Parisella's Cave conditions reports (Read 593913 times)

Houdini · October 27, 2006, 07:21:55 pm

Quote from: Pantontino on October 27, 2006, 11:59:47 am

So what's it going to be, the Cave of Justice or the wall of dust and misery?

Font and Grit youth, Font & Grit!

As you know Pantontino from the innumerable rants you have been subjected to. My objections to the Cave are primarily aesthetic, but also the inability of the climber to top-out (which for me is very important). Though I readily admit to being utterly shit in the Cave it is only part of the reason for my disliking it with a passion... Bouldering and romance are not mutually exclusive...

unclesomebody · October 27, 2006, 11:45:29 pm

Quote from: dobbin on October 27, 2006, 06:34:08 pm

Quote from: unclesomebody on October 27, 2006, 12:17:58 pm
trying to redpoint left wall.

Are you trying it footless or something? you are far too strong to fail on this

i was only joking actually. but now you mention it... perhaps a footless variation would be possible!

Houdini · October 28, 2006, 10:04:19 am

But a friend of mine, Simon Cash, took 4 and 3/4 hours to complete Left Wall. Never weighted the rope once.

unclesomebody · October 28, 2006, 11:44:49 am

I've just got here and the place is a write off. There isn't a dry hold in sight!!! Must have been some early morning mist or something... But anyway, if you were thinking of coming today, don't. Waiting for the arrival of doyle who will hopefully be able to provide an alternative.

Doylo arrives, exits his car, shouting "don't tell me about the cave panton! I know about the cave, I knew it was going to be wet... for fucks sake"

Pantontino · October 28, 2006, 05:18:51 pm

Quote from: Pantontino on October 27, 2006, 11:59:47 am

When you see a still wind forecast, that's when you've got problems with dampness, and not just seepage lines.

I take it you checked the wind forecast? Schoolboy error if you didn't.

Doylo · October 28, 2006, 06:09:35 pm

Your right Si a wind might have sorted it as it was condensation more than seapage. Mind you it was windy on pil box and that was saturated too. Just a bad day on the orme i reckon! Went to Pantmwyn after and that was pretty wet too.

Houdini · October 28, 2006, 06:31:15 pm

Before I leave Britain permanently, I'm gonna blow up that fuckin' shithole!

Ru · October 30, 2006, 02:39:58 pm

What's it like at the moment - thinking about tomorrow?

Doylo · October 30, 2006, 04:48:25 pm

hey ru it was pretty good today, i'll be going again to climb on wed but will come along tomorrow if you come over, got nought else to do.

Doylo · October 30, 2006, 05:27:46 pm

I'm so honoured that my 1000th post on these forums is about the ormes.

unclesomebody · October 30, 2006, 06:06:23 pm

Just to add that this saturday the 4th of November there is a rally on the orme so the road will be closed to the public. You will be able to walk to the cave but no further. This means parking before the toll and walking up and over (not along the road). If you are interested in watching the rally action is starts at 8am. I know no more.

Houdini · October 30, 2006, 06:26:04 pm

Ode to The Cave

I never liked you: minging hole,
Stealer of friends to your toilet bowl,
Scummy rock with the crust of ages,
A plague upon you: Pit of Hades!
Rest-room for pervert, weirdo and freak,
You pull them in from as far as the Peak,
Yet why they climb here I've no idea,
Suspect it's because they must be queer...

(That's queer in the sense of odd/unusual. Not homosexual!)

fatneck · October 30, 2006, 06:53:15 pm

:bow:Consistantly excellent as usual Houds. Consider yourself wadded.

Tides are spot on for Angel Bay tomorrow...

Ru · October 30, 2006, 06:57:43 pm

Even if you really did mean 'queer' as in 'homosexual', putting 'queer' was still better, as 'homosexual' doesn't rhyme with 'idea'. Very good.

Monolith · October 30, 2006, 07:03:27 pm

Would be well up for a chunk of the Bay, but sadly working til 4. You off to it Fatneck?

fatneck · October 30, 2006, 07:20:23 pm

Feeling rough as fuck and left work early today but I reckon a good nights kip and a liberal dosing of some proprietry brands of cold 'n' flu shit in the morning should sort me enough for a bit of Bay action. You got a job?

Doylo · October 30, 2006, 08:19:42 pm

Houdini you'll be telling me Pil Box Wall is shit next

Houdini · October 30, 2006, 08:39:27 pm

Well, since neither you or I have climbed it, we're both in the dark. But it is slimestone, so there's a good chance that you are correct

Sorry sorry Horses for Courses... Viva la difference... You say Tomayto... Yadda yadda yadda...

Pantontino · October 30, 2006, 10:05:09 pm

Houdini, I despair, it must be all that chalk-dust and sweaty-rock-shoe-smell from the climbing wall sticking in your throat and making you grumpy.

You need some fresh seaside air...and some steep, hardcore limestone cranking. Don't you see Houdini, the cave is calling you, it is calling out your name. If you listen in quiet moments (might be a good idea to go outside into the car park if you're up at the climbing wall, it'll probably be too noisy inside) you will hear the faint echo of your name: H - o - u - d - i - n - i. You can fuss and cuss and protest all you like, but you know in your heart of hearts where your ineluctable destiny lies.

In the same way that one day you will realise how awesome Pavement were (CJD knew a good band when he heard it: Trigger Cut), one day you too will become a dedicated follower of the one true Cave of Justice, and that my friend is the truth (ruth).

Monolith · October 30, 2006, 11:13:11 pm

Quality summons to the cave of justice if ever I heard it Pantontino!

Yeah got a job in Music Zone selling Bonkers 5 to scallies. Although there was light at the end of the tunnel when some friendly bastard came in and asked 'Alright mate, you got any Aphex'.

Give him "some of that Aphex acid you cunt"! So I did.

Houdini · October 31, 2006, 02:39:48 am

That is a grotesque advert for the manufacturer of a certain maker of stuff and you should black the logo out immediately. Never stop exploiting!

At least it's I'm in front of some real rock. Not like that fossilised crud you lunatics climb in Llandudno. It's a fucking retirement village! You're doomed! You've forfeited form for difficulty. The lines are wank and artificial. It doesn't have one tenth of the grace of other artificial types such as slate or quarried grit. You know: rock made out of rock - not fish.

Where will it end?

Doylo · October 31, 2006, 10:14:55 am

Its good fun though Houdini, alright the rock isn't the best but the moves and the climbing is ace. Go and try Lou Ferrino and then come back and tell me its not good climbing.

Pantontino · October 31, 2006, 10:17:32 am

Is that better:

Where will it end? Perhaps when somebody links In Hell into one of the two unclimbed extensions to Lou Ferrino, or maybe into Trigger Cut with the Upper Cut finish (do the maths, we are talking big numbers!). Unless some globe trotting superstar pops by for a look, we are still a long way from that, and even if someone does clean up, by then the floor will have dropped to a lower level and even sicker links will be possible.

So in answer to your question: It never ends.

Bonjoy · October 31, 2006, 02:23:04 pm

Houdini · October 31, 2006, 05:36:47 pm

Well, what can I say? Bonjoy really should quit access and start working for Dreamworks.

For the record, those nostrils are 22mm across and will accept a clipper lighter in each. But really, those are the kind of pictures that should only see the light of day after I die... It's the chin-thing at the end which makes it for me.

You wait till I get a new digicam Herr Pantontino! (The fucker will rue the day!)

And for the record I'd rather date Stephem Malkmus than get in that cave!