UKBouldering.com

gooDADvice (Read 240034 times)

SA Chris

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 29221
  • Karma: +630/-11
    • http://groups.msn.com/ChrisClix
gooDADvice
December 31, 2009, 03:32:53 pm
As a newbie father, appreciate any tips that the gnarled veterans out there have.

Was given the feed until sleepy, then change nappy which perks him up a bit, then feed again while perky tip yesterday, which is devistatingly efffective in getting him to kip for a couple of hours at a time.

Also any good books or websites to read?

Thanks

Palomides

Offline
  • ****
  • forum abuser
  • Posts: 732
  • Karma: +33/-1
#1 Re: gooDADvice
December 31, 2009, 03:54:26 pm
Due to a regrettable lack of standardisation in the manufacturing process for children, every one of them is different.

So something like 90% of the advice you'll get will not be relevant to you and yours, or just plain won't work. You can't :rtfm:, but it doesn't hurt to be informed as long as you bear that in mind.

Just try and keep them clean(ish), give them a good diet and keep them happy. You'll learn fast. Just remember that kids are tougher than you think, but they grow up really fast - relax your plans and ideas, because I really doubt that anyone gets old and says "I wish I'd spent less time with my children".

PS It gets better every year - especially when the nappies are gone!

Andy F

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 1985
  • Karma: +129/-13
  • Ex-ex-climber
#2 Re: gooDADvice
December 31, 2009, 03:56:49 pm
For a good long sleep at night, give them a feed (say at 10pm), let them sleep for an hour or so then feed 'em again at around 11ish. The second feed should see them through the night, or most of it.

Canary M Burns

Offline
  • *
  • newbie
  • Posts: 19
  • Karma: +1/-0
  • Shatner's Bassoon Engineer
#3 Re: gooDADvice
December 31, 2009, 03:59:52 pm
Persist with winding, a few seconds back rubbing isn't enough. Make sure you get as much as you can up. Ours wouldn't settle sometimes and from what i remember it was always wind.

Congrats by the way, you've joined a club that is 99% bliss, amazing & 1% "I just need some friggin sleep"

Oh, and if you've got a couple of weeks paternaty, grab sleep when they're asleep that way you can function a silly o'clock

Joepicalli

Offline
  • ****
  • forum abuser
  • Posts: 721
  • Karma: +32/-3
#4 Re: gooDADvice
December 31, 2009, 04:11:46 pm
Not sleeping? Walk with them held close to you (some combination of the heartbeat and the pace I believe is why it works), I found long even strides worked, back to sleep pretty quick, it also made me feel very close to him in one of those wooly, inexplicable ways. Singing Nirvana's "Come as You Are" also worked - sometimes.

webbo

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 5028
  • Karma: +141/-13
#5 Re: gooDADvice
December 31, 2009, 04:16:49 pm
i agree with close hugging thing.when my daughter was a toddler she would fight going to sleep.so hugging her so she couldn't wriggle but not quite suffocating her,she would eventually go to sleep.
mind that was easier than trying to get sleep while shes still out raving with her mates.

Bubba

Offline
  • *****
  • Global Moderator
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 15367
  • Karma: +286/-6
#6 Re: gooDADvice
December 31, 2009, 04:43:22 pm

Start roughening up his little knees and elbows now, ready for his first chimneys in a few years :)

mrjonathanr

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 5377
  • Karma: +242/-6
  • Getting fatter, not fitter.
#7 Re: gooDADvice
December 31, 2009, 06:05:39 pm
Palomides is right about variation although I quite liked the manufacturing process myself. There don't seem to be any hard-and-fast rules that I can discern after 4 months at it, and babies change all the time, but this works a treat for us:
http://www.littlesleepyhead.co.uk/?gclid=CM2uovmfgZ8CFUoB4wodj3h4JA
Seriously , it's a miracle.
Tracks include: Tumble dryer/ Washing Machine/ Vacuum cleaner and a handful of others.
More temporary might be the vacuum cleaner but it's likely to be very loud at night. Try over-the-shoulder and gentle pacing next to the cooker-hood on full tilt too.
Other things to consider as Mr Burns sugggest include winding properly (it's an art-form) but be aware it's possible a child won't want to burp at times, and swaddling: some love it/some don't. He'll let you know.

fatdoc

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 4093
  • Karma: +100/-8
  • old and fearful
    • http://www.pincheswall.co.uk
#8 Re: gooDADvice
December 31, 2009, 08:32:43 pm
Christ.

Great thread, as I'm half cut I'll keep my opinion for another day. It won't be any better than above, as the disperate nature of the whole process is well explained above.
I have 4 critters. It's ace.

I as a result am having 2 bottles of fizzy while the kids are up with the missus, when critters crash so shall we. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Jaspersharpe

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • 1B punter
  • Posts: 12344
  • Karma: +600/-20
  • Allez Oleeeve!
#9 Re: gooDADvice
December 31, 2009, 11:07:45 pm
Agree with all of the above and also remember that they only get more entertaining. For the first few months you're just keeping something you love more than anything alive. Then you start getting a return on your investment.

My boy is just 3 and the look on his face last night when I pointed out the big wheel as we walked down Division St on our way to go on it made my Christmas / life so far.

It's the best thing ever.

SA Chris

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 29221
  • Karma: +630/-11
    • http://groups.msn.com/ChrisClix
#10 Re: gooDADvice
January 01, 2010, 07:52:00 am
Persist with winding, a few seconds back rubbing isn't enough.

Any recommended method? I am trying the sitting on the knee and leaning froward method, which is sometimes effective.

Took him for a short walk yesterday afternoon, he got to see the best things in life - waves, snow, sunshine and rock all in one fell swoop. Mostly slept through it though! Conditions in the hills are fantastic for climbing and skiing and there are waves to be had, but there is nowhere i would rather be than with him right now. I'm on leave until the 19th or something, so no rush to get back to work.

rich d

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 1313
  • Karma: +80/-1
#11 Re: gooDADvice
January 01, 2010, 08:40:38 am
My girls are three and a half and one, it gets easier and more rewarding all the time. For the first few weeks just go with the flow, treasure it - and remember you never catch back up on the sleep. It is amazing and it get's more amazing everyday. Both of mine were pretty much sleeping through by 12 weeks - mainly due to luck.but can't remember either of them really sleeping before then.my only tip is to make sure you both catch little naps when your little one is asleep.

GCW

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • No longer a
  • Posts: 8172
  • Karma: +364/-38
#12 Re: gooDADvice
January 01, 2010, 10:02:56 am
I'd suggest a routine is helpful too, not necessarily to the specificity of whatsername, but at least doing the same things roughly the same each time.  It seemed to work for our two, although they are going through a phase of waking at the moment which I'm sure will pass soon.

Winding- we used a combo of back patting/rubbing and having them sat up and rotating them gently.  Hold with hand under chin (but allow some room for breathing) then turn this hand in gentle circles.  No SCIENCE but it works OK, although it may just be the time they spend sat up that does the trick.

fatdoc

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 4093
  • Karma: +100/-8
  • old and fearful
    • http://www.pincheswall.co.uk
#13 Re: gooDADvice
January 01, 2010, 10:43:24 am
a routinue... but not that weird woman's mantra. food / bath / bed. same time...

i agree with jasper, they take 9 months in and 9 months out to become human.

as soon as: long walks out in buggy. even better send the missus out to run with the buggy.

12 weeks and sleeping through  :(

12 months.. if I'm lucky...  :boohoo:

for winding.. over the shoulder and then walk about...


lagerstarfish

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Weapon Of Mass
  • Posts: 8810
  • Karma: +812/-10
  • "There's no cure for being a c#nt"
#14 Re: gooDADvice
January 01, 2010, 11:08:45 am
Books:

"What every parent needs to know"
by Margret Sunderland - either states the bleedin obvious or is a total revelation depending on who reads it

"The contented little baby book" by Gina Ford - 9 years ago I had no idea how to look after a baby, no one nearby who knew and a baby that didn't sleep for much more than an hour at a time. I followed the feeding and sleeping routines in this book and we were sorted. If you end up at the point where you just want to be told what to do coz your too tired to make your own decisions then this is a fine book to get. This time round I've ended up with a baby that is happy all the time and sleeps very well at night, so we haven't had to resort to Ms Ford's dictations.

Burping beta:

As mentioned above; it can take ages for a burp to come up, but it's worth persisting coz the baby will feel much better. My technique involves leaning the baby slightly forward, their chest resting on my palm with my thumb under one arm pit and my middle finger (and the next 2 fingers) under the other, index finger can be used to steady the head. The baby's bum resting on my thigh. Gently rub their back or pat gently until a burp comes out

found a pic on 'tinterweb - like this


Feeding beta:

you can trick them into getting a bit more milk inside by moving their jaw up and down when they stop - just gently nudge it in a rhythm similar to their own sucking rate. Even if they fall asleep this can stimulate them into getting a bigger feed - which means more sleep :thumbsup:
« Last Edit: January 01, 2010, 11:14:53 am by lagerstarfish »

DaveC

Offline
  • ****
  • junky
  • Posts: 786
  • Karma: +26/-1
  • Old skool...with emphasis on the "old".
#15 Re: gooDADvice
January 01, 2010, 11:35:44 am
I can only guess that the proliferation of baby talk on this forum is causing googleads to start showing links like this one!!
http://www.clubnutricia.com.au/forums_and_friends?gclid=CJmC1e2Lg58CFQwwpAodtiqTzA
 ::)

DaveC

Offline
  • ****
  • junky
  • Posts: 786
  • Karma: +26/-1
  • Old skool...with emphasis on the "old".
#16 Re: gooDADvice
January 01, 2010, 11:38:56 am
I would like to point out that I am in no way trying to tell you to talk about babies on other forums...honestly!  :ang:

Nim

Offline
  • *
  • regular
  • Posts: 38
  • Karma: +1/-0
#17 Re: gooDADvice
January 01, 2010, 11:45:12 am
For wind, get some Infacol - it really helps.   Position-wise, we would put Squeak over our shoulders and pat his back until some wind came out, we would then pat his bum until a bit more came up.  Patting from two different angles seemed to help.

For calming, we found a detuned radio helped.  White noise in general worked, but I wasn't happy leaving the hairdryer running for hours on end.  Radio 3 worked ok, but Gregorian chants at 3am make you feel like you are on a different planet, so we just knocked the tuner to white noise and left it.

Most important piece of advice - make the most of being able to just sit and cuddle your sleeping baby.  They grow up so fast and it's not long before they are too busy playing to have hours of cuddles. 

Erm, thinking..... if he starts being "off" take him to the Dr straight away (I'm sure you would anyway, but remember this as they get older).  Don't assume it's "probably a cold" - Squeak was really prone to ear infections which started off with coldy symptoms but slid into proper illness (temperature, vomiting) quite quickly and needed antibiotics to treat.  Hopefully your little lad won't get these, but it's worth knowing.   

The sleep deprivation doesn't last forever, and you'll probably start to function ok through the haze :) 

Nim

SA Chris

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 29221
  • Karma: +630/-11
    • http://groups.msn.com/ChrisClix
#18 Re: gooDADvice
January 03, 2010, 07:53:52 am
Had 3 x 2 hr sleeps last night, bonus!!!! Getting the winding down, managing to bring up a good belch is highly satisfying.

Got a book that is proving to be really useful - "the new father - a dad's guide to the first year" by Armin A Brott.

Also a great hassle saver - got dimmer switches fitted in a few rooms - not only great for adjusting light in day  / night, but also great for turning lights on with shoulder (or head in shorty's case) with hands full. 

SA Chris

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 29221
  • Karma: +630/-11
    • http://groups.msn.com/ChrisClix
#19 Re: gooDADvice
January 03, 2010, 07:56:20 am

Start roughening up his little knees and elbows now, ready for his first chimneys in a few years :)

No child of mine will be allowed to partake in such ridiculous activities.

Mike Tyson

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 2075
  • Karma: +94/-2
#20 Re: gooDADvice
January 03, 2010, 08:14:58 am
Glad it's going well Chris, get the routine going and stick to it. We did with out little girl and it's paid off big time.

Having said that, she has woken me up for breakfast this morning
when it was supposed to be my turn for a sleep in. Not her fault though!

One other little tip which is not the most Eco friendly but works is short car journeys. I have seen myself put the wee un in the car and drive 5-10 miles to get her to sleep. Only used as a last resort but has saved my sanity a few times. Just be careful as you may well be tired yourself!

All the advice that others have given I agree with. The biggest thing as mentioned is getting them in a routine. It makes everyone function better.

GCW

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • No longer a
  • Posts: 8172
  • Karma: +364/-38
#21 Re: gooDADvice
January 03, 2010, 09:43:43 am
I have seen myself put the wee un in the car and drive 5-10 miles to get her to sleep.

I have previously been found walking the streets with a screaming child in a pram at 3am.  Luckily the old pram had a couple of cup holders, so at least I got a beer for the trouble.

Mike Tyson

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 2075
  • Karma: +94/-2
#22 Re: gooDADvice
January 03, 2010, 09:48:55 am
Luckily the old pram had a couple of cup holders, so at least I got a beer for the trouble.

Possibly the best advice anyone has given so far! Don't forget pint pot/beer can holder options when considering your pram choice.

Graeme78

Offline
  • **
  • player
  • Posts: 97
  • Karma: +2/-0
#23 Re: gooDADvice
January 03, 2010, 09:58:46 am
Try and stay calm. My Mrs used to get worked up when ours wouldn't take a feed, if you can stay calm they'll respond better to you.
« Last Edit: January 03, 2010, 10:04:36 am by Graeme78 »

Andy F

Offline
  • *****
  • forum hero
  • Posts: 1985
  • Karma: +129/-13
  • Ex-ex-climber
#24 Re: gooDADvice
January 03, 2010, 04:16:07 pm

"The contented little baby book" by Gina Ford - 9 years ago I had no idea how to look after a baby, no one nearby who knew and a baby that didn't sleep for much more than an hour at a time. I followed the feeding and sleeping routines in this book and we were sorted. If you end up at the point where you just want to be told what to do coz your too tired to make your own decisions then this is a fine book to get.

Seconded. A very good book to follow regarding feeding and sleeping patterns. My missus followed it for our first and plans to do the same for offspring number 2

 

SimplePortal 2.3.7 © 2008-2024, SimplePortal