[andy popp]

Despite having got two children to adulthood* I'm not sure I've learnt a single lesson I'd feel confident passing on to a new parent.


* whatever that means.

[SA Chris]

TTjnr is nearly 7 weeks old now...


......Anyway, these are just gripes/observations.. so far its all been pretty good. (though he only smiles for his mum... grr....)

Pretty much nailed it. Relentless is a good word for it. For the first 12 weeks or so it's pointless to try and establish routines, it just causes headaches and heartaches for all. If it cries stick a tit in its mouth. Eventually a routine will arise from the chaos. I always say expect the first 3 months to be total and continuous shit, and any times that aren't shit are  a bonus.

[nai]

The handing down thing only works with bikes, because daughter #2 (youngest (4of4)) won't wear girls clothes (even pinches either brothers underwear)

They fight over anything and everything, especially things that seem so small and petty

I find I have become quite shouty. It seems the only way to exert any kind of control

Sounds familiar, my youngest (now 7) is a complete tomboy, fiercely aggressive, massively determined, restless yet with a huge self-destruct tendency.  She'll only wear boys clothes, including pants.  Always being referred to as "that little boy".  Fortunately school are pretty lax about uniform, there's no way we'd get her into girls trousers let alone a skirt or dress.
We've given up on passing down from her elder sister, with (e.g.) coats and boots we now have to get them both to agree on before purchase, dead simple that.

She'll fight you over anything, make a suggestion and she'll disagree, just because.  Tell her it's black and watch her prove to you it's white.

Shouty seems to be default followed by quick explanations before her eyes glaze over and she loses concentration before going and doing the same thing again and again and again.

[dave]

Sounds like she'd make an amazing politician.

[SamT]

I find I have become quite shouty. It seems the only way to exert any kind of control

I too have become a bit 'shouty' over the years

This was making my giggle last night....

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/little-bastard-immune-to-good-parenting-20160309106969

[nai]

Sounds like she'd make an amazing politician.

Did I mention her tendency to blame someone/everyone else when it all goes tits up?
 

[tomtom]

Sounds like she'd make an amazing politician.

Did I mention her tendency to blame someone/everyone else when it all goes tits up?

Are we talking about offspring or partners here?

[tommytwotone]

1. Its relentless. Its never been too much, or impossible, or doing my head in (yet*) but it doesnt stop. It will not stop for a long time either I suspect! Relentless is the best word I can come up with.
2. There are no patterns. Everyone tries to link cause to effect, to come up with a reason why hes crying, or not sleeping. Its a new phase, or a new routine etc.. at this age, I think its all just pretty random (so far*)
3. The best thing pre-birth we bought was a changing table (its on top of a dresser). It fits in the toilet, and means we can get all the baby changing/cleaning/clothing shit in one place - plus its at a good height so the taller climber doesnt do his back in bending down to change him. Changing on the floor/a bed is crippling for me if I do it often.
4. Its looking like its becoming easy to get fat. For some fuckknowswhy reason our house now always seems to have cake/biscuits/chocolates.. I think its due to having steady streams of visitors who we all feel we should supply with cake/chocs etc.. and often they bring them with them. This coupled with a more 'indoor' lifestyle (due to baby not wanting to go running/cycling/climbing) means I seem to be regretfully putting on a couple of lbs. Plus mrsTT is breastfeeding the bairn, so she has a rapacious appetite - meaning any form of portion control has gone out of the window.

ANyway, these are just gripes/observations.. so far its all been pretty good. (though he only smiles for his mum... grr....)

:D

All pretty much in keeping my experience!


On the relentless thing, it just keeps going from what I've experienced. I read a good quote about parenthood (weirdly, I think Lauren Laverne) that it's "...simple, but not easy - just like rolling a huge boulder up a hill..."


There's always something to deal with, just that the "something" keeps changing. If it's not establishing sleeping patterns it's teething, then when that's done there's eating / drinking, then toddling / walking, then potty training...


On the back thing - keep looking after it. Both me and Fiona got terrible back trouble about 1 year-ish in, I think it's easy to underestimate the strain on your back of all the bending down, picking them up, carrying them about etc.


We bought one of these for carrying which has been really good, (especially compared with a Baby Bjorn,which I'd heard can be bad for a baby's hip development?!) - either way I just found it more comfortable / better for the back than a BB.


http://www.johnlewis.com/ergobaby-original-baby-carrier-natural-linen/p2589061

[SA Chris]

There's always something to deal with, just that the "something" keeps changing. If it's not establishing sleeping patterns it's teething, then when that's done there's eating / drinking, then toddling / walking, then potty training...

Someone once said to me the problems never go away, they just change over time.

[tomtom]

MrsTT's cousin in NYC works for Ergobaby... one is in the post

[Murph]

I have two kids, one almost three, one almost ten months. I am currently on pat leave for the next two months (three months in all). The best thing we ever bought was an out n about double buggy when youngest was three months. Since that age he has almost exclusively been pushed around in that.

What's so good about it?
1. It is robust, has big wheels and goes over rocks v well. In the last few days off I have taken it with the youngest to trackside, Curbar top quarry, eagle stone, froggatt edge downhill racer area, rubicon (all the way to litt on mill through the swamp that formed at the weekend), hairpin and blackwell dale. That's just been with the little guy - but the double is awesome because the pack goes in his sisters seat, I don't have to compromise on what to take and the pad goes on my back.
2. He sleeps in it no problem which helps with occupying myself while we go to these places.
3. Also taken it all the way round deferent and Bowden - about ten miles - which I think would be a struggle with a carrier.

We waited until we *needed* a double before getting it, but because of the multi purposeness of having that extra seat I would recommend one of these to anyone. If I had my time again I would not bother with a single - we got a maclaren gathering dust, and I would get the cheapest possible / second hand cast off cot-style buggy for a newborn and get him/her into one of these soon as poss.

Occasionally you get caught out with a style or other barrier so I'm a bit nervous exploring/wasting a day going somewhere new but suppose should man up on wet weather days and explore.

Anyway, wanted to pass this on.

http://www.kiddicare.com/p/Out_n_About_Nipper_V4_Double_Pushchair_Raven_Black.htm?product_id=549292&utm_source=pla&affiliate=KC-google-shopping&gclid=CNSlzdnC3M4CFRa3Gwoddv4Duw&gclsrc=aw.ds

[rich d]

I have two kids, one almost three, one almost ten months. I am currently on pat leave for the next two months (three months in all). The best thing we ever bought was an out n about double buggy when youngest was three months. Since that age he has almost exclusively been pushed around in that.

What's so good about it?
1. It is robust, has big wheels and goes over rocks v well. In the last few days off I have taken it with the youngest to trackside, Curbar top quarry, eagle stone, froggatt edge downhill racer area, rubicon (all the way to litt on mill through the swamp that formed at the weekend), hairpin and blackwell dale. That's just been with the little guy - but the double is awesome because the pack goes in his sisters seat, I don't have to compromise on what to take and the pad goes on my back.
2. He sleeps in it no problem which helps with occupying myself while we go to these places.
3. Also taken it all the way round deferent and Bowden - about ten miles - which I think would be a struggle with a carrier.

We waited until we *needed* a double before getting it, but because of the multi purposeness of having that extra seat I would recommend one of these to anyone. If I had my time again I would not bother with a single - we got a maclaren gathering dust, and I would get the cheapest possible / second hand cast off cot-style buggy for a newborn and get him/her into one of these soon as poss.

Occasionally you get caught out with a style or other barrier so I'm a bit nervous exploring/wasting a day going somewhere new but suppose should man up on wet weather days and explore.

Anyway, wanted to pass this on.

http://www.kiddicare.com/p/Out_n_About_Nipper_V4_Double_Pushchair_Raven_Black.htm?product_id=549292&utm_source=pla&affiliate=KC-google-shopping&gclid=CNSlzdnC3M4CFRa3Gwoddv4Duw&gclsrc=aw.ds

Mine are 10 and coming up to 8, best thing I ever bought was a larger beer fridge and some large wine glasses.
Rich

[Simon W]

Those Ergo carriers are great, just make sure you get one without a Velcro hip strap, pain in the arse when you've got your little one off to sleep only to wake them up with the sound of Velcro ripping apart! 

[nai]

Someone once said to me the problems never go away, they just change over time.

Just remember that Everything is just a phase, might be a good one or a bad one but it is just a phase and something else will be along to replace it soon.



Sent from my XT1068 using Tapatalk

[dave]

+1 to that.

[chris j]

Someone once said to me the problems never go away, they just change over time.

and get more expensive...

[SA Chris]

Well after having both in full time nursery care from approx 8 months to starting school, we are going to feel pretty well off come next September when the youngest starts school! I can't see it getting as bad as that again until they start Uni?

[Oldmanmatt]

Well after having both in full time nursery care from approx 8 months to starting school, we are going to feel pretty well off come next September when the youngest starts school! I can't see it getting as bad as that again until they start Uni?

Ha!

Wanna bet?



All posts either sarcastic, tongue-in-cheek or mildly mocking-in-a-friendly-way unless otherwise stated. Looking at you, here, Dense.

[battery]

If anyone is looking at carriers I would highly recommend getting in touch with a local sling library. Normally run by consultants who are trained and insured they can give you impartial advice on the best methods of carrying for you and your baby and make sure everyone is safe.

We love carrying and it has allowed us to get to lots of places a pushchair simply wouldn't be able to get (porth ysgo springs to mind!)

Ergo have a good reputation and seem to be really good carriers from what I've seen. Just please read this...

http://babyslingsafety.co.uk


Sent from my D5803 using Tapatalk

[lagerstarfish]

Well after having both in full time nursery care from approx 8 months to starting school, we are going to feel pretty well off come next September when the youngest starts school! I can't see it getting as bad as that again until they start Uni?

it made a huge difference to us when we didn't have to pay for a big chunk of child care - and free school meals for little kids was the icing on the cake (no packed lunch to make)

[Oldmanmatt]

The handing down thing only works with bikes, because daughter #2 (youngest (4of4)) won't wear girls clothes (even pinches either brothers underwear)

They fight over anything and everything, especially things that seem so small and petty

I find I have become quite shouty. It seems the only way to exert any kind of control

Sounds familiar, my youngest (now 7) is a complete tomboy, fiercely aggressive, massively determined, restless yet with a huge self-destruct tendency.  She'll only wear boys clothes, including pants.  Always being referred to as "that little boy".  Fortunately school are pretty lax about uniform, there's no way we'd get her into girls trousers let alone a skirt or dress.
We've given up on passing down from her elder sister, with (e.g.) coats and boots we now have to get them both to agree on before purchase, dead simple that.

She'll fight you over anything, make a suggestion and she'll disagree, just because.  Tell her it's black and watch her prove to you it's white.

Shouty seems to be default followed by quick explanations before her eyes glaze over and she loses concentration before going and doing the same thing again and again and again.

Yep, mine deafened half the climbers in Font because she couldn't reach a hold.
Then kicked her brother because he could.



 Then decided that this was suitable attire for a days Sport at Portland.



Yep. She stole her brother's boxers.

All posts either sarcastic, tongue-in-cheek or mildly mocking-in-a-friendly-way unless otherwise stated. Looking at you, here, Dense.

[nai]

she couldn't reach a hold.
Then kicked her brother because he could.

Definitely a tactic to remember next time I'm out with tomtom

By any chance is she excelling at school?

[Oldmanmatt]

she couldn't reach a hold.
Then kicked her brother because he could.

Definitely a tactic to remember next time I'm out with tomtom

By any chance is she excelling at school?

Yep, blew through the reading ladders and was free reading by the end of year one. Writes like a teenager too, cursive and all. Oddly, her three week older brother, writes like a spastic chicken, on acid, riding in an unsprung cart on a cobbled street, blindfold; but is "exceeding expectations" by a large margin in Maths.



All posts either sarcastic, tongue-in-cheek or mildly mocking-in-a-friendly-way unless otherwise stated. Looking at you, here, Dense. 

[nai]

Snap.  Kaitlin was on band zero until she noticed her friend picking up a level 3 when she started reading 3 books a night and didn't stop pushing until she ended reception on level 8 miles ahead of anyone else.  Then likewise free reading in Y1.  In Y2 they stuck her in a Y3 class to make up for a shortfall in numbers and she wasn't phased.  She's too rushed and hyper to write neatly but blows her older sister away at maths.  Teachers all love her, described as hard-working, polite, a pleasure to teach.  It's baffling but no doubt best this way round.

[tomtom]

she couldn't reach a hold.
Then kicked her brother because he could.

Definitely a tactic to remember next time I'm out with tomtom

What was that? I couldn't hear you up here...