Harold is 95 and lives in a senior citizen home. Every night after
dinner, Harold goes to a secluded garden behind the center to sit and ponder is accomplishments and long life.
One evening, Mildred, age 87, wanders into the garden. They begin to
chat, and before they know it, several hours have passed. After a short lull
in their conversation, Harold turns to Mildred and asks,
"Do you know what I miss most of all?"
She asks, "What?"
"SEX!!" he replies.
Mildred exclaims, "Why you old fart, you couldn't get it up if I held a gun
to your head!"
"I know," Harold says, "but it would be nice if a woman could just hold it
for a while."
"Well, I can oblige," says Mildred, who unzips his trousers, removes his
manhood and proceeds to hold it. Afterward, they agree to meet secretly
each night in the garden where they would sit and talk and Mildred would
hold Harold's manhood.
Then, one night, Harold didn't show up at their usual meeting place. Alarmed, Mildred decided to find Harold and make sure he was O.K. She
walked around the senior citizen home where she found him sitting by the pool with another female resident, Ethel, who was holding Harold's manhood!
Furious, Mildred yelled, "You two-timing creep! What does Ethel have that I don't have?"
Old Harold smiled happily and replied, "Parkinson's".