oh look a squirrel.
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Is it possible to be a decent climber and NOT have to do all this type of boring stuff that involves not being outside on rock?
Yes, but unfortunately it seems you have to be naturally gifted. Back around, genes.
Bollocks. Imagine those trainers had spent all that time they spend training moving on rock instead. Hey presto, 'naturally gifted' climbers, and their trainer friends moan that they will have to go inside and get strong because they aren't so lucky...
Beautiful night tonight, think I might go soloing at Stanage, and then find somewhere comfortable and linger in the nice gritstone evening reading (and enjoying, because my soul didn't atrophy training) Moby Dick.
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Out of this discussion is missing the vital bit about 'depends on the end goal'.
JB - from what I know and can infer, the probability of you ever climbing properly hard on limestone is close to zero - the small uncertainly reflects a miniscule chance of you having a total personality reversal. But you're a relatively good gritstone/trad climber in general because competence (but not excellence, anymore) at this type of climbing can be achieved without recourse to indoor purgatory pleasure.
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Bollocks. Imagine those trainers had spent all that time they spend training moving on rock instead.
A significant proportion of that time would be spent "moving on rock" in the pitch dark and/or pissing rain.
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Bollocks. Imagine those trainers had spent all that time they spend training moving on rock instead. Hey presto, 'naturally gifted' climbers, and their trainer friends moan that they will have to go inside and get strong because they aren't so lucky...
Luckily you don't have to imagine because there will be a load of this type of climber at Stanage this evening. They'll be the ones bumbling up E1s.
Beautiful night tonight, think I might go soloing at Stanage, and then find somewhere comfortable and linger in the nice gritstone evening reading (and enjoying, because my soul didn't atrophy training) Moby Dick.
Good for you. I'll be at the foundry again tonight. This will give me the extra hour I need to finish the Patrick Melrose series. Let me know when you do Rainshadow.
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E1s? I was thinking more along the lines of Sharma.
I'll never even try Rainshadow obviously. It holds no appeal. I'm sure I've done some stuff you are equally unlikely to do, or that might pass Pete's criteria for excellence, but that would miss the point - which is that for me doing holds a lot more value than having done.
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I love training, but I don't have any rock near me. Well that's not true, I don't love training, but I like focusing on stuff and being as strong as I can be.
Can someone turn the clock back a fewish decades, clone me, move the clone to Sheffield, clone the clone and make one love grit regardless of connies and see who had climbed the hardest by the age of 39. Oh, and obviously don't let any of us know about each other, or else we may get a wee bit competitive.
I went through a period of not training so much indoors, but I would climb outside, if possible, every weekend, where I would do a relatively large amount of volume and then project something too hard for me every session. I got a bit better and stronger through this period, managing a few font 7c+'s, none of which were sieges.
Don't get me wrong, this was nice and everything, but I was definitely limiting myself by not training as well, but I wasn't doing routes, so shouldn't be writing this essay on stu (how come you're not older than me you've been a hero to me for years what with your comp history, flashing hard problems in bleau, training, projecting then succeeding, despite your age, how can I go on knowing I'm the old one )'s blog aggregator
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I only seem to be able to train in winter. Probably why I'll never do Rainshadow either..
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E1s? I was thinking more along the lines of Sharma.
I'll never even try Rainshadow obviously. It holds no appeal. I'm sure I've done some stuff you are equally unlikely to do, or that might pass Pete's criteria for excellence, but that would miss the point - which is that for me doing holds a lot more value than having done.
My point really was the same as Pete's. When a goal gets hard enough for you, training will be essential to achieve it. Outdoors or indoors, it makes no difference. It makes me laugh when people hold Sharma up as an example of someone who doesn't train. He's as thoughtful and systematic in his training as anyone; it's just he runs laps on routes and problems outdoors, and pretends it's just going climbing.
Your last point cuts to the heart of it. Training will help you achieve goals. But obviously there's a short term cost in not being free to go out and do whatever you wish. Whether that's worth it is obviously a personal decision and depends on how much you enjoy training, and how much you're driven by ambition.
Where I suspect we disagree a lot is on the utility of climbing indoors. I always get a very dismissive vibe from you, which I guess is based on personal distaste? That's fine of course, but I think it can lead you to make errors about how useful it can be. Sure, we all know people who can 1-5-9 but think they need to get stronger to climb 8A. I also know plenty of folk who climb outdoors all the time who have lousy technique.
No amount of outdoor climbing will get you good movement skills if you're not mindful of what you are doing. Likewise, if you pay attention to climbing well, and practice movement you can learn a lot indoors. Some of the most technically gifted climbers I've ever seen are youngsters on the comp circuit...
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What are you on about Stu, the likes of Markovic and Sachi are technically inept thugs who'll never get up anything outdoors with their shitty indoor based technique.
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Your last point cuts to the heart of it. Training will help you achieve goals. But obviously there's a short term cost in not being free to go out and do whatever you wish. Whether that's worth it is obviously a personal decision and depends on how much you enjoy training, and how much you're driven by ambition.
This. I'm one of those people who trains indoors sometimes when the sun is shining and unlike Stu, Ben or Barrows, I'm at the bottom end of the 8s not the top or even low 9s which probably makes me super uncool. Occasionally I have my frustrations with what I've chosen to do but I get more than enough fulfillment when I get to put the hard work into practice. After all, when you live in Sheffield there's actually plenty of nice days to go climbing across an entire year even if you lose the odd evening to the Foundry.
I don't aspire to numbers but I aspire to great lines and moves which are usually (not always) hard by virtue of the terrain they cover. I am nowhere near talented enough to just climb and be able to do these things that I want to do. But with a bit of monotony and the sacrifice of some instant gratification, I'm getting there and mostly loving every minute of both the training and the climbing.
This week I trained inside Monday and Wednesday and had a few people ask why I was inside. Last night I went to the WCJ cornice and did the moves on Rumble in the Jungle and had a complete blast doing great moves in an amazing setting. For me anyway I couldn't have Thursday night without the Monday & Wednesday, I'd be still on Brachiation Dance and still getting pumped on jugs without the plastic sessions. Depends what you want from climbing.
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By the way, great blog as always Stu :thumbsup:.
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Any climber within spitting distance would love to do Rainshshadow. It's one of the best routes in the country. It's 9a though so unfortunately sunny evenings on Stanage have to be sacrificed. Simples.
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I'm at the bottom end of the 8s not the top or even low 9s yet which probably makes me super uncool
Fixed that for you ;D
No amount of outdoor climbing will get you good movement skills if you're not mindful of what you are doing. Likewise, if you pay attention to climbing well, and practice movement you can learn a lot indoors.
:agree:
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Well done!
http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v523/n7562/full/nature14619.html
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Good work Stu.
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The Pinnacle of Success (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2016/01/the-pinnacle-of-success.html)
30 January 2016, 6:36 pm
So yeah, I did a thing and climbed a route. That was aeons ago now. I should have written a blog about it, but after I'd vomited all (http://www.ukclimbing.com/news/item.php?id=69962) my thoughts (http://www.climber.co.uk/news/latest-news/stu-littlefair-talks-about-his-ascent-of-rainshadow-and-kepler-16b.html) about it onto the internet, I couldn't quite face it. Most importantly, having triumphed over adversity, etc, I could relax and start to enjoy my climbing again...
Life after Rainshadow, in which piglet goes climbing
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-KhKTO6N2Cfw/VqzyD30sRVI/AAAAAAAAA1A/4R3OhG7kFNE/s400/IMG_1857.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-KhKTO6N2Cfw/VqzyD30sRVI/AAAAAAAAA1A/4R3OhG7kFNE/s1600/IMG_1857.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Montserrat South Face[/td][/tr]
[/table]So there we were in Montserrat. It's not a trendy place to go, but for a long time now I'd had an idea in my head. Fly to Spain, hire a van and tour round Catalunya enjoying the "vias largas", the classic multi pitch routes found throughout the region. It would be the perfect way to relax after Christmas; long, easy routes in the sun with Jules and a guaranteed room with a view. So far, the plan was unfolding perfectly. We'd hired a van from Cargoling (http://cargoling.com/) that was new, well equipped and comfortable. We'd done a nice easy slab in the sunshine, and had our multi pitch heads on. Time for a classic Montserrat outing.
"the rating is spicy and the distance between bolts is hot rather than spicy, but let us not forget that we are in Sant Benet, the temple of sandbagging..." - Montserrat Free Climbs (http://www.libreriadesnivel.com/libros/montserrat-free-climbs/020000572/)
So, ok, the guide was a little off-putting, but Toby had recommended this route - Brown Sugar - to us before we left. It climbs a direct route up the Momia; one of the classic Montserrat towers up above the monastery and it's only 6b+. We'd be fine...
[tr][td](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-U8QIajSDpFM/Vqz1heE7M6I/AAAAAAAAA1M/z9SKcFgkWUU/s400/IMG_1786.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-U8QIajSDpFM/Vqz1heE7M6I/AAAAAAAAA1M/z9SKcFgkWUU/s1600/IMG_1786.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]La Momia (right). Brown sugar climbs the wall just to the right of the LH gully.[/td][/tr]
[/table]Reader, I shit myself.
The first pitch is 6a+. Twenty metres. Four bolts. This is ground I should be quite happy soloing, but honestly, the rock in this part of Montserrat is like nothing else. It's like climbing blindfold. It's slabby death. Every foot of rock contains a thousand pebbles. Every pebble looks good. Each pebble is a worthless, rounded, polished son-of-a-bitch. Basically every move is the same; pick a pebble you think your foot might stick to and stand on it. Now feel around - there are quite a few pebbles to choose from so this might take you some time. Eventually, you'll find a rounded piece of shit that's just bad enough to allow to move up an inch, where you can start the whole thing all over again. So, even though this pitch is 6a+, I'm stood about 100 feet above my first bolt, and not only can I not see how to do the next move, I have no idea if I'm even in the right place. Honestly, three feet to the right it looks the same. Three feet to the left is f*cking identical. A million feet above me is the next bolt, smirking. Somehow, there has to be a route through all this to safety, but I'm buggered if I know what it is. The only thing to do is to pick a pebble...
[tr][td](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_o214rhmT30/Vqz4v05JUVI/AAAAAAAAA1Y/DtZgK_Q92Uk/s320/IMG_1872.jpg) (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_o214rhmT30/Vqz4v05JUVI/AAAAAAAAA1Y/DtZgK_Q92Uk/s1600/IMG_1872.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Pick a pebble, punk....[/td][/tr]
[/table]An hour later I lash myself to the belay and try not to hug it. I do have a rep to uphold. Jules follows me up with what I will refer to as her "concerned face", which is the one she wears when I've talked her into something and she's not 100% convinced I can get her out of it. We have a little chat, where Jules suggests we may have bitten off more than we can chew and I, possessing the memory of a goldfish, persuade her it will be fine and we should at least have a look at the crux pitch, described as "intricate and bold". Which is just my bag.
We won't dwell on this pitch, except to say that I made it up somehow, and that I made it up the next pitch as well. Eventually we fell into a rhythm of smearing and searching and guessing and trying not to think about how far you were above the bolt, or how far it was to the next one. We were making progress and had made it to the point where the guide suggested "from here the gear improves". A good job too, because each pitch was taking its toll; eroding a tiny piece of my cool and winding me up a little bit tighter. I didn't have much left before I'd snap. No bother, only two pitches left.
The next pitch was a joy. The pebbles had got bigger, the angle steeper and the bolts closer together and I swarmed upwards in the sun, loving the position, loving the climbing, loving life. After a short while I found myself at the bottom of a small groove with a hard sequence at the top, leading to easier angled rock above. The hard sequence would take me away from the bolt, so I dithered a bit - my earlier nerves returning - before clenching my jaw and smashing on through. With a bit of udging and some fancy footwork I found myself balanced on the slab and facing disaster.
I couldn't see any holds. I couldn't see any bolts above. Every direction above looked blank and hostile and unprotected. The last bolt, a quintillion miles below me, was also out of sight; buried in the back of the groove. I was stuck, I was scared and I did not know which way to go. I could feel the panic welling up. There was only one thing for it. I rested my head on the rock and screamed my little heart out. It must have helped because when I looked back up there was the belay, a few feet to the left. How about that? One easy pitch more and we were up at the summit, enjoying the views to the coast in the last light of the day. We abbed off and walked home in the dusk, with the evensong bells tolling clearly out below us.
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3SW91Cif68g/Vqz9PIw9mMI/AAAAAAAAA1k/aqOkvmInDGo/s400/IMG_1784.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3SW91Cif68g/Vqz9PIw9mMI/AAAAAAAAA1k/aqOkvmInDGo/s1600/IMG_1784.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Me and Jules on the top of the Momia. I have my traumatised face on.[/td][/tr]
[/table]After this, we moved on. We did some other routes around Catalunya but nothing else was quite like Montserrat, so we found ourselves back there towards the end of the trip enjoying easier, gentler outings and some truly outstanding single pitch routes. I'm not sure why Montserrat is so quiet; Margalef and Siurana were heaving (and freezing), but we barely encountered other climbers whilst we were there. The place has it's devotees for sure; Chris Craggs loves the place (nowhere's perfect). However, it doesn't see the attention it deserves, if you ask me. A new guidebook will help. Montserrat Free Climbs (http://www.libreriadesnivel.com/libros/montserrat-free-climbs/020000572/) is written in English and details routes on the North and South side of the mountain. It has single and multi pitch routes, both sport and trad and contains advice on the gear for most routes. This is pretty crucial; two routes the same grade can be very different days out, depending on whether the pitches have one, or twenty, bolts! It's also an inspiring guide, with great photos and tempting descriptions. Buy it, and head out here for a week or two. You won't be disappointed, although you might get your arse kicked!
[tr][td](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-BRHrZ6ta3QU/Vqz_VplMYkI/AAAAAAAAA1w/FI3SJ8FyHu8/s400/IMG_1785.jpg) (http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-BRHrZ6ta3QU/Vqz_VplMYkI/AAAAAAAAA1w/FI3SJ8FyHu8/s1600/IMG_1785.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Jules on top of the Momia[/td][/tr]
[/table]
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-dnFulUOLQa0/Vqz_ln85PkI/AAAAAAAAA2I/p1-NcssRT7c/s400/IMG_1863.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-dnFulUOLQa0/Vqz_ln85PkI/AAAAAAAAA2I/p1-NcssRT7c/s1600/IMG_1863.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Jules at the Monastery[/td][/tr]
[/table]
[tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-TH-muAuYmXk/Vqz_twHmxGI/AAAAAAAAA2U/Ob0HJeXzSAE/s400/IMG_1853.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-TH-muAuYmXk/Vqz_twHmxGI/AAAAAAAAA2U/Ob0HJeXzSAE/s1600/IMG_1853.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Abbing off Escabroni Escapullini at Can Jorba; delightful easy slab climbing on perfect rock[/td][/tr]
[/table]
[tr][td](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-xcgqCcaUZy4/Vq0AVmKwm2I/AAAAAAAAA2g/oXsef4FT2Vg/s400/IMG_1843.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-xcgqCcaUZy4/Vq0AVmKwm2I/AAAAAAAAA2g/oXsef4FT2Vg/s1600/IMG_1843.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Selfie! Above the road at Villanova de Meia[/td][/tr]
[/table][tr][td](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-x3uLMSCyOpE/Vq0AjB44slI/AAAAAAAAA2s/uLgQP_c6YXI/s400/IMG_1873.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-x3uLMSCyOpE/Vq0AjB44slI/AAAAAAAAA2s/uLgQP_c6YXI/s1600/IMG_1873.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]Top notch single pitch climbing at Vermell de Xincarro[/td][/tr]
[/table]
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Love it. Another great write up. My favorite blog!
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Montserrat is ace!
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You're not kidding; there's so much inspiring stuff to do there...
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My better half lived in Montserrat for a few years, and I moved in with her in Collbato for a half a year before we left Spain, so for a while I climbed a lot there, both on the north and the south side. Interesting place for sure.
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Love the description of the first pitch :2thumbsup:
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Seems to sum up any experience of congolmerate climbing I've ever had.
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Roots (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/2016/04/roots.html)
14 April 2016, 3:41 pm
It was my first E2. Dressed, like every aspiring rock cat, in a pair of lemon yellow lycra tights I'd created from my sister's old leotard. I'd broken out the brand new Kamet Joshua Tree's and was keeping them clean by standing on the ropes, which were slowly sinking into the mud. A few weeks later I would leave these pristine boots at Ilkley and never see them again; a mistake which would lead to months climbing in gym pumps, and a lecture about responsibility from my dad.
One of the old lags who hung suspiciously around Almscliffe every evening had told me that a number 4 rock went in just above half height. That was lucky, because I had one of those on my spartan rack. Currently it was clenched between my teeth, already clipped to the rope. I figured it would save some strength if I could just throw it in on the way past. With nothing else left to delay the inevitable I gave a quick nod to my belayer and set off. I was a sight to behold in those days; purchase for the feet was achieved by pasting blindly and trying to run my feet up faster than they slipped. Untrained power emerged erratically, and upwards progress was achieved by a series of violent spasms which were impossible to predict from the ground. This unorthodox technique got me to the wire placement and to my relief the rock swallowed the wire gladly. Sadly, my wild attempts to pass the gear resulted in me kicking it out. Hung out to dry on the break above the crux I had plenty of time to regret my empty gear loops. I wondered if I had enough strength left to stay attached to the jugs that led over the steep bulge above. Below, my un-named belayer was looking around for someone to help carry my corpse back down to the road. He didn't climb with me much after that.
Fear is something we learn (http://www.bbc.co.uk/earth/story/20151022-where-does-our-fear-of-snakes-come-from) from our experiences and from those around us. We're hard wired (http://www.apa.org/monitor/julaug05/figuring.aspx) to learn to be afraid; afraid of snakes, afraid of heights, of failure, loss, and girls. But we need the clues from our experiences and our family. "Don't go near there!" "Please be careful!" But back then a wild enthusiasm for climbing drowned out the tiny voice in my head telling me to be afraid. I just needed to climb, and if there was no-one to climb with I'd cycle out to the cliff and solo; steadily adding harder climbs into my circuit until I was spending the long summer evenings playing King of the Crag, climbing wherever I liked on a whim.
How did that bold youth end up like me? Last week I was back on an E2; a perfect spring evening on Stanage. Jules stood patiently holding the ropes, whilst I umm'ed and ahh'ed. Three perfect wires by my feet, mocking me. "Come on!", they said; "Commit!". I edged out and stroked the arete, knowing as I did so that it was a gesture. I wasn't going anywhere. Eventually I caved in to inevitable and climbed back down, stripping my gear as I went.
[tr][td](https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-IQChzbF6XeM/Vw-ovGQQBWI/AAAAAAAAA5Q/deEv35JDRK8LX_ZrJD8D3BBmd7r9Six6ACK4B/s320/STUFLYING.jpg) (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-IQChzbF6XeM/Vw-ovGQQBWI/AAAAAAAAA5Q/deEv35JDRK8LX_ZrJD8D3BBmd7r9Six6ACK4B/s1600/STUFLYING.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]This is how you get brave[/td][/tr]
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Your roots make you who you are. Roots are something we put down as we grow, but they hold us down too. They limit our freedom. Patterns spread like roots inside your brain as you learn behaviour. Somewhere along the way that bold young kid soloing around Almscliffe let a little bit of fear into his brain. There it sat, quietly laying out tendrils, until the brain was riddled with fear; nestling in every nook like ivy. Opportunities to prune the roots were missed. Instead a series of unfortunate events fed them and gave them strength.
[tr][td](https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_KHWjwpwdXw/Vw-o3IvuPOI/AAAAAAAAA5Y/OPCvwNCEifc6vRxLKfnZ4u5pw6xY6t8ZgCK4B/s320/IMG_1031.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_KHWjwpwdXw/Vw-o3IvuPOI/AAAAAAAAA5Y/OPCvwNCEifc6vRxLKfnZ4u5pw6xY6t8ZgCK4B/s1600/IMG_1031.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]This isn't.[/td][/tr]
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Gimmer Crag. May Bank Holiday 1990Leaving the stance, I rattle in a large hex which drops into the crack with a satisfying clunk. The Crack above slices the groove cleanly. An orgy of comforting jugs and solid jams leads quickly upwards, leaving the solitary hex swinging on the rope a mile below. This is the day that fear first took root. A few feet higher and the crack is seeping gently. The solid jams are soap-lined, and carelessness sees me whistling out of the crack and down, down, down. I still remember the look on the faces of the lads on the belay ledge as I shot past them. We all look up at the hex, praying it's as good as I remember. The hex, of course, holds firm. Afterwards, there's lots of uneasy banter. I check myself over for damage and I seem fine, but I didn't notice that a little chunk of fear had got lodged in the back of my brain.
Bosigran, Easter 1995Another perfect day. It's been a few days since we left Uni, a few days of golden granite and wind-chapped lips. Everyone else has packed up and headed back to the minibus, but there's still daylight and rock to climb. Somewhere around the bottom of Autumn Flakes I tighten up my boots and head upwards. From time to time I pause to look out over the Atlantic and savour the solitude and commitment. Eventually I find myself on a little sloping ledge about 30m up with a layback crack above it. The crack is a bit wet. It reminds me of Gimmer, all those years ago. The fear in the back of my brain wakes up, and reminds me to be careful. Every foot placement draws my eye back down to the ground, and reminds me that I cannot fall. I am not careful enough. There's no time to realise what happened. One minute I'm tentatively inching upwards. The next I'm on my back on the ledge. The sea hangs crazily above the grassy ledges. My foot is wedged painfully behind something, which appears to be the only thing stopping me from rolling off the ledge and dropping to the rocks below. Should I move? I can't stay here. But if I move, and my foot slips, the fall will surely kill me. Carefully, I pull myself back onto the ledge and sit shell-shocked, unable to come to terms with what just happened. I press myself to the back of the ledge and yell; hoping that someone will come and find me.
These were the big moments. The ones that really made a difference. Over the years though, thousands of little decisions let the fear grow. Decisions to back off, when I should have pressed on. Grab the clip, or take the lob. Gogarth, or Malham? Every time I take the safer option another little root starts to grow.
Pembroke, April 2016[tr][td](https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_Ux5JjMay0s/Vw-mhdfNpbI/AAAAAAAAA5E/OhiTo85plfEed2BV9LqAaLqMud7DRg8gACK4B/s320/IMG_1965.jpg) (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_Ux5JjMay0s/Vw-mhdfNpbI/AAAAAAAAA5E/OhiTo85plfEed2BV9LqAaLqMud7DRg8gACK4B/s1600/IMG_1965.jpg)[/td][/tr][tr][td]The Mighty Sutton. Ready for anything.[/td][/tr]
[/table]I've got to admit, the gear is good. It's not as close together as it could be but it's bomber kit for sure. The wall is steep and clean. Definitely safe. It's not enough to make me go for it. Instead I top-rope it clean again. Rob goes for the lead and climbs it effortlessly. Even a sudden hailstorm whilst he eyes up the runout doesn't unsettle him. After all, the wall is staying dry. What a guy! Time and tide wait for no man however. Thankfully I am spared the decision of whether to cast off or not. I don't sleep that night. The next morning the cliffs are being battered by a gale; waves breaking over the chapel. When I realise there's no climbing today the overwhelming feeling I feel is one of relief. I think it's time for some gardening (http://onlineclimbingcoach.blogspot.co.uk/2009/07/beating-fear-of-falling-in-5-sessions.html).
Source: The Spherical Cow (http://thesphericalcow.blogspot.com/)
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Great post!
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you suck Stu!
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You know it. As bad as it gets, I'll never be Barrows. I find some comfort in that.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Top puntering sir!
Black Wall Eliminate and Silica??
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Great writing. They can't take it away from you or your us.
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Top puntering sir!
Black Wall Eliminate and Silica??
Wow. Are you in my head?
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My theory is that 9a fitness gives you the luxury to hang around and dither? Most E2 leaders would have to get on with it, or fall off. Maybe you need to get onto some E6s where you won't have time to over think things?! :-\
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Nah I can't be in your head, I don't climb 9a....and I don't usually get that scared on E2s :P.
BWE would be the only E2 a yoof would aim for at Almscliff I'm sure (how did that story end??). And, I dunno Silica just popped into mind with the stretch to an arete and 3 wires at your feet. FWIW many years ago I failed to get over the lip on Silica, I think it's nails.
It's a good post, it's always interesting reading about the trials and tribulations of trad from top climbers. However I'm not sure I agree with the pictures used....I've found that soloing routes tends to make one controlled and very cautious, fine for bold easy stuff but not good for pushing oneself, conversely the right sort of training indoors (falling practise until you've earnt enough airmiles for the yearly Catalunya trip!) can make one much braver...
P.S. What t_b said ;)
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I decked out on Silica in front of Mark Leach
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Maybe there should be a special "embarrassing failures / backing off on Silica thread"??
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I decked out on Silica in front of Mark Leach
That's more like it. If only i had someone famous to land on.
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I didn’t bring any gear for the top on the advice of a friend who said there was none. I then ended up getting gripped and having to get a cam thrown up to place in the obvious bomber placement in the break. Turned out the friend had led the route after drinking half a bottle of sherry, hence not needing/noticing the gear.
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I decked out on Silica in front of Mark Leach
That's more like it. If only i had someone famous to land on.
He was stood on the ledge to the left watching me, I landed on my mate's dad on stretch like a kung-fu stunt on a b-movie budget.
Maybe there should be a special "embarrassing failures / backing off on Silica thread"??
That would be a good thread in general, go on...
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Nice blog and funny chat from you, VG!
I'd agree with both T_B and Fiend's comments - soloing makes me whimpy on trad as you(I) have to back off if it feels like I may or may not do the move comfortably. Highballing and sport climbing make me braver - sport for dealing with the pump and falling off whereas highballing trains the ability to do be scared but also needing to perform relatively tricky moves.
Like T_B said maybe you need to get a bit closer to your limit in order to focus your concentration away from the fear and onto the task in hand + don't climb on the grit! I sometimes become disproportionately scared on easier routes because I have the capacity to think about how scared I am rather than the climbing.
Hope you find your head and smash some badass trad routes!
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Very amusing. Always makes me smile when every 'improve your trad climbing' advice article suggests doing some sport climbing. Sure. Just not too much eh?
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You know it. As bad as it gets, I'll never be Barrows. I find some comfort in that.
Great writing but I just can't bring myself to wad you for being a punter
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Was the Pembroke route Point Blank?
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Very amusing. Always makes me smile when every 'improve your trad climbing' advice article suggests doing some sport climbing. Sure. Just not too much eh?
Dead right. Of course, there's sport climbing and sport climbing. I blame clipsticks for a lot of my current predicament.
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Was the Pembroke route Point Blank?
In one. I'll have to be more obscure last time.
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BWE would be the only E2 a yoof would aim for at Almscliff I'm sure (how did that story end??).
It all turns out alright in the end (so if it's not alright, then it's not the end). I pressed on and vibrated my way to the top.
Afterwards I got a bollocking from my belayer who was slightly older and wiser, because you can traverse off from where I was. We climbed together a few times afterwards; one of which was the day at Gimmer...
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God despite everything I actually really miss evenings soloing at the cliff...
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Was the Pembroke route Point Blank?
In one. I'll have to be more obscure last time.
Face it, you are just a 3 star route whore.