[JamesD]

Thought this could make for an interesting thread.
So tell us, what is the worst idea that you've had, that seemed like a good idea, right up until after the moment you decided to execute it?

[SA Chris]

In broad terms that kind of falls into this; might like a read if you missed it as it's been dormant for a while.

http://ukbouldering.com/board/index.php/topic,5617.0.html

I once almost killed myself making a home made zipline, age 11ish.

[JamesD]

One of my classics:
Snowboarding whilst drunk, after a few breakfast lunch time jaegertees, at a bar which was rather too conveniently placed at the top of one of my favourite fast steep red runs (which apparently was only graded red because it wasn't quite long enough to be classified as a black), I thought it'd be great idea to hammer down it as fast as possible.
One sizable mogul, a few feet of air, and a nasty edge catch later...... I woke up dazed, bruised, with a nose full of blood and a nasty concussion.
It turns out you don't react as quickly to unexpected 30+mph take offs when pissed....who would have thought eh!

[SA Chris]

Have done similar after vistiing a "shack" in the woods and being given some fungus based snacks by a random there. Luckily I was wearing a helmet, but goggles needed replacing.

[Mike Tyson]

Sleeping with my ex whilst drunk whilst my current gf was 6 months pregnant, thus conceiving another child meaning I have ended up with 2 daughters who are only 6 months apart in age.

Beat that 

[slackline]

Sleeping with my ex whilst drunk whilst my current gf was 6 months pregnant, thus conceiving another child meaning I have ended up with 2 daughters who are only 6 months apart in age.

Beat that 

 

My worst mistake was probably sacking in a job that retrospectively I really liked and moving to Perth, Australia for what seemed like a dream job but was in reality rather   

[SA Chris]

Sleeping with my ex whilst drunk whilst my current gf was 6 months pregnant, thus conceiving another child meaning I have ended up with 2 daughters who are only 6 months apart in age.

Beat that 

Really? That's hard to beat, did you get binned because of it? So the Cumbian reputation is upheld!

[dobbin]

Lending Pat King my mountain bike

[Mike Tyson]

Really? That's hard to beat, did you get binned because of it? So the Cumbian reputation is upheld!

Tis true. Thankfully I still have my testicles connected to my body and a roof over my head. Took a lot of explaining and a lot of grovelling though. Alcohol is NOT my friend.

[andy popp]

As a child, bracing myself inside an empty oil drum and having mates roll it down a steep grassy hill. The folly became obvious after the first rotation but bailing was impossible.

Golt's effort is clearly unbeatable though.

[cofe]

having dessert first

[Fiend]

LOL @ Golt, good skillz.

Fatdoc's "Escape From Verdon" has to be there somewhere.

Ummm I don't think I have any?

[Bonjoy]

having dessert first

Can't go back to savory now?

[lagerstarfish]

Non life threatening instances

picking up a pretty blue jellyfish by the long stringy bit

getting on a chairlift with a French family just as the LSD started to take effect - are they talking to me? are they really talking in English? am I making any sense to them? am I speaking French or English? are they buying my act of pretending to be on the phone laughing hysterically at a very funny joke? thank fuck for goggles and my ability to board whilst tripping.

[slackline]

getting on a chairlift with a French family just as the LSD started to take effect - are they talking to me? are they really talking in English? am I making any sense to them? am I speaking French or English? are they buying my act of pretending to be on the phone laughing hysterically at a very funny joke? thank fuck for goggles and my ability to board whilst tripping.

 

Golt, maybe you should have been carrying a few of these in your wallet

[Aussiegav]

Tis true. Thankfully I still have my testicles connected to my body and a roof over my head. Took a lot of explaining and a lot of grovelling though. Alcohol is NOT my friend.

Or is it  that your knob and brain are closely entwinned???

Not the first man to blame the drink for some tiger behaviour.

   

[Mike Tyson]

Ultimatley I have nobody but myself to blame. At the end of the day I have 2 healthy kids, I pay my money to the CSA and see my other daughter every week. Things could have been a lot worse and I'm glad they aren't.

[SA Chris]

getting on a chairlift with a French family just as the LSD started to take effect - are they talking to me? are they really talking in English? am I making any sense to them? am I speaking French or English? are they buying my act of pretending to be on the phone laughing hysterically at a very funny joke? thank fuck for goggles and my ability to board whilst tripping.

That sounds worryingly familiar. Also on one of the last days of the season starting with Jaeger bombs at lunch after a full morning of powder riding and nothing to eat, drinking through the afternoon, and visiting more "shacks" going on to rugby tackling my (female) boss at the annual snow volleyball tournament, and then trying to chase down a fully grown bull moose on a mountain bike with a point and shoot camera in the dark round the field in front of where we lived. so I could get a photo.

[Jaspersharpe]

Oh God. I must have lots of these (not that I can compete with Golt......luckily).

First one off the top of my head (as I can see the scars from here). NYE 2001 I decided it would be a good idea to help my mate set some fireworks off outside the party we were at. It might have been but as it was just past midnight I was totally off my face on vodka, pills, coke and fuck knows what else. Hence, I picked up a large rocket, lit it and watched in amazement as the blue touch paper ignited and seconds later sparks started gushing from the back of it, all over my hand.

I recall my mate shouting "Jaz, let go!!" at least three times before I realised what was happening, let go and sent the rocket careering into the window of a house across the road. Fortunately, it didn't damage the window. Unfortunately I had severely burned the backs of all four fingers on my right hand.

Never one to leave a party early, I consulted a nurse who was there who said I should be ok if I kept it iced so I spent the rest of the night wandering about with my hand in a jug of iced water. It didn't hurt until the next day.

[Aussiegav]

i was on my wayto west coast ireland for a camping / surfing. i had got my board and tent etc on the train at Dublin. the train was not due to leave for another 90mins. so i followed the conductors advise and have a few pints of guiness at the platform bar and then he muttered something else i didn't quite catch.
after 3 pints and reading my book i looked up and saw my train moving away!!! 
i dropped my pint on the table and ran out after the train along the platform. it was slowly moving away and not heeding my pleas to stop.

i thought i should jump through the open window! that way i would not lose my board, tent wetsuit etc..
unfortunately i couldn't get through but luckily the cabin door was open so i ran faster up to it and jumped in about 4m away from the end of the platform.

my heart was pounding out of my chest, the guiness cousring through my viens and into my head.
i ran down to where my board was and sighed  / puffed with relief. i was feeling quietly impressed with my indiana jones effort.
'whoa, i didn't lose my gear" stoked!!!

little did i notice the train was empty except for 3 train workers fuming and standing over me.

what the fuck are you doing?????? Jumping on a moving train, you get yourself killed!!! said the once kind conductor who suggested i have a pint or two.

I said that i saw the train leaving and it had all my gear on it.

the conductor then replied, did n't you listen when i said that we were taking the train for cleaning before leaving and your stuff will be safe with us???

that must of been the bit i didn't quite hear.

when the train got back to the station after cleaning, the station master then stormed into the train and ripped me a new arse hole the size of ireland.


well i still think i'd do the same if i saw my gear leaving on a train without me .....

[Aussiegav]

Jasper, was that me who told you to leave it in water??

cant remember, but for some reason it does seem vaguely familiar

[Jaspersharpe]

No she was more attractive mate.

[fatboySlimfast]

In no particular order

At age of ten deciding to get a stuck bit of toast out of a toaster with a knife,....while it was still on!

On site soloing a HVS at Symonds yat before I had actually lead any HVS's (although soloing a route on Lliwedd at 6am in the morning without a guidebook or any idea what anything was came close but it panned out alright in the end!)

Coming home from clubbing and thinking the bath had blocked, deciding to then dismantle nearly the whole bath and surrounding area before coming 'too' .

[psychomansam]

Does believing in god count?

I did also wear a partly neoprene base layer down a 700m deep cave while on expedition in dachstein last summer. Severe arse chafage! But it was mainly a mistake because of the piss taking.
That was nothing compared to taking my SRT kit (rope gear+ harness) off on the same trip and leaving it somewhere "obvious". Suffice to say a 24 hour caving trip turned into a 42 hour trip

Hopefully that's a good couple of years worth of spackiness! Still never been rescued thank god, it's barely worth the mockery.

[Fultonius]

Boxing day last year, I was out drinking in Perth. When we went into the "club" (a loose term in Perth) it was starting to snow. We emerged 4 hours later, slightly worse for wear and there was now 4" of snow on the ground and the general chat was that the taxis were running about 3 hrs late and wouldn't take me back to my parents anyway as it's about 6 miles on country roads.

Ahaaa, I'll walk, he says... Not wanting to wake up the parents (I was 26, so should know better) I started the long walk home and bumped into an old school mate, who was going halfway. Anyway, once I got on to the quieter roads a few cars passed and I tried to thumb a lift. No luck. Two guys in their early 20s even took it upon themselves to shout at me out the window: "what the f**k are you doing walking in this weather, f**king idiot". Thanks, fvckers... 

When I got home, at about 5:30, all the doors were shut and I didn't have a key, so I curled up in the conservatory and shivered till the morning. 


I really should have realised that walking home is a terrible idea. I'd done it 2 times peviously, the first time someone else died on the same night, doing the same thing, somewhere else in Scotland and the second time I was absolutely blind drunk after being at a mate's funeral (he died in Glencoe, scrambling). My then girlfriend was on the phone, annoying me and apparently, as I don't remember, I got so annoyed I threw my phone in the field, never to be seen again. Just before that I nearly got knocked down by a fire engine. I was found by the polis in some old biddies garden in the next village and got delivered home. I remember telling the copper about the funeral, apparently this was enough to let me off with just a ticking off...   
 
Moral of the story. Stop drinking so much...