[Obi-Wan is lost...]

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
(dead fit birds who cook delicious grub)

[SA Chris]

Meh, just going to follow in Nigella's footsteps.

[Fiend]

I wouldn't complain about her fishy smell.

Nigella is still the bizzle though. Proper ripe.

[GCW]

Obi-Wan, a chap that enjoys seconds:  Harry Potter's sloppy seconds.

[Obi-Wan is lost...]

Obi-Wan, a chap that enjoys seconds:  Harry Potter's sloppy seconds.

Don't understand you, isn't she married to the Cullum piano chap?

[GCW]

Old news about funny men fantasising about a minger.   

[Yossarian]

I barely made it through the opening credits without gagging, and I had to turn it off when I got to the bit about her ephemeral pedicures... I never thought I would say this, but I would rather spend 30 minutes listening to Cheryl Cole present a radio programme about Monster Munch.  There would at least be an honest integrity to that...

The only thing that would make me watch it again would be a guarantee that at some point she tries to bake a cake containing Jamie Cullum inside it (sitting at a piano) so that he might jump out and surprise an unsuspecting audience of fake friends, but because of the soporific effects of her ephemeral pedicure, she forgets to take it out of the oven, and he finally goes out singing (Round About Midnight?) in the depths of the borrowed Aga.

[soapy]

i concur, it was unwatchable

her vicodin dosage must be must be sky high, but then she is marrying the ivory tinkling midget

[magpie]

I have nothing to add, I just want an excuse to post this photo of her with her tiny child-man husband:


 

[Jaspersharpe]

Whenever anyone mentions the horrible little creature, I think of Brooker......

Cullum deserves special mention, because he's particularly odious - an oily, sickening worm-boy, presumably grown in a Petri dish specifically for appearances on middle-of-the-road chat shows like this. Swear to God, if I have to see this gurning little maggot clicking into faux reverie mode ever again - rising from his seat to jazz-slap the top of his piano wearing a fake-groove expression on his puggish little face - if I have to witness that ONE MORE TIME, I'm going to rise up myself and kill absolutely everybody in the world. Starting with him and ending with me. Cullum should be sealed inside a barrel and kicked into the ocean, not hailed as a genius on Saturday night TV. I hope they spend more time with Patrick Kielty than they do with him, which is saying something, because he's a man who exudes likability like a rock exudes blood.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/culture/2004/may/08/screenburn.charliebrooker

[cofe]

she clearly only eats crackerbread, not any of the stuff she supposedly cooks. i gagged at the trailer, let alone the actual programme.

i did manage to catch the re-run of sunday's wonders of the solar system though, having missed it on sunday. now that is ace television.

cullum shouldn't stand so far behind her. it makes him look small.

[lagerstarfish]

We saw her on The One Show last night. My 9 year old daughter soon commented that Sophie seemed "a bit silly".
I think she's all right apart from when she does that Lady Di style peeking through/under her fringe. If you're 6 foot tall you don't look up from under your fringe FFS; you look down your nose at all the short people in the world and smile condescendingly as they rant on about how everything is easier for tall people.

Sigh

[magpie]

cullum shouldn't stand so far behind her. it makes him look small.

I don't think it's the standing behind her that makes him look small. 

[SA Chris]

and smile condescendingly as they rant on about how everything is easier for tall people.

Like your husband trying to reach for the salt across the table from his highchair.

[lagerstarfish]

If she's married to hobbit-boy, why do they call her "Miss Dahl"?

[SA Chris]

'cause she still cooks a great lentil curry?

[Jaspersharpe]

Tha Serfy las neet man wuz just leik Nigella! Flortin wi the camera an aall, an she nevah even cooked dahl aw curree aw owt!

[Somebody's Fool]

Whenever anyone mentions the horrible little creature, I think of Brooker......

Cullum deserves special mention, because he's particularly odious - an oily, sickening worm-boy, presumably grown in a Petri dish specifically for appearances on middle-of-the-road chat shows like this. Swear to God, if I have to see this gurning little maggot clicking into faux reverie mode ever again - rising from his seat to jazz-slap the top of his piano wearing a fake-groove expression on his puggish little face - if I have to witness that ONE MORE TIME, I'm going to rise up myself and kill absolutely everybody in the world. Starting with him and ending with me. Cullum should be sealed inside a barrel and kicked into the ocean, not hailed as a genius on Saturday night TV. I hope they spend more time with Patrick Kielty than they do with him, which is saying something, because he's a man who exudes likability like a rock exudes blood.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/culture/2004/may/08/screenburn.charliebrooker

I miss the days when Brooker was practically anonymous and could properly let rip.

[Jaspersharpe]

Yeah that Parky one's still my all time favourite I think.

[grumpycrumpy]

I have nothing to add, I just want an excuse to post this photo of her with her tiny child-man husband:


 

Shurely photoshopped ...... Not sure whether it's to make him look taller , but there's definitely not quite kosher about this shot .....

A much better food programme was on on BBC 4 at 9.00 pm last night ..... They slaughtered pigs and baked bread and went picking herbs in Alpine meadows ..... Luvverly ......
 

[Jaspersharpe]

[SA Chris]

She just turned around to look into his eyes, and missed by about a foot.

[Yossarian]

I don't actually mind her.  I just think the concept of that show and the ridiculous acting up consipred to create nothing less than facile, conceited nonsense.  They could've achieved the same effect if they had given Jamie Oliver a sex change (and a bit of lip reduction), sent him to a Swiss finishing school with a big box of crayons, instigated a mild eating disorder, and then while he was recovering ask him to make cakes and pretend he wanted to eat them...

And of course, it had to be a Dirty Martini she made.  (I didn't see that bit BTW) No other kind would do...

I expect in Nigella's next series they will be an explanation of the Filthy Martini, in which a still-sweating Mrs Lawson throws some gin and a g-string into a pint glass, extracts a glossily-lubed dildo from her loins and uses it to stir the drink before tipping it down her throat and making a gag about swallowing.

[magpie]

Shurely photoshopped

They're all like that though. 

[Bubba]

I think she's all right apart from when she does that Lady Di style peeking through/under her fringe.

When she's just being straight up then she's fine, but all her little-girl cutesy mannerisms are really annoying. I saw her on Jonathan Ross a little while back and she was so annoying I had to leave the room.

[magpie]

What annoys me is the fact that she made a name for herself as a plus sized model, and looked great doing so, but now she looks like every other bobble head in the media while banging on about how much she loves food, just clearly not enough to keep her off the diet, eh? 

[slackline]

I saw her on Jonathan Ross a little while back and she was so annoying I had to leave the room.

Should have just turned the TV off, then you wouldn't have had to have endured that twat Ross too  (not always easy when partners want to watch things though)

[Jaspersharpe]

Slackers sometimes you sound like........

 

[slackline]

Slackers sometimes you sound like........

 

 

[Jaspersharpe]

Of course, he's your hero. I should have realised!

[Jim]

you lot really are a bunch of heat magazine reading losers

[Fiend]

What annoys me is the fact that she made a name for herself as a plus sized model, and looked great doing so, but now she looks like every other bobble head in the media while banging on about how much she loves food, just clearly not enough to keep her off the diet, eh? 

Good point well made.

The whole concept of "plus size model" is incredibly offensive, although not nearly as offensive as modelling/fashion itself. God there is some utter fucking shite in the world. I might go bouldering or something soon.

[Drewski Rootbitch]

I can't help imagining them in bed,
laid nose to nose,
whispering all lovey dovey....
and his little legs kicking her knees.

[soapy]

she probably just ties some sashcord around his ankles and pops him up there

[Obi-Wan is lost...]

Jesus you lot are a miserable bunch. True, I used to think she was a bit funny looking, but on this she looks really cute, and yes, she looks a lot better for losing a few pounds (so shoot me). For another thing I can't remember the last time there was a peak time prog on TV with a sound track worth listening too. Some of the recipes didn't look half bad either and she's a lot better looking than Jamie Fucking Oliver. I spent the entire programme feeling hungry and with a grin on my face.  Oh yeah, and she didn't once mention her uber-annoying ivory-tinkling micro-husband.

[butters]

The whole concept of "plus size model" is incredibly offensive, although not nearly as offensive as modelling/fashion itself. God there is some utter fucking shite in the world. I might go bouldering or something soon.

Yep, can see exactly where you are coming from there... 

[slackline]

 

[Fiend]

Bastards. Just you wait. Sharma will be modelling a bright camo hat on his next 9b and then you'll all be sorry.

[Jim]

i'd give her one in both bums, front & back

[Paul B]

I think she's all right apart from when she does that Lady Di style peeking through/under her fringe.

When she's just being straight up then she's fine, but all her little-girl cutesy mannerisms are really annoying. I saw her on Jonathan Ross a little while back and she was so annoying I had to leave the room.

Well I stuck with this series until now (more as its set to record and I haven't got around  to deleting it, but this weeks was a step too far. Bubba hit the nail on the head; if she could cut out all of the 'away with the faries' girly bullshit It'd be quite good.

Some of it is just plain annoying; "Oh how I love flying" "Oh how I love the plane food", of course you do, its like fine dining up there in front. Try it in the back with the cattle.

Has anyone else noticed that for someone presenting a cooking show, she's got crap knife skills?

[lagerstarfish]

Has anyone else noticed that for someone presenting a cooking show, she's got crap knife skills?

I'd still let her handle my chopper




*gets coat


*leaves looking sheepish

[Johnny Brown]

I can't imagine steady hands are helped my the knowledge that Jim has designs on both your bums.

[slackline]

Has anyone else noticed that for someone presenting a cooking show, she's got crap knife skills?

  Clocked that this week and thought "She doesn't have a fucking clue", it would take ages for her to prepare food at the rate at which she chops.

[Jaspersharpe]

Whoah! It appears the picture of Mr Logic I linked to above has been 4channed.

[slackline]

 

[Obi-Wan is lost...]

Er, I think a Mod may need to NSFW/Delete that.