[comPiler]

ISSUES
21 November 2010, 2:42 pm

Rant alert.

I've got mixed feelings about climbing and climbers as of late. I'm losing interest for most things related to climbing, and when I happen to read something, it pisses me off.

One of the things that makes me furious, is the hypocrisy that permeates the climbing environment, especially at the high levels of those who are the hot shots of the moment. When the shit hits the fan, the shit is often provided by climbers, but the fan is often provided by 8a.idiots.nu. I hate them, sad, poor people who try to cause a stir between climbers whenever they can, I can't think about sadder people.

The hypocrisy I talk about, often involves grading. I hate how those who declare to care the less about grades, in reality show their obsession about grades.

I hate the way they try to make grades universal, the way they try to get a general consensus: in this, they show the desire to incapsulate climbing into precise boundaries and classifications, and I hate them both.

In nature, there is nothing such a rock climb, or a boulder problem, or a marble statue: there is only rock, boulders, and marble. The climb, the problem and the statue are just human creations. So, there are no grades in themselves, there are only climbers, and each climber is an individual who can only experience one experience at a time, therefore, even inside each climber's experience, everything is subjective.

One thing that almost makes me want to get hold of an axe and start swinging it around, is their cry: "ohhh, my god, where will our sport go, with this foolish grading inflation?". Fucking idiots. They should thank their god or who the fuck they believe in, because they are talented and can go around and just climb the whole time. "ohhh, my god where is our fucking WORLD going?" should be the only question for each one of us.

In his book "I Promessi Sposi", Alessandro Manzoni uses the metaphor of two cocks that are tied together and are being brought to the market to be sold, killed and cooked, and still they fight and they hurt each other. This is what I see happening now: individuals that try to prevail on each other, despite having no future in the long run. Climbing is one of the most individualistic activities a man can perform. A man is always alone on the wall, even when roped up: I like to use the image of the tail gunner on the old IIWW bombers. Unluckily, this individualism, can team, sometimes, with selfishness and egotism. Fair enough. But for fucks sake, man up and take the courage to show your true nature.

You think you're the strongest? Well, do like Jerry and tell it to everyone. He had the balls and that's why he'll be always remembered as one of the great ones.

But not many ones want to show some meat, so they adopt this false modest attitude and they say: "ohh, I can't climb that grade that fast, so it must be alot easier". Fuck off. Man up and take the courage to say "I destroyed that shit, that's why it's soft".

I hate this yoga-driven, hugs and kisses, xmas feelings filled climbing.

You think that grade is soft? Who the fuck cares. You think an entire area is under-graded? Who the fuck cares. You are pissed because by calling a 7c 8b+ someone got a sponsorship? Who the fuck cares. Did he steal that from you? Who the fuck cares. Didn't he? Even better, who the fuck cares.

You can either: shut the fuck up and keep it to yourself (always the best idead); or take the courage to be honest.

One thing is for sure. If I were one of the strong ones, I'd be the baddest motherfucker around. I'd make kids cry and climbers go away. Then I'd crush the hardest thing around and fucking leave. Why? because it'd be fun.



Source: TOTOLORE

[chris05]

ISSUES
21 November 2010, 2:42 pm

I hate this yoga-driven, hugs and kisses, xmas feelings filled climbing.



Source: TOTOLORE

Excellent stuff, get it off your chest, cheered me up no end. By the way having never used 8a.nu couldn't you just boycott it and ignore the fuckers?

As someone once said "KEEP THE FUCKING FAITH".

[Nibile]

  fucking keep it!

[comPiler]

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS.
28 November 2010, 8:25 am

Am I a bad motherfucker? Maybe.

Am I a complete fool? Fo' sho'.

Why?

Because friday night I drove five hours on my own to go to Brione and try "Amber"; because saturday, midway in the valley, it was already -6°; because I wandered in the snow for two and half hours to find that little motherfucker of a problem; because the bottom of my trousers froze; because in putting on a shoe, my skin was so cold that I ripped a 2x2 cm hole in my right heel; and finally because I failed on the problem in the most spectacular way. To really give the idea of  how epically I failed, one single language is not enough: I should use all the four languages I know, to give you all a pale idea of my failure, but now don't have enough time. In a few weeks I wil start a Chinese language course, maybe a fifth language will help.

And you know what? I don't fucking care. It's been great.

I have learnt so much from this story, but now I don't want to tell anything more. I just want to glow in the blinding light of my failure.



Source: TOTOLORE

[JonI]

Reminds me of this, a bit cheesy, but I hope you'll forgive it...

[Nibile]

 
I'd like to fail like Mike.

[cheque]

in putting on a shoe, my skin was so cold that I ripped a 2x2 cm hole in my right heel

 

[Nibile]

IMG_0032 by Nibile, on Flickr
I just couldn't believe it when I heard it rip.

[Richie Crouch]

Ouch! I imagine it's going to hurt trying to get into those super tight solutions anytime in the next week 

[comPiler]

THE TRUE BEAST OF THE FAMILY
10 December 2010, 3:13 pm



Source: TOTOLORE

[comPiler]

IT'S ALL BEEN SAID AND DONE
24 December 2010, 2:33 pm

Today, with the rain hitting the windows and my body worked from yesterday's session at Area51, the new wall that opened at the sea, minutes away from Tartana in the summer, and Sox Club in the winter, seemed like a perfect day to say something worth reading here.

Then, I don't know why, some old reminiscence from my high school studies came to my mind, and I realized that the best thing to do is to simply point you at a couple of classics for you enjoy.

Fragment 58 from Alcmane, the so called "Nocturnal":

"They sleep, the    mountain crags and gullies,

headlands and brooks, and the whole race

of footed creatures and black earth pulls from

mountain beasts and the republic of bees,

and vast fish looming in hollows

of purple sea: they sleep,

too, birds with wide, cloud-tipped wings..."

Sappho, fragment 182:

"I have a beautiful child who looks like golden flowers, my darling Cleis, for whom I would not take all Lydia or lovely..."Alcaeus of Mytilene:

"Now we must get drunk and drink whether we want to or not. Myrsilus is dead."

It's all been said and done.



Source: TOTOLORE

[comPiler]

HAPPY NEW YEAR BEASTS!
31 December 2010, 4:19 pm

I will be brief. Today I went to one of the small bouldering areas at Amiata, and ticked the crag, bar one problem that at the end of the session was far too painful for my baby fingers, just used to the smoothness of my Beastmaker or the occasional plastic feelings. It's been so good. Despite the warm, humid climate, it's been very very good. Not for one single instant I desired to be somewhere else, or doing something else. This is me. I have so much to tell you my friends, but now there's only time to wish you all the best and only the best for 2011. You know me, you know who I mean: I miss you my friends, a whole fucking lot. It's time.

Source: TOTOLORE

[soapy]

HAPPY NEW YEAR BEASTS!
31 December 2010, 4:19 pm

I will be brief... It's time. Source: TOTOLORE

*bolts door

*takes phone off hook

*applies sealing wax to anus

[Nibile]

?

[comPiler]

4 January 2011, 10:20 am

It's so difficult to try and give the idea of the chaos that's in my mind. Once again I had a real emotional rollercoaster during the holidays, and once again I had the confirmation of how deeply and strongly climbing dominates my life. Plagued by bad weather, the last two weeks had been a struggle, that led me to drive more than one hour just to go to the gym, and this twice a week. Obsessed by the lack of other training facilities, when the gym was closed I simply couldn't help but mount back up my old fingerboard that I had at the sea years ago. Just a couple of sessions on it reminded me why the Beastmaker is the best fingerboard in the world.

Naturally, this tension didn't do any good to my relationship.

In my thoughts, I was growing weaker and weaker by the minute.

Then, moreover, I couldn't make up my mind about my Cresciano trip, that evolved from a 10 days stay, to a 5 days one, to 4, to 2, to nothing.

I got a phone call from work on Sunday night, and I am already back at school.

But...

There's always a "but".

But yesterday I went climbing, with the bluest sky ever seen and the hottest January sun. And it's been magic, to soak up all this beauty all alone as ever.

I fucking crushed.

KEEP THE FUCKING FAITH.



Source: TOTOLORE

[comPiler]

BUT...
4 January 2011, 10:20 am

It's so difficult to try and give the idea of the chaos that's in my mind. Once again I had a real emotional rollercoaster during the holidays, and once again I had the confirmation of how deeply and strongly climbing dominates my life. Plagued by bad weather, the last two weeks had been a struggle, that led me to drive more than one hour just to go to the gym, and this twice a week. Obsessed by the lack of other training facilities, when the gym was closed I simply couldn't help but mount back up my old fingerboard that I had at the sea years ago. Just a couple of sessions on it reminded me why the Beastmaker is the best fingerboard in the world.

Naturally, this tension didn't do any good to my relationship.

In my thoughts, I was growing weaker and weaker by the minute.

Then, moreover, I couldn't make up my mind about my Cresciano trip, that evolved from a 10 days stay, to a 5 days one, to 4, to 2, to nothing.

I got a phone call from work on Sunday night, and I am already back at school.

But...

There's always a "but".

But yesterday I went climbing, with the bluest sky ever seen and the hottest January sun. And it's been magic, to soak up all this beauty all alone as ever.

I fucking crushed.

KEEP THE FUCKING FAITH.



Source: TOTOLORE

[comPiler]

IMAGES AND REFLECTIONS
17 January 2011, 2:18 pm

These are the images: the first move and the dyno of "Mind the Gap Sitstart"; the lower moves of "Islero". Yesterday I retroflashed the first one but wasn't able to repeat the second. Good.

Now the reflections.

The thought of going to "Amber" on a single day trip, with an idea that wasn't just finding it, that is the idea of actually climbing the problem, was one of the fooliest thoughts I've ever had.

Simply, Font 8b is not my league. This doesn't mean that I won't climb that particular grade, it simply means that I have to try many, many different problems of that grade, until I find one that is particularly suited for me. The classic problem with my name on it. I just can't choose one problem because it's beautiful or because I won't need a spotter. I have to search and search.

I considered my "Amber Saga" an epic failure, in terms of the climbing itself, just because I didn't climb the problem. Reality is that it's just absolutely normal. But I am so stupid that I almost - almost - gave up on the idea of Font 8b, after that. It took my friend Filo's good sense to make me understand how much out of reality I was: he asked me "How many problems of that grade have you tried?" and I replied "One". He asked again "For how long?" and I replied "30 minutes". And it all became clear. I was out of reality, thinking that it was going to be possible that way. No, it will involve much more tears and toil than just driving 1000 kms and wandering in the snow for a few hours. That would have been simple.

So, the quest is on.

Then, the actual climbing. I feel good. I am still glowing in the bright light of triumph, that triumph that marked the beginning of the year, my glorious day at Chiesina. What a day. Perfect. There are not many days like that one in a year: the form, the conditions, the mind, the idea. I am glad I spent it there.

What I did in reality is not much. Just two moves. Naturellemont, these two small moves, just as the butterfly of the Chaos Theory, spun out enormous consequences.

Driving to the boulders, in that perfect light, I found myself wondering which was the best way to spend the day: after all, I had already done everything I wanted to, and the project that is still there, is far beyond my chances, for many reasons. Suddenly, clear as the sky, the idea appeared: I am going to repeat the roof direct, adding the first two moves (they had been skipped by the first ascensionist, who didn't like that crouched start). Boom.

The first ascent was made starting from the ramp, with three easy moves to the jug that marks the start of the difficulties. All subsequent ascents, to my knowledge, had been done starting from the jug itself, avoiding the greasy ramp. But the first two moves remained intact.

So, as you see, nothing special. Two "easy" moves into three easy moves. But it's not the moves, it's the form. In my mind, I took it back. Like a long lost son.

Finally, to make that day even more perfect, I conceived a new project.There's a hard line somewhere, and a possible different start. An eliminate for sure, given that I decided to ban a really good feature that would be perfect for the feet, but I don't care. The moves are great. The full problem will gain 5-6 moves, going up to 15-16 moves. Power endurance, innit? More power than endurance: yesterday I had my third session there, and I still haven't climbed the new start in a oner!!!

Sometimes I get a bit bored by all the difficulties of climbing: the spare time, the driving, the solitude. Now I know: a bored boulderer is a boulderer with no fantasy. There's always a new move to imagine.  



Source: TOTOLORE

[Nibile]

I think ComPiler lost me... 
http://totolore.blogspot.com/2011/01/last-sunday-while-driving-towards.html

[comPiler]

ON HOW TO SAVE A CLIMBING DAY AND TICK A TEN YEARS OLD PROJECT
29 January 2011, 5:30 pm

Last Sunday, while driving towards Amiata, at some point I started noticing snow at the side of the roads, then some more, then even some more. When I arrived closer, there was half a meter of snow blocking the roads. At that very moment I thought that they day before, when I had phoned a friend who lives there to get some first hand informations about the snow, and when he had told me that there was half a meter of snow blocking the roads, probably some crucial part of that communication must have gone lost.

A quick phone call to the restaurant in Sassofortino made me know that there wasn't snow there, and down went the gas pedal. To be honest, there was some snow on the boulders, making the top outs impossible, but in a small range of five minutes walking, I had plenty of problems to throw myself at. I had done them all already, but some mileage on moderate 7's is always welcome to save a climbing day. It was sunny and freezing, and also very beautiful.

After a while I decided to have a go at an old problem opened by Keith during his visit here many years ago: "Giorni Scuri". I had done it with Keith, and haven't tried it again ever since, so I was very happy to repeat it quickly. Memories invaded my mind, filling it with images of a long lost period of freedom and irresponsibility; everything has changed now, and my approach to bouldering is less naive, less spontaneous and somehow less punterish. Then Nicco and Cristiano arrived, they warmed up and we started climbing together, with spirits super high. Nicco managed to also repeat Keith's problem, and to my surprise I finally freed an old project, ten years old to be honest, that I had cleaned ages ago with a German friend of mine. Clearly that small boulder has a feeling for foreign climbers! This nasty sequence is the left hand start to "Giorni Scuri", and packs in a few strong moves, very open and with an abs-wrenching heel hook. This problem was named "Commandos Tigre" and I am very happy to have done it. Time passes, and I am still here, progressing.

Some pics from my phone: Sasso in the snow.

Nicco repeating "Giorni Scuri".



Source: TOTOLORE

[comPiler]

TALES FROM THE (NETHER) EDGE
10 February 2011, 2:51 pm



Typing from a couch in Sheffield, in the living room of someone you've met only hours ago for the first time in your life, gives much food for thoughts.

First of all: why is everyone here so kind? Do they want my money? I hope for them they don't 'cos I have none.

Looking back - a thing that comes natural to me - maybe I can find some answers to similar questions: what made me invite Tom and Rich down to Italy? Why did I open my house to Keith, to Marc (back in tha day, innit?) and to others in times long past? I don't know, but at the moment it seemed the right thing to do. Because it was the right thing to do. Because it made me feel good and happy. So I reckon it's just this that ties us together and make people let a stinky Italian climber into their houses.

I feel sorry.

I wish I was a better and stronger climber, to reward all these people with the best gift: hard and epic sends. Sadly I'm just an average punter, so no flash on "Brad Pit" for me. No tick yet, also. I haven't climbed "Low Rider" in a matter of tries, despite wanting to do it, and I haven't soloed any great, spectacular, stunning, jaw-dropping arete.

I can't payback what I'm receiving here. Because, bear it in mind, I am receiving a whole lotta love.

It's becoming hard to collect thoughts. I lie in bed at night - for 40 seconds before falling asleep for nine or ten hours straight - and I picture and feel the moves of the problems I want to do. Some of them, I want to do since the day I started. I found myself on top of "Zippy's Traverse" at Plantation, the other day, third try. I saw Rich at "Green Traverse" and he smiled at me, while a guy climbing on a nearby boulder said "Well done mate!". I live for these moments. They form part of a heritage of feelings that keeps me together. Because I shared them with others.

So, before becoming pedantic and redundant - another trademark of mine - I want to tell you how happy I am, despite being unable to fully understand what I'm doing here and living here. It'll take time. For the moment, I put everything I have into every single move, trying to give something back to those who are around me. I need them. I need company. I don't mind to drive, and walk, and climb, and walk back, and drive back on my own, if that's what I'm required to, for getting a climb done. But I am a social animal, and an animal tout court: I may hunt alone, but when I hunt with others I am happier and stronger.

So, while awaiting for amazing performances and tales, to entertain you all, for the moment you have to be satisfied with the one armers I pulled on "Brad Pit" starting hold.

That's my way of saying "Thank you, this is the best!".



Source: TOTOLORE

[SA Chris]

Very eloquent Nibs. Some people on here who type like they are barely sentient beings, and struggle even with capital letters, should take a lesson from the Italian.

[andy popp]

Seconded; really great post.

[duncan]

TALES FROM THE (NETHER) EDGE
First of all: why is everyone here so kind?

This post is a good illustration why.

[comPiler]

FOOD... FOR THOUGHTS?
23 February 2011, 1:44 pm



To be honest, I don't know where to start from; I don't know what to tell, I don't even know what I want to tell.

Not a single night has passed, in which I haven't fallen asleep reliving the feeling of the rock under my skin, the pressure of a hold, the addicting sensasion of sticking a move and feeling solid and in control. From the very first day, each night I had something to dream about, and every day brought more.

This has been a very successful trip for me. Of course it's no P-Rob ticklist, it's my ticklist, but I feel it's a good ticklist for an old fart.

I am sure it will take me more than just one post to go through the many, infinite moments that made this trip special.

One can see something and think it's beautiful; then he starts thinking that he wants to be closer to that beautiful thing; then he starts dreaming about that thing, and finally he wants to make that thing his thing also, at least for a brief moment. Few times in my life I experienced what I did experience when my right hand fell onto the good hold of "Brad Pit". Matching it, and exiting the problem, unlike many other times, I didn't feel like letting go my traditional almighty roar. This time, instead, I felt something surging inside my chest, that tightened my stomach and made my eyes wet. Commotion for a boulder problem? Apparently yes. I don't know why, but that's what happened. The previous day I wanted to quit climbing - seriously, I even phoned my girlfriend to tell her - the following day all the pressure was gone, and all I was having from the climbing was joy and fullfillment.

The key should be being able to find that same joy and that same fullfillment just in the simple act of climbing something, not a particular problem, but this is not possible. It would be like trying to fall in love with any girl. Doing something unexpected brings joy, one kind of joy that I also experienced in this trip, during my second week, when I climbed some problems that weren't in my dream list; but before, in the first week, all I wanted was to bear the pressure that I had put myself under: dreaming to climb some specific problems, and building a trip around these targets, was a great risk. Just as one day before I wanted to throw the proverbial towel, now I could be here, writing that the weather had been poor and stopped me from ticking my projects; or simply that I hadn't been good enough to climb them, therefore quitting.

I could be, but I am not. For some reason, that I don't know precisely, things worked out; they clicked. The pressure, released, morphed into some special fuel that propelled me up a few other problems, desired or simply found along the way.

I haven't tried everything I wanted, and obviously I haven't climbed everything I tried, but I feel accomplished.  

Everything has been on the razor edge of uncertainity: I was sure I could do certain moves or problems, while I was sure I was going to struggle on others, and at moments I have also been unsure about the result. As happened before, I am pondering what would have been my reactions, had I not climbed something that I felt worth. Again, looking back, all the many times that this has happened, that I have been confronted by failure, after the initial dismay and sadness, I have always worked my way back up to the erect position, and as soon as I had something back, I have always put it on the table again. The chase is better than the catch? No, at least not always. As I've said many times, it's a matter of dedication. It all becomes worthwile when it costs us time, effort, and dedication. I could have spent my holiday climbing dozens of easy problems, but I chose to play it differently, because that's like me. Have I been lucky? Yes and no. Lucky in having some days of good weather. But I don't remember one single move, in the problems I did, that I stuck because of luck. I stuck the moves because I am a motherfucker. Because I spent double digit minutes hanging from the Beastmaker alone in my living room; because I spent hours setting and trying my own problems in the gym; because I spent ages driving to the rocks, to maintain the "feel" for the real thing, the addiction to the move, the desire to finish a line. Because, after all, it's all just an enormous, continuous exercise of testing our will. "Warren Harding is not coming down" writes "Largo" in his book. I am not going down, and if I do, I'll cry, I'll swear, I'll find all the excuses I can, I'll blame everyone else, myself, and everything that I feel was against me. But then at some point I'll want to see again a man in me, and I'll go back up again.



Source: TOTOLORE

[Dr T]

FOOD... FOR THOUGHTS?
23 February 2011, 1:44 pm

Lore, you write about the emotions of the climbing life so eloquently (and in your second language no less) I am amazed no-one has offered you a by-line in a climbing publication. Until that day comes please keep sharing with those of us who cannot hope to write so truthfully and so well in any language...