[andy_e]

Heheheh schwulen. Were you in Deutschland when that song entitled "Schwule Maedchen" came out a couple of years ago? Terrible song but the title made me laugh.

[Houdini]

Regretfully I know what your saying . . .

[dave]

ebay listings that say "L@@K" in the title.

[andy_e]

"Kewl"

[underground]

Spoilers on road cars aren't all bollocks - ok, most are just for fashion but some are there for aerodynamic/fuel consumption reasons and some, like on some 911s do actually provide some downforce at high speeds.

The one on my Avensis is there so I don't know I'm being followed by anything lower than a Lamborghini - one of their tractors that is:

[Houdini]

ISPs* that simply cannot handle the load or refuse to update/beef up their equipment so that we - the paying fucking customer - can surf as and when we want (yes - even weekends or between 6 & 7pm) w/ out the usual fucking crashing or snail-like progression.  Like now, actually!

Why is this still an issue?  Sort it out!


* or whoever is responsible.

[Jim]

Fraid you need a decent ISP, I've never had any trouble with mine.

Can I nominate shit sit starts for room 101. first one will be famous grouse, what a pile of log extension for a really good problem.
I presume its only down as a sit in the guide because that was how it was first done?

[underground]

ebay listings that say "L@@K" in the title.

and 'Here we have for sale'

of course we fucking do, unless you're giving it away.

[Paul B]

can we add patientline

[Houdini]

Fraid you need a decent ISP, I've never had any trouble with mine.

In plain English what does this mean?  Pay more for a more unpopular (by that expensive) ISP and hence experience less log-jams @ peak times?

[GCW]

And NHS Direct.  Utter jizz.

[Houdini]

All SDS's - give me a taller boulder and a stand up any day of the week.

[grumpycrumpy]

I'd like to nominate Jamie Oliver , not for just being a 'pig-faced spastic' (to quote the great Jerry Sadowitz) , who's usage of the phrase happy days has sullied my memories of a great tv programme ..... But for his crawling apology to Sainsburys after criticising them for their non-appearance on his show about chickens ..... A sucker of Satan's cock par excellence .....   

[dave]

I'd like to nominate Jamie Oliver, for ruiing everything he cooks by lacing it with parmesan.

[Bubba]

As a very amateur cook, i do find his recipe books pretty good though.

I believe he's also been described as a "fat-tongued mockney cunt" which made me laugh because his tongue does seem too big for his gob. The school dinners thing surely earns him a bit of waddage, no?

[Houdini]

Bubba - let us be candid:


I think he's a half-talented fat cunt who should fucking get Nordic Walking or go running w/ me.

He's a popular chef in Germany.  I attribute this to the meddlesome nature of the German chef who will all-the-time, everytime want to add just a smidgeon of this to counter that to compliment the other.  They add a world of ingredients to their food and still end up w/ the blandest tasting fuck in Europe. 

Oliver comes along and says:  Nah, fahk it n just tear up yer basil and these poor unfortunate German diners go:  Fickscheiß!  The man's a fucking wizard in the kitchen!


I know a fat over-eating/payed Kunt when I see one.  I'll be forwarding your proposal for entry to the Dark Lord Himself and have no doubts about His approval - seeing as He likes His flesh raw.


That fucking overweight cooking w/ fat obsessed heffer, what's her name?  The half-fit one?  The one that would be fuckable if she wasn't fat?  The one who snips up spring onions w/ scissors as she's too busy taking it up the ass  Nigella Lawson that's the one.

Fucking get in!  Trout!

[dave]

yeah his tongue-lip situation is quite hilarious. DId anyone ever see matt lucas's jamie oliver sketch on a late series episode of shooting stars? it was quite genius.

Shit, i've actually found it on Utube:



I'm quite torn on Oliver really. the parmesan thing aside you've got to respek the school dinners and chicken thing, but then again you see him in those sainsburys adverts and you know he woulnd't be seen dead eating any of it.

[Houdini]

Damn it Dave!

*swats the voice-of-reason like a fly*



Yes the school din-dins was a brave an admirable and hopeless move.  He's reprieved.

[Yossarian]

Jamie is very low on my Room 101 TV chef list...

Here's one I prepared earlier:

Anthony Worrall Thomson - an odious fellow if ever there was one
Gary Rhodes - that weird affected hyper dexterity thing really bugs me
Delia - utterly without style
James thingy from ready steady cook - Unemployed women's crumpet
Gordon Ramsay - A fine businessman, but needs taking down a peg or two
Tom Parker Bowles - Not on TV (yet) but I'd happily stick him on a BBQ
Sat Bains - has been on TV I think. Runs (in the words of yours truly) "a nest of egos masquerading as a restaurant".

[Houdini]

(Red mist rises)

What I meant to say is, Nigella (what a horrid name) Why must you talk in innuendo - all the time?  Just fucking cook!

[grumpycrumpy]

Nigella Lawson should go in just so she can be with her dad , who has got to be there ....

[dave]

That fucking overweight cooking w/ fat obsessed heffer, what's her name?  The half-fit one?  The one that would be fuckable if she wasn't fat?  The one who snips up spring onions w/ scissors as she's too busy taking it up the ass  Nigella Lawson that's the one.

Fucking get in!  Trout!

this ain't another jewish thing is it? 

But come on, you've got to admit if you look at this photo you must be getting mental images of chelsea buns, plaster's radios etc etc

[andy_e]

Yeah she's annoying, but she'd get it all night long....

[Bubba]

Despite the terrible name, Nigella is definitely hot

[dave]

I'm not convinced that photo is nigella though.