UKBouldering.com

Bullying Personal Messages (Read 27681 times)

SA Chris

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 29594
  • Karma: +643/-12
    • http://groups.msn.com/ChrisClix
#25 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 12:26:09 pm
Whether it's regarded as bullying or abusive, there's no need. Just an underhanded way of taking a cheap shot without exposing yourself to other forum users seeing what you are doing.

Doylo

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 6694
  • Karma: +442/-7
#26 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 12:30:34 pm
It's a bit oversensitive sending a pm because you've been puntered

slackline

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 18863
  • Karma: +633/-26
    • Sheffield Boulder
#27 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 01:44:03 pm
It's a bit oversensitive sending a pm because you've been puntered

Unless you want to understand why you were puntered in the first place, particularly if you might consider changing your behaviour in the future.

Monolith

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Straight outta Cronton.
  • Posts: 3955
  • Karma: +218/-6
#28 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 02:12:30 pm
I hope people don't think it is unreasonable to receive unsolicited PMs from moderators?

I found Shark's recent approach to me to be a bit disconcerting.



shark

Offline
  • *****
  • Administrator
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 8789
  • Karma: +651/-18
  • insect overlord #1
#29 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 02:15:23 pm
That's meant to be our special secret   :(

tomtom

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 20328
  • Karma: +649/-11
#30 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 02:25:12 pm
He sent that to me too! Shark = busted.

rginns

Offline
  • ****
  • junky
  • Posts: 836
  • Karma: +40/-1
  • Holds innit
    • Strongholds
#31 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 03:41:28 pm
It's a bit oversensitive sending a pm because you've been puntered
:agree:

psychomansam

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 1179
  • Karma: +66/-11
#32 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 04:28:53 pm
 :agree: :popcorn:
Few things annoy me more than unsolicited PMs regarding forum posts or wad/puntering. Its a forum. If you can't discuss it publicly, don't bother.

I think it's more a case of, as me old mam would say,  "If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all"

Just to be clear I'm open to all offers of money, goods and services for free, am open to praise and adulation and am perfectly happy for you to grovel in gratitude for the endless wisdom/drivel I produce.

Else you can, as my better half would say, 'Fack off!'


slackline

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 18863
  • Karma: +633/-26
    • Sheffield Boulder
#33 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 04:43:41 pm
I consider forums be akin to a pub where you chat with people, some times its serious, others its shooting the shit.

At pubs Often you're out with a group who you know and some you might know better than others, whilst others in the pub you might not know at all.  If there is something interesting that some people are talking about I might go and join in the conversation.

However you (or at least I) don't sit in the pub shouting my at the top of my voice so that all can hear just because its a public house, people can have private conversations in public places the world over.  Sometimes I only want to talk to one or two people and that is where the Personal Messaging system has a role to play.  If that person doesn't want to talk then they can ignore me,  just as they can ignore a PM (or tell me to fuck off).

I don't see why would get annoyed ignoring something, its the most passive activity you can do.  :shrug:


lagerstarfish

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Weapon Of Mass
  • Posts: 8871
  • Karma: +827/-10
  • "There's no cure for being a c#nt"
#34 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 05:49:21 pm
sit in the pub shouting my at the top of my voice so that all can hear

you've been in a pub while slopesy has been there?

Adam Lincoln

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 4978
  • Karma: +111/-30
    • Flickr Page, Vimeo Videos and Blog
#35 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 06:51:17 pm
Just use the ignore feature, and you won't see his posts. I know quite a few people, including me, who already do. I mean what does he bring to the forum anyway? 

Just look how many times he has been puntered since he returned to the forum this week.

Johnny Brown

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 11586
  • Karma: +720/-22
#36 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 07:40:33 pm
If you want to make a pub analogy unsolicited PMs (from people I've barely met other than on forum threads) is a bit like someone following you into the bogs, cornering you and starting a rant. Unless its a moderator/ insect overlord in which case its more like being called to the bar for a word with the landlord, in which case fair enough, it's their pub.

mrjonathanr

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 5457
  • Karma: +249/-6
  • Getting fatter, not fitter.
#37 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 08:20:31 pm
Just use the ignore feature, and you won't see his posts.

Thanks, that's a feature I wasn't aware of.  It's like being able to magically mute the rambling drunk at the bar who wants to butt in at every inopportune moment.

Johnny Brown

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 11586
  • Karma: +720/-22
#38 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 19, 2014, 08:28:11 pm
Does it stop him from following you into the bogs too?

Sloper

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • fat and weak but with good footwork.
  • Posts: 5199
  • Karma: +130/-78
#39 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 20, 2014, 02:46:16 pm
More than happy to wind my neck in (no really, subject to caveats below), I just can't believe how thin some people's skins are; now if I'd sent the sort of message that Peter Andre sent me; i.e. giving me the alternative of a head butt or a punch then I'd understand the response, but the public running to teacher of the original post is in my view in poorer form than my pm which kicked off this kurfuffle.

Caveat, in my view adherents and exponents of socialism are morons.

Lund

Offline
  • ***
  • obsessive maniac
  • Posts: 442
  • Karma: +85/-12
#40 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 20, 2014, 03:59:06 pm
I'm sorry if I'm being over sensitive, but surely bullying is wrong? If someone feels intimidated, that's not a healthy place to be. This isn't me having a go at Sloper or anyone else, but personally I feel that UKB has been less friendly recently (as my recent "dicks" incident will support).

Play nicely or fuck off.

I think this place has always been a bit bullying.  I puntered someone with forum powers, and got a ban.  That's even worse than PM'ing isn't it?  I'm bigger than you, so I'm going to ignore my own policies and ban you?

I guess unless it's real (i.e. you believe they are real) threats of actual violence or material harm of some kind, it's just some kids internet bullying you innit.  Best defence is to not give a fuck.


cowboyhat

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 1505
  • Karma: +128/-5
#41 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 20, 2014, 06:11:27 pm

I think this place has always been a bit bullying.  I puntered someone with forum powers, and got a ban.


Did they explain why? What was the incident?

Bubba

Offline
  • *****
  • Global Moderator
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 15367
  • Karma: +286/-6
#42 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 20, 2014, 06:59:12 pm

I think this place has always been a bit bullying.  I puntered someone with forum powers, and got a ban.


Did they explain why? What was the incident?

Him to me: "Don't needlessly act like a cunt".

What else did you really expect as a result of such a comment?  If I said that to an admin on any other forum I wouldn't expect anything different. Most places you'd get a permanent ban. If you think a temporary ban is bullying then you must have a tough time out there on the big nasty internet. And I wasn't ignoring any policies, please read the caveat under the section marked "Ban Levels" in the ban/acceptable use policy.

Anyway, let's move on shall we? Isn't this whole topic just a troll? There's a "report to admin" link attached to every PM - surely it's better just to use that rather than have all this public drama.  I'm sorry, but I don't see a user sending a single pissy PM as bullying unless it's particularly personal and abusive.  If the OP reported the post to us then we'd be able to make a judgement on that - I suspect that none of us want the hassle of having to go looking in the database for the offending PM; personally it's something I've never done and have no wish to change that because I believe that PMs should remain private.

fatdoc

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 4093
  • Karma: +100/-8
  • old and fearful
    • http://www.pincheswall.co.uk
#43 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 20, 2014, 07:08:40 pm
As the last bastion of the Internet forum culture this delightful place is,  :agree:

Let's move on, I agree with the pub comparisons....


SA Chris

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 29594
  • Karma: +643/-12
    • http://groups.msn.com/ChrisClix
#44 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 20, 2014, 08:23:59 pm
Lock and log?

fatdoc

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 4093
  • Karma: +100/-8
  • old and fearful
    • http://www.pincheswall.co.uk
#45 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 20, 2014, 08:33:08 pm
Why not..

Lund

Offline
  • ***
  • obsessive maniac
  • Posts: 442
  • Karma: +85/-12
#46 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 20, 2014, 11:14:25 pm

I think this place has always been a bit bullying.  I puntered someone with forum powers, and got a ban.


Did they explain why? What was the incident?

Him to me: "Don't needlessly act like a cunt".

What else did you really expect as a result of such a comment?  If I said that to an admin on any other forum I wouldn't expect anything different. Most places you'd get a permanent ban. If you think a temporary ban is bullying then you must have a tough time out there on the big nasty internet. And I wasn't ignoring any policies, please read the caveat under the section marked "Ban Levels" in the ban/acceptable use policy.

Anyway, let's move on shall we? Isn't this whole topic just a troll? There's a "report to admin" link attached to every PM - surely it's better just to use that rather than have all this public drama.  I'm sorry, but I don't see a user sending a single pissy PM as bullying unless it's particularly personal and abusive.  If the OP reported the post to us then we'd be able to make a judgement on that - I suspect that none of us want the hassle of having to go looking in the database for the offending PM; personally it's something I've never done and have no wish to change that because I believe that PMs should remain private.

You took your ball away because you didn't like my comment.  I don't give a fuck.  Honestly, I could not give a shit.  You can dish it out all you want, I know you can't take it like a man.

Bubba

Offline
  • *****
  • Global Moderator
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 15367
  • Karma: +286/-6
#47 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 20, 2014, 11:25:17 pm
I don't give a fuck.  Honestly, I could not give a shit.
Yep...that's probably why you brought it up almost a year later :'(  :'(

You can dish it out all you want, I know you can't take it like a man.
Haha, what?!

dave

  • Guest
#48 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 20, 2014, 11:36:48 pm
Pub analogy again: you're in a pub and calling one of the bar staff a cunt. What do you expect to happen? You shut up and apologise or find yourself another boozer.

rginns

Offline
  • ****
  • junky
  • Posts: 836
  • Karma: +40/-1
  • Holds innit
    • Strongholds
#49 Re: Bullying Personal Messages
February 21, 2014, 12:56:45 am
please for the love of man someone log this!

 

SimplePortal 2.3.7 © 2008-2024, SimplePortal