[Houdini]

Fraudini returned home w/ a €10 blood pressure monitor.



Apparently I should see a doctor immediately . . .      155/94.

Other info:


* Drank 1/3 bottle red ~ raises pressure.

* Eaten a minimum of 12 small cloves of pickled garlic w/ our evening salad ~ lowers pressure.

* Not smoked fags in 7 months + no weed for 2 months.

* Bit under the weather, no massive shakes - but very healthy diet - and getting quite fit.




* Eating 80% chocolate the now to con the machine into believing I'm not a zombie ~  pending results.



What's good and bad w/ blood pressure? 

Yrs, 

Not that paranoid at all  hOU

[nik at work]

100 + your age/80 is considered the norm (or was when I did bp) so yours is a bit raised. A 10 euro monitor might not be the most accurate....

[Houdini]

So I'm 20 points over the odds?

Just been retested again.  Similar figures. 

*pours more wine*

I'll take a 36 hrs off from booze and retest. 

[Houdini]

But tomorrow is Friday and a booze-free Friday is both unwanted & unlikely . . .   


How long is one supposed to go w/ out booze before testing ones pressure?

[Houdini]

And indeed, when David faced Goliath w/ nowt but a sling and a loincloth - did he give two flying fucks for his blood-pressure or that Palastinian hooch he'd been caning the night before? 

 

[lizzy]

The home monitors aren't that accurate. I wouldn't worry too much... Take it as an excuse to relax some more.

[nik at work]

Both your systolic and diastolic are raised, and by similar amounts. I don't know anything about how the machine works but could there be a error in measurement? Assuming all else is well in Houdini land and given that your ramblings have suggested that you follow a reasonably (if somewhat ethanol fueled) healthy active existance it is my professional opinion that the machine needs to see the doctor more than you.
Of course I'm not a professional so you might be as well talking to one (or at least borrowing a sphygmomanometer).

[Houdini]

*Reads the above*


*Shoots up some Horse*




Chills w/ his negroes . . .

(B-in-law is a Doc, will have him check me over fo sho)

[GCW]

So you're hypertensive at 155/94, listen to techno and guzzle alcohol constantly?
I'm surprised you haven't stroked out so far, especially as your age is against you.

I would suggest giving yourself a cold water enema and rechecking it.  If your blood pressure goes down, you need ice water up the jacksie four times a day.


Alternatively you could stop believing cheap-shit machines.  If you're worried see your GP equivalent.

[Paul B]

I got a cheap (almost free) bodyfat testing machine which gave different answers depending on whether you held it upside down or not!

[Houdini]

Ah . . .     Irony . . .    You've come to the right place.



Gentleman, I've noticed that when people are asked to give an honest account of their drug abuse they lie through their teeth.  I've been interested in drugs for years:  mostly reading about them; checking-out druggy art;  listening to Frank Zappa etc..    Along w/ c. 3g of coke in my life / c. 3g MDMA / approx. 60 E's / a few hundred mushrooms / three acid tabs / 1 mescaline tablet / 2 Ketamine pills - a few kilos of JPS / Dunhill & Golden Virginia tobacco.  And a few hundred grams of pot. 

That's what I've consumed.  Truthfully - I've never felt the need to deny it, it was fun.   Why some of my pals live in total denial about what they do and how much they drink is baffling to me.  So what if our bouldering heros used to train their nuts off on speed?

Fact - it's only in the last 6 months I've even liked booze.  Probably on 4 bottles of red wine a week now.  Used to be a bottle of Port every 4 or 5 days.

Anyway - this is sounding all very defensive (which it isn't intended to be) as I've enjoyed my drug decade hugely.  Just want to point out that from what I can gather by talking to and being around caners and even what I've  read on here - people consume quite a bit and have done for years.  I'm small fry.  Look at the figures again:  the big one is smoke.

I add this so that you can compare and contrast w/ your own experiences.

*reads again*

(Garrr!!  You cunts it does sound defensive!)

But!  I run 3 half marathons a fortnight.  I can power-skip for an hour.  Swim lengths for an hour.  And climb everyday for 3 months.

*notices decanter is empty*

*farts*

*curls nose*

*remembers there's a bottle of Austrian red in the cupboard*

*mumbles bitterly . . .*




 

[GCW]

No need to get defensive 
Blood pressure is just one risk factor for cardiovascular and cerebrovascular disease.  And a one off reading means squat.  Check it again tomorrow when you are relaxed, and then again over the weekend.  If all 3 readings are up see someone.
I don't smoke anymore, never drink alcohol and never took illicit substances.   

[Houdini]

Me too.


Everything I wrote above was a lie intended to smoke you riteous cunts out of your hidy holes. 

[GCW]

<cough> <choke>

Bastardos.

[Houdini]

Where's Captain Last- Word-Webbo when you need him?

[Houdini]

OK!



This Saturday, Fraudini will match the blood pressure monitor against her Doctor brother-in-law and his sphygmomanometer, and we'll see who can measure pressure more accurately.  Till then.

[GCW]

Let's just hope you can make it until then.

Do you get discounts on smaller coffins for shorties?

[nik at work]

If you're small enough you can fit in a childs coffin then there's no VAT to pay. Like shoes innit?

Probably...

[Houdini]

I've arranged to leave my body to that freak doc who does weird shit to your embalmed body w/ your tendons and muscles exposed.

I shall be preserved on a life size replica of Duel, Cuisiniere. 

[GCW]

I've arranged to leave my body to that freak doc who does weird shit to your embalmed body w/ your tendons and muscles exposed.

Bit like this guy?
HH Holmes was more famous.  Read this Houd, then check your BP....

[Houdini]

No.

Gunter von Hagens

[GCW]

Really?  Goodness me I didn't realise.  How silly of me.  I do feel so foolish now.   

[webbo]

Where's Captain Last- Word-Webbo when you need him?

he was busy doing research on whether a mixture of red and white wines raises your blood pressure more than tap dancing on a short persons grave.

we used to use those cuff b.p. machines at work.but because they are so crap they took them off us.so if you are prescribed cardiotoxic,psychotropic meds by our service you can't have any cardio problems till they agree whos gonna pay for the proper ones.

[Houdini]

They must be shit:   154 / 78  (61 bpm)

[webbo]

we used to use those cuff b.p. machines at work.but because they are so crap they took them off us.

mind i did once take someones b.p. who had a reading like yours i just thought the machine was fucked.as he was seeing his quack later that day i suggested he might want to get him to check it to be on the safe side.

guess what.

[Houdini]

Alas Fraudini has forgeooten (sp?  Is that Dutch?) to take the dumb 7 quid toy w/ her to her parents where she'll meet the Dr. in the family.

In all seriousness I've not had a full medical in 20 years so I'd be interested to know more about what we should be doing w/ ourselves to increase longevity / fitness etc.. 

Clearly drinking a bottle of wine every night or two won't be recommended.  Crazy that so many mates around my age still smoke and take drugs regularly.  Madness - I mean tripping's not that good . . .



Burroughs was 77 when he died, a lifelong junkie.  (Lee was his first pseudonym)  I'd like to add that the cornucopia of stimulants further back in this thread were consumed over 12 years - not in a weekend!


Now I get 139/83 (65 bpm)

[webbo]

i would see a medic if your worried.i'm a bit puzzled to why your h/r is so high given the amount of aerobic activity you do.mines only 58 and i've just run up 2 flights of stairs having gone round the building trying to find a sphig.
when i was cycling competitively it was 38/42 at rest.

[Houdini]

I'm curious too.   Feeling pulse now.  Regular 1 bp/sec.  (Differences in stature?)  I'm not worried just increasingly curious and interested in health issues.  Heart rate monitor must be purchased.  Watches any good?


I'm doing a reasonable amount of cardio now, but it hasn't always been that way.  Last half a year I've upped it a lot, but before that I wouldn't call it a vast amount, if much (just skipping and swimming).  Also it hasn't always been regular (rarely get opportunity or have the gas to climb/train when in work mode).

I've a feeling that comparing it to what you do is erroneous.  You've been obsessed & busy w/ sport for 30+ years, much of it cardio.  (Is that accurate?)

[webbo]

no my cardio is only the last 25 years .didn't start till my late 20s although i ain't done much since christmas,i rode my bike for the first time in 4 weeks on sunday.so its hardly olympic training.
what you describe i.e.running for 11/2 hours plus skipping for an hour should give a low rest pulse i would have thought around 40/50.try taking it first thing in a morning.
with the b.p. thing and your chemical past.i have had patients who had strokes in their 30s with similar drug use i.e.tobacco,cannabis,amphetamines,alcohol etc.the difference is they took no exercise and were on prescribed psychotropic meds.so you might just want to get a bit of an m.o.t.

[GCW]

Shit, Houd- despite your ice water enemas you're still doomed.  Bummer.

[Houdini]

Fucking great. . .


Best start work on my heir sharpish.

[Houdini]

#  Did manage to race this beastly toy to the Frau so she could get our Dr to test it but (quelle surprise!) he was ill, another time.

#  Was using it incorrectly (on the R wrist & not as you should on the L) & was testing wrong side of heart . . .
 
#  Tested myself a few mo's after waking & got:  119/79 (67 bpm).  Sounds better, except bpm . . . Had 1/2 bottle of red last night, perhaps it could be lower?


I put this down to having a well-fit frau 

[saltbeef]

ironically smoking lowers your blood pressure, but increases your cardiovascular risk. so don't it'll kill you. home bp monitors are rubbish. you're going running, this should help. go see your gp if you're worried. you need to be hypertensive on a number of successive occassions to be diagnosed with hypertension. i got "diagnosed" by a nurse as having hypertension, the fact i'd just run from the wrvs having had a strong coffee and had a job interview that morning probably didn't help. i repeated it on the ward later and it was on the low side. if you're worried see your gp, getting diagnosed over the internet is bullshit. we're talking science here.