[tomtom]

Re kids- from what I gather the crucial thing is living close to crags. Having said that I try to sit on the microwave when I can and keep my mobile in my pocket.

The ability to mentally picture Margaret Thatcher at important moments has the requisite effect too...

[battery]

Feel the need to throw a female perspective in to the whole children and climbing debate...

Firstly, for us as a family both parents are keen to get out and little one loves being outside so that makes life easier. Days out have been shorter during the winter but now it's warming up we're staying out longer.

The really interesting thing for me is that despite going through the physical changes of pregnancy and having a c section, I'm climbing better than ever! Many of the reasons discussed above apply but the big thing for me I think is my mental state - my ability to try hard, engage my core and trust my feet.

[Hoseyb]

I appear to be treading water adequately despite having 4 kids and marching into my forties .  I think this is down to always seeking lines rather than grades,  having lots of rock close by, and being fairly motivated.  It also helps that my three boys are monsters and their general wrangling provides me with more than adequate core and strength training

[petejh]

. Ondra's advice of 10 days of attempts then sack it off and come back later is good advice I think.

I don't. There wouldn't be many hard routes in Wales or the Uk if people stopped at ten days. It's easy for Ondra to say, he can climb 9b in 3.

Which bit of the come back later part..

[kingholmesy]

Perfectly possible to climb harder after having kids, if some or more of the following are true, the more the better:
- you don't leave having kids till you're relatively old Kids at 31 and 33
- you weren't some kind of child prodigy who peaked at 17 and then slid downhill. Check
- you climbed/trained/ate in a lackadaisical fashion before kids, and can be more focussed/methodical afterwards.  Check
- reasonably understanding other half, or at least not be a completely pussywhipped motherfucker.  Check
- not have a job that requires you work a ridiculous number of hours a week/evenings/weekends.  Hmm, bit of a fail.  Better than it used to be, so I do sometimes get out after work in the summer, but could be better.
- have got good local crags. Check
- go bouldering a lot.  Just about a pass, I boulder quite a lot, but less than when I lived near the Peak.
- be prepared to go out on your own a lot, often at unsociable times.  I was out on my own with a headtorch at 11am last night.
- have some mates in a similar boat, mutual motivation.  Check
- have absolutely no interest in participating in any other sports, especially cycling.  Check

8.5 is pretty encouraging - and I have certainly climbed my hardest since having kids.

However, there is also an uncomfortable amount of truth in TB's post.  I certainly feel guilty sometimes that I am spending too much time away from the family, and it's getting harder.  I have questioned whether it's worth it when I've walked out of the door with my 2 year old daughter saying "I don't want you to go climbing today Daddy".  Climbing keeps me sane though, and I find it hard to accept the idea of just pottering about occasionally and not climbing as hard as I want to.

[Paul B]

I have friends who are 'planning' to have kids, yet don't seem that interested as they're so focussed on their own ambitions. I wonder whether they should have them?! So, sorry if I'm lukewarm about the whole 'more psyched than I've ever been' since having kids vibe, as I personally don't see how it can be a positive thing.

And yet you seemed to be recommending the prospect to myself? I'm finding the reality of a dog to look after hard to stomach on certain days let alone children!

[SA Chris]

I think when the kids are either very young or old enough to join you, having relatively safe crags to take them to that don't involve either vertical grass, abseils, awkward downclimbing, long walks or deep cold sea nearby (ie not Aberdeenshire) are all positives.

[Muenchener]

I think when the kids are ... old enough to join you,

This an aspect not to forget. I've started my twelve year old's belay bunny / rope gun  training, although it might be a few years until it really pays off. At the moment he's really only motivated for indoor bouldering, but it's a start at least.

Papa Ondra seems to have been able to progress via use of his kids as rope guns / coaches; I imagine Hazel's dad could get himself dragged up anything he took a fancy to as well.

[Oldmanmatt]

I had kids late, number one came along when I was 35 and at first it spurred me to give up the the obsessive and very dangerous diving that I was into at the time (that and a very near miss at the six month pregnant mark). That initially impelled me into obsessive work/career/responsibility type stuff.

That made me fat, bored, depressed and dragged me further from my family than the thrill seeking ever did.

The imminent arrival of kid number 2, when number one reached an "interesting" age (3), led to some soul searching and quickly to abandoning career/security for dreamed of freedom and throwing myself back into climbing (after a ~10 year hiatus).

Being me, it quickly became obsessive (a familiar aspect of my life). Within months I was back climbing at my best, the level of my 20's. Almost exclusively bouldering (because I was flitting between Italy, Spain, Swiss, France, Greece and Turkey) and family got neglected again.

So, you all know about the cancer and the paradigm shift that brought about.

So, now I own a climbing wall, have four kids under 11, have got a bit fat again and reached my 45th year.

I find my personal ambitions have moderated. I spend far more time trying to make my kids life interesting. Biking, kayaking, snorkelling (diving soon!), climbing etc etc etc...

And, it's great.

I managed to get back into shape since xmas. Lost 8kg (6 to go) and got strong again, started climbing again (ish) but, I still have no need to find a project to obsess over. Possibly that might change. But frankly, I've already achieved a shitload in my life; I have no need to regret (well, a couple of expeditions that failed to yield our objective, but that's life).

So, for me, I now want to help my kids, and others, find their adventure. Spend time Guiding for them, instead of rich arseholes or fuckwit politicians. Build things for them to play/train on, instead of feeding some silverspooned wanker's ego.

I've always been impressed by the achievements of those who post here, I'm pretty sure that even the most punterish is operating on the 90th centile (and I see all sorts of climbers, every day). Seriously impressed that Shark is still butting heads with the Oak, for instance.

Those who manage to get better, despite kids, work, injury, age degeneration, battling bulges et al. Fucking hero's!


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[fatneck]

I have never known climbing with out kids! By the age of 21 I had two girls (one genetically mine and one not) and they were one of the main reasons I got into bouldering over trad (which was what the guys I got into climbing with wanted to do). I split up with their mum when the youngest was 2 and have been a weekend dad ever since. have a great relationship with both of them and never treated them any different.

I have never climbed hard but have always properly loved it!

I now have a 24 year old (engaged, assistant manager, lives with her fella, see her every other week on average) an 18 year old (doing A-Levels, Uni in September, see her quite often) and now married I have a step son of 7. He goes to his (bellend) dad every other weekend and as the missus climbs we (theoretically) have 3/4 days a month to get out. This suits me and neither my wife or I have any desire to have any more kids.

Eldest child never enjoyed climbing but enjoys getting out and joins is for walks etc, middle child climbs on occasion and the munchkin climbs fairly regularly (I say climbs, what I mean here is that he enjoys throwing himself off things). They are generally happy and make me proud, we put a lot of effort into ensuring we are always there for them and as Matt said, try and make life interesting!

Not sure how to link this to other people's experiences but I have always managed to fit fishing and climbing around family commitments, the key being to not be a selfish twat and to put the effort in with household chores and managing responsibilities properly....

[Fiend]

Yeah but has your fishing standard changed since kids?

[SA Chris]

Nah, he's still shit.

[Ti_pin_man]

I'm definitely at the punter end of bouldering but have three wonderful daughters, aged 11 and 2 and 2 (AKA my toxic twins).  It is, of course, all relative but my eldest got me into climbing in the first place and my grade aim when the twins arrived I got a couple of months after they were born. 

As others have said, it truly focusses your climbing so that when you get chance to go or to train you really just get on with it, no faffing around, your time is limited and you have purpose.  And every minute counts so if you plan properly the spare time you get is consumed by specific training. 

As for lack of sleep, remember pain is temporary.   

[webbo]

I had my daughter aged 38 and although I live no where near any climbing it didn't restrict things. I just had to be structured stick to certain days to climb and train, also having a home board was a godsend.
I stopped for a few years due to being injured and got back into cycle racing. I only started again because my daughter kept nagging me to take her to the wall. I would belay her up a few routes then boulder for 30 mins while she went off and made a nuisance of her self in the shop. and repeat till we'd had enough.
 She stopped at that age when it isn't cool to do stuff with your dad.
I now have a grandson aged 22 months and already I am being encouraged to take him climbing as soon as he's old enough.

[Doylo]

. Ondra's advice of 10 days of attempts then sack it off and come back later is good advice I think.

I don't. There wouldn't be many hard routes in Wales or the Uk if people stopped at ten days. It's easy for Ondra to say, he can climb 9b in 3.

Which bit of the come back later part..

Nah stupid idea. 20 days maybe..

[petejh]

Who to listen to: Moon and Ondra versus you and Shark... 

[Doylo]

I live in Wales so only listen to Pete Robins.

[Doylo]

There's a difference between 20 days and 8 years you know 

[shark]

Who to listen to: Moon and Ondra versus you and Shark... 

Visionaries are rarely appreciated in their time

[Doylo]

You tell him Shark

[Oldmanmatt]

Who to listen to: Moon and Ondra versus you and Shark... 

Visionaries are rarely appreciated in their time

23:02 by my watch.

Eh?

What'd ya say?

[tomtom]

Who to listen to: Moon and Ondra versus you and Shark... 

Visionaries are rarely appreciated in their time

But you've long since had your time...

[slackline]

Can you not just strap the baby to you when you're deadhanging and as the baby grows you also get stronger??

[slackline]

I do think folk who end up having kids - perhaps just letting it happen for the sake of a relationship - and then not being particularly ecstatic with their situation are either: a bit careless, a bit lacking in aspiration, a bit crazy, or a bit unlucky.

Or they could be considered to some extent selfless in helping someone they have already spent a significant proportion of their life with achieve something that they want rather than calling an end to the relationship and pursuing their own aspirations selfish interests.

[petejh]

Don't disagree with you about relationships.

There are countless other ways of being selfless without parenting a child however.