only joking (Read 392305 times)

GCW · March 09, 2012, 04:42:21 pm

Quote from: namnok on March 09, 2012, 04:25:43 pm

Cher Lloyd?

WTF? I live a sheltered life!

slackline · March 09, 2012, 04:56:55 pm

Be grateful on that particular front.

Jaspersharpe · March 15, 2012, 01:56:20 pm

Why did the hipster burn his mouth?

Because he drank his coffee before it was cool.

tomtom · March 15, 2012, 07:05:02 pm

Quote from: Jaspersharpe on March 15, 2012, 01:56:20 pm

Why did the hipster burn his mouth?

Because he drank his coffee before it was cool.

superb

aLICErOBERTSfANkLUB · April 04, 2012, 03:03:00 am

I had the misfortune to go into Homebase on Sunday.

It was full to the gunwhales with people panic buying hosepipes…

[Hello? Hello? Is this thing on?]

SA Chris · April 04, 2012, 02:16:08 pm

I battered a girl to death with a hardback book after she started taking the piss out of me.

The irony is it was To Kill a Mockingbird.

Nibile · April 07, 2012, 02:52:40 pm

Quote from: Jaspersharpe on March 15, 2012, 01:56:20 pm

Why did the hipster burn his mouth?

Because he drank his coffee before it was cool.

I'm quite intrigued by this one but I don't think I can get it right. could someone help me? the pun is because it could mean that he used to drink coffee before it became cool and trendy?
sorry to spoil it, but I get very curious when I don't understand something.

tomtom · April 07, 2012, 03:41:14 pm

Did you hear about the magic tractor?

It turned into a field.

butters · April 07, 2012, 04:02:47 pm

Quote from: Nibile on April 07, 2012, 02:52:40 pm

Quote from: Jaspersharpe on March 15, 2012, 01:56:20 pm
Why did the hipster burn his mouth?

Because he drank his coffee before it was cool.
I'm quite intrigued by this one but I don't think I can get it right. could someone help me? the pun is because it could mean that he used to drink coffee before it became cool and trendy?
sorry to spoil it, but I get very curious when I don't understand something.

Think temperature (of the coffee) here and how that works within the joke as opposed the association with hipsters and the like.

fried · April 07, 2012, 07:42:48 pm

I don't even understand the joke now

dave · April 09, 2012, 09:28:51 pm

Filled the escort up with diesel last night.

She's dead now.

Jaspersharpe · April 10, 2012, 09:26:45 am

Quote from: Nibile on April 07, 2012, 02:52:40 pm

Quote from: Jaspersharpe on March 15, 2012, 01:56:20 pm
Why did the hipster burn his mouth?

Because he drank his coffee before it was cool.
I'm quite intrigued by this one but I don't think I can get it right. could someone help me? the pun is because it could mean that he used to drink coffee before it became cool and trendy?
sorry to spoil it, but I get very curious when I don't understand something.

You're basically right Lore, the joke being that hipsters say they were into everything (bands, films, fashion) "before it was cool" i.e. before anyone else and the double meaning being that if you drank your coffee before it was cool (temp) you'd burn your mouth.

Fultonius · April 10, 2012, 09:29:50 am

Quote from: dave on April 09, 2012, 09:28:51 pm

Filled the escort up with diesel last night.

She's dead now.

Can't be that many escorts left these days.

Lorry drivers left them all in the ditch...

mrjonathanr · April 10, 2012, 11:18:51 am

Why do the French never eat two eggs for breakfast?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

Banana finger · April 13, 2012, 08:11:37 am

I have a thing for emo chicks............although its always imaginary when i root negative teens

My girlfriend's really stressed. She told me she missed a period last week......I don't know why she's so neurotic about grammar.

I hear you have to write a description below graphs.......but maybe thats just a legend.

(this ones not mine.....) Grammar. The difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.

lagerstarfish · May 07, 2012, 08:03:03 pm

Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control at Paris Charles de Gaulle airport.

"Nationality?" asks the immigration officer.

"German," she replies.

"Occupation?"

"No, just here for a few days."

slackline · May 14, 2012, 11:43:37 am

Politicians are like sperm. One in a million turn out to be an actual human being.

fatneck · May 17, 2012, 02:29:31 pm

Liverpool fans have always thought of Kenny Dalglish as one of their own, a feeling that will increase even more now he's unemployed...

tomtom · May 24, 2012, 12:24:52 am

Neil Armstrong once came into my butchers shop.
I said what can I get you
He said I'll have once small side of ham and one giant piece of rump rind.

twoshoes · May 24, 2012, 08:01:33 am

For Sale:

Medieval Village Accessories. Available while stocks last.

GraemeA · June 12, 2012, 02:06:15 pm

Shamelessly nicked from t'other channel but worth it I think.

After the jubilee concert Rolf Harris was asked by the queen "Are you that chap from the 70's who did 'Two Little Boys'?"

"No" he replied, "That was Gary Glitter".

tregiffian · June 25, 2012, 10:34:30 am

I just got a new computer; Font 8 is Times New Roman.

aLICErOBERTSfANkLUB · June 26, 2012, 04:53:29 pm

I used to just buy the cheapest brake pads I could for my car, but then someone told me I should get better ones.

Bad decision.

twoshoes · July 04, 2012, 08:46:19 am

Did you hear about the man who painted his wife with cheese?

He double glossed her.

grumpycrumpy · July 09, 2012, 07:40:57 am

Quote from: twoshoes on July 04, 2012, 08:46:19 am

Did you hear about the man who painted his wife with cheese?

He double glossed her.

That must have cheddar up ........